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RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/27/2012 5:03:24 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline 		the average male submissives on this site i have noticed are slaves to thier penis and thier fetishes.

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Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to Arienos)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/27/2012 5:41:19 PM   
Duskypearls


Posts: 3561
Joined: 8/21/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arienos

quote:

Quiet confidence, honesty, transparency, forthright, integrity, honor, humility, modesty, compassionate, passionate, protective, patient, humorous, sexual/sensual, resourceful, respectful, open/generous mind and heart, flexibiity, happy, playful, loving, intelligent (academic or street smarts), mature, assertive, sincere, tenacious, self-assured, hard-working, responsible, principled, accountable, reliable, sensitive, faithful, polite, respectful, well-mannered, courteous, courageous, considerate, ambitious, spiritual (whatever that means to them), spontaneous, forgiving, mentally/emotional present, gentle, strong, willing to take correction and direction when appropriate, can exercise self-restraint, loves to touch and be touched, and with good "backbone!" [/quote

Duskypearls:
You have just described the average male submissive.


You may like to think so, my friend, but I have had the good fortune to find these all of these qualities in one of the most remarkable, masculine leaders I have ever met.

(in reply to Arienos)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/27/2012 11:45:14 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5169
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		great sense of humor, kind to others, helpful, trustworthy, honest

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Yes, I am crazy about feathered creatures. I have a dozen chickens, 3 ducks, 5 geese, and 2 parakeets.

Revise that number. Just got 14 new chicks and 5 turkeys.

(in reply to SoulPixel)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/28/2012 7:39:33 AM   
daddysgirl8230


Posts: 6
Joined: 3/22/2012
Status: offline 		first and formost Honest, Trusting,caring, nutriting (sorry about my spelling) someone who isn't pushy, someone who has Years of experince..(i will not go with novices) I love older men so he would have to be over 40.....sense of humor, appericate the gift that he is being given (a submissive her mind body and soul to him) I want someone who works hard, drives, tall, blue eyes, clean cut (all around) accepts me as i am but also wants me to achive all that i can....and so so much more!
kitten

(in reply to Arienos)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/28/2012 8:02:54 AM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline
Financially stable, successful, but self made. Compassionate but ruthless when it's needed. Willing to stand up to anyone, and the ability to protect his home and me, with whatever means are necessary. Must love animals, be liberal, at least socially, enjoy going to art galleries, plays, events, is a man's man. Clean cut, masculine, knows how to dress, not afraid to get dirty, the kind of man people look at when he walks into a room.

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As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



(in reply to daddysgirl8230)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/28/2012 12:42:15 PM   
LunaM


Posts: 183
Joined: 3/3/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Endivius

the average male submissives on this site i have noticed are slaves to thier penis and thier fetishes.



Bwahahahahahahaha!

_____________________________

~BloodRed's Slave~

~Love is our response to our highest values and can be nothing else~

~And yet she had never felt more totally committed to a will, which was not her own, more totally a slave and more content to be so~

(in reply to Endivius)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/29/2012 11:24:14 AM   
VioletViolence


Posts: 169
Joined: 1/30/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arienos

Duskypearls:
You have just described the average male submissive.


I agree with Endivius. The "average" male submissive is *nothing* like that.....the spectacular ones, they are the ones who embody the listed qualities.

< Message edited by VioletViolence -- 3/29/2012 11:25:32 AM >

(in reply to Arienos)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/29/2012 2:08:25 PM   
Soyokaze


Posts: 390
Joined: 4/1/2007
Status: offline 		Being intelligent, being understanding, having the same interests as me, having good foresight and hindsight, being able to appreciate a dry sense of humor, knowing when to push and when to back off, Being able to be comfortable outside of my shell around them. There's a bunch more I could list, but I'll stick with the ones that came off the top of my head.

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"When I was a little kid, I wish the first word I ever said was 'quote' so right before I died I could say 'end quote'" -Steven Wright

(in reply to VioletViolence)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/29/2012 2:30:57 PM   
joshspet1980


Posts: 63
Joined: 3/12/2012
From: Texas originally but live in Washington
Status: offline 		As a person I would like him to have honesty, integrity, love, caring, gentleness, protectiveness, and a desire to please as much as be pleased. I have discovered I'm more of a Dom's Little Girl Sub. I like for him to sit me in front of him and brush my hair. And I like for him to tell me what he wants me to wear to look pretty for him. I also like being told to take care of myself. I like it when he gets demanding.

I want him to have a take charge attitude. I want to be able to put full trust in him that no matter what he will protect, love, and take care of me.

