Collar Me and socializing

Collar Me and socializing (Full Version)

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werebeastie -> Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 5:49:35 AM)
Greetings and salutations dear reader, For some time my life has been moving in a generally positive direction and I have certainly been enjoying this latest period of activity and transition. The most glaring deficit in my life has been my lack of a deeply intimate interpersonal relationship. If I were a more vanilla type fellow this problem would have been a breeze to solve but I am not looking for a vanilla relationship … even if she likes to play a little kinky. If I am going to invest my time and effort into building a deeply intimate interpersonal relationship I want it to be holistic, encompassing all aspects of our personalities, desires, needs, proclivities and interests. If I am going to invest in such a relationship I will pursue that which I want … a slave. I have periodically given myself some window of time in which to find said slave and thus far no long term success. My membership here at Collar Me was something of a group intervention with many concerned kin and kith encouraging me to “get a life”, “find someone” and other such sentiments. The account I now have was created by an enthusiastic and well meaning slave friend I’ve known for a very long time. I paid little attention to the site/account until I recently reached a point where I might devote some time to the site and the search for my slave. I admittedly thought of Collar Me as more of a “personals” for the kinky set. I mention this because I have also had as a goal the quality increase of my social circle, preferably in those areas of most interest to me. I had never really thought of an online site as being a place wherein I might find or develop social relationships. Still while recovering from recent surgery I found myself at home with a lot of time and a lot of activity restrictions … got on the computer. I began to look at the site and tinker with the various offerings. I spotted the chat rooms and thought this might be the way to go and jumped in … there is very little “chatting” that goes on in those chat rooms … or perhaps everyone just gets quiet when I come in … nah, I was right to begin with, there is very little chatting going on in those rooms … and that which is taking place is usually between established friends who have been there forever. The whole affair just doesn’t seem … productive. Honestly I believe I could chain myself to my chair, spend a day doing nothing but “talking” in the chat rooms and still not have a decent conversation much less have begun to get to know someone. I next found the message boards and they at least had something to say … and people actually responded to what was said … nice. Then, one day, I found I had something to say, so I posted it and then posted another … didn’t really know what to expect but I was pleasantly surprised to find that people had indeed read my post and had actually commented. The great majority of the people I talked with were friendly, intelligent, insightful and they were nice enough to share their suggestions on how I might make a better go at this cyber undertaking. I was quite pleased with all that had happened and pleased with the quality of the folks I had met. Then, I got busy again. I find that when I am busy and get some down time I am not especially drawn to sitting on my ass inside my house tap tapping at a keyboard … it lacks some aspect of socializing I find necessary to devote long term effort to it. Perhaps it’s the physical tangible realness of people or it could be my lack of enthusiasm for sitting on my ass inside or perhaps some of both. This is a dilemma for me as I genuinely enjoyed my interactions on here. So here I am again with something to say. Nothing profound so much just shouting out those things that are most vexing to me just now. I will continue my search and I will continue to post and perhaps slowly I will come to know people and develop that circle of friends and acquaintances that draw me here more regularly. I will continue to become more deeply involved in the local scene … within the limits of my admittedly less than gregarious nature. It is in my nature and plans to allow my slave to lead us in the social pleasantries, obligations and such. Thoughts, comments, suggestions?

Kana -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 5:51:24 AM)
quote: Greetings and salutations dear reader, Lost me right there. The rest is just a blur... Edited to add that the OP's edit makes it a whole lot better

TheFireWithinMe -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 5:55:16 AM)
Paragraphs are your friend. Until then, I'm not even going to try to read it. ETA: Much better ;o) I'm not sure what you're asking though. Could you clarify?

Whenready -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 5:58:56 AM)
Think of the place as a virtual pub. There are a lot here who you won't be interested in - and others who won't be interested in you - and that's not making a value judgement either way. If you don't spend time here, you are unlikely to get to know folk. If, however, you are happier outdoors (if I picked that inference up correctly) then go outdoors and see who you meet there. Good luck!

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:00:06 AM)
perhaps glasses would help ... Hopkins has a rather well thought of eye clinic, I suggest you avail yourself of their medical expertise

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:03:17 AM)
Ha, you nailed it Whenready. I will eventually find the mix that allows me to come to know people here and still have a real-life life.

angelikaJ -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:03:34 AM)
Finding someone isn't all that difficult. It just requires time and patience. It took 18 months of my being here for my One to find me (and I "wasn't looking"). He was local to me ... (the rest of the story is in my sig-line). Enjoy the journey and best wishes.

