RE: Dom's ?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Dom's ?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Dom's ?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Dom's ? - 12/28/2011 9:19:07 AM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

I have a firm motto of "Watch the feet, not the lips". Actions speak FAR louder than words. Talk is cheap, particularly over the internet where you don't have to look someone in the eye.

LOVE it!

(in reply to searching4mysir)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Dom's ? - 12/28/2011 5:36:42 PM

Lily315

Posts: 11
Joined: 10/6/2011
Status: offline

I love you guys. Thanks for all the support.
as for the after Christmas convo it seems as have a party on Sunday night.
and I have been given instruction on what to wear on my way out and certain thing i need to have done nothing i do not already do
clean shave fresh tips and toes. Skirt no undies on the flight out.

do not worry I will have a tube of superglue with me

(in reply to kalikshama)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Dom's ? - 12/28/2011 5:39:57 PM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Sweetie...I don't know if this matters to you, but if it does, do you know if this is a married man? Have you been to his home? Met his friends and family? Can you call him any time, day or night?
If this is not a priority to you, please forgive my questions. But if you want more than just a play session or two, I suggest treading carefully.
Have you even met him in person yet?

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to Lily315)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Dom's ? - 12/29/2011 7:24:32 AM

shemalegabrielle

Posts: 35
Joined: 12/11/2011
Status: offline

well if your a sub they need to know your tricks , but if they punish them right they wouldnt show less interest as they know they are winning .

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: Dom's ? - 12/29/2011 8:05:47 AM

searching4mysir

Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: shemalegabrielle

well if your a sub they need to know your tricks , but if they punish them right they wouldnt show less interest as they know they are winning .

WTF???? Are you sure you are replying to the same thread as everyone else?

(in reply to shemalegabrielle)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: Dom's ? - 12/29/2011 8:17:03 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: shemalegabrielle

well if your a sub they need to know your tricks , but if they punish them right they
wouldnt show less interest as they know they are winning .

Tricks? Are you offering to show her how to pull a potato chip out of her ass?

I'm trying to ascertain how this trick should be punished, or even how a potato chip is capable
of holding the interest of a dominant. Unless of course it's a Lays..cuz no one can eat just one.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to shemalegabrielle)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: Dom's ? - 12/29/2011 3:51:26 PM

Lily315

Posts: 11
Joined: 10/6/2011
Status: offline

Lmao. Maybe the trick is sit up and beg.

(in reply to poise)

Profile

Post #: 47

RE: Dom's ? - 1/1/2012 12:41:30 AM

Casteele

Posts: 655
Joined: 12/10/2011
From: Near Sacramento, California, USA
Status: offline

Had to go back and re-read the first page.. "Do Dom's show lots of interest in a sub and then as time goes on show less." Then a bunch of posts jumping to various conclusions based on almost zero information about the situation, only a simple question about a very general situation.

OP: Without details about how and why you feel he is less interested in you, I can only answer you in an equally generic sense. In general, losing interest as time goes by is a bad thing, showing he's not that in to you. But I do not like saying that because for all I know, it could be something more mundane; Most relationships, vanilla or kink, tend to start off like a roller coaster with highs and lows, but eventually tend to level out as familiarity grows. I've seen many people mistake this for "losing interest" when all it really is "we've done all the wild and crazy shit, now we're settling in to the relationship." You can only jump out of so many airplanes before that, too, seems "less interesting."

I see so many people who base a relationship on the constant thrill of the new and exciting, which kind of ends up being.. at some point.. the only new and exciting thing left to do is find someone new and exciting to start over again. I'm not saying this is the case with you--You don't provide enough info. And it could be on either or both sides of the relationship.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Profile

Post #: 48

RE: Dom's ? - 1/1/2012 5:26:47 AM

Lily315

Posts: 11
Joined: 10/6/2011
Status: offline

Casteele

Thank You for you honest opinion This time next week i will know much more I am flying out to meet him face to face next friday

(in reply to Casteele)

Profile

Post #: 49

RE: Dom's ? - 1/1/2012 6:56:25 AM

MercTech

Posts: 3706
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline

Consider the new relationship energy trap..... to give it from a guy point of view....

