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RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 2:15:15 PM

NyxPontia

Posts: 224
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lemmony2

thast a lot of dodged bullets... they asy cats have nine lives..lmao...

quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

You're 23 and have five ex-fiances?

quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

Also.. Five.

Yes. In my defense, I never proposed.

Then this pussy's got four more to go!

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Post #: 61

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 2:18:35 PM

Epytropos

Posts: 699
Joined: 7/23/2011
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If you don't mind my asking, how exactly does that happen? That's 1 per year every year since age of majority...

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Post #: 62

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 2:18:45 PM

Ninebelowzero

Posts: 3134
Joined: 8/5/2011
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I just got to thinking. The Godfather got it wrong. I would like to wake up with this horses head in my bed.

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Post #: 63

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 2:28:30 PM

Kaliko

Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

You're 23 and have five ex-fiances?

quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

Also.. Five.

Yes. In my defense, I never proposed.

You said yes five times? I'm just trying to understand...how is it that you have found "the one" five times at the age of 23 and I can't even find someone to go to the movies with?

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Post #: 64

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 2:50:17 PM

NyxPontia

Posts: 224
Joined: 1/8/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko

quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

You're 23 and have five ex-fiances?

quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

Also.. Five.

Yes. In my defense, I never proposed.

You said yes five times? I'm just trying to understand...how is it that you have found "the one" five times at the age of 23 and I can't even find someone to go to the movies with?

I'll be 24 this year. Geeze. D:

Let me sum up. The first was my first girlfriend, and W/we all know how first loves go. Then there were two long distance and the distance ended up being the breaker for them, not me. Another was a girlfriend who proposed after about four months in the middle of my work place, with everyone watching.. so yes, I said yes.. but gave the ring back two weeks later because it was moving too fast. And the last was my last ex, but after a year of living together and bad fights, it was over and done with.

The two long distance lasted one year, and the other was two. The first love was about nine months.

Be glad, Kaliko. With the exception of the one I turned down, they got cold feet (and one cheated on me, which I found out after we split up). It's a mess.

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Post #: 65

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 4:52:56 PM

hlen5

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Joined: 3/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

whoa..story please?

I didn't see the emails, but he sent two after our (next to the last!) break-up. The first told the pastor and family how much he enjoyed their company and would miss them in his life. The second email to the Pastor (at least) was sent under the guise of concern for what I was "getting into". I didn't see the letters but heard about them.

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Post #: 66

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 5:40:43 PM

Fornica

Posts: 2986
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Oh yes. It's not gossip if it's a "prayer request" ;)

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Post #: 67

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 5:49:07 PM

ShibsStories

Posts: 132
Joined: 1/2/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

You're 23 and have five ex-fiances?

quote:

ORIGINAL: NyxPontia

Also.. Five.

Yes. In my defense, I never proposed.

Damn. Only 2 proposals I ever got were for a greencard and a tax break. Both got a NO.

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Post #: 68

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/21/2012 7:51:20 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

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Sometimes someone could come hunt you up on sites like this just to start shit and not because they're kinky or belong here in any sense of the word, but then the question is, how'd they know about the site if they were just some shit stir'er in your life. or a random. True.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Delilya

Besides, what were they doing here to have run across me anyways?

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Post #: 69

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/22/2012 3:18:28 AM

iowaswitcher

Posts: 16
Joined: 7/4/2011
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no i have never really had any kind of scare being on this site yet. no one from work has recognized it, at least to my knowledge, and i don't expect any of my family finding out either.

i live in iowa, which sucks, and my family is not into any of this. i don't mind if work finds out since it wouldn't impact my job there as long as i don't get involved with anyone there.

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Post #: 70

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/22/2012 8:44:54 AM

RexDarcy

Posts: 597
Joined: 6/23/2010
From: Arizona
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I'm getting in on this thread late, but I have had one "Oh shit" moment. The last D/s relationship I was in, we had a couples profile here.

About a week after I put the profile up, a guy I worked with mentioned that he saw the couples profile. It wasn't mentioned again and as far as I know, he never mentioned to anyone else that he saw the profile here.

I don't have issues with people knowing about the lifestyle I live but it caught Me .off guard that somebody I worked with approached Me about it.

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Post #: 71

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/22/2012 11:12:25 AM

MSubEdinburgh29

Posts: 29
Joined: 1/3/2012
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I've been wrestling with the idea of adding a photo to my profile since joining, but I doubt I will be doing so for a while.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

I'm not ashamed of my lifestyle choices. If someone wants to clutch their pearls about it, have at it.

