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Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/21/2011 10:17:25 PM   
jerhende


Posts: 2
Joined: 11/21/2011
Status: offline 		So, I'm not really sure how this is supposed to go, but I thought I would come by and say hello anyway...

I'm a 26 year old male in the Portland, OR area with absolutely zero experience in the bdsm/kink world. I decided that I might as well dip my toe in the pond, and see what happens. I've always been interesting in bondage, power imbalances in sexual relationships, and so I thought I might actually be able to meet someone to help me explore those things, and possibly more here.

I do have one question though...I'm most attracted to imbalances of power in relationships/encounters...I don't feel the need to identify as either sub or dom, because I'm interested in both power dynamics, but how do I explore these relationships if I'm still totally new to it. Should I be looking for someone who can help me out with this, or just jump right into the deep end.

Thanks for the advice in advance.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/21/2011 10:22:02 PM   
Fornica


Posts: 2986
Status: offline 		First~ welcome :)
Don't worry about fitting yourself into a label one way or another. Read lots, talk to people, join local groups..and then read some more! You'll find what works for you :)

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There is no spoon.


(in reply to jerhende)
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RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/21/2011 10:53:07 PM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline 		What Fornica said :-) She knows from whence she speaks.

Welcome! You came in with a stellar intro, congratulations! Hang out, read the boards, ask questions, get to know people here. The only other advice I would add is when contacting folks on the other side, approach them as regular folks. Just like you did here :-)

You're on your way! Enjoy the journey and good luck in your search.

(in reply to jerhende)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/21/2011 11:02:35 PM   
jerhende


Posts: 2
Joined: 11/21/2011
Status: offline 		To the two fine ladies who have chimed in...Thank you! New cultures are complicated...and putting yourself out there is even harder. One more question...it seems like there isn't a large community of people on the personals side of the site (at least in Portland). What are other way to go ahead and meet like minded people?

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/21/2011 11:09:17 PM   
Fornica


Posts: 2986
Status: offline 		Check out local groups on Fetlife, and leave lots of boxes unchecked on the profiles side on here.
Don't start out trying to find a chick..learn how things work first :)
And, because you are so polite and such- I would really recommend against the "shirtless in the mirror" pose..take a nice normal, non skin showing one. It's more attractive to potential friends and potential mates :)

_____________________________

There is no spoon.


(in reply to jerhende)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/22/2011 12:58:02 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		What Fornica and MDA said... and Welcome!!

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Fornica)
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RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/22/2011 1:21:26 AM   
OohAahMrs


Posts: 7723
Joined: 7/14/2010
Status: offline 		Welcome jer, you've made a good start, you might be able to avoid the deep end, or maybe not!

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You may choc the choc.........Oh forget it......

(in reply to jerhende)
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RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/22/2011 5:02:53 AM   
searching4mysir


Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline 		FR








Welcome to the discussion side of CM! Take your coat off and stay awhile. These boards can be fascinating You're off to a great start.

(in reply to OohAahMrs)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/22/2011 5:20:55 AM   
Buzzzz


Posts: 839
Joined: 11/28/2010
Status: offline 		NIce refreshing intro. What everybody else says. Go on fet and click on the "event " tab and then on the "near me" tab. That should get yourself going. anything you find that could interest you, contact the event leader thru the fet email sydtem (not the public wall post) and go from there. With your respectful and honest attitude, it should be a breeze.

Safe journeys, Buzz.

_____________________________

_"Here is something you should never do to anyone.And here is exactly how to do it to someone you care about". Flagg._



(in reply to searching4mysir)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Greetings from a total fish out of water - 11/22/2011 5:23:36 AM   
ashjor911


Posts: 7793
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: balcony, having a Smoke
Status: offline 		Welcome To CM

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"operative" working undercover for the federal government of bangladesh.

my name is : bonsh ... jamesh bonsh.
code name : 009.5
licensed to give formla

(in reply to Buzzzz)
Profile   Post #: 10
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