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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/1/2009 9:36:11 PM   
Fitznicely


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/18/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAnimus

My favorite emails start with a respectful address like, "Hey cunt" and continue to inquire about my personal well being in the form of "When is the last time you had a big dick shoved up your ass?" In case I haven't given into reckless abandon yet I am gently beckoned to continue our correspondence with "Send me some pics of you naked. If I like them I will let you dance nude on your webcam for me."

Be still my heart.


(And to think most men would think women wouldn't like that!  Go figure).



They don't? Crap! That's why I've got no replies yet...<headslap>

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/1/2009 9:38:11 PM   
subinlife


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omg good thread, too funny.

(in reply to NCSilverWolves)
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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/1/2009 10:36:27 PM   
EmelineRose


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Joined: 5/12/2009
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When I saw this heading, "best email tactic ever" I couldn't help but think, wow, someone's being polite!  I guess it's a sad indictment that of the plethora of emails which hit my box the ones which stand out do so for 2 simple reasons:

1. They are polite and use their manners.
2. They address you as - gee whiz! - a human being.

Guess this is a sad commentary on the rest of them.

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)
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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 12:47:44 AM   
xXMasterXx


Posts: 42
Joined: 12/14/2005
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I just ask in a nice way if they would like to chat...call it a 1 liner or whatever I don't care...I'm just being polite like if we met on the street

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 4:57:42 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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xX, do you normally go up to strange women in the street and ask them if they want to chat? And if so, what kind of success rate do you get? I'm guessing about the same as you get here.

Honestly, that usually doesn't get the best response. Better is to read her profile and write a short reply based on shared nonkink interests. If you're both into alt music, ask if she knows of your favorite local band or some such. You want to start as friends.

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 5:03:19 AM   
Asherdelampyr


Posts: 9556
Joined: 11/14/2006
From: The Desert
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I dont get fun emails anymore, used to get at least 3 a week from teenage girls asking me to "turn" them, or to make them my slave, as in Renfield. They were peppered with the usual butchery of what I can only assume was meant to be some form of Old English. it was even worse for a few weeks after that thrice damned "Twilight" movie came out

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 6:17:43 AM   
GYPZYQUEEN


Posts: 730
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**I've had..

these are INITIAL..1st contact messages..

"I could come to your city every TH...for 2 hours."( no indication fo reading profile..no intro..nothing).
" You into..........?
" SO..u like to Dominate?"
" Go to yahoo................"
"You got msn?"
" I want to submit to you totally"
"Want to come to Egypt..all expenses paid?"
"U lookin fer a sub?"
" You like em young?"

***and these ones after I try (if I feel like playing)..to ask about
how they will enhance my life...or serve..
 
"Well you like to do strap on don't ya?"
" You can enhance mine"
"Bitch"
"Well you get to dominate"
" Well you get my virgin ass"
" You could make me go with another guy"


GQ




(in reply to Asherdelampyr)
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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 6:43:17 AM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
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~Fast Reply~
Oooh, this is such a funny thread, even though it's way old!

i am sooooo glad i'm not looking anymore!  i've gotten all sorts of e-mails.  i won't post them in their entirety though, as i see that always gets deleted.  These are initial e-mails.  lol

1.  The "On your knees, bitch" kind.
2.  "Hello" and nothing else.  i'll answer "Hi" and nothing else.
3.  "Your search is over.  I am your perfect Dom."  Oh, really?
4.  The "You will <insert sex act here> for me upon meeting," or "Do you <insert
   sex act here>?" or "Have you ever <insert sex act here>?"  i answer "You'll
   never know, You rude jerk" and block & delete.
5.  "35 male Dom" and nothing else.
6.  One Dom even sent me the exact same form letter twice, only a few weeks
   apart.
7.  One Domme sent me "Hi.  you're beautiful.  Are you a model?  i'd like to be
   your friend."  New & gullible, i was curious & replied.  She turned out to be
   a nut.  No One i've ever seen on the boards.  Long after that i changed my
   profile name due to complaints in my inbox about the name......she found
   me again and sent the exact same e-mail to me again.  This time i was wise
   to Her.  lol
8.  The "What are you into?" kind.
9.  "I love you."
10.  Then there are those that insist in the first couple letters on making me a
    slave without limits, when i clearly let them them know "slave is too
    extreme for me, and i have limits that will be respected."  The block &
    delete buttons are my friends. 
11.  The kind where the Dom insists on calling me "cunt" in every sentence. 
    Excuse me?  i sure as hell don't think so.....You don't even know me.  That
    sure as hell doesn't fly.
12.  NOW, every once in awhile i still get letters from Doms wanting to hook
    up, when i clearly say in my profile i am owned & collared.  So i changed
    my main pic to the new one with me wearing Sir's collar, in case They don't
    read.  Still i get letters wanting hook-ups, to which i say "i must decline as
    i am owned & collared.  Oh, and i will forward Your letter to Sir for
    His consideration."  lmao

There is no end to the letters.  lmao  Annoying sometimes, yes, but just good clean entertainment. 

edited for spacing.