Nor am I, but the sad thing is that people will pre-judge you

Which is fine, you might say - they can think what they want to think.. but as Deliliahdelight says:

quote:

ORIGINAL: delilahdelight

I wish the above wasn't a response to this type question. I am not ashamed of my lifestyle choices. However, there are people in my world, one of whom happens to be my employer, that wouldn't even begin to try and understand why I live the way I live. That is their right, just as my kink is mine. However, because doing otherwise would negatively affect some friends, some family, and my ability to support myself, I remain anonymous. It doesn't make me less "real", just needful of serious discretion. It would be great if everyone was accepted for exactly who and what they are, but it's not that advanced where I live and exist. Yet. One can hope.

The thing is, people will pre-judge you, and it's a whole lot worse when they revert to stereotypes and make assumptions.

I wouldn't want my employers to know about my lifestyle, for example, because if they disapproved - then I may be discriminated against. It's all very well saying "they can't do that", but the fact is these things do happen.

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX

I could give a shit who sees me on here -----> and my question to them would be What are you doing here?

That's also true..

quote:

ORIGINAL: stellauk

Thing is, it's your life, you make the choices and decisions over how you live your life, society and other people aren't responsible for the choices you make, you are.

While you make a very good point, unfortunately, this isn't entirely true

You can shape and influence your life to a certain degree, but others will hold you back. Discrimination of all types happens all the time - whether that be sexism, racism, ageism, nepotism.

For example, people employed in powerful positions need their image and reputation to be seen as such, and if they just happen to be sexually submissive and it gets out - it could well ruin them.

< Message edited by MSubEdinburgh29 -- 1/22/2012 11:14:00 AM >

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RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/23/2012 11:26:42 AM

ScatteredRose

Posts: 171
Joined: 3/9/2010
From: New Orleans
Status: offline

Back when I first started out, I was petrified. Granted I work selling video games, so I hardly wouldn't have any reason to lose my job...

Only thing that scared me, which was there before I joined CM, was when I would work alone. I am always cautious at that point.
There have been people to recognize me. Only three. All harmless. Or I hope they are anyway.
One was a guy who lived near my ex. In the bad part of New Orleans. Like, close to 9th Ward bad. I would walk from my exes house in the morning to catch the bus to go home. The person would see me everyday and even message me on CM about it.
It made me nervous, but one morning he drove up and offered me a ride. I looked him square in the eye and said, "No thank you. I don't need a ride". Granted yes, this is not intimidating talk, I held strong and made him know I wasn't a push over.
The other was a guy from OkCupid. I was in the line at Walmart and he was behind me and exclaimed, "Oh I know you! From OKCupid!"
Which the cashier, who is ironically one of my favorites and protective of me just gave him an evil eye and watched him closely. I looked back and said, "Okay."
And left it at that.

I've learned that if you just treat it like it's not a big deal, it won't be. Basically don't give them power and you won't get scared.
Now what gets me scared is when these big hulking guys come into my work and catch attitude with me...That's the scary feeling. Or worse, get in my face and slam their fists on the counter.

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RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/23/2012 12:38:05 PM

lostinmyownmind

Posts: 56
Joined: 8/31/2011
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This is why I don't post pictures on my profile and don't send them to anyone on the first contact. My private life is my business and I don't want some stranger walking up to me in the local Wal-mart and announcing where he has seen me. When I choose to share my picture, I will take that chance until then...no.

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RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/23/2012 2:02:17 PM

NyxPontia

Posts: 224
Joined: 1/8/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lostinmyownmind
My private life is my business and I don't want some stranger walking up to me in the local Wal-mart and announcing where he has seen me.

I would die laughing if that happened.

Stranger: You look familiar.
Me: I do? I don't think we've met.
Stranger: I swear I've seen you before. [pause. Then, at the top of lungs] Oh, I know! You're on collarme!
[Everyone turns and looks]
Me: Yeah? Well so are you!

I mean really, they announce it to the world, they kind of rat themselves out. Just sayin'.

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"Bleeding Is Believing, Bleeding Is Breathing." Natalie Imbruglia

A slave without a collar is just the mammal form of a chicken with it's head cut off.

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Post #: 75

RE: Ever have a scare? - 1/24/2012 8:05:26 PM

subcurious12

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Joined: 1/12/2012
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This is an interesting topic. I'm still pretty new and pretty paranoid. Far less so than when I started a few months ago on alt/FL but still not comfortable enough to post a picture. The first search I did on CM for doms in my area turned up two guys I know. I would never out anyone but it gave me pause that anyone could search profiles without even logging in. A jerk could easily ID a kinkster and subsequently fuck with them if they were so inclined without said kinkster having any idea of who it was---thus nullifying the whole 'you're here too' defense.

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Post #: 76