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Howdy - 1/3/2012 8:09:08 AM

kystray

Posts: 2
Joined: 10/31/2011
Status: offline

KY Boy here - A bit.. timid, I guess is the word. See, I do know what I desire - but I have trouble even admitting it to myself sometimes. The level of depravity that I crave is sometimes frightening. I'm not so interested in the bondage, sadism or masochism. But I am definitely attracted to domination and humiliation. The depravity I mentioned has to do with raunch fetishes. Also, though I do crave this deeply dark sexual relationship, there's also a part of me that craves tenderness and respect. I haven't yet gotten comfortable with my own desires to imagine that these two traits might coexist in a relationship. But I believe it to be possible, and so I am doing all that I can to openly admit my desires - all of them - to myself and find self-acceptance, that I might one day be able to find an appropriate relationship that fulfills these desires.

Whew, I feel like I just made a confession at a 12-step meeting! So, that's my story. Glad to have a space where I feel safe enough to share it with other human creatures.

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RE: Howdy - 1/3/2012 8:15:15 AM

BossyShoeBitch

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

Good first post Ky! Yes, those two traits can definitely coexist in a relationship.

Welcome to the forums and good luck in your search!

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to kystray)

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RE: Howdy - 1/3/2012 8:18:28 AM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline

Well hey...nothing wrong with taking things slowly and getting used to them before diving in deeper. I think something important to keep in mind is to know what you want, which you do! Then make sure you don't compromise on that while you search. Sadly enough it never works in the end not to be true to yourself. So have fun and good luck with things!!

(in reply to kystray)

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RE: Howdy - 1/3/2012 1:01:32 PM

ashjor911

Posts: 7793
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: balcony, having a Smoke
Status: offline

Welcome

_____________________________

"operative" working undercover for the federal government of bangladesh.

my name is : bonsh ... jamesh bonsh.
code name : 009.5
licensed to give formla

(in reply to kystray)

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RE: Howdy - 1/3/2012 5:14:27 PM

Casteele

Posts: 655
Joined: 12/10/2011
From: Near Sacramento, California, USA
Status: offline

Welcome to CM, KY. Looks like you are starting out on the right foot here.

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RE: Howdy - 1/3/2012 6:31:04 PM

kystray

Posts: 2
Joined: 10/31/2011
Status: offline

Thank you everyone for the warm welcomes! I'm keeping a journal on my CM profile, so feel free to check in if you're interested in how my exploration progresses

(in reply to Casteele)

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RE: Howdy - 1/4/2012 3:39:16 AM

OohAahMrs

Posts: 7723
Joined: 7/14/2010
Status: offline

Hey there ky, you're on your way! (you know what i mean)

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You may choc the choc.........Oh forget it......

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