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LadyPact -> RE: Welcome to Collar Me (1/18/2012 9:12:07 AM)
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Ok. Whew! I finally caught up and read the whole thing. There was some confusion there in the middle. (Well, a number of different confusions.) Still, I didn't want to anybody to think that I didn't address points when I said I would. It's a bit of a monumental task at this point. For anybody reading who is sick of the subject, you might want to skip this one because of length.
Before I do that, I'm going to thank everyone who contributed here. I also want to thank those who sent emails. Whether you agreed or disagreed, I appreciate both equally. Views got expressed on the topic (and others) and that's why the thread was created. One person said they didn't know if their comment was worthwhile at one point. That isn't the case.
Obviously, the timing on this one could have been better. The stuff that came here from other threads probably couldn't have been avoided. Some different topics got mixed in but there were still a lot of people interested in this one. I did it Myself at one point and I probably shouldn't have done that.
I did make other mistakes on this thread, too. One, the presentation could have been much better. Also, a couple of My replies earlier didn't specify when I meant the difference between "you" as a person and "you" meaning general you. When I went back and read the thread start to finish, the chronological order of the posts made that error glaringly apparent. I apologize for that.
For addressing comments, I am going to stick the this topic. I'm attempting to do so without going into other issues too much. That's not entirely easy because even though this is about the Intro section, it's part of the same site. There are different guidelines for different sections and that means a response that would be fine in other sections might not be acceptable in Intros.
This ties into the comments about varied moderation. If there are different expectations in various sections, that almost has to be true. Too often, I think there is an underlying implication that it's more about the "who" rather than the "where". The Mods dealt with all of the other questions about that topic (thank you Alpha and TwentyOne) so any additional opinions I have can be done privately.
A few folks asked where is the line. I'm going to go with that there are actually three lines. Those are the site's lines, the starting line, and the personal line. They go in that order, too. The site's lines, of course, are TOS and the guidelines. The starting line is the fact that it's a new poster in Introductions. The personal line is each person's decision about can they do that.
I don't have a good answer for the personal ad/professional ad question. I went and looked at the guidelines for both of those sections. I didn't see anything that indicated it was an either/or deal. The guidelines on the Pro board are a lot stricter about what can and can't be included, it does specifically say "This section has been made available for professional Dominants/submissives (and related services) to post a single link to their respective websites." Maybe that's why somebody mentioning they are a pro or a fin domme doesn't automatically make it a professional ad
Even though it was withdrawn, I am going to answer the question of why I didn't defend a particular poster on an old thread. The quick answer is there were way different issues than the Intro section. If I've got the right thread, here's the list: The topic was regarding what is listed on a person's profile, not an Intro. Half of the thread was about nasty remarks made in another thread. Five months on the forum isn't "new". That's long past a person's first shot.
Last thing to address. Yes, I completely understand that some people only play with folks *if* they share common interests for during non play time. I've never argued anybody's boundaries about what's included for who they play with. (Advice when asked for.)
It's not all like that. Some casual play partners are that and nothing more. They play and then don't see each other until next time. Meet and beats are just as legitimate and I've done plenty of those in clubs. I've gone to events where I've played with folks that I'll never see again and loved the hell out of it. Negotiate the scene, after care, and boundaries for play. That's part of BDSM, too. If that's true, it means it also qualifies for an introduction on a kink site.
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