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RE: Sensual Domination - 10/23/2004 10:11:42 AM   
typesgirl


Posts: 102
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline 		So perhaps a term is needed. Not "sensual" but something else that describes the kind of domination Master and i are describing. *sets her brain to think of suggestions*
typesgirl

< Message edited by typesgirl -- 10/23/2004 10:14:15 AM >

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Sensual Domination - 10/23/2004 10:16:36 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		We (my Dom and I) normally refer to it as D/s.

(in reply to typesgirl)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Sensual Domination - 10/23/2004 10:28:51 AM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire
We (my Dom and I) normally refer to it as D/s.


That sounds just about right to me.

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Sensual Domination - 10/23/2004 10:33:18 AM   
MrThorns


Posts: 919
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline 		I enjoy sensual play, and have referred to myself as a sensual sadist in the past. I wouldn't say that sensual play is about "building up" versus "tearing down" though. In my efforts to help a girl realize her slavery, it has required a combination of the sensual and the sadistic. I'm Evil to the core, but all of my efforts are geared towards building up my slave so that she can realize her full potential. Some days, a nice, soft and sensual scene may be what is required. Other days, she may be dragged into the dungeon by her hair and caned fiercely until she almost tears the cross from the wall. Both the sensual and the sadistic play a part in her training.

~Thorns

_____________________________

~"Do you know what the chain of command is? Its the chain I beat ya with when ya don't follow my command."

"My inner child is a mean little fucker"

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/9/2007 8:37:26 PM   
chastitybelt


Posts: 32
Joined: 1/14/2007
Status: offline 		It's so good to  find other people who enjoy sensual dominance

< Message edited by chastitybelt -- 3/9/2007 8:38:08 PM >

(in reply to MrThorns)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/9/2007 9:42:38 PM   
LadyIce


Posts: 406
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline 		Just a thought, I would say 80% of the time that I hear about Sensual Domination,
there is usually a Dominant woman involved.
Any idea's why so few men call themselves a sensual Dominant?
Just wondering about this distinction.

(in reply to TypeWriter)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/9/2007 9:45:29 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TypeWriter

Folks,

My delicious butterfly and I have been discussing how our BDSM works and wondering if there are others interested in the way we do things.

I consider myself a sensual dominant. I aminterested in building up and not tearing down.

I do not believe in hurting or insulting or humilating my sub. I celebrate her and raise her up.

We are not vanilla, our D/s is very mental in nature.

Are we alone here or are their others who feel this way?

M






You are definitely not alone in this, TypeWriter.  This describes to a "T" how Master approaches O/our relationship.  He has actually used the exact same terms "build up" and "raise up."  He has told me that, after 10+ years in the lifestyle and looking, He finally found me - the slave who is perfect for Him.  He celebrates my intellect, my sense of humor, and all that i am and says that, by owning me, it raises Him up.  So why would He want to do anything less than raise me up, as well?  He has no interest in harming me, insulting me, or degrading me and has always respected my hard limits (of which i have very few).  Does He inflict pain on me?  Absolutely.  Does He refer to me as His cunt and such?  Yes, He does.  But these are not harmful, insulting, degrading things in either of O/our eyes.  W/we both know that He values me as His most prized possession and constantly tells me how proud He is of me and my service to Him.  He is fond of saying that many people mistake kindness for weakness.  In His opinion, many people think that if a Master isn't harsh, humorless, and derogatory toward His slave, they aren't "real."  Needless to say, that is NOT His way of thinking....slave luci   

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to TypeWriter)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/9/2007 9:52:57 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I dont see why being a sensual dominant and humiliation your sub have to be mutualy exclusive.
Angel is very into humiliation and verbal degredation.  I consider myself a very sensual Domme, because I use softer touches and very seductive and arousing means to play with him.  I never use pain, unless he has misbehaved.  However, this has nothing to do with the fact that while we play, I will also be very humilating and harsh with what I say to him.
Outside of play, I am nurturing and mothering to him. I build him up as much as I possibly can, becasue he is my baby. He knows that I am proud of him and what he has accomplished, and he knows that there is no way I would ever give him up for anyone else.  That isnt sensual, though.  Sensual is all in the touch.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/9/2007 10:19:16 PM   
michaels4evr


Posts: 184
Joined: 8/8/2006
Status: offline 		I don't know if the discussion about the scene prior to has anything to do with sensuality vs...?? Master and i never discuss our scenes beforehand, probably because we don't really view them as scenes..whether they are in private or at a play event, our interactions tend to be very spontaneous..on the fly..but are definately always sensual..whether he is spanking me lightly or caning me into oblivion..I always experience his touch as love..maybe that is the commonality you seek with others. I tend to find the dynamic between couples (or more) who are also "in love" extremely sensual.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/9/2007 10:36:17 PM   
szobras


Posts: 435
Joined: 9/18/2006
Status: offline 		I do not believe in hurting or insulting or humilating my sub.
 
Are we alone here or are their others who feel this way?

You are not alone.

(in reply to TypeWriter)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/9/2007 10:46:04 PM   
michaels4evr


Posts: 184
Joined: 8/8/2006
Status: offline 		there is a difference between hurting and harming imho

(in reply to szobras)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 1:49:47 AM   
Hime


Posts: 149
Joined: 10/31/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TypeWriter

I consider myself a sensual dominant. I aminterested in building up and not tearing down.
I do not believe in hurting or insulting or humilating my sub. I celebrate her and raise her up.
We are not vanilla, our D/s is very mental in nature.
Are we alone here or are their others who feel this way?


