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RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 2:33:42 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

It seems to me that Eric emailed a lot of people. I was only one of them , but I am now wondering if he thanked everyone and told them they gave him great advice. I wonder this because I know what I told him does not match what some others have said but he seems to agree with everyone*confused look* If you bother to come back and read this Eric I still suggest you find out what it was about you that she found worthy of cheating. A realationship ending is never the fault of only one party, that is unless you got into a realationship with someone you knew was screwed up to begin with(than it is really only your own fault) I will also remind you about what I told you about breaking a horse. Ask a real cowboy it can take a very long to break a horse the "right way" I will also add one last time that the titles dom, top, owner, bottom, sub, mean nothing when it comes to how you deal with your personal life and your own well being.

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to FantasyKisses)

Post #: 41

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 2:34:20 PM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Perhaps he was just being polite?

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to MissImmortalPain)

Post #: 42

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 2:36:25 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

Well I guess it's nice if he was...but I don't really need anyone emailing me to tell me I was right if they think I'm wrong. I would rather hear someones honest opinion than have them pat my ego.

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

Post #: 43

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 3:06:56 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

why is this posted twice in the SAME fora?
just askin

Fora......multiple forums?

(I like that....fora....)

Did you make that up?

(I need to read more).

I'll be over ---------------------> with books and such.

fora forum
data datum
dicta dictum

opera uhhhhhhhhhh opus.

Fuck!!! Never mind...(lol, but yeah, its right)

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 44

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 4:56:59 PM

FantasyKisses

Posts: 69
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain

It seems to me that Eric emailed a lot of people. I was only one of them , but I am now wondering if he thanked everyone and told them they gave him great advice. I wonder this because I know what I told him does not match what some others have said but he seems to agree with everyone*confused look* If you bother to come back and read this Eric I still suggest you find out what it was about you that she found worthy of cheating. A realationship ending is never the fault of only one party, that is unless you got into a realationship with someone you knew was screwed up to begin with(than it is really only your own fault) I will also remind you about what I told you about breaking a horse. Ask a real cowboy it can take a very long to break a horse the "right way" I will also add one last time that the titles dom, top, owner, bottom, sub, mean nothing when it comes to how you deal with your personal life and your own well being.

Actually Ma'am, I have to disagree with you. It is not always the fault of the cheated that their supposedly lover cheats.

Sometimes people are just assholes and take advantage of the person they're with. I've seen it firsthand and had to be the one who uncomfortably lost BOTH friends by bringing it to light. The cheater should be blamed because they're making a really messed up decision. Not just by cheating, but by possibly exposing their partner to an STD without that partner's knowledge, much less consent.

Is any relationship perfect? No, every type, whether Lifestyle, mainstream, or familial, takes work. Some people feel that regardless of how worth it that relationship might be, the work is just too much. Surely you've experienced this in one form or another? Even by proxy of friends?

My ex cheated on me, because of circumstances being what they were, he got away with it for a time. And after I kicked him to the curb, I found out from his exs that this was habitual. I've met guys in the local scene that claim to be Doms but use it to justify cheating on their mainstream wives....

So your definition is very narrow Ma'am, with respect to your station. And it's very hard. I really hope no one who's been cheated on will read your words and take them to heart, because you make assumptions without knowing everyone's story.

At any rate, Eric, Sir, take some down time hon. There's a reason I've been celibate for eight months. . . Find the right one, invest time into your next relationship before taking it anywhere physical. Actually, other than my plans that were already in place to move from Maine, that's one of the reasons I'm looking out of state for my Life Mate.

Go slow. If she's worth it, she'll respect you more for it.

(in reply to MissImmortalPain)

Post #: 45

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 5:14:40 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

Okay, what station are you talking about? Do you mean the fact that I call myself a domme? Wasn't it you that brought up all the stuff abut the "community"? If so what happened to that old line about someone being a dom but not your dom. I don't care what title I tag myself with I am not your dom so don't give me any respect unless you are either being shallowly polite(which I can live without) or I have in your opinion earned it. If you give respect just because of a title you have no idea what real respect is(just my opinion of course) As for what I had to say about people cheating....reread what I said. I said it is never the fault of only one person. I did not say that it is always the fault of the person who got screwed over by the action. I defined nothing other than the fact that if a person chooses to get into a realationship with someone they ALREADY knew has problems than part of the fault is their when they have the same problems later. As for you saying I'm narrow(minded) I suggest you ask Eric what I had to say to him because what I told him was much like what you told him. Take time, talk to her, find out reason, do what you feel you must to be happy, etc.

< Message edited by MissImmortalPain -- 1/1/2012 5:22:17 PM >

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to FantasyKisses)

Post #: 46

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 5:18:35 PM

FantasyKisses

Posts: 69
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline

Hmmm? No Ma'am, I mean your belief that being cheated on is ultimately the fault of the one betrayed.

