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D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:12:20 AM

payingoinker

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or normal fetish?

I am interested in your thoughts on this.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:14:06 AM

hangemhigh1953

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Hmm... Well I'm fairly certain it does not meet all the DSM criteria for mental illness, so no.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:18:54 AM

sincelo

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d/s can be a mental health issue if it causes you distress or ceases to allow you to function in everyday life.

Other than that d/s are characteristics that can be found in each relationship to some degree and here it is consensual agreed that one will take the lead in the relationship while the other will follow. I wouldn't call it a fetish at all really though if i guess i generally always take a more submissive role sexually. A fetish is correlated to an inanimate object or irrational commitment. I don't see d/s as being irrational ... do you?

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:23:59 AM

Lucylastic

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What is a NORMAL fetish?

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:34:40 AM

stef

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quote:

ORIGINAL: payingoinker

or normal fetish?

I am interested in your thoughts on this.

Boring troll is boring.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:37:02 AM

Hillwilliam

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quote:

ORIGINAL: payingoinker

or normal fetish?

Honestly, is there a such thing? By definition, a fetish is 'outside the norm' is it not?

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:39:06 AM

lizi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

quote:

ORIGINAL: payingoinker

or normal fetish?

I am interested in your thoughts on this.

Boring troll is boring.

Yeah. Reminds me of the goose guy with the piss poor communication skills and the endless threads where he never explained anything and responded in like one or two words all the time. Osf? Was that it? Something like that.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:39:20 AM

Lucylastic

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I didnt get an answer yet either...
i guess a fetish is normal until it becomes a paraphillia, ??
you know, selective definition?

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:42:38 AM

DominantHunger

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quote:

ORIGINAL: payingoinker

or normal fetish?

I am interested in your thoughts on this.

I believe - but do not have the any citable information - that interest in BDSM is no longer considered mental illness by the medical industry. Though I could be completely wrong on this. Personally, I don't care what the shrinks say - there is nothing inherently unhealthy with BDSM. It can become unhealthy when it is out of control - just like out of control eating is unhealthy. However, the mental health issue wouldn't be the BDSM. The issue would be whatever is causing the individual to lose control of their life.

"Normal fetish"? I don't think any fetish can really be considered normal, though abnormal does not equal bad. Is that what you were getting at?

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:51:42 AM

DominantHunger

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam
Honestly, is there a such thing? By definition, a fetish is 'outside the norm' is it not?

fetish
noun
1) an inanimate object worshiped for its supposed magical powers or because it is considered to be inhabited by a spirit.
2) a course of action to which one has an excessive and irrational commitment: he had a fetish for writing more opinions each year than any other justice.
3) a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc.: Victorian men developed fetishes focusing on feet, shoes, and boots.

I grabbed the definition because I wasn't sure if normality was relevant to the term. I thought it might just be the sexualizing of an otherwise non-sexual item. Though the definition does clearly establish the outside the norm requirement.

< Message edited by DominantHunger -- 1/29/2012 11:52:54 AM >

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My mind has wandered, the man just said so.
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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:51:50 AM

payingoinker

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Thank you for your perspective. I am interested in what people who are involved in the lifestyle think about this. Yes that is what I am getting at.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantHunger

quote:

ORIGINAL: payingoinker

or normal fetish?

I am interested in your thoughts on this.

I believe - but do not have the any citable information - that interest in BDSM is no longer considered mental illness by the medical industry. Though I could be completely wrong on this. Personally, I don't care what the shrinks say - there is nothing inherently unhealthy with BDSM. It can become unhealthy when it is out of control - just like out of control eating is unhealthy. However, the mental health issue wouldn't be the BDSM. The issue would be whatever is causing the individual to lose control of their life.

"Normal fetish"? I don't think any fetish can really be considered normal, though abnormal does not equal bad. Is that what you were getting at?

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:54:37 AM

payingoinker

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So then, do you think BDSM is normal?

I know others will raise that question "what is normal". I get that. No need to ask.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantHunger

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam
Honestly, is there a such thing? By definition, a fetish is 'outside the norm' is it not?

fetish
noun
1) an inanimate object worshiped for its supposed magical powers or because it is considered to be inhabited by a spirit.
2) a course of action to which one has an excessive and irrational commitment: he had a fetish for writing more opinions each year than any other justice.
3) a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc.: Victorian men developed fetishes focusing on feet, shoes, and boots.

I grabbed the definition because I wasn't sure if normality was relevant to the term. I thought it might just be the sexualizing of an otherwise non-sexual item. Though the definition does clearly establish the outside the norm requirement.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 11:56:48 AM

Lockit

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Personally, I think that wanting to give your money away to real or fake dominants, per your last thread, is rather crazy, but then I am no doctor. Wanting to pay or be a piggy, is all well and fine unless you struggle with it and then I would consider an emotional health situation might be going on depending on where that struggle took you. Like making multiple threads trying to sort it all out with a passive aggressive stance, posing as seeking information.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 12:02:04 PM

MissImmortalPain

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quote:

ORIGINAL: payingoinker

So then, do you think BDSM is normal?

It's normal on my planet...does that help.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 12:03:11 PM

payingoinker

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Thank you for Your thoughts. I will ponder some of the things you said.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Personally, I think that wanting to give your money away to real or fake dominants, per your last thread, is rather crazy, but then I am no doctor. Wanting to pay or be a piggy, is all well and fine unless you struggle with it and then I would consider an emotional health situation might be going on depending on where that struggle took you. Like making multiple threads trying to sort it all out with a passive aggressive stance, posing as seeking information.

quote:

Wanting to pay or be a piggy, is all well and fine unless you struggle with it and then I would consider an emotional health situation might be going on depending on where that struggle took you.

< Message edited by payingoinker -- 1/29/2012 12:05:46 PM >

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 12:04:27 PM

Lucylastic

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yah, I think Im done here. definition of normal now?
PUHLEEZE
i dont care if its normal, a fetish or a paraphillia, good bad, ugly or mindlblowing. its not going to make me feel guilty, happy, horny or pissed.
talking about my beliefs and the way I conduct m y sex life only happens when someone actually has an understanding of WIITWD.
Got a long way to go there Payingoinker

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 12:05:27 PM

payingoinker

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MissImmortalPain

If your planet is Earth...then yes it does matter. Then again if you are from Venus then it matters also.

< Message edited by payingoinker -- 1/29/2012 12:08:15 PM >

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 12:11:17 PM

MissImmortalPain

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I didn't ask if it mattered. I asked if it helped(you to know that on my planet it is normal) It seems the answer is yes it helps you. Yes it is normal. Yes this thread can end here.

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 12:14:59 PM

Lockit

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Dear Ms Lucylastic,

I love all the things you say and wish to pay close attention to them, but you always have these great ass pictures that distract me. What is most disturbing about this is that I'm straight! I feel a headache coming on and am wondering if my new-found struggle over the Ms Lucy ass pictures have become an unhealthy fetish for me and if I might have some self examination to do considering I like those ass's and I'm straight.

Thank you for confusing the fuck outta me and for adding to all I must do on this very busy day!

Insane Lockit

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RE: D/s = Mental health issue - 1/29/2012 12:15:16 PM

payingoinker

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I bet You my next paycheck that it won't end here...thanks for Your insight

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain

I didn't ask if it mattered. I asked if it helped(you to know that on my planet it is normal) It seems the answer is yes it helps you. Yes it is normal. Yes this thread can end here.

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