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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/29/2011 1:09:58 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5169
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From: Montana
Status: offline 		If you feel the need to punish there are many ways to punish a masochist. Does she buy a latte in the morning? Forbid her to do that for 2 weeks. Take away TV time. Take away computer time. Make her go to bed at 8 pm every night for 2 weeks. Punishments do NOT have to be of the corporal type.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/29/2011 4:06:51 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		Punishment does not have to be physically painful. You could withhold something she loved for X period of time. I used to have a sub that absolutely loved to be in his CB6000. For so-called punishment - I only had to do this ONCE - I took the chastity OFF him and didn't put it back on for two days. He HATED it and complained loudly about it. And he never F'ed up that way again. See? I really CAN be mean.

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< Message edited by NiceButMeanGirl -- 12/29/2011 4:07:27 PM >

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 8:13:25 AM   
LeatherWorkerCa


Posts: 4
Joined: 12/19/2011
Status: offline 		I have a rather simple overview of the matter; Good girls get spankings and bad girls get corner time.  I have used things such as removal of privileges, writing essays/lines and orgasm denial as punishments as well.  Although, I do find it more important to figure out why they are disobeying first.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 8:34:32 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		I've been punished twice in the last 2 years.  Both punishments were creatively suited toward what I did wrong, so that a lesson or meaning could come from it.  Both punishments were also followed by a spanking.  Now I'm a woman who loves a good spanking, but when he's unhappy with me, he could tap me with a feather and it would hurt.  Spankings take on much different meaning when not done in fun.

I never understood the "you can't punish a masochist" mindset, but that's because I relate it to my own reactions.

But really, when I've blown it, the best response he has is when he addresses why I blew it, what brought me to that place, the impact it had on the relationship, and how to avoid it from happening again.


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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 10:02:14 AM   
MarcEsadrian


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Masterimpulse
[I] have a slave that is a masochist[.] now When she disobeys, [I] very well cant spank her or anything [like that,] so may [I] get some advice on some creative ways to punish her?


You will find that physical masochist does not mean "impervious to pain." It simply means the individual is capable of transferring pain into something pleasurable, under certain conditions and contexts. Some masochists, for instance, won't find pleasure in pain when it's not being given as an intimate "play time" ritual, but is instead meted out due to anger or disappointment. Every masochist has a pain they cannot bear or reroute easily, however. Outside of the use of drugs, no human being can transfer all combinations of suffering into something desired. It's just a matter of finding what form of suffering they wish to avoid.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 10:13:41 AM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Masterimpulse

Hello ive recently gotten into the world of bdsm but ive been learning about it for two years and i have a slave that is a masochist, now when she disobeys i very well cant spank her or anything so may i get some advice on some creative ways to punish her?
Also any other advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks.



Easy. Seriously, did you have to ask? Really? I assume you've known her for a bit (I admit I'm assuming a lot for this forum), just do something she doesn't like. See, it's not like it's rocket science.

I swear.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 10:39:10 AM   
LordNMasterGrey


Posts: 42
Joined: 11/29/2011
Status: offline 		Use "Corner Time".. Having her stand face into the corner of the room.. No physical punishment, and very irritating! Works wonders! Add some variations to it to customize it to your need!

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 10:47:52 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LordNMasterGrey

Use "Corner Time".. Having her stand face into the corner of the room.. No physical punishment, and very irritating! Works wonders! Add some variations to it to customize it to your need!


Works wonders for some, not all.  I like corner time.  It gives me some peace and quiet and a chance to play around in my own head.  Then again, I enjoy my own company so I appreciate the alone time.

The point is, know your slave!  How any stranger on the internet can decide what will appropriate affect your slave is a mystery to me.  Know what's in her head, and what motivates her.  Then go from there.


< Message edited by NuevaVida -- 12/30/2011 10:48:57 AM >

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 11:43:57 AM   
SimplyMichael


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quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

Become a man she wishes to obey. Not very creative, but it has been known to work.


Wut duh dame der said.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 12:17:46 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		I am not big on punishment, but it has the rare use and sometimes showing them that you can fuck with them however and whenever you wish can remind them of what a pervert you are.