You meet this really nifty person and you seem to connect. You delve into common interests and spend a lot of time getting to know this person and having a lot of fun with them.

At some point, you realize that you have fallen behind in your own personal things in life. The mechanics of life have fallen by the wayside... the truck needs an oil change... that improvement job on the house has been put on hold too long... your buds are asking here you have been. So you spend less time with the girl and spend time working on mundane considerations.

Here comes the trap... does she become clingy and in a panic because you are spending less time with her? Too much of a panic cling and drama will send the message that you are not someone a person can maintain a life around and will suck up a fellow's energy and time like a black hole.

There has to be balance in a relationship, yes even a BDSM relationship. The dishes still need to be done, the laundry taken care of. And there are vanilla interests to pursue.

If he doesn't spend as much time on you as he did at first, ask if he is needing to take care of other things and accept that you will have to share his time with the mundane considerations of life.

(in reply to Lily315)

Profile

Post #: 50

RE: Dom's ? - 1/1/2012 12:37:05 PM

Casteele

Posts: 655
Joined: 12/10/2011
From: Near Sacramento, California, USA
Status: offline

Some very good observations, Merc, some of which I've not even consciously thought of before. At least not in the way you presented. Although I do not get the "clingy" feel from Lily's posts, more the "confused and reaching out to others for support" feel, which seems to be a normal stage at some point in just about every serious relationship I've ever seen. Those initial sparks and fireworks settle down and then you start to wonder "Is this person really the right one? Are they really the exciting person I think they are, or was it all just the 'newness' of getting to know someone new? Will I still feel this way or that way in a year?" Various people respond to those thoughts in different ways, too. For example, I tend to withdraw a little.. I simply need some time to myself to sort out my thoughts and all, but I've learned to be communicative of that as it can often give wrong or mixed signals to the other person. So if you need to deal with the mundane issues of life (if anyone knows any creditors that would happily wait for your romantic life to settle down before demanding you pay the bills, let me know!), try to let the other know so they don't feel like they've been abandoned in the dark.. unless that's their kink, then by all means..

(in reply to MercTech)

Profile

Post #: 51

RE: Dom's ? - 1/8/2012 10:30:55 AM

Lily315

Posts: 11
Joined: 10/6/2011
Status: offline

Hi guys
I am out in Arizona who the Dom
And things are fantastic here.
He is everything I thought and more.

(in reply to Lily315)

Profile

Post #: 52

RE: Dom's ? - 1/8/2012 11:22:11 AM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline

That's great, thanks for the update! Hope things work out for you.

(in reply to Lily315)

Profile

Post #: 53

RE: Dom's ? - 1/8/2012 1:34:31 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

Fabulous Lily! Glad to hear your having a good time! May the fun continue!

(in reply to Lily315)

Profile

Post #: 54

RE: Dom's ? - 1/10/2012 7:48:59 PM

SadoNihilist

Posts: 5
Joined: 1/10/2012
From: MIDDLETOWN, Ohio
Status: offline

I myself grow bored with people easily & quickly. Then again, it depends on the individual, too.

< Message edited by SadoNihilist -- 1/10/2012 7:50:00 PM >

_____________________________

"It is always by way of pain one arrives at pleasure."
- Marquis de Sade

(in reply to Lily315)

Profile

Post #: 55

RE: Dom's ? - 1/11/2012 2:24:56 PM

Lily315

Posts: 11
Joined: 10/6/2011
Status: offline

Ok back home

Things went well between us. Not much play more getting to know one another and lots of time together.

A gar as a future together that remains to be seen,

but well worth the trip.

Lily

(in reply to SadoNihilist)

Profile

Post #: 56

RE: Dom's ? - 1/11/2012 3:05:28 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

Thanks for the update!

Hey, did you go to his house? Did he explain why he'd cooled off a few weeks earlier?

(in reply to Lily315)

Profile

Post #: 57