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Looking for a second - 11/30/2011 8:11:12 PM   
lilmissdefiant


Posts: 666
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline 		Hello All
I've been on this site for a while and have cruised the forums and participated in a few good laughs, also made alot of friends on here but this time I am actually in need of something.

I finally got collared and owned, by a REAL Master, who I have met and served in real time so this isn't some online faux game.

After serving My Master he has asked me to find a second slave to serve him with me.
At the moment he just wants another toy to play with, to fullfill his fantasy of being served by two slaves, which I am more than happy to try and do for him. If Master wants something I will do my best to get it for him, and this is one of those things.

I am looking for a slave who is in my area and get to know as a good friend before asking her to travel down with me to serve, i want to have a connection with this slave because I am very protective of my Master and I want him to have the best. meaning I want someone who (like me) does what they are told and does it happily because they know it makes Master happy.
sorry if I am rambling lol

Anyways, if anyone is interested in getting to know me and possibly go to adelaide with me to serve my Master please drop me a line


_____________________________

Change what you can and accept what you can't.
He came to me one night. Explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! When satisfied, he left & I was hurt!!... Fu*king mosquito!

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Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Looking for a second - 11/30/2011 9:59:38 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline 		 
 oh boy...



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It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
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RE: Looking for a second - 11/30/2011 11:12:45 PM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		if it's that solid a relationship, why does your profile say you're still searching?

And what is the name of this Master?

The third (or "unicorn") that you are searching for is going to serve him, so surely they should deal with him rather than you? I understand that you want to be friends, which is great. But there has to be an attraction between the third and the Master or it's not going to happen.

If he can't/won't search for the third himself, then it speaks volumes about his ability to make decisions, form relationships and lead. None of it good.

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Looking for a second - 11/30/2011 11:45:56 PM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself

if it's that solid a relationship, why does your profile say you're still searching?

And what is the name of this Master?

The third (or "unicorn") that you are searching for is going to serve him, so surely they should deal with him rather than you? I understand that you want to be friends, which is great. But there has to be an attraction between the third and the Master or it's not going to happen.

If he can't/won't search for the third himself, then it speaks volumes about his ability to make decisions, form relationships and lead. None of it good.


I think she just failed to update her profile, since her journal talks about him quite a bit.

I have to disagree with you a bit on the search though. I'm not poly and don't pretend to fully understand it, but we see so many sub/slave come to the boards complaining about how their master is out searching for a third and they are completely excluded and whether or not they "mesh" with this sister-sub is treated as an irrelevancy.

It would seem that taking into account that additional sub/slaves all need to be able to co-exist and all must be able to function together is a positive step. She doesn't say that her master is going to accept or take on who she chooses, but at least this way, there will be no doubt that her and this other woman will be able to work together. I would think that she knows her master well enough (although I honestly didn't look to see how long they have been together) that she can "screen" potential unicorns.

While I have always hated the idea or reference to these searches being "interviews," in this respect it seems kind of appropriate. It is like when someone goes for a job interview. They are first screened by HR, and if HR thinks they are capable of the job, HR sends them to be interviewed by the person they will actually work for. Make sense?

(in reply to myotherself)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Looking for a second - 11/30/2011 11:59:59 PM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		I get where you're coming from LL, but my concern would be why the Master is sitting back and not getting majorly involved in the search for someone who is, after all, going to serve him.

At one point I was considering poly (although not any more), and I lost count of the number of subs/slaves who approached me to be their Master's third. I got massively irritated having to develop a relationship with a man through a third party. I agree it's extremely important to have all the subs/slaves get on well with each other, so for that reason I applaud the OP for her honesty.

For me, I was trying to develop a relationship with people and the whole screening/interview seemed cold, and that turned me off the whole idea of poly. Just my 2cents

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


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Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 12:04:42 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		This is a "girl bait" type of thingie that tennds to rub people the wrong way. I do think it's good for a chick to be innvolved if they're trying to build a relationship, but the Superior Officer kinnnda needs to be involve, too. Sennding a girl trotting out to bring another back like a tub of butter... eh...

I'm not poly, but I have been approached by couples and I hate the "anyone will do so why not you?" attitude that some of them give off.
If you just want a casual fling, OP, which is what it sounds like (re: his "fantasy" of being served by two slaves), then you need to be clear about that. Are you seeking a sexually adventurous chick for roleplay, or an actual additional M/s relationship?
Either way, the other girl has to feel that there's something there for her. The "self-cleaninng sex toy" feeling a lot of "thirds" get from couples is real and tends to turn them off really quick. If her needs aren't going to be met here besides playing and fulfilling a fantasy and earning you some "good slave points," then you both have to give her the option to fulfill her own needs in other ways.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to LafayetteLady)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 12:18:02 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		And I agree with myo; trying to form a relationship by proxy is bananas... if he wants the second girl, it just seems like he'd take the lead (leading is good, and a lot of chicks like men who are driven and go for what they want), and get involved in making that happen.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 1:31:04 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant

Hello All
I've been on this site for a while and have cruised the forums and participated in a few good laughs, also made alot of friends on here but this time I am actually in need of something.