That's what it is, a betrayal of trust.

You have a very large chip on your shoulder Ma'am. Perhaps you should also remember that not everyone wears the mask of those who harmed you.... And that some people went through similar situations and just maybe, things you couldn't imagine.

I'm not here to get into a pissing contest. But you need some compassion. And if you can read my thoughts on being betrayed not being the fault of the one who was cheated on and take it as a personal attack against your dominant position, then you have some serious problems to work out with your ego--because it doesn't escape my notice that you spend a lot of time defending your status as a Domina without cause or provocation.

And while I'd rather explain this in PM, your posts cause me to say "with respect to your station" because I have none for you personally. But I have quite a bit for what you supposedly represent in your unique fashion. That's why I've tried to be polite. Thanks for extending that back to me.

Happy new year Ma'am, may you find peace. As for me, this conversation is over.

< Message edited by FantasyKisses -- 1/1/2012 5:22:42 PM >

(in reply to MissImmortalPain)

Post #: 47

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 5:26:01 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

I didn't take anything as an attack. Clear it up for me, what station are you talking about? And how did harm to me? I admit maybe I'm not getting what you are saying. You said I said it is the fault of the person cheated on...I didn't. You said you hope no one reads my narrow view...that seems like a personal attack. I need compassion for who(did you miss the part where I suggested putting the fear of god into a cheater? Please I'm not here to fight with you so explain it to me.

Edit(because you edited your post after I replied to you)...Okay you don't want to explain what I didn't understand from you...fine. I hope you find peace too. As for me I found it a long time ago.

< Message edited by MissImmortalPain -- 1/1/2012 5:31:23 PM >

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to FantasyKisses)

Post #: 48

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 5:39:07 PM

FantasyKisses

Posts: 69
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain

It seems to me that Eric emailed a lot of people. I was only one of them , but I am now wondering if he thanked everyone and told them they gave him great advice. I wonder this because I know what I told him does not match what some others have said but he seems to agree with everyone*confused look* If you bother to come back and read this Eric I still suggest you find out what it was about you that she found worthy of cheating. A realationship ending is never the fault of only one party, that is unless you got into a realationship with someone you knew was screwed up to begin with(than it is really only your own fault) I will also remind you about what I told you about breaking a horse. Ask a real cowboy it can take a very long to break a horse the "right way" I will also add one last time that the titles dom, top, owner, bottom, sub, mean nothing when it comes to how you deal with your personal life and your own well being.

That is what I have a huge issue with.

I just turned down an offer to train a slave for One who used excuses like "I married a vanilla woman" to cheat on his wife--and it's suddenly her fault??? By your logic, yes.

This man was cheated on by his slave, and it's his fault? ..... Obviously there were signs of something going on--he figured it out and stopped it. And while I don't know the situation from both sides, I'm not willing to jump to blaming him since he corrected the situation and since I've known quite a few people who entered a relationship with the intent of ...sleeping with... (oi!) as many other people as possible.

You don't know what you're speaking of broad-based. And that was messed up. You also called my faith and love and trust in my former partner a bad thing, or me an idiot or worthy of being cheated on. I've read more than a few of your posts, plus your journal and your profile--you haven't even read my complete profile because of an error on CM....

Yet you're judging me? Him? Good and worthy people I've known because they got cheated on? Seriously Ma'am????

(in reply to MissImmortalPain)

Post #: 49

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 5:41:48 PM

FantasyKisses

Posts: 69
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline

Glass houses and stones Ma'am.... Glass houses and stones... I do hope you find peace. May I suggest T'ai Chi? Yoga works well too. Then again, there's a good ole mosh pit if you like metal and punk.

(in reply to FantasyKisses)

Post #: 50

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 5:47:22 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

I thought the conversation was over for you. But seeing as again you quoted me...you notice how I said his name? I did that because of what was emailed back and forth between he and I. I expected no one but him to understand it, or respond to it. May I suggest while you do your yoga that you chat.... Not everything is about me or my realationships. Oh sorry that was rude but you have me laughing now. *inner peace, inner peace* It's cool, we don't have to agree. Still wish happiness for you.

*edit* Can not laugh and spell at the same time, sorry if I made that hard to read.

< Message edited by MissImmortalPain -- 1/1/2012 5:48:10 PM >

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to FantasyKisses)

Post #: 51

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 5:53:08 PM

searching4mysir

Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FantasyKisses

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain

It seems to me that Eric emailed a lot of people. I was only one of them , but I am now wondering if he thanked everyone and told them they gave him great advice. I wonder this because I know what I told him does not match what some others have said but he seems to agree with everyone*confused look* If you bother to come back and read this Eric I still suggest you find out what it was about you that she found worthy of cheating. A realationship ending is never the fault of only one party, that is unless you got into a realationship with someone you knew was screwed up to begin with(than it is really only your own fault) I will also remind you about what I told you about breaking a horse. Ask a real cowboy it can take a very long to break a horse the "right way" I will also add one last time that the titles dom, top, owner, bottom, sub, mean nothing when it comes to how you deal with your personal life and your own well being.

