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Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 6:31:49 AM

MLskajira

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Master put His pet in the streachers and whipped her with the crop a couple of days ago(not as punishment, but as play). this girl is a bit stiff and sore still, but otherwise she is fine and holds no grudge against her Master for using her in the manner He desired.
apparently Master is feeling bad about the condition he left His pet in, (not that it is horrible, only colorful) she can tell by the tone in His voice when He calls to check up on her (Master does not live with His pet).
she would like to know if there are times when other Masters feel a little guilty about the condition They leave Their pets in and ask for advice as to how she could ease her Master's mind. she has already informed Him that she is fine and that she loves Him beyond all reason, she belongs to Him and He should not hesitate to use her in whatever manner He choses.
any input would be most appriciated, thank Y/you.
MLspet
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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 6:38:50 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Most sadists have a time of transition in becoming comfortable with themselves and wanting to hurt someone else.

Give it time and positive reinforcement. Heck, I'd ask him straight out- are you feeling guilty over this? Do you know why? And then reinforce that you really liked being there and able to have that experience and would really want to do it again.

After that, he's gotta do the work in himself. Either he reconciles it or not.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 6:43:44 AM

TolerableCruelty

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nope... no guilt here for bruising or otherwise...

of course.... all the girls I've played with are more of a masochist than I am a Sadist... so its usually having to deal with them staring in the mirror at the bruises and poking them....

then I'll get the "so... when can i get more, Master ??"

T.R.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 7:03:24 AM

MLskajira

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this girl is not a pain slut, but she does have a high tolerance for pain and she wears her brusises like badges, she is proud of them as they show that her Master cares enough about her to spend time with her.
it bothers her (and makes her smile) that Master is so concerened. He called this morning and told her He had a nightmare that because of how He left her, she refused to show Him the respect she has always shown. this girl's response was " Master, Your pet loves You and is here for You to use in whatever manner You wish, You have never done her severe or irreversable damage and she trust You implicitly".
W/we have been together for almost 2 years and this girl knows that He is compassionate and kind. now she just needs to convience Him that she still feels that way.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 7:16:08 AM

Sensualips

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Perhaps it is not guilt, but just his version of aftercare from what he considered an intense scene? I would just tell him what you said here - "she wears her brusises like badges, she is proud of them as they show that her Master cares enough about her to spend time with her." Based on the dream conversation he may need a little reassurance. You can give that, but then it is up to him.

I like a little bit of a fuss to be made over my bruises and marks and ask for it in an overt but joking manner. "It is time for the recognition, sympathy and concern now" accompanying either a visual inspection or photos. Then after a return email or sixty seconds of "awww, that looks nasty - does it hurt when I do this?" I tell him we are done with that portion of the aftercare now. (Hey, it works for me/us.)

< Message edited by Sensualips -- 6/1/2006 7:20:07 AM >

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 7:17:23 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MLskajira
now she just needs to convience Him that she still feels that way.

LOL like I told my partner last night- "I recognize that you have a lifetime of training towards NOT thinking about your own comfort, but eventually you will remember to get a pillow for yourself rather than laying uncomfortably. Until then, I'm happy to get you one and laugh at you for it."

He might always feel some twinge or need an extra bit of reminder- but as long as it doesn't prevent you both from doing what you really want, then it's not a big deal.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 7:21:40 AM

RavenMuse

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The thing that crosses my mind here is Dom drop! Rather than rehash the issue perhaps you could use the search function (Unless LA is kind enough to provide her usual excellent linkage)

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 7:25:06 AM

MistressOfGa

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Oh boy, Dom drop. How fun.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 12:03:18 PM

MLskajira

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she does not know "Dom drop". would someone please explain it to her? is it anything like what this girl feels sometimes after she has come back from sub space?

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 12:11:46 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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It's pretty much the same thing in that it's a drop off on happy chemicals/happy feelings leading to a depressed low.

But, like sub drop, doms experience it in a myriad of ways.

I'm not sure I'd put this completely on dom drop, but it might be a contributing factor.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 12:46:34 PM

MLskajira

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thank you LA, that information may help her make her Master feel better.
this girl does not wish Him to worry unnecessarily, she is here for His pleasure, and does not think worrying is pleasurable for Him.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 1:16:19 PM

LadyHugs

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Dear MLskajira, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I am a Sadist but, I also warm up my victims. So, stiff and sore are words of concern for me, as the muscles and tissues have perhaps been bruised due to lack of warm up. This happens so much to occassional players, as the body hasn't had a chance to 'leather' or to get use to the impact play and or intense play.

In addition, in this modern world of BDSM, the consensual pain is viewed differently from the person giving and one taking and, yet again differently viewed by the audience.

Dominants do a drop, as another poster mentioned and detailed well. When there is distance, its difficult to 'be there' in a loving, supportive and healing way of 'after care.'