I finally got collared and owned, by a REAL Master, who I have met and served in real time so this isn't some online faux game.

After serving My Master he has asked me to find a second slave to serve him with me.
At the moment he just wants another toy to play with, to fullfill his fantasy of being served by two slaves, which I am more than happy to try and do for him. If Master wants something I will do my best to get it for him, and this is one of those things.

I am looking for a slave who is in my area and get to know as a good friend before asking her to travel down with me to serve, i want to have a connection with this slave because I am very protective of my Master and I want him to have the best. meaning I want someone who (like me) does what they are told and does it happily because they know it makes Master happy.
sorry if I am rambling lol

Anyways, if anyone is interested in getting to know me and possibly go to adelaide with me to serve my Master please drop me a line


Expect some flak here, because most would see this all too familiar theme as a relationship red flag.

Some (like myself) tend to think that if this "master" is really up for running a stable of sub/slaves, then you'd think he had the charisma and charm etc, to get them himself. You know, to actually *lead* by example...!

What he's really doing (by default) is likely setting up his sole new slave to fail. It's hard enough to find one compatible partner in this lifestyle (looks like you hadta go 1500k's), so have either of you considered the prospects of finding two? Have you considered that many a sub won't wanna share, or be second in the pecking order? And how would you feel if she relegated you to number 2? You think M/s overrides natural human attraction and jealousies?

I appreciate you wanting to please him, but there comes a time when you need to ask yourself how far is too far. If he asked you to top him, for eg, would you? Geeezus, he's barely collared you and already you're not enough for him???? His "fantasy" amounts to immaturity - hold on for the coming train wreck.

And then look closer to home.... ;)

Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 2:52:51 AM   
Suleiman


Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004
Status: offline 		I have never been sworn to monogamy in my life, and the community I was a part of when I came of age was and is very polyamorous (I hate that word, but Otter & Morning Glory coined it to describe how they lived, and you've got to respect the words of the original unicorn tenders). What the OP has described is a recipe for disaster. I have seen poly households fall apart from the stresses caused by exactly this sort of thing. This is a badness. If the OP and mister DomlyDom met here on CM, then he ought to know his way around the site as well. Like others have said, he needs to put his own ass on the line as well.

_____________________________

Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.

(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 3:13:16 AM   
stellauk


Posts: 1360
Status: offline 		Yeah, right..

Sorry if it seems that I'm pissing on someone else's happiness, but..

I'm mono but would also describe myself as 'polycurious'. I'm not against it, just sceptical, because my own experiences of coming in as a third have mainly been coming into a situation which isn't going to work out because the relationship between the two is either so weak or fragile I feel I'm walking on eggshells.

It's not so much the Master isn't doing the seeking himself, it's also that he doesn't seem to have made any attempt to reassure the OP and the only objective is his fantasy fulfillment.

How many fantasies deliver on their promise in reality?

Any potential is going to be looking at the words and paying attention.

One of the giveaways is in the statement 'I finally got collared and owned'.. This is something I've noticed among some women. It's this tendency to throw all sense of responsibility into the relationship as if it's the relationship that validates them as a person. God forbid the relationship falls apart, because in some cases the woman blames the relationship rather than looking within and this is what sets up a cycle of dubious relationships to either mask or compensate something which they feel is lacking in themselves. It's almost as if getting collared and owned is an achievement in itself with any Master who will accept them.

From the perspective of a third I'm picking up on this and wondering how this is going to impact on my relationship with both.

Then there's the 'REAL' (note capitalized).. what is the purpose of that inclusion? Is it compensation for something which is missing?

Or is this the idealization of the person? You know? You get it from people who tell you that they have found their 'one' after two months but.. erm.. six months later the relationship either isn't so cool or just doesn't exist.

Then we come to what is more important - the decisions (and actions) taken.

The decision to seek someone over distance makes another statement. Why not local? Is relocation expected? Or is an LDR acceptable? What about if it doesn't work out?

Just to become someone's toy to play with?

Here from the perspective of a third I'd be asking, what's wrong with just hiring an escort or call girl?

You see, standing in his shoes, as a Master, with that fantasy, if I really cared about my first slave, that would be my next step.

That saying I hope it all works out, both the relationship and the fantasy, despite the odds which appear stacked against them.



_____________________________

Usually when you have all the answers for something nobody is interested in listening.

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 3:19:41 AM   
lilmissdefiant


Posts: 666
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline 		Thanks everyone for the advice.

Makes it harder but it makes sense



_____________________________

Change what you can and accept what you can't.
He came to me one night. Explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! When satisfied, he left & I was hurt!!... Fu*king mosquito!