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:05:29 AM)
Hello Fire, How are you love? I've fixed the paragraphs ... not sure how they were lost in transition ... I give you a heads up, it may not be worth reading ... just me ranting

Ninebelowzero -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:06:49 AM)
Yo Werebeastie my glasses got broke this morning & I can't read it either mate. Will try later when I find someone with 20-20 to superglue them. quote: ORIGINAL: werebeastie perhaps glasses would help ... Hopkins has a rather well thought of eye clinic, I suggest you avail yourself of their medical expertise

LillyBoPeep -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:07:37 AM)
1) Not all chat-rooms are created equal -- Passion for Submission is a great one, but sometimes it's fast and not a good format to those who tend towards verbosity. =p Nothing wrong with it, but you do use a lot of words. =p 2) You would prefer for your girl to be the social butterfly? Go to a party/munch/whatever and meet the single chicks who are buzzing around talking to everyone. If you want a girl who's active in the scene, you'll usually have to go to the scene to find her. That said, for me, it tends to be the opposite. =p I like socializing even though I can be pretty shy, but a lot of the single dudes 'round these parts (Nebraska) are paranoid of being outed because the general Nebraskan culture is so conservative. So they don't participate and bash on those who do. =p The scene has little to offer me, as far as meeting people goes. Where you live it may be similar, but you'll never know until you try. 3) If you want to get to know people, post about other topics besides yourself. (That sounds worse than I mean it to.) What I mean is, give your opinion on threads. Let people see how you think and WHAT you think. Who are you as a Dominant? We get that you're very interested in your personal journey, but sometimes you have to also try to relate to others, too.

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:14:41 AM)
angelika ... thank you for your comments, I saw you post. It was quite heartening for me and I thank you for that as well.

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:23:04 AM)
Nbz, Hello my friend. I wrote that post in Word and transferred it here ... I have since gone in and edited it to once again establish the paragraphs ... have they not shown up for everyone else, they show on my screen. How are you? I am not certain what part of the UK you are in but I have to imagine its getting rather winter like there ... We've had snow twice here the first over a foot and these latest just pretty with no accumulation.

TheFireWithinMe -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:23:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: angelikaJ Finding someone isn't all that difficult. It just requires time and patience. It took 18 months of my being here for my One to find me (and I "wasn't looking"). He was local to me ... (the rest of the story is in my sig-line). Enjoy the journey and best wishes. I agree BUT no amount of socializing is going to help if your posts and profile don't match. Your profile (last time I looked at it anyway) stated you're not looking for anything other than a slave for domestic/secretarial stuff but what you've written here sounds entirely different.

Hillwilliam -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:27:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: werebeastie Nbz, Hello my friend. I wrote that post in Word and transferred it here ... I have since gone in and edited it to once again establish the paragraphs ... have they not shown up for everyone else, they show on my screen. How are you? I am not certain what part of the UK you are in but I have to imagine its getting rather winter like there ... We've had snow twice here the first over a foot and these latest just pretty with no accumulation. Paragraph breaks didn't show up initially but they do show up now.

kalikshama -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (W Va) (11/19/2011 6:29:54 AM)
Maybe some of your fellow West Virginians will be along and point you towards the local scene. I love the forums here; never been in the chat rooms. I think of CM as one of many networking opportunities - have you looked into Fet for local kinky activities? I met lots of fun play partners here on CM; I met the guy I'm now living with on OKCupid. I had kinky keywords in my profile there and did keyword searches for guys who mentioned "assertive," "dominant," etc.