You have to disallow them the ability to process the pain into from "bad" pain to "good". This isn't exactly a "one size fits all" thing, you actually have to understand the person you are with. Makes it tricker for some people. Which is why for some, simply telling them you are disapointed will do the trick, for others, you have to get more creative..


  • Ice her ass down then cane her, the cold will change the perception of the pain.

  • Drag paper betwen her toes and rub cyanne pepper in the paper cuts, THAT pain will screw with her ability to process the punishment pain.

  • Christmas music...but only if you are a serious sadist.

  • Sometimes it simply takes throwing her over your knee, yanking her panties down, getting her all ready to spank, then telling her exactly how disapointed you are in her, explaining how this is going to hurt you more than her, and then...just pushing her off your lap and go do something else....


But that's the idea, throw them off balance, upset their ability to get ahead of the pain, and trust me, you can "hurt" a masochist.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/30/2011 2:51:08 PM   
SexyThoughts


Posts: 180
Joined: 7/14/2011
Status: offline 		Think of the big picture

If you want to punish a masochist, stop funishing her.

Women know more about how to seduce you than they'll let on, plus they're crueler than men. Make the hassle of creatively punishing her in ways that turn you on, her problem. She'll surprise you, with what she thinks is sexy.

Remember, if you want to consensually enslave some someone, set them free.
If they come back they're yours. If they don't, you're a crap dom.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 12/31/2011 9:51:46 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/2/2012 12:06:07 PM   
BootyBoy


Posts: 108
Joined: 7/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MikeSojourner

Second, just because she's a masochist doesn't mean that a physical punishment wouldn't work -- A lot of time there is a huge difference just because of the intent.  Spanking for play may be received completely different than spanking because she has disappointed you.



Very true. I have no problem taking floggings, or even caning as part of play, but I once made a mistake with a Mistress - she immediately became angry and told me that what I said was punishable in her book. The punishment was that I was to cut a good solid switch from a tree and I would be beaten with the switch as my punishment. So no big deal right? Hey, I've been switched before, so it's not really a punishment. WRONG!

1) She immediately cut off all verbal communication with me and emails were only allowed from her to me.
2) I got several emails expressing her disappointment and fury. I was not allowed to apologize or explain myself.
3) I was finally given an appointment to be punished after several weeks of complete silence.

When I showed up, there were no smiles and I could say very little. But what was really a revelation was that for the first time I realized how skilled most Dominants actually have to be. I hadn't realized how much Dominants have to prepare you and warm a sub up, physically and mentally to take a flogging. Being switched without the nicety preparation REALLY HURTS quite differently. It isn't any more dangerous, it just doesn't give you the chance of getting used to it slowly, and turning your mind on to it. Being thrashed hard, right off the bat while being scolded and shouted at is totally different than play.

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RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/2/2012 12:50:53 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

  • Ice her ass down then cane her, the cold will change the perception of the pain.

  • Drag paper betwen her toes and rub cyanne pepper in the paper cuts, THAT pain will screw with her ability to process the punishment pain.

  • Christmas music...but only if you are a serious sadist.

  • Sometimes it simply takes throwing her over your knee, yanking her panties down, getting her all ready to spank, then telling her exactly how disapointed you are in her, explaining how this is going to hurt you more than her, and then...just pushing her off your lap and go do something else....

    But that's the idea, throw them off balance, upset their ability to get ahead of the pain, and trust me, you can "hurt" a masochist.

    • You are such a sick puppy
    I commented mainly tho because the one time, I got flogged outside, it was really really windy, just above zero with a stingy flogger. About 40 feet off ground level
    That SOB made me safe out, and it stung for ages a three hour drive home... so I can completely agree with your first point!
    that was NOT fun, well the actual pain wasnt :)
    the christmas music is open for debate:) ... barney or blues clues music will make me safe word too. As a domme and a bottom

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    RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/2/2012 1:15:19 PM   
    MissImmortalPain


    Posts: 2440
    Joined: 4/1/2011
    Status: offline     		I'm a little late to this thread but I will go ahead and throw in my two cents. I had a slave that was a masochist awhile back. The thing I found that bothered her more than anything was watching me interact with others. Either being very kind to someone, or if I really wanted to upset her, being cruel to someone. Sit her down in a chair with a pad and pen have her, in extreme detail, write down what you are doing. And I do mean extreme detail..if she fucks it up make her write it again...and again...and I'm sure you get the point. If you can do it have her write down a session with someone else as it happen. Pay no attention to her, other than in the begining by telling her to write it down.

