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Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 3:13:28 PM   
SnowRanger


Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline 		Hello A/all,

Something that I read on another thread here on Ask-A-Mistress put a burr under my sadle so to speak. I was THINKING, which was wearing me out! Maybe I am one of those that do not "get" the Cuckoldry Kink. I hesitate to express my ignorance; but, I am going to ask a question.

To the Dommes that practice it: Is your cuckold chaste or monogamous? In either case, why? (Okay, that is two questions.)

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 3:15:10 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		What an excellent question, Mike!

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 4:17:27 PM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline 		Chael's monogamous with me. Why? Because that's the best arrangement for us. I like having him be sexual, so I don't keep him chaste. It's not something we have a shared interest in.

With s-types that I am non-sexual with I'm very keen on having them be chaste. Because with some I *am* into that denial aspect.

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 7:31:41 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Mine was monogamous.

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 7:37:12 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger

Hello A/all,

Something that I read on another thread here on Ask-A-Mistress put a burr under my sadle so to speak. I was THINKING, which was wearing me out! Maybe I am one of those that do not "get" the Cuckoldry Kink. I hesitate to express my ignorance; but, I am going to ask a question.

To the Dommes that practice it: Is your cuckold chaste or monogamous? In either case, why? (Okay, that is two questions.)

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger


Let me just say this about that.....SnowRanger...you're asking about cuckoldry....(as I might).

So.......

You've posed the question......

And you're rather surreptitious about it.....but I might question....."hmmmmmmm.....I wonder....is he asking to be prurient or.....is he asking to be poignant?"

And so I offer that you're just a perv....asking as I would, but trying to be......uhhhhhh.....surreptitious.

And by the way....

(It didn't fly).

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 7:46:05 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		He's looking for an answer, JJ. Don't be a douche.

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 8:31:13 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

He's looking for an answer, JJ. Don't be a douche.



But.....I......ok....

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/25/2012 9:39:56 PM   
MissImmortalPain


Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline 		Some are some aren't. The livein now is in chastity so it isn't a big issue, but he is mine and is with no one else either way. The last was welcome to do what he wished but was monogamous, but for a whole different set of reasons. I also have to add that the realationship is different depending on if the person is male or female(at least with me) I set the rules for women differently than I do for men.

< Message edited by MissImmortalPain -- 3/25/2012 9:47:39 PM >

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/26/2012 8:24:42 PM   
SnowRanger


Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline 		I want to know where I fit in (if at all). I was recently involved in a correspondence with a vey nice (married) woman that listed cuckolding among her 'dislikes.' On the other hand, she was open to the idea of having a secondary partner who would be exclusive to her.

From previous conversations with Mistresses who practice it, the cuckold 'kink' seems to involve chastity on the part of the 'cuck.' Further, there seems to be a strong aspect of degrading said cuck as un-worthy as a lover (and a lousy martini maker, and a lousy... Well... You get the idea....).

However, some people seem to consider cuckolds as being monogamous partners (usually, but not necessarily, a husband) to a woman who has multiple partners herself. Surely you can see my confusion!

So... If a Mistress lists Cuckoldry in her "Lives-For" or "Loves," just what does that mean? I can live with being monogamous. You can take chastity and... Well... You get the idea....

Then to REALLY confuse me, Lady Pact seems to make a distinction between Cuckoldry and Polyamoury. <GACK>

Well, I am off to the airport. Time to practice my figure eights.
Mike

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/26/2012 9:16:37 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger
Then to REALLY confuse me, Lady Pact seems to make a distinction between Cuckoldry and Polyamoury. <GACK>

Mike

Yes, oddly enough, I do.  Then again, remember that I make distinctions between open relationships, cheating, cuckoldry, threesomes, friends with benefits, voyeurism, poly, and a bunch of other things.

What might be the confusing part is that I look at these situations not just from the sexual angle, but from the underlying understanding between the participants.  These different types of relationships aren't all based on what is happening in bed and that is what makes some of them very difficult to understand to the outside observer.  When just looking at the bedroom part, a lot of this looks really similar.  It's only when you get past what might be happening sexually do you discover that it's not.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/26/2012 10:14:29 PM   
SnowRanger


Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline 		It is not really so odd My Lady. You've given the whole thing a lot more thought than I have. Remember what I said above about thinking? In time, I expect that I will be pretty good at it.

I recognize that it ISN'T about sex any more than it's about the whips and chains (does anybody REALLY use chains?).

In the past year or so, I have come to terms with Polyamoury and where I fit in to that. I have done a bit of lurking in that forum. As I open my mind to one thing I see past it to many more. Sometimes I feel a bit overwhelmed.

Mike

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/26/2012 10:26:15 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		It is overwhelming and it's a process.

If you would ever like to talk about this on the other side, I will do what I can.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to SnowRanger)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/26/2012 10:26:47 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

What an excellent question, Mike!


Yeah but...it was actually two questions.

(You didn't catch that did you? Just ANOTHER reason why I sit in the BIG chair!!!!!!)

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/27/2012 6:15:15 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I am going to bite you really hard, JJ.

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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/27/2012 6:53:19 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		You'd think JJ would be thrilled that this particular kink is getting so much attention lately.  

As always, I'm a 'go to the source' person about what one particular person means when they say something on their profile, etc.  The rest of us can only guess.  This is just My thought process on what she might mean.

Polyamory, to Me, isn't about using your relationships with other people against somebody in any way.  In cuckoldry, even if you are just doing it in the slightest bit, that's part of it.  For the latter, it's not the goal for it to be 100% "good".  At best, it's something that you tolerate as part of the deal.  There really is a difference between liking a situation and accepting it. 


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/27/2012 8:02:00 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Judging from the savage discussions that go on over on Fetl, I would absolutely discuss the terms when poly is discussed. I tell people that I am poly, because that's how I am wired. That doesn't mean that I am not able to be sexually monogamous as far as people-touching-me is concerned.



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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/27/2012 8:04:11 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Kind of ate up, aren't they?  One of the very reasons I prefer to discuss it here.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/27/2012 8:45:21 AM   
Arienos


Posts: 161
Joined: 10/5/2011
Status: offline
quote:

What might be the confusing part is that I look at these situations not just from the sexual angle, but from the underlying understanding between the participants. These different types of relationships aren't all based on what is happening in bed and that is what makes some of them very difficult to understand to the outside observer.


Lady Pact:
Once again your mind leaps from the obvious to a fundamental understanding. Contrary to the belief of many what occurs on a higher level is of equal...if not greater importance.

< Message edited by Arienos -- 3/27/2012 8:46:53 AM >

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/27/2012 6:07:08 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger

Hello A/all,

Something that I read on another thread here on Ask-A-Mistress put a burr under my sadle so to speak. I was THINKING, which was wearing me out! Maybe I am one of those that do not "get" the Cuckoldry Kink. I hesitate to express my ignorance; but, I am going to ask a question.

To the Dommes that practice it: Is your cuckold chaste or monogamous? In either case, why? (Okay, that is two questions.)

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger


Snow.....I'd probably look at Craigslist. Seek out people looking for new furniture.

I think there's something there.

(in reply to SnowRanger)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Apropos of Cuckoldry: Chastity or Monogamy - 3/27/2012 8:26:20 PM   
VanessaChaland


Posts: 362
Joined: 11/23/2008
Status: offline 		My husband is monogamous.
Why?
Because I say so. :)

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If you want to know more about me and my interests, Google my name.

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Profile   Post #: 20
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