quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

So I didn't misread you. :)

Honestly, OP, it's not like we aren't trying to help, in our scattershot way. Being trans is a hard path, and there are lots more resources available to you than there were in past years. Build a support system, and get your head straight. Unless you have been the genius of hiding your personality, it's possible that your family *suspects* that you are not heteronormative.

Good luck.

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

And he also stated that YOU PEOPLE that means EVERYONE... not just some here and there, keep attacking me. I didnt see a lot of attacks. Sorry, I saw a lot of people that tried to help him and he just continued to whine on. I didnt see anyone picking on him. Not at all. I saw people that were questioning him on why he is bothering on how to fix a mistake, but yet is in turn setting himself up for more of the same on what his fear is based on. And then he goes on to say that by replying to him .. by his words picking on him ... all of us? some of us?.. are making OURSELVES LOOK STUPID.

... REALLY? well at least I didnt send a complete internet stranger compromised pictures with written communication on whom I am, and then come to a public forum and contradict myself every single time I posted. I read a lot of .. I am saying one thing but mean another and its everyones fault here but mine.. so thus that makes everyone here STUPID by trying to help me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I didn't catch that he was responding to specific posts...just that the story seemed rather fluid, and the excuses aplenty. Which is perhaps typical of this place. I often wonder why anyone would come here looking for ADVICE from internet strangers.

quote:

It's called being considerate and thoughtful.

quote:

If they ever thought that their son was to be this way they would disown him just to purify the family name.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynn

quote:

It's called being considerate and thoughtful.

yea, well maybe you just skimmed the fucking post i was replying to where we were told that the op's family  would:

quote:

If they ever thought that their son was to be this way they would disown him just to purify the family name.

now just exactly where the fuck is there anything considerate or thoughtful of the op in that shit? and how the fuck do you consider people who would do that to be worthy of any consideration whatsoever?

like i said, if they really are like that then fuck them, they are fucking toxic and he is better off with them gone from his life.

maybe next time you'll read what is posted in context and actually understand what was fucking said.

quote:

I am considerate because it's the way I want to be

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynn

quote:

I am considerate because it's the way I want to be

by "considerate" here you mean spineless doormat, right?

look most of the guy's family are religious fucking lunatics and the less he has to do with them and their vile creed the better off he will be. i don't care who the fuck you are or how pleasant a person you like to be, people like that will seriously fuck up your head, and you're either a complete idiot or majorly self-destructive if you don't cut them out of your life at the first fucking opportunity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

And he also stated that YOU PEOPLE that means EVERYONE... not just some here and there, keep attacking me. I didnt see a lot of attacks. Sorry, I saw a lot of people that tried to help him and he just continued to whine on. I didnt see anyone picking on him. Not at all. I saw people that were questioning him on why he is bothering on how to fix a mistake, but yet is in turn setting himself up for more of the same on what his fear is based on. And then he goes on to say that by replying to him .. by his words picking on him ... all of us? some of us?.. are making OURSELVES LOOK STUPID.

... REALLY? well at least I didnt send a complete internet stranger compromised pictures with written communication on whom I am, and then come to a public forum and contradict myself every single time I posted. I read a lot of .. I am saying one thing but mean another and its everyones fault here but mine.. so thus that makes everyone here STUPID by trying to help me.

No, That doesn't mean everyone. It means the ones that were *picking on him*.  I've no doubt that's how it might feel to be on the recieving end of some of the frightful posts here.

He thanked the people that gave him constructive advice. (read back)

I saw very little *whining on*, if any.

He is the person best placed to make the decisions to utilise any advice given. I would be exactly the same way.

He didn't say he was afraid.To recap, this is what he asked.

Quote:

1) How exactly do I deal with this?

2) My family is going to find out that I'm a transgender, what do I say to them?

3) Has anyone else dealt with something like this?

Let me know what you think, thanks.

Unquote.

No mention of *fear*. He's also made it quite clear (twice) that he's not *afraid*.

The posts he quoted were yours and SB's when he made those remarks and frankly, I thought the same. I think he was remarkable restrained with his responses considering the nature of those posts. I doubt very much that he was including the people he thanked, wouldn't you agree?