Fornica -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:33:19 AM)
Get to know people as people. Talk to them about their interests. And trim it down a notch. That's my advice for the day. You're welcome :) quote: ORIGINAL: werebeastie Greetings and salutations dear reader, For some time my life has been moving in a generally positive direction and I have certainly been enjoying this latest period of activity and transition. The most glaring deficit in my life has been my lack of a deeply intimate interpersonal relationship. If I were a more vanilla type fellow this problem would have been a breeze to solve but I am not looking for a vanilla relationship … even if she likes to play a little kinky. If I am going to invest my time and effort into building a deeply intimate interpersonal relationship I want it to be holistic, encompassing all aspects of our personalities, desires, needs, proclivities and interests. If I am going to invest in such a relationship I will pursue that which I want … a slave. I have periodically given myself some window of time in which to find said slave and thus far no long term success. My membership here at Collar Me was something of a group intervention with many concerned kin and kith encouraging me to “get a life”, “find someone” and other such sentiments. The account I now have was created by an enthusiastic and well meaning slave friend I’ve known for a very long time. I paid little attention to the site/account until I recently reached a point where I might devote some time to the site and the search for my slave. I admittedly thought of Collar Me as more of a “personals” for the kinky set. I mention this because I have also had as a goal the quality increase of my social circle, preferably in those areas of most interest to me. I had never really thought of an online site as being a place wherein I might find or develop social relationships. Still while recovering from recent surgery I found myself at home with a lot of time and a lot of activity restrictions … got on the computer. I began to look at the site and tinker with the various offerings. I spotted the chat rooms and thought this might be the way to go and jumped in … there is very little “chatting” that goes on in those chat rooms … or perhaps everyone just gets quiet when I come in … nah, I was right to begin with, there is very little chatting going on in those rooms … and that which is taking place is usually between established friends who have been there forever. The whole affair just doesn’t seem … productive. Honestly I believe I could chain myself to my chair, spend a day doing nothing but “talking” in the chat rooms and still not have a decent conversation much less have begun to get to know someone. I next found the message boards and they at least had something to say … and people actually responded to what was said … nice. Then, one day, I found I had something to say, so I posted it and then posted another … didn’t really know what to expect but I was pleasantly surprised to find that people had indeed read my post and had actually commented. The great majority of the people I talked with were friendly, intelligent, insightful and they were nice enough to share their suggestions on how I might make a better go at this cyber undertaking. I was quite pleased with all that had happened and pleased with the quality of the folks I had met. Then, I got busy again. I find that when I am busy and get some down time I am not especially drawn to sitting on my ass inside my house tap tapping at a keyboard … it lacks some aspect of socializing I find necessary to devote long term effort to it. Perhaps it’s the physical tangible realness of people or it could be my lack of enthusiasm for sitting on my ass inside or perhaps some of both. This is a dilemma for me as I genuinely enjoyed my interactions on here. So here I am again with something to say. Nothing profound so much just shouting out those things that are most vexing to me just now. I will continue my search and I will continue to post and perhaps slowly I will come to know people and develop that circle of friends and acquaintances that draw me here more regularly. I will continue to become more deeply involved in the local scene … within the limits of my admittedly less than gregarious nature. It is in my nature and plans to allow my slave to lead us in the social pleasantries, obligations and such. Thoughts, comments, suggestions?

Ninebelowzero -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:34:33 AM)
hey there, it's wierd here at the moment (Uttoxeter Staffordshire where the Dukes of Hazzard meets the Munsters) I'm at work in a factory by 5.30 am by the big access gatews & at that time I can be in tees & half an hr later freezing my tits off. It's like that all the time at the moment. We won't get snow much round here, the hills keep it of us though last yr we got a foot that was here for weeks which is not usual. But then I got sunburn last Easter swimming in the local river with my kid & I tan easy. We need snow this yr as me & boy have boards to try out & I might like to crash & burn on ski's again. I'm envious of your hunting over there used to do a lot of boar & deer stalking when my sight & shoulder still worked.

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:39:35 AM)
lbp, you are absolutely correct on #3 and I suspect you are dead on or damned close on the other two. I have read a bunch of the threads on here ... I have commented on a few but honestly when reading some of them ... here I am referring specifically to the ones I find interesting and would comment on ... I find that someone has often said that which I would have said and just do not see the point in redundancy ... perhaps I am looking at it wrong? As for #2, I really don't know the full answer. I am in the process of becoming more active locally but do not know how the mainstream around here perceive it ... I am just as out of touch with the mainstream as I am anyone and everyone else hehehe and besides I really do not care what Mainstream's opinion of me or the lifestyle is. I think the scene here is bolstered by and perhaps a bit insulated because of the college and industry in this county change the normal (for this state) demographics. I will take your advice and check out those chat rooms ... social butterfly??? hmmm probably not ... but certainly someone more social than I ... well that sounds wrong I am social ... sort of

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:41:33 AM)
Good morning HW ...

werebeastie -> RE: Collar Me and socializing (11/19/2011 6:42:48 AM)
Fornica, good advice, thanks.

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