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Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 10:28:03 AM   
feedher2


Posts: 4
Joined: 8/15/2008
Status: offline 		I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 10:54:57 AM   
mynxkat


Posts: 240
Joined: 5/7/2011
Status: offline 		I don't doubt there are people out there looking for the same thing, but finding one, especially finding one even halfway local to you, is going to be rough.

Good luck, though.

(in reply to feedher2)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 11:10:13 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Go to a play party. You will find women to play with, although sex will likely be off the table.

You also might be able to find a woman cheating on her husband who might be willing to entertain some kink.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to mynxkat)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 11:23:55 AM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven


You also might be able to find a woman cheating on her husband who might be willing to entertain some kink.


Not sure I like the connotation behind that last remark. Are you relating fun play to desperate or deceitful promiscuous women?

To the op. I think there are plenty of people who think like you. Not everyone needs to be the 'Dom' or the 'submissive/slave'. Most who frequent the more elaborate fetish clubs tend to be thrill seekers with open adventurous minds but don't want to get stuck in any particular mind set.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 11:28:36 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

You also might be able to find a woman cheating on her husband who might be willing to entertain some kink.

Please tell me you did not just say that





_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 11:33:10 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		OP, I am going to suggest you get involved in your locale BDSM community. Less so as a horny troll looking to get laid but really get INVOLVED. You don't have to be in a relationship to be involved with a group. It's not likely to reap any 'fun' reward quickly, but will likely be more successful than........"Hi, I'm Dave, I want to beat, fuck and leave."

And I have to agree with Irish and Maria........rather beneath you Steven. At least I assume so.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to feedher2)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 11:41:00 AM   
LoreBook


Posts: 257
Joined: 2/22/2012
Status: offline 		I am, or was (I think I found her!), looking for something along those lines - a regular long-term kinky FWB, or semi-casual setup. At this point in my life and exploration, play is really just a form of sex. At some point down the line I'll hope to find something more permanent, but just as I'm not really looking to get married right now, I'm not looking for a lifetime BDSM relationship either.

The preceding statement represents the views and opinions of the author and the author alone, and should in no way be considered an attempt by the author to define or determine anything for anybody but herself.



_____________________________

WITHOUT "ART" THE EARTH IS JUST "EH"



LLT

(in reply to feedher2)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 1:09:41 PM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		to the OP:
It is possible to find a long term relationship that is comprised of friendship, and play time, if you make it clear what you are looking for. I'm monogamous, but casual in almost all my relationships, and I make that clear to my partners. Most of them are perfectly cool with being relatively uncommited outside the bedroom.

You might want to re-evaluate what you want (and don't) and try to present that in a more attractive package and description other than, "I wanna fuck but not commit to you in any way". I am sure you can also provide friendship, and if you don;t intend to sleep around... then what is that other than a casual relationship? you fuck, you're friends... or do you just want a liscence to hop on multiple women? if so look for those in 'open relationships' meaning they are cool with you (and them) dating/playing with multiple people.

As always, best foot forward when seeking a play-mate or partner.

< Message edited by ProlificNeeds -- 3/19/2012 1:10:06 PM >

(in reply to LoreBook)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 1:12:19 PM   
saltie


Posts: 101
Joined: 6/30/2004
Status: offline 		Yes there is some who do just want to play. I am one of them. At first was kinky sex and now is just the kink.

(in reply to LoreBook)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 1:41:27 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		When I was single I was into friends with benifits, they were fun while looking for a 24/7 partner. Now that I am in a commited long term relationship of 5 years , i'm not looking for anything other than good friends who like kink like we do, so that won't be a taboo topic an we can go to events together.



quote:

ORIGINAL: feedher2

I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?



_____________________________

One world under lube with vibrators and dildo's for all! quote from the sex toy 101 book

(in reply to feedher2)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 1:59:02 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		You folks are right. I laid an egg with this one. Misinformed AND unethical.



_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 4:07:10 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

You folks are right. I laid an egg with this one. Misinformed AND unethical.




My faith in you has been redeemed


_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 4:19:46 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: feedher2

I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?

All long-term relationships start out as short-term relationships, unless you're in a culture that advocates arranged marriage. If women are 100% rejecting you, it may have more to do with your level of emotional maturity than the short-term you are offering.


Also, I thought DarkSteven's point was not far off the mark. There are a great many women who are married or otherwise attached to a vanilla, and they have his permission, or encouragement, to find a dom or a sub. That's definitely a pool one could date in "casually," and still be ethical.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to feedher2)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 4:22:08 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.


I did this when I lived in Florida and knew I was moving back to MA and didn't want any attachments. It was fun at first but I quickly got tired of driving home after a scene. Now I just commute from his bedroom to mine.

(in reply to feedher2)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 5:07:43 PM   
Alacrity


Posts: 40
Joined: 5/14/2005
Status: offline 		Yes you can find what you are looking for, but the odds of finding that here is slim. Be very very very very patient, and always be clear what you are seeking. Beyond that do what another poster suggested and go to play parties, and other social events.

You might have better luck finding a vanilla fuck-buddy and [slowly?] introduce her to BDSM. This has worked for me.

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 5:28:17 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		Play parties are your friend.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to Alacrity)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 5:58:30 PM   
hellionsLight


Posts: 241
Joined: 10/18/2011
From: Kearney, NE
Status: offline 		I'm sure there is someone - good luck! :) Actually, I'm of mind that I can do 'play', non-sexually, with just a 'play partner'. We don't even have to be 'friends'. We can just see each other to play, and nothing else.



_____________________________


(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 7:15:36 PM   
Baroana


Posts: 1480
Joined: 11/13/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: feedher2

I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?


Hopefully you have something to offer tit for tat, because nobody gets something for nothing.

(in reply to feedher2)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/19/2012 7:24:27 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		I used to have a kinky FWB when I was single, so I know it's possible. It might not just fall into your lap though and, to make it work, you both need to be on the same page as far as any rules go and both come out of each encounter satisfied.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to Baroana)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Someone to 'play' with - 3/20/2012 5:49:40 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		It's not really difficult for women to find someone to get a little sumpin sumpin from. If you are looking for that, you may want to make sure you have something to grab her attention.

Playing can be different from sex for many people. Just bear that in mind.

And finally, come on. Lots of people have affairs. There are plenty of married women who would be interested in this. I expect the OP knows that. That doesn't really seem like a surprise to me. The only thing is that if one is having an affair, it can be dang difficult to play and leave no marks. I'm reminded of the scene in "Unfaithful" in which Olivier Martinez' character drew a tiny flower on Diane Lane's character's body. Tiny but caused some upset.

good luck,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
Profile   Post #: 20
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