RE: I could really use a Master's advice.

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RE: I could really use a Master's advice. - 6/2/2006 7:35:26 PM

Bearlee

Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

The consequences will be what they will. If you want to know the major reason why I believe people, allegedly in a 'relationship', can sit in a room for hours at a time and prefer to watch a re-run on TV versus have a discussion with each other? It's because every time they get ready to open their mouth to initiate a conversation they consider all the lies of omission they are guilty of or have been victim. Resentment builds and, like cancer, kills. When people have to qualify their conversation within a relationship to consider whether what they say will end the relationship; the relationship will someday evolve to one where they sit in the dark, together but alone, watching TV reruns. Ironically each may be thinking to themselves "what happened?".

ahhhhhh yes, THIS part I get, Sir. And is, perhaps, why I'd rather chat a subject to death than wonder 'what he meant'. <sigh> I'm guilty, I think, of over-communication; I try too damn hard to get my point across. No...it's not necesary they have MY point of view; only that they understand it. Yanno?

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

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RE: I could really use a Master's advice. - 6/3/2006 2:18:37 AM

enigmabrat

Posts: 2383
Joined: 8/1/2004
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Im sorry to say this but I think maybe your a safety net. he knows he has you so if he cant find anyone els at least he know he still has you. He will do this as long as you let him. no matter what he has to say he has been leing to you and you should cut him lose!!! he isnt worth you and you cant trust him and trust here is so importnent

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(in reply to Mercnbeth)

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RE: I could really use a Master's advice. - 6/4/2006 5:49:23 PM

artglfr

Posts: 235
Joined: 4/8/2005
Status: offline

I am sorry you are getting hurt. Non consensual pain is just wrong as I am certain most of us believe.

Anyone can call theirself a MASTER or anything and this does NOT mean they are trustworthy or have any kind of a clue. It is really on YOU to trust how YOU feel when with this person. When he is not with you there is little you can do. He will be and do as he pleases.

If he makes you feel Good and you wish to stay then DISCUSS in person this situation and if he then isn't honest and forthcoming...YOUR heart will tell you what to do.

Good luck and I hope it all works out for you.

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(in reply to irishbynature)

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RE: I could really use a Master's advice. - 6/6/2006 11:59:21 PM

objectivist

Posts: 13
Joined: 8/26/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: irishbynature

Why can't he just say, "Yeah, I need more...move on, release, go..."???

That is a question that I fear has no answer. Because he (or in another case, she) could not explain their motivations if their lives depended on it. Worse, there is nothing to be done that can force a person to do the introspection needed to make their words more than gibberish. They are emotion junkies, and nothing can get in the way of the next fix.

So, if you have the strength, don't listen to their words, base your decisions on their actions and how their actions define them. If you don't have that strength, then you can look forward to being one of those couples that break up only to drift back togehter, each new breakup worse than the last. . . . For YEARS.
Nobody has EVER seen the situation improve. Ever. You aren't likely to be the first.
Of course, most keep bashng into each other, until there is nothing left. But, there is no rule that says you are required to do so. Run. Now. Very fast.

(in reply to irishbynature)

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Post #: 44