Resident Thread Killer

(in reply to Suleiman)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 3:53:16 AM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline 		I do not believe in sharing and this poly thing where it is sister love , no way
I have major problems with it, one i do not share a darn thing with my twin!
LOL we have this problems of submissive wanting to serve her and me!  This master
should be out looking for this new girl himself!  She wants to be friend with
the second woman, women do not always come in with ' i will share him with you"
it is a cut thoart world for women!  It will not be easy and she may not be jealous but the new
one may want her out, op i am saying this will happen but please choose carefully!

i wish you luck in your search

mons

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 6:54:34 AM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		I see your point as well. The whole concept of "interviewing" for a relationship to me is ridiculous, even if it is often just a matter of semantics.

In the long run it would seem as though perhaps this is something the two of them should do together, so that each is sure their "needs" about it are met.

(in reply to myotherself)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 6:55:51 AM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Suleiman

I have never been sworn to monogamy in my life, and the community I was a part of when I came of age was and is very polyamorous (I hate that word, but Otter & Morning Glory coined it to describe how they lived, and you've got to respect the words of the original unicorn tenders). What the OP has described is a recipe for disaster. I have seen poly households fall apart from the stresses caused by exactly this sort of thing. This is a badness. If the OP and mister DomlyDom met here on CM, then he ought to know his way around the site as well. Like others have said, he needs to put his own ass on the line as well.


I'm not really sure if you are referring to CM members, but the term "poly" certainly wasn't coined in the BDSM realm. It has gone side by side with Bigamy for a very long time.

(in reply to Suleiman)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 7:17:15 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		So he wants two women for the night, we get it. Is sex work legal in Australia? Because if so, that's your answer. Decide what you want done and have him hire someone.

Because I'm sure you have many vanilla friends who you like while at the same time disliking the kinds of guys they pick. So why would you assume that making a kinky friend means you would automatically go for the same kind of guy?


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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 8:22:04 AM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		Littlemissdefiant,
First, you're OP sounds like an ad for a third. Ads belong on the other side in your PROFILE, not in the forums. Actually, why isn't there anything in your profile about the fact that you're looking? That's the way the search function here works. They look for the ones who are looking for them. Now that that's out of the way....

I would not be impressed with someone who could not look for his own slave but sends his girl out to search instead. Doesn't this prospective slave need to have a relationship with him and serve him, so why isn't he looking? Sending someone else to do his work for him just makes him look lazy, whether he is or not.

Also, since he's not checking these gals out for himself, it makes him look like he's got an "any slave will do" attitude which is unattractive. Every girl(or guy) wants to feel special you know. Or is he just looking for "any slave?" Because, if he is, that won't impress the gals either. And why would she travel to serve a total stranger she's never met, just because she knows you? That's asking an awful lot of her, to put herself in a possibly very dangerous situation. He may not be dangerous, but SHE doesn't know that. There are very real safety concerns for her in a situation like that.

Is he looking for someone to have an ongoing situation with, or just for a one-time fantasy fulfillment? A one-time thing is what your OP made it sound like so, if that's the case, prostitution is legal in certain states in Australia according the the search I just did. If it's legal in yours, couldn't you just find a prostitute for a one-time thing?

I realize I may sound mean and nasty, but I'm just blunt sometimes. The only time I'm REALLY mean & nasty is when someone wants me to be. lol

NBMG

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I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 8:34:58 AM   
DomMeinCT


Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		I concur with the response Myotherself gave you: 

Who is your master and why don't you disclose that in your post so that someone seeing it who might be interested can go look at his profile and see what he says about himself (not just what you might say).

Given the more difficult task of finding a 3rd person for your relationship, I'd venture a guess that any even perceived lack of transparency of who the two of you are might drive people away.


_____________________________

The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~ Carl Jung

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 9:35:42 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

I see your point as well. The whole concept of "interviewing" for a relationship to me is ridiculous, even if it is often just a matter of semantics.

In the long run it would seem as though perhaps this is something the two of them should do together, so that each is sure their "needs" about it are met.


Yup, that seems like the best route to me too

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to LafayetteLady)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Looking for a second (Newcastle AU) - 12/1/2011 10:20:37 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		I see you've removed the "looking" part from your profile.

I don't think your journal entry will work for girl bait. Perhaps you should try joining some local BDSM groups and see if you can make a conenction that way.

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Looking for a second - 12/1/2011 10:22:10 AM   
MstrPBK


Posts: 573
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

I see your point as well. The whole concept of "interviewing" for a relationship to me is ridiculous, even if it is often just a matter of semantics.

In the long run it would seem as though perhaps this is something the two of them should do together, so that each is sure their "needs" about it are met.


So this poster does not believe in 'dating' before a more permanent relationship??

(in reply to LafayetteLady)
Profile   Post #: 20
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