Now in the bedroom, I want him to push my limits. That's why I like the idea of being blindfolded and tied, so that I can't stop him. It's something he thinks I will like because he knows me so well, but I'm hesitant because I'm afraid I won't like it. I want him to help me push beyond that and try new things and discover more things that I love and maybe I won't like everything we try. But at least we tried them.

And with that said, I also want him to push my limits in daily life. If he thinks I'm giving up on something too easily I want him to tell me. Then I want him to point out what I could be doing to improve. If I fight, I would want him to insist and maybe use his command over me to demand obedience on it. That helps me push past my shyness and my hesitations. I am not the most confident person in the world. I want him to push my limits in every way.

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"I love Jesus, my horse, then it's between you and the dog." "Yeah, Cowboy Up!"

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(in reply to txurinal)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/30/2012 3:16:31 PM   
Wheldrake


Posts: 477
Status: offline 		Some of the qualities that appeal to me in a dominant woman are the same ones that I would look for in a friend or a vanilla lover - intelligence, imagination, integrity, a thoughtful and sceptical cast of mind, emotional maturity. Beyond that, my ideal dominant would be controlling, highly sadistic and assertive, but also reasonably patient, understanding and aware of her own limitations. I would want her to be doing something interesting and worthwhile with her life, so that I could feel I was contributing to something interesting and worthwhile by serving her. She could also be confident, even a bit arrogant, to a degree that I would find off-putting in anyone but a dominant. Experience in handling submissives would be very desirable, as would adventurousness and an urge to keep experimenting with new toys, techniques and situations.

I would actually find it erotic and fulfilling if she had some interests, preferences and sensibilities that didn't appeal to me at all, but imposed them on me anyway. Servitude feels more like servitude when it isn't entirely pleasant or comfortable.

It certainly wouldn't hurt for her to have fantastic topping skills, to be at least a little older than me and from a different ethnicity, and to have some physical size and strength. She would be intimidating in any case, because of her dominant personality, but an imposing physique would add another dimension.

I should mention that I'm with someone who has many of these qualities, although not all of them - but then, the question was about an "ideal" dominant, and it would be unfair to expect any real human being to measure up.

(in reply to SoulPixel)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 3/31/2012 2:57:58 AM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		[ED to fix quotage balls-up]

quote:

ORIGINAL: Duskypearls


quote:

ORIGINAL: Arienos

quote:

Quiet confidence, honesty, transparency, forthright, integrity, honor, humility, modesty, compassionate, passionate, protective, patient, humorous, sexual/sensual, resourceful, respectful, open/generous mind and heart, flexibiity, happy, playful, loving, intelligent (academic or street smarts), mature, assertive, sincere, tenacious, self-assured, hard-working, responsible, principled, accountable, reliable, sensitive, faithful, polite, respectful, well-mannered, courteous, courageous, considerate, ambitious, spiritual (whatever that means to them), spontaneous, forgiving, mentally/emotional present, gentle, strong, willing to take correction and direction when appropriate, can exercise self-restraint, loves to touch and be touched, and with good "backbone!" [/quote

Duskypearls:
You have just described the average male submissive.


You may like to think so, my friend, but I have had the good fortune to find these all of these qualities in one of the most remarkable, masculine leaders I have ever met.



Arienos: I'm not sure that's a description of the "average" sub. A sub with all of those traits would be pretty exceptional, just as a dominant with those traits would be pretty exceptional.

I'm curious though - which of those traits would you regard as unnecessary in an ideal dominant?

Duskypearls: I liked the list, although I'd say that you've described an ideal "person" of either side of the kneel. I say this because you've listed every one of the traits I look for in an ideal sub partner...

To the board in general : Fuck me with a stick! No wonder we have to be patient when looking for our ideal - we've all got pretty high standards! (Not a bad thing mind you..)

< Message edited by crazyml -- 3/31/2012 3:11:33 AM >

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(in reply to Duskypearls)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Qualities which intrigue you with ideal dominants - 4/1/2012 10:43:57 AM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline 		Neither Carol or I would ever look for a "master" or a "slave". So we'd be looking for the usual set of stuff... a decent human with whom we have good chemistry.

Carol would probably give bonus points to someone who was [socially] dominant. I might be adding some bonus points for someone who i thought might become property. For me, I don't think I'd care at all about either sexually or socially submissive.

In my experience, the magic part is that word "chemistry". In all my life I have found it to be entirely, totally, and 100% unpredictable. So lists of traits are, in my experience, at best a waste of energy and at worst a filter on reality that prevents someone from seeing the truth. I had such a list when I met Carol. I'm very, very glad I tossed the list in the garbage can in favor of the actual reality of her.

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I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to crazyml)
Profile   Post #: 32
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