He didn't call EVERYONE stupid Janah, he marked YOURS and SB's post out. Maybe ask yourself why.

agirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: ETOX123

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynn

quote:

I am considerate because it's the way I want to be

by "considerate" here you mean spineless doormat, right?

look most of the guy's family are religious fucking lunatics and the less he has to do with them and their vile creed the better off he will be. i don't care who the fuck you are or how pleasant a person you like to be, people like that will seriously fuck up your head, and you're either a complete idiot or majorly self-destructive if you don't cut them out of your life at the first fucking opportunity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynn

quote:

I am considerate because it's the way I want to be

by "considerate" here you mean spineless doormat, right?

look most of the guy's family are religious fucking lunatics and the less he has to do with them and their vile creed the better off he will be. i don't care who the fuck you are or how pleasant a person you like to be, people like that will seriously fuck up your head, and you're either a complete idiot or majorly self-destructive if you don't cut them out of your life at the first fucking opportunity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

And he also stated that YOU PEOPLE that means EVERYONE... not just some here and there, keep attacking me. I didnt see a lot of attacks. Sorry, I saw a lot of people that tried to help him and he just continued to whine on. I didnt see anyone picking on him. Not at all. I saw people that were questioning him on why he is bothering on how to fix a mistake, but yet is in turn setting himself up for more of the same on what his fear is based on. And then he goes on to say that by replying to him .. by his words picking on him ... all of us? some of us?.. are making OURSELVES LOOK STUPID.

... REALLY? well at least I didnt send a complete internet stranger compromised pictures with written communication on whom I am, and then come to a public forum and contradict myself every single time I posted. I read a lot of .. I am saying one thing but mean another and its everyones fault here but mine.. so thus that makes everyone here STUPID by trying to help me.

No, That doesn't mean everyone. It means the ones that were *picking on him*.  I've no doubt that's how it might feel to be on the recieving end of some of the frightful posts here.

He thanked the people that gave him constructive advice. (read back)

I saw very little *whining on*, if any.

He is the person best placed to make the decisions to utilise any advice given. I would be exactly the same way.

He didn't say he was afraid.To recap, this is what he asked.

Quote:

1) How exactly do I deal with this?

2) My family is going to find out that I'm a transgender, what do I say to them?

3) Has anyone else dealt with something like this?

Let me know what you think, thanks.

Unquote.

No mention of *fear*. He's also made it quite clear (twice) that he's not *afraid*.

The posts he quoted were yours and SB's when he made those remarks and frankly, I thought the same. I think he was remarkable restrained with his responses considering the nature of those posts. I doubt very much that he was including the people he thanked, wouldn't you agree?

He didn't call EVERYONE stupid Janah, he marked YOURS and SB's post out. Maybe ask yourself why.

agirl

Jeez I just have to chime in here. agirl did you even read the first post? Directly from the initial post.

I finally flat out told her that I wouldn't be blackmailed or bullied into submitting, especially since she decided to resort to it before the first meeting. She claims that she will ruin me socially and professionally, and she will do it within the next few days. As to how she got all of her information, I don't know, but all of it is spot on and I know for a fact that she can destroy me. That said, I have a few questions:



How convenient of you to leave out the preceding paragraph when quoting the first post. What are you a journalist or something???

When ppl use the words "destroy" and "ruin" I tend to think that person is in some serious shit... but that's just me furthermore when someone writes that stuff I figure them to "worried or afraid" thou YMMV.

Now come to find out <again in the OP> That he is worried cuz his mommy <read family> might find out that he wears high heels <read who he is as a person> Really "ruin and destroy" cuz you wear dresses just a tad dramatic don't ya think??? To my mind that makes him a coward. YES a coward.

I'm glad you asked me why I say that. He is more concerned what others think of him ...than who he is. As I have said before in countless post. I dont run around telling ppl that I enjoi smacking bitches around however I am not ashamed of it either.

Just like I dont tell my kids "ya know I had a great time fucking your mother last night" it falls under TMI and private information. Yet my kid know that at some point I had sex with their mom. That concept of NOT be ashamed of what you do <read who you are as a person> is healthy. The person that is "ashamed" and "hides" is a coward in my book. My assessment of the situation has not changed.

Real simple shit "Live by your convictions"

BadOne

quote:

There is a trend among the under 30 posters to get whiny when they don't get total validation...we become bad guys and "haters", they get all defensive and nasty, and the cycle continues. At least none of us are fat cows yet.

quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

There is a trend among the under 30 posters to get whiny when they don't get total validation...we become bad guys and "haters", they get all defensive and nasty, and the cycle continues. At least none of us are fat cows yet.

This reminded of me when I was in charge of volunteers at a yoga retreat center and one of them accused me of "violent speech" after I said, "Ok, it's after 9 AM, time to get to work."

quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt
Now, this young man may very well eventually realize in order to be true to himself, he has to come out to his family. I, for one, am willing to cut him some slack. He's got a lot on his plate.