RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 2/26/2012 2:52:56 PM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: midmichiganguy

Not butthurt at all. Just providing a reality check. Ask yourself why these alleged dominants can have the time to post thousands of responses if they are so successful with life? Who has time to spend all day posting responses if you have obligations such as family, work, and life? *Shrugs* Then take a look around at the listing for female dominants in your state and see how many of them are scam artists with no positive future. Welcome to the online world. So if that makes me butthurt that I recognize the fact that the vast majority of online female dominants are worthless individuals in life and who have hidden agendas then so be it. Now off to do something actually productive with my day beyond haunting these silly boards like *GASP* finish my college paper on improper performance appraisal systems and adverse impact on protected status citizens. Then after that I am going to meet with the community volunteer HR presenters for sunday dinner while we discuss upcoming spring events.

Dude, honestly you're not making much sense. it's no secret that the Domme section of a kink site has a large proportion of women out to make a buck, they aren't lifestyle Dommes, they are scammers or fin Dommes. This thread was referencing lifestyle Dommes, you know, the ones who don't want money for their kink. In your first post on here you also seemed to referencing lifestyle Dommes, now in the second post you aren't. Of course there are women (or men posing as women) here that will take your money- there's a huge market it in and plenty of men willing to fork it over as their kink. It's no secret this exists, in fact its a legit kink that men seek out -hard as that is for you to imagine. There are no hidden agendas, they're very upfront about asking for money. If you wish to go that route then there are many avenues to go and many people who will take your money. Hell, there's a guy on here looking to do this and wanted hints.

If you wanted a lifestyle Domme however like the OP of this thread, then you have to offer something in yourself that is desirable to someone. You don't understand do you, that even if lifestyle Dommes are few and far between, which they are, that they also want a desirable partner. They won't be choosing the bitter or childish men to be saddled with but a cool, interesting guy who wants to truly submit. He is a good catch and they know it. There are some male posters on this board that Dommes would do their darndest to snag.

You come in here all pouty about the contingent of women out to make a buck, hell yes they're around, not sure why you thought THAT was a secret that you had to inform everyone about, but you're also not seeing that there are truly women here that want what a great guy can offer....himself. Not money, not a hot body, not providing them with things, but a decent partner who shoulders his part of the relationship. It's going to take work, it usually does when something is rare. Taking the route of complaining and whining does nothing but put you firmly in the undesirable category as does the OP with his adolescent snippiness.

I"m glad you got off to doing things in your regular life though, like the other posters here don't have one

I too am writing a college paper but have this site up on my computer for breaks. I could also throw out the topic in what I think is an impressive manner or post my business meeting schedule with our national organization because of course others would read that and think I was amazing

but I think I'll be more classy and just say I'm working hard.

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Post #: 21

RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/2/2012 5:37:53 PM

QueenRah

Posts: 380
Joined: 6/3/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: midmichiganguy

What do mistresses on here look for? LOL Look around! They look for people who have at least double their income. So that means you need to make at least 14.80 an hour or double whatever minimum wage is. You should also only have about 3 percent body fat in comparison to their 20 - 30 percent and you should be willing to work long unrewarding hours for them at whatever menial task they are too 'good' to do for themselves.<snip>

Bitter, much? Mom's basement gettin' lonely?

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/2/2012 5:46:37 PM

QueenRah

Posts: 380
Joined: 6/3/2005
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BTW - I think our OP "boy" is a "boi." Perhaps why (s)he appears too young. Too much softness on the cheekbones and jawline for a bio-male, I'm thinkin'. Not sure there's an adam's apple.

Perhaps one could chalk the snippiness up to youthful exhuberence and impatience smacked down, hard, by unwanted wisdom from the elders. We are good at checking them, when they just want free rein, ain't we?

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/2/2012 6:14:03 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Midmichiganguy likes to pop in now and then to remind us why he's single.

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Post #: 24

RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/2/2012 8:00:01 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TalkDominantToMe

I made appropriate adjustments to my original post. Happy?

I'm happy, but largely because I've had over 15 years of no payments to my ex (it really has nothing whatsoever to do with any changes you've made to your profile frankly).

(in reply to TalkDominantToMe)

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Post #: 25

RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/2/2012 9:35:13 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TalkDominantToMe

I made appropriate adjustments to my original post. Happy?