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    RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/5/2012 6:40:05 PM   
    toxic66


    Posts: 47
    Joined: 5/14/2004
    Status: offline
    quote:

    It seems to me that weak or new Doms use punishment instead of developing skills in leadership


    You are defining something for all cases that just is not true. My slave is a masochist, however I can still punish her physically. As someone else stated, I do it by making the strokes much harder, starting out hard and not building up, and no breaks. This makes the pain too much to process and is not pleasant. She does fear to be punished. And that is exactly what she needs and wants in our relationship. She is big on control and wants to be controlled through being help to account and punished. If that were not a part of the relationship she (and I) would not be satisfied.

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    RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/5/2012 7:19:54 PM   
    SlaveFinderDomme


    Posts: 2
    Joined: 11/11/2011
    Status: offline     		I take the time to know a slave so that I can give it a punishment I know it will HATE.  I prefer using mental rather than corporal punishments.  I give the slave a short lecture on what it did wrong.  Then I explain how disappointed I am.  Finally, I give a punishment that requires the slave to use time that would have been spent serving me in enjoyable ways.  When you know your slave you can tailor the punishment.  Force her to eat 3 meals a day of food she hates.  Put her into head phones listening to music she hates.  Shunning a slave for 24-48 hours can change behavior.  Its for the Owner to be creative. 

    I use pain for pleasure not punishment.  If you have a slave that requires physical punishment then something is wrong and you need to figure it out.  You can teach fear with pain but not obedience. 

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    RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/8/2012 3:19:49 AM   
    Buzzman


    Posts: 6
    Joined: 1/6/2012
    Status: offline     		I had a sub who made an effort to get into trouble so she could get punished by getting beaten, something that had worked with her ex's, but with me I was one the wiser. She got a very big bottom lip because I was onto her tricks. If she was naighty I'd simply make her do something she did not like doing, so I guess you need to think, what is it my slave hates doing?

    I remember once, she liked getting put in her place in public so she tried to put on a show to get put in place, but instead I started acting all whimpy towards her and praising her, etc, something she hated. The moment she stopped I stopped. It was funny on my side because even though I was trying to teach her something, the expression on her face was just too funny to control myself.

    I just want to add, ( perhaps I'm going off your the original topic of this thread but I feel compelled  to add this ), punish a slave when she deserves to be punished and reward her when she deserves to be rewarded otherwise this may lead to confusion and a slave looking for the right attention in the wrong way.

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    RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/18/2012 5:58:37 AM   
    Domspaintoy


    Posts: 158
    Joined: 2/25/2007
    Status: offline
    quote:

    ORIGINAL: Masterimpulse

    Hello ive recently gotten into the world of bdsm but ive been learning about it for two years and i have a slave that is a masochist, now when she disobeys i very well cant spank her or anything so may i get some advice on some creative ways to punish her?
    Also any other advice would be greatly appreciated.
    Thanks.


    My ex Master had many canes, but He had one, a very whippy one was aptly named Mr Whippy and despite my being a masochist if (which was rare) i needed to be punished it was with Mr Whippy! I hated it because if i was caned with that one i knew i had seriously ticked Him off and aside from the pain being horrendous it was the mental pain i felt because He was seriously disappointed with me. That hurt more than any physical punishment.

    Dpt.

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    RE: Punishing a masochist? - 1/18/2012 6:06:49 AM   
    fucktoyprincess


    Posts: 2337
    Status: offline
    quote:

    ORIGINAL: littlewonder

    tell her no when she wants pain.

    Tell her how disappointed you are in her. Works every single time for me, then again I'm not a masochist and punishment is not fun to me.



    I have to say this is what works with me too - and I am a masochist.

    Have to say the cartoon posted by MasterSlaveLA also sums it up nicely....

    < Message edited by fucktoyprincess -- 1/18/2012 6:10:14 AM >

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