I too have found that my expression of D/s is a bit outside of a "widely accepted perception" (that D/s pertains to and favors Sadism/masochism "both mental/physical").

It is my nature to Inspire, Encourage, and Support the people around me (empowering/strengthening them) because doing so brings out the best attributes in my own character.

Okay....And, I have a selfish purpose too. I receive a great deal of satisfaction from Capturing the Hearts and Minds of Strong individuals.  The Power Trip is extremely intoxicating! 

As for Pain....
Personally, I only relate to the enjoyment of pain when it's coupled with a sexual act such as touching, sucking, kissing, probing, fu*cking, etc......If a sub or lover craved it simply for it's own sake and the request didn't undermine my authority or jeopardize the subs well being....I would gladly do it. 


~ xoxo

< Message edited by Hime -- 3/10/2007 1:56:45 AM >

(in reply to TypeWriter)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 3:12:45 AM   
WhiplashSmile


Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline 		I too consider myself to be a sensual dominate, with interests in building somebody up and not tearing them down.

However, the dynamics of hurt, insult, or humilation is rather different.  There is a difference between true damaging hurt and pain and that which is not. 

I tend to be involved with relationship where there is an exchange a loving insults and humilation.  Then again it's hard to hurt somebody with insulting words when they do not really hurt.  Sarcastic wit at times.  It tends to add a little edge and variety to the day to day life.

Mind you this requires a high level of self esteem, to be able to say and do these things.

The important part, when emotions are involved.  That she knows shes loved and valued.  That dirty humiliation and pain given in scene play is just that.   A Scene.   There is a difference between 24/7 life and Scene play.

Some subs/slave disire humilation and punishment, that is their mental state of being.  They require this to maintain their state of being.  So the Dom/Master give them this required pain, because they are meeting that desire and need.  It take strength to be able to give somebody pain that you love, and are doing so because you love them.

(in reply to TypeWriter)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 4:47:00 AM   
Peterlocked


Posts: 16
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		I think that most people miss the mental aspects of D/s, from what I've seen, most play, even at private parties skims the surface of  the physical.  It is truly rare to find a Dom(me) who is intrigued by the psychological play as well as the physical.  I wish you well.

peter

(in reply to TypeWriter)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 5:00:11 AM   
TNstepsout


Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		From what I've seen it appears that those D/s pairs that are in relationships tend to be more like you describe. There are other D/s pairs though who do not choose to become loving/affectionate with one another but maintain an understanding of the roles between them. There have been discussions in the past on both sides, but it seems that those who really grow to love each other have a lot less of the "tearing down" as you describe it. In fact, there have even been threads from Dom/mes who find it very difficult to hurt their subs once they come to love them.

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 7:35:43 AM   
Aine


Posts: 820
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline 		Fast reply to no one in particular
 
There is a huge difference between outright ABUSE whether it be verbal/physical or otherwise, and humiliation play, s/m and degredation play.
 
Those that are involved in s/m, degredation and humiliation are involved in it because they LIKE it.
 
It excited them and that has nothing at all to do with tearing someone down.  It's a consentual activity and hardly damaging to those involved.
 
Don't lump assholes who do it without consent to their subs just because they are assholes to those of us that Like it and consent to it. 
 
He does it for me because it turns me on (for what reason I can't fathom, but it does) and it does absolutely no damage to my psyche, my self-worth, self esteem, or emotions.  I feel just as loved, or even more loved than I did an hour before the playtime.  He cuddles me afterward, tells me he loves me and loves the way I glow after, just as much as when we just "make love".

_____________________________

Honey, you obviously missed the "want to be used as a toilet fetish" thread or "where do I get instructions on setting my sub on fire" thread. LOL

Thank you, DelRay for that one.

(in reply to TNstepsout)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 11:24:57 AM   
grlneedstolearn


Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TypeWriter

Folks,

My delicious butterfly and I have been discussing how our BDSM works and wondering if there are others interested in the way we do things.

I consider myself a sensual dominant. I aminterested in building up and not tearing down.

I do not believe in hurting or insulting or humilating my sub. I celebrate her and raise her up.

We are not vanilla, our D/s is very mental in nature.

Are we alone here or are their others who feel this way?

M






My Dom is the same way with me. He's sensual and doesn't want to tear me down. Instead he is working on my confidence and self-esteem. So no your not alone

(in reply to TypeWriter)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 11:54:49 AM   
simplewhispers


Posts: 232
Joined: 12/27/2006
Status: offline 		I need one ........

_____________________________

A silent woman is always more admired than a noisy one.
Season your admiration for a while With an attent ear. . .

simplewhispers

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 3:32:46 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		Daddy is a sensual Dom but with a twist. i enjoy being degraded and humiliated when He calls me 'my lil black whore' or 'black bitch' - you may not understand how hearing those words set my soul of fire because i crave (key word here crave) to hear these things from Him. it be hurtful to most of you but it's how He says it to me that tells how much He loves me. despite that minor twist - Daddy does nurtures me, celebrates my accomplishments, who i am and everything about me as well as encourages me in reaching my potential.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to simplewhispers)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Sensual Domination - 3/10/2007 5:32:51 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		We're D/s but not into s & m. Play for us means bondage and sex. He's also very nurturing and protective, very affectionate and affirming. Punishment has happened once in over three years. He's very much a natural leader, mentor, teacher. And I'm his avid follower.

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 40
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