Yes, but it has nothing to do with how smart alecky you appear here, which will not help your odds in the least of finding a Domme.

quote:

ORIGINAL: midmichiganguy

Not butthurt at all. Just providing a reality check. Ask yourself why these alleged dominants can have the time to post thousands of responses if they are so successful with life? Who has time to spend all day posting responses if you have obligations such as family, work, and life? *Shrugs* Then take a look around at the listing for female dominants in your state and see how many of them are scam artists with no positive future. Welcome to the online world. So if that makes me butthurt that I recognize the fact that the vast majority of online female dominants are worthless individuals in life and who have hidden agendas then so be it. Now off to do something actually productive with my day beyond haunting these silly boards like *GASP* finish my college paper on improper performance appraisal systems and adverse impact on protected status citizens. Then after that I am going to meet with the community volunteer HR presenters for sunday dinner while we discuss upcoming spring events.

And once again, you remind us why your sourpuss ass is single.

NBMG

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/3/2012 2:37:37 PM

lostnlooking9

Posts: 42
Joined: 10/27/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama
You sub males have it easy. Fin doms are easy to spot. Married cheating men take much longer to out.

In support of all the Domme and women here against michiganguy, I agree.
We have it easy because spotting fakes is much MUCH easier.
But also harder because the fake subs and "slaves" pollute the water so much that we just get lost in the mess.

michiganguy look at the mirror and you will see the face of what causes your anger. guys.
men, males, us.

All these fake profiles and financial dommes and scammers are men. Ok well maybe 95% of the scammers and maybe 50% for the financial Dommes are. There is no reason why you should rant and rave about Any Domme when instead you should be ranting and raving about the stupidity and selfishness of men.

Yes they are easy to spot. But that is mostly because many of us are mindless cattle. See a pretty pic of a topless girl cut out of a magazine and our mind goes numb.

Beyond that.. take a step further back, turn 180 and apply your comments to the same to males or subs or maybe yourself. Fits just the same huh? Surprising. So you are implying from such looking that way that anyone online is fake and has no future. Like it or not the internet is the future. It is the now. and you are lashing out because you don't understand it and perhaps are intimidated by it. ALL of my best friends I have made online. Some of the best relationships ever have been forged online. And many of the people reading this will be in the same boat, position and understanding as I. You, however may not. This doesn't make you bad by any means. You just have a different perspective and view. your offensive and insulting words are wrong, but not the view you stand behind. It's just different.

As for Talk Dominant... My opinion as a sub to a sub.. be yourself. Be patient. and don't rush.
Don't expect the perfect Domme to find you this week, don't expect every Domme you message or who message you will like you or be your perfect one and talk to everyone like you would a friend.

This way you'll make friends and eventually one of those friends may become a Domme to you.

It's the best I can offer. I hope it's helpful. :)

(in reply to kalikshama)

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/3/2012 6:35:12 PM

DomMeinCT

Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lostnlooking9

But also harder because the fake subs and "slaves" pollute the water so much that we just get lost in the mess.

It's funny because I've seen that exact logic used by dominant men to explain why they can't connect with submissive women: too many fake and terrible doms confuse and confound us poor submissives.

That argument is actually kind of insulting, as if (in your example) the good submissive men can't be found by dominant women see because of all the bad ones get in the way. Do you really think the dominant women you seek are hampered by the fakes? No, most of them just move on, shake it off and don't whine about it.

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if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/3/2012 7:42:02 PM

lostnlooking9

Posts: 42
Joined: 10/27/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DomMeinCT

It's funny because I've seen that exact logic used by dominant men to explain why they can't connect with submissive women: too many fake and terrible doms confuse and confound us poor submissives.

That argument is actually kind of insulting, as if (in your example) the good submissive men can't be found by dominant women see because of all the bad ones get in the way. Do you really think the dominant women you seek are hampered by the fakes? No, most of them just move on, shake it off and don't whine about it.

I apologize, no insult was or is intended. And you slightly Misunderstand me. I don't think fakes hamper Dominant women any more than they do the submissive ones.

What the fakes do is make it harder for the non fakes to shine or stand out.
And even moreso to the newer and less experienced Dommes and subs.

Kalikshama had it spot on as I figure. We(men) have it easier in that respect, and in personal opinion, fact.

Fake is a subjective term depending on how you look at it, and there are many sub categories I think as well.

When I say fake I mean more the non submissives. or the selfish submissives. the users.

