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Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 6:12:24 AM   
nashsub4fun


Posts: 20
Joined: 8/13/2011
Status: offline 		In the vanilla world, degration and humiliation are synonymous but in the lifestyle is there a difference? Degration seems so negative and disrespectful. But when my Master wants to humiliate me, i do not feel demeaned or degraded like i would have in the vanilla world.

Your thoughts?
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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 6:39:08 AM   
Fornica


Posts: 2986
Status: offline 		It all comes down to what you agree to in your own dynamic. *shrug*

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 6:53:52 AM   
Ninebelowzero


Posts: 3134
Joined: 8/5/2011
Status: offline 		Everytime I've tried it humiliation has ended up in a fit of laughter. it doesn't work with me (so far)

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 7:37:20 AM   
DominantHunger


Posts: 57
Joined: 5/11/2009
Status: offline 		Personally I see humiliation as being severe embarrassment while degradation attacks the person's feeling of self-worth. I love to humiliate a submissive but I don't care for degradation.

(in reply to nashsub4fun)
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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 7:38:59 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I always say that I am not into humilation play, but everyone has such differing ideas of what's humiliating. If you are enjoying it, don't worry about the words.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 7:42:49 AM   
Ninebelowzero


Posts: 3134
Joined: 8/5/2011
Status: offline 		That I do understand Hibby

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 7:45:31 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		It has to involve laughter, too, for reasons too complex to tell here.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 7:52:23 AM   
Ninebelowzero


Posts: 3134
Joined: 8/5/2011
Status: offline 		I get you 100%

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More come backs than Frank Sinatra

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 8:04:35 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I know it! Wanna be in my harem?

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 8:43:01 AM   
Ninebelowzero


Posts: 3134
Joined: 8/5/2011
Status: offline 		PMSL Hibby I would make an exception in your case.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 9:58:27 AM   
BootyBoy


Posts: 108
Joined: 7/29/2008
Status: offline 		I think "Humiliation" is generally a question of getting into a subs headspace. For many submissives, especially to those who are newer to the lifestyle, even an over-the-knee spanking may seem quite humiliating initially—that is to say that, it is embarrassing, and makes them feel vulnerable. That feeling of embarrassment probably won't last for very long with their Dominant partner. But Dominant creatively in keeping the edge of that feeling sharp and cutting by engaging different methods and scenarios is the Art of humiliation. Degradation is more of a specialty kink, enjoyed by a considerably more narrow band D/s adherents. Probably the most familiar scenario is the male submissive who likes having his penis size insulted. In cases where both parties agree to this degradation, it works. However, in general the practice of insulting and constantly running down a person goes counter to the basic tenets of "relationship" and so must be utilized advisedly with some caution.

In short: Humiliation is probably something that every D/s relationship utilizes at some point (no matter how mildly) but Degradation is more of a specialty—a kind of ego and esteem torture engaged in specifically by those with that particular kink.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 10:06:28 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I think it is all a matter of perspective; one person's humiliation is another's form of degradation.


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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 10:10:40 AM   
HisPet21


Posts: 395
Status: offline
quote:

Personally I see humiliation as being severe embarrassment while degradation attacks the person's feeling of self-worth. I love to humiliate a submissive but I don't care for degradation.


Very well put.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 11:07:18 AM   
Winterapple


Posts: 1343
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline 		It's a bit like the supreme court justice who's
definition of obscenity was I know it when I
see it.
What is degrading to some would only be
mildly humiliating to others, humiliating
to some would produce giddy giggles
in others.
We can only know what we respond to,
desire and are willing to accept. You
don't always know those things til you've
had a taste of them. So you need trust,
respect and communication. But you need
that in all relationships in regards to
everything.






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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 11:10:02 AM   
Winterapple


Posts: 1343
Joined: 8/19/2011
Status: offline 		Ack, can't edit.
Not who's but whose.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 11:23:25 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Degradation is making her eat your cum from her ass-humiliation is having her beg for the privilege :-)

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 11:35:44 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Dang, that gal is some flexible!

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 2:31:46 PM   
RaspberryLemon


Posts: 422
Joined: 7/18/2011
Status: offline 		I have always thought of humiliation and degradation as the same thing, even if just to different degrees. My Master and I don't do/enjoy either, by most anyone's definitions of the words. I also don't think embarrassment and humiliation are necessarily the same thing, although embarrassment can be humiliating in some cases.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 3:10:49 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nashsub4fun

In the vanilla world, degration and humiliation are synonymous but in the lifestyle is there a difference? Degration seems so negative and disrespectful. But when my Master wants to humiliate me, i do not feel demeaned or degraded like i would have in the vanilla world.

Your thoughts?


These two things pop up pretty often on the boards as they seem to be more of a love it/hate it kind of thing with not much gray in between. Also it's really personal to each couple if they pursue it and how- lots of strong feelings on all sides. I can't really offer much clarification as my Dom and I have tried some things and liked them, and others not so much.

In my opinion there should be a solid base of trust between you  in order to pull it off successfully. I'd have to agree, that in our successes, I never felt demeaned or degraded, but I did feel valued, and actually pretty awesome. Like I was doing or being something meaningful for him which is what flips my switches as a submissive. The stuff that didnt' work was more of I felt like a failure to him, and to myself- I'm the type that does not like to fail, so that part just didn't work for us and we had some tears to deal with but no biggie.

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RE: Degration and Humiliation - 1/8/2012 10:10:23 PM   
gungadin09


Posts: 3232
Joined: 3/19/2010
Status: offline 		The words mean the same thing to me.

pam

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