< Message edited by sweetsub1957 -- 6/2/2009 6:45:06 AM >


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Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 7:18:05 AM   
Apocalypso


Posts: 1104
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I just send out Smiths lyrics.  No woman can resist the power of the Mozza.


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Don't keep calling it the "Book of Revelations",
There's no "s", it's the Book of Revelation,
As revealed to Saint John the Divine.

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 7:32:35 AM   
SomethingCatchy


Posts: 796
Joined: 7/29/2008
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I got an email from a male 'slave' that basically went against my profile. He obviously didn't read the part in red way at the top about how I'm not looking anymore. I told him I was in a relationship and not interested, but good luck. He wrote back with something like 'so do you want to have sex?' and I blocked him. He then went to another profile and sent me an email saying 'You bitch, you can't block me! I say when this conversation is over and it isn't!' So I blocked him again.

Real submissive that one... I should have snatched him up. Any woman would be proud to have such a shine example of stupidity. *cough*

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 7:35:48 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
I love the ones that email me and say stuff like "I loved your profile and think we'd be a great match"..

My response to those runs along the lines of " Well since it seems that you missed the part..AT THE TOP OF MY PROFILE.. in HUGE, BRIGHT COLORS that says I'm MARRIED, why dont you ask my husband if HE thinks you and I would be a great match"


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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 7:59:54 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14444
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
My profile consists of 5 words: Just here for the forums.

I get, "I loved your profile". Really? Which of those FIVE words did you love the most?

But, I did get one day before yesterday that again ignored my statement and sent me, "Be my slut".

I amazed at the number of guys that think my profile reads: "Just here for the forums unless you think you're the exception".

*sick and grumpy this morning*

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 8:02:47 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
The first two words of my profile: Happily Married!!

I keep getting "Are you involved with anyone?" c-mails


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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 8:31:22 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
so, Holly... you involved with anyone??  

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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Profile   Post #: 114
RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 8:58:04 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
I've said it before, but I frikkin love trolls.  They make my life soooo much easier.  I just think "antitroll" when I write an intro letter to a woman.  It's magic.  Just do what they don't, and don't what they do.

Write more than one line and less than 10.  Mention one specific thing about her profile.  Mention one thing about my vanilla interests.  Say nothing sexual.  Ask her a question about herself.

It's "easy."

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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to GreedyTop)
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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 9:08:06 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

I love the ones that email me and say stuff like "I loved your profile and think we'd be a great match"..

My response to those runs along the lines of " Well since it seems that you missed the part..AT THE TOP OF MY PROFILE.. in HUGE, BRIGHT COLORS that says I'm MARRIED, why dont you ask my husband if HE thinks you and I would be a great match"



I still maintain we'da been good together.

*sobs*


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~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


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Profile   Post #: 116
RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 9:13:14 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
Christine.. if you ask Pirate nicely, we might be able to arrange something ;)

*tacklesmooch*


_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 9:34:03 AM   
marysdream


Posts: 126
Joined: 5/31/2008
Status: offline
to all of us on here, regardless of gender that have experienced this and worse! i was thinking the next time some self pleasuring jerk off wants to hear a fantasy...i would say mmmm yes i do have such an erotic one.....me as a submissive watching the naked jerk offs! being forced out from behind the protection of their computers, naked and having to walk up to a complete stranger and ask her what her fantasy is! wow how sexy this would be right?....ree smiles the evil one!

Stay strong they will disappear, the smarter we get!
take care
ree

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)
Profile   Post #: 118
RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 10:09:48 AM   
CarrieO


Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

I've said it before, but I frikkin love trolls.  They make my life soooo much easier.  I just think "antitroll" when I write an intro letter to a woman.  It's magic.  Just do what they don't, and don't what they do.

Write more than one line and less than 10.  Mention one specific thing about her profile.  Mention one thing about my vanilla interests.  Say nothing sexual.  Ask her a question about herself.

It's "easy."


It's easy but it's not always simple...or maybe it's too simple for the simpletons!!!

Great post, btw.

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RE: The Best E-mail tactics ever.... *eye roll* - 6/2/2009 6:26:32 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

xX, do you normally go up to strange women in the street and ask them if they want to chat?


I actually just start typing on their breasts....

"Hello, how are you....excuse me....are those your breasts?  Sorry....I must type now....".

(I'm really trying hard to get this whole "texting" thing dialed in....but I'm willing to fail....)

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 120
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