I also realize, that slaves wear marks like "earned badges." Some, can't afford to be marked. At times, dominants are so 'self programed' not to make marks and or make marks, the transition is something of concern. It just is a matter of getting accustom to the slave.

I think you have a good Master, to have feelings over you and how your body reacts. Communication is the key and understanding each other's expectations.

Respectfully submitted,
Lady Hugs

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 2:33:46 PM

Emperor1956

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mlskajira said:

quote:

she would like to know if there are times when other Masters feel a little guilty about the condition They leave Their pets in

Not guilt. I don't ever feel guilty about beating my girl. Concern, yes, both with short term comfort (and how was that long drive home?) and with her overall happiness. It doesn't sound to Me like Dom drop (although I admit we have little information to go on) and it doesn't sound like your Master is uncomfortable with what He is (a much greater issue). It sounds to Me like the concern of a caring Master for his girl after a fairly intense (between you two) session. I too do not live with My girl, and in the few days after a session I am especially attentive to her physical comfort and her mood, with a lot of emails and phone contact. Tell him what you've told us, miss, and he should be happy.

I think on some level Dominants have a sneaky little voice in the back of their heads that whispers "some day he/she will wake up and realize that I'd be lost without him/her if she/he leaves Me" and so we are especially solicitious of our most prized possessions. But I'm an incurable romantic.

E.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 6:53:34 PM

xxmstrchasxx

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I don't have guilt but I always have concern for my sub.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 9:13:51 PM

MLskajira

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this girl DOES have a good Master. He has always been attentive to His pet, especially after a session, but she thinks she heard actual fear in His voice when He spoke to her about it this morning. she is stiff and sore, but no more than she would be after a strenuous workout.(o.k., maybe a little more).
He spent the entire night with His pet that night and took great care of her, but has not been able to make it back to her since then. W/we have only spoken on the phone and she has been telling Him that she is fine, but He insists that she go nowhere and do nothing all day for the last 2 days(she even got fussed at for washing the dishes today), which is 2 days off that this girl has needed, but she does not desire them if it causes her Master ANY distress. she is for His pleasure and distress of any kind is not pleasurable, so if her Master is worried over her, then she is not fulfilling her duties in pleasing Him.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/1/2006 9:24:32 PM

maybemaybenot

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MLskajira

she is for His pleasure and distress of any kind is not pleasurable, so if her Master is worried over her, then she is not fulfilling her duties in pleasing Him.

I dunno, seems like he is a decent, caring and concerned Master.

I find nothing troublesome about a Master or Dominant "worrying" or having concern for the welfare of his slave/sub. I also do not see the correlation between fulfilling my duties to please and he having re examined an occurance or his actions. I can please him and he not be pleased with himself. IMHO, they can be mutually exclusive.
mbmbn

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/2/2006 6:47:38 AM

Daddysredhead

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When my Master branded me the day of my collaring, He did so with all the confidence in the world as He was taught by someone years ago and has done branding on others. I was not scared to have it done, but a little anxious as to how it would feel afterwards. Master knows me well and took good care to call or stop by every day (for almost 3 weeks) and see my brandsite to make sure that it was healing the way it should. It made me feel extremely well looked after and cared for, which is just the way my Master is anyway.

I asked my Master about your question posed here, MLskajira, and He stated that perhaps it is a mixture of all the things mentioned here. Maybe your Master is feeling a little uncomfortable about making you too "colorful" or sore, maybe He has a bit of Dom Drop, maybe He is thinking about how He can prevent repeating the situation, or many other different things. It seems certain that your Master is compassionate, while knowing His place of dominance, which (IMHO) makes Him a very lovely Master to have. Just love Him and be His caring kajira, and I am sure that He will come around.

Be well...

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/2/2006 6:55:56 AM

MyCaptainsPet

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All good points have been made already... but i'd like to add something...

Maybe he just wants to take care of you?? He is a man and i think, personally, on some level, they still need to be the ones to take care of everything..

Next time he calls concerned about it.. Just mention you'd like a hot fudge sundae with whipped cream.... would he mind getting it for you?? LMAO.. hey.. it's a win win right?? *smirks*

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/2/2006 12:22:47 PM

MLskajira

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this girl has learned a lot from everyone who has answered this post.
she would like to say that she knows well of, and fully appriciates her Master's compassion. what was bothering her was the thought that He was worrying unduly, for His pet is perfectally fine. she is glad to know that the best way to comfort Him at this time is not to try to comfort Him and just enjoy the ride. *grins*
thank Y/you everyone for Y/your timely and sound advice.

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RE: Master's guilt - 6/3/2006 5:47:34 AM

bandit25

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You may need to chill a bit. If he wants to be concerned, let him. You've reassured him that you are all right. I'd go with the hot fudge sundae idea. Yum!

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