lizi
Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009 Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep quote:
ORIGINAL: Sherrr I am 34 years old. The half-plus-seven rule would put me with a 54 year-old man. Ew. Someone that age would be even more out of the question for me if I was like most other childless women my age (dying to have babies before it's too late). How likely do you think I would be to hitch my wagon to the star of a 54 year-old and start a family? When the kids are teenagers, Dad will be in his 70's. He'll probably be dead before the kids graduate college. Our sex life will have been dead long before that. These cradle-robbers live in denial about such issues. To a 54 year-old who wanted to date me, I would ask him to think about how hot he now finds 74 year-old women. That, after all, is the age he'll be when I'm 54. this is a really good post. i'm 27; half + 7 would = 40, which is not really an issue for me, and i've been attracted to 40 year old guys (my Top friend is 43), and even 50 year old guys. =p and i've met some who are vibrant and strong and have a lot of life left in them, for lack of a better phrase. =p i like older guys and feel "better" around them, usually. but when you're 27 and wanting to settle down and find a long-term relationship, a guy much older than you is just not a good choice because whereas a 27 year old wants to have kids, usually the older men have been there, done that, and want to enjoy their retired life in leisure, which is fine, but a pretty serious clash in lifeplans. i'm not the clubbing-going-out-every-night type, but sometimes i do want to go frolicking, and a lot of older men get pretty stodgy about that. plus... there's the ever-present sex drive issue. if mine is already high (like, obnoxiously high), it may very well remain that way well into my 40s, and if i got with a much older man now, his would be declining and only continue to decline, which would just become an element of frustration for both of us. most men take it veeeery personally when the chick they're with wants sex more than they do. the absolute max that i would consider dating at this point is maaaaybe 45, and it would depend on a lot of things. =p Yeah, I wanted to bring this up too. Your age OP is a factor. It's a factor for me and I'm 50, I don't want to take care of anyone. I've taken obnoxiously good care of myself so that no one will have to hopefully take care of me, I want the same thing in return. I know you are saying that you take care of yourself and that's not my point- my point is that it's something I take into account right from the start and I have reasons for doing that. As an older woman, I generally don't date above my own age by much. I mean if I get with someone and things come up, well that's life. But it's a factor, age, and it's something i consider heavily and I'm an old broad. The sex drive thing is a huge issue starting when I was in my 40's as that's when men start having trouble while I'm still in overdrive. Age is definitely something I consider. Once again if sex issues come up with someone I care for then it's just a bump in the road, but if I am single and starting out fresh...who or what do you think I'm looking for if I like to get some action? Working parts would be my goal there. OP, you bringing up this supposed 'old rule for guys' that justifies seeking out a younger woman- wtf? What a bit of hogwash. What's the rule for women? It's like you latched onto that trivial piece of bulldoody because it justifies your seeking out a young partner. Geez, just go out and look for a young woman if you want it, but don't try to present that as anything factual or scientific because that makes you look silly. According to your freakishly stupid rule I'd have to be looking for an 86 year old...! Are you serious? Can you see the match that would make...here's me, working out 5-6 times a week, biking (bicycles and motorcycles), kayaking, hiking, volunteering, etc etc etc. I am a seriously active person, matching activity levels with someone makes or breaks my relationships. I"m not presenting myself as superior, I"m simply saying I have nothing in common with men that don't have my outlook. I am in school currently for a new profession and I am the top in the class with a 99% in grades. I am financially secure from other endeavors in my life, I don't need to work, but am doing it because I have something left to give and I want to have an active life. Please tell me what in holy hell I'd have in common with an 86 year old unless he was really an exception to the general population of 86 year old men? Would he ever be able to have sex with me? I want sex. Would he go to the gym with me like my current sweetie does? I'm not that special or unusual. Look around and see tons of women my age working, taking care of their homes and families, plus the grandchildren and a million other things. An 86 year old guy who is dead by the current US life expectancy level of 75 (for men, 80 for women) isn't going to cut it for me. Perhaps I'll just walk down to the local cemetery and pick out a gravestone to date...Hi Honey, what did you do today? I take care of 86 year olds in the nursing home where I volunteer, I'm not signing up for that crap as a relationship. Holy cow, did you think before you posted that 'rule' or did it just sound good because it conveniently gave you a place to justify your own preferences? Who cares about you wanting the young hotties, go get one, but don't try to tell me to be pushing around someone's wheelchair because it's somehow my place as a 50 year old woman and somehow it's the 'right' or 'accepted' thing to do.
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