Those that come on with alternate profiles and who have wives or gf's on the side.
Those who come on and talk talk talk but never follow through. Never meet, or disappear.
Those who come on focused on getting their rocks off, and on finding something to masturbate to.
The guys who care nothing for what you seek or look for or what you say in your profile yet message you anyways.
etc etc etc.

Some of the above send first messages that are well thought out and no different than anyone other non fake. Yes most of them might be able to be identified and spotted 2-3 messages in, but it's that first message that usually matters. And when you have so many good interesting messages, from attractive men, you can't be expected to answer and start conversations with them all, can you?

I don't have experience with any of that so this is all assumption on my part based on conversations and journals and rantings of women. So maybe I'm wrong.

So to ask you, Does every Dom that catches your eye in the first message turn out to be real? Or do some fall into the above that were just very sly with their first contact?

That was my main point.

I feel that the good and submissive men CAN be found by the Domme women, but it's just that much more difficult and harder for us to stand out.

But that is my feeling and opinion.

Who knows, I may be wrong...

(in reply to DomMeinCT)

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/3/2012 8:40:21 PM

DomMeinCT

Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
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quote:

I don't have experience with any of that so this is all assumption on my part based on conversations and journals and rantings of women. So maybe I'm wrong.

I think you're wrong. Go look at both dominant and submissive profiles and journals and find plenty of them complaining about the same thing. The barriers you listed above are just as common in the vanilla world - your efforts and frustrations are no different. No matter what role you're in, it's an effort to find the right partner - that right person doesn't fall into anyone's lap without an effort.

Plenty of people AREN'T complaining, but are expending their energies focusing on the positive moving on when one path doesn't pan out.

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The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~ Carl Jung

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/4/2012 3:25:45 AM

lostnlooking9

Posts: 42
Joined: 10/27/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DomMeinCT

I think you're wrong. Go look at both dominant and submissive profiles and journals and find plenty of them complaining about the same thing. The barriers you listed above are just as common in the vanilla world - your efforts and frustrations are no different. No matter what role you're in, it's an effort to find the right partner - that right person doesn't fall into anyone's lap without an effort.

Plenty of people AREN'T complaining, but are expending their energies focusing on the positive moving on when one path doesn't pan out.

I respect you opinion on such. However I differ in my opinion.
And yes I do find and see that Dominant Men and submissive men complaining about the same thing. Just as I see Dominant women and submissive women do.
And I totally agree about the vanilla world. Women and men have it different, and that both have it similar to what they have here. It is what it is.
I also agree that the right person just doesn't fall into your lap execpt in movies. lol
But none of that changes my points and opinions above.

And I for one am not complaining. I consider myself a realist. Neither a pessimist nor optimist. All I'm doing is stating what is as best as I see and understand them. :)

Some people move on in different ways. some complain to get rid of their stress and frustration. And some don't get stressed and frustrated, and others just bottle it up.

Everyone is different in their own ways. :)

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/4/2012 4:58:21 AM

thishereboi

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TalkDominantToMe

I made appropriate adjustments to my original post. Happy?

How would you making adjustments to your post make someone happy? Do you honestly think anyone on cm really cares whether or not you meet your dream domme?

I agree with DS. Your profile says online only? Just how are you planning on being taken in if you are not willing to meet anyone? And what would the domme get out of it? Unless you are willing to reach into your pocket, I doubt you will find someone willing to play like that.

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RE: How to be taken in by a Mistress - 3/4/2012 5:01:54 AM

thishereboi

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: midmichiganguy

What do mistresses on here look for? LOL Look around! They look for people who have at least double their income. So that means you need to make at least 14.80 an hour or double whatever minimum wage is. You should also only have about 3 percent body fat in comparison to their 20 - 30 percent and you should be willing to work long unrewarding hours for them at whatever menial task they are too 'good' to do for themselves. Things like taking out the trash, doing their own laundry, washing their own dishes, etc. etc. Also be ready and willing to provide them with relocation costs, a vehicle of their choice, and a place to move into. If you can provide all these material things for them then you will have found what they are looking for in a submissive. Anything else that is said by them is mere window dressing to make themselves feel better. *Shrugs* I learned a long time ago to no longer listen upfront to what they are saying and to only look behind their words for their true intentions. You should do the same and you will be a better person for it TalkDominantToMe.

Still looking huh? Why am I not surprised.

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