That is what I have a huge issue with.

I just turned down an offer to train a slave for One who used excuses like "I married a vanilla woman" to cheat on his wife--and it's suddenly her fault??? By your logic, yes.

This man was cheated on by his slave, and it's his fault? ..... Obviously there were signs of something going on--he figured it out and stopped it. And while I don't know the situation from both sides, I'm not willing to jump to blaming him since he corrected the situation and since I've known quite a few people who entered a relationship with the intent of ...sleeping with... (oi!) as many other people as possible.

You don't know what you're speaking of broad-based. And that was messed up. You also called my faith and love and trust in my former partner a bad thing, or me an idiot or worthy of being cheated on. I've read more than a few of your posts, plus your journal and your profile--you haven't even read my complete profile because of an error on CM....

Yet you're judging me? Him? Good and worthy people I've known because they got cheated on? Seriously Ma'am????

FK,

People do not generally cheat if they are getting their needs met and communication has not broken down.

Yes, the person cheating is primarily responsible, and I don't think MIP would disagree with that. The vanilla woman with the kinky husband are not talking to each other about their needs and working together to make sure both are fulfilled in their relationship. Does this give him the right to go outside their marriage behind her back? Of course not, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't have a part in it, albeit a small one.

We teach the people around us how to treat us through what we will and will not tolerate.

(in reply to FantasyKisses)

Post #: 52

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 6:12:19 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain
It seems to me that Eric emailed a lot of people.

I got a really nice letter too. :)

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to MissImmortalPain)

Post #: 53

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 7:10:00 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

Searching....I love you for using these words.

quote:

primarily responsible

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to searching4mysir)

Post #: 54

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 10:13:17 PM

Casteele

Posts: 655
Joined: 12/10/2011
From: Near Sacramento, California, USA
Status: offline

*hands out Hershey's Kisses, or whips and floggers, or whatever, grabs everyone's hand and starts singing "Kumbaya"*

(in reply to MissImmortalPain)

Post #: 55

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/1/2012 11:31:26 PM

tj444

Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain
It seems to me that Eric emailed a lot of people.

I got a really nice letter too. :)

He emailed me but it was only to answer my first question, if he had verified that she actually did cheat.. that was all.. no big deal other than i dont check my email very often..

_____________________________

As Anderson Cooper said “If he (Trump) took a dump on his desk, you would defend it”

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)

Post #: 56

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/2/2012 8:08:44 AM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

And yes it was a real relationship (not cyber) and yes I verified it the other dom knows.

I have moved on he will deal with her however. As far as I am concerned she is figuratively curbside trash awaiting pickup and on her way to the landfill.

Yes, sounds like she was cheating on him with you and broke up with you by confessing that she was owned. I'm sorry you got hurt but am glad it happened fairly early on.

(in reply to ericdaddy)

Post #: 57

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/2/2012 4:22:00 PM

climax2

Posts: 10
Joined: 8/5/2011
Status: offline

I realize that this is not a funny topic; but I will say based on the amount of DOMS that I have email me, it doesn't surprise me. I am not saying this to be harsh or funny, but sometimes you will have several DOMS at the same time that seem attentive, and then suddenly, they are gone--vacation, etc, with no care or concern for you. I have seen such a difference in characteristics in available DOMS it is incredible. Not everyone suits or is a match, and though it may have been three months, how much time have you really spent with her, and how well do you really know her? D/S is not like marriage.....

So, no, it is not surprising at all, that you may have been competing with another DOM. It is possible that something happened in the relationship to change it. Just a thought.....Princess Vixen

(in reply to ericdaddy)

Post #: 58

RE: Dishonest Submissive - 1/2/2012 8:11:30 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

FK, I have to say I'm totally confused by your post. According to the op, he's been chatting to some woman for a while and then gets an email from some guy who claims he's in a relationship with this woman. He didn't bother to ask her if it was true, just accepted what the strange guy wrote.

You ever heard of the word stalker? Because for all we know, this could be the situation. The op never said he met her in person, in fact he went out of his way to not respond to that despite the fact that the preponderance of posters asked that question. To me, it means he didn't and doesn't want to admit it.

And I'm sorry, but just because you've friended someone on facebook it doesn't make them someone you would lend your car to. There are friends and friends and I hope for your sake you know the difference. In the same way, someone you've never met isn't the same as someone you're married to.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to climax2)

Post #: 59

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