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RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 3/30/2012 9:12:47 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Border Guards


I lost an Nazi (and other military) dagger collection and some antique medical gear worth more than $10,000.

I went to Canada with a trunk full of gear. On the way back, US Customs nailed me and impounded my stuff. I had no receipts to prove country of origin or value. There was ivory, gold and jade on the daggers, carvings and antique medical gear etc.

After evaluating the attorney fees, investigator costs to track down valid receipts, bribes to dealers to forge fake receipts, it was almost a wash. I never got my shit back.

Bring receipts for every piece of gear proving you bought it in the USA not Canada. Otherwise those vanilla fuckers at the border will have a means to screw with you and take ALL your shit.

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RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 3/30/2012 9:25:56 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

Is there also a concern with those situations and the doctors seeing any marks that straps may have left behind?


Yes, because they have a duty to report, which is why the last time I had a GYN appt the day after a beating, I disclaimed ahead of time, "You're going to see bruises. They were consensual."



"Duty to report" is very often misunderstood by the public. The missing part is "duty to report suspected abuse or neglect." States mandate a duty to report for children; some also have a duty to report for any adult, and some only for an elder adult. The key word is SUSPECTED. Seeing bruises does not automatically equate to suspected abuse.

Cali


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(in reply to kalikshama)
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RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 3/30/2012 9:37:21 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		Right, which is why I clarified that it was NOT abuse before they even had the chance to see my admittedly spectacular bruises.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 3/30/2012 11:27:18 AM   
MrBukani


Posts: 1920
Joined: 4/18/2010
Status: offline 		I told some people in the past I LIKE IT.
Turkish man "said ssssssssshhh yes I spank here donnut tok bow it."
Viking brute badass carpenter told me,"I would beat their ass bloody in a corner and ask, DO YOU like IT?"
I had my 'vanilla' ughe hatchoou answers

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 3/30/2012 7:40:27 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		My therapist knew.

We're not into visible marks, but if you are the easiest way around this is for your primary to know what you like to do.

Beyond that, if someone separated us to ask if I was being abused, I would have no problem saying it was totally consensual and usually a lot of fun.


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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 3/30/2012 10:39:02 PM   
artemiss


Posts: 88
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		Only one I've had was with my gyno.  Had to go in for an emergency visit when my body tried to expel my IUD, and had some significant stripes on my ass and thighs.  She asked, "I assume those were consensual," I said "yes." No big deal, end of story.

(in reply to another1harder)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 3/31/2012 7:40:52 PM   
MasterAutarch


Posts: 38
Joined: 3/6/2012
Status: offline 		I had a childhood friend who had ego issues, was a lesbian and was "high maintenance" emotionally but with whom I had remained in touch for over 35 years. When I told her I had a girl friend that liked to be spanked and into BDSM my old friend had a fit, called me a pervert, and threatened to out me to family if I ever contacted her again.

Given all that she went through dealing with her family and others due to her being a lesbian I was surprised at how intolerant she was. I attribute part of it to mental instability and part to human nature. My kink is ok but your kink is wrong!

(in reply to artemiss)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 4/1/2012 11:16:00 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RumpusParable

I went in for a pap and exam and totally forgot that I had a black-and-blue ass. I remembered when she sat down to do her work and I realized part of what she was looking at. I just said, "You may see some marks down there, don't worry, they're completely consensual". She said, "ok" and wasn't bothered at all. No problems.

Another time I went in to get a brazilian waxing (from a woman I'd gotten tons of them from already, so we had chatted a lot) and didn't think about the fact that I'd been beat all over the butt and vulva the night before. No marks, but it made getting waxed interesting... We joked about it together.

Neither of those incidents were from Me, were they?  That would have been funny as hell.

As to the OP, I'm in firm agreement with making your health care professionals aware.  It's better to have that stuff documented before something comes up, rather than weird questions after. 


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Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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(in reply to RumpusParable)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Close encounters with our BDSM lifestyle versus pub... - 4/1/2012 1:42:00 PM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterAutarch

I had a childhood friend who had ego issues, was a lesbian and was "high maintenance" emotionally but with whom I had remained in touch for over 35 years. When I told her I had a girl friend that liked to be spanked and into BDSM my old friend had a fit, called me a pervert, and threatened to out me to family if I ever contacted her again.

Given all that she went through dealing with her family and others due to her being a lesbian I was surprised at how intolerant she was. I attribute part of it to mental instability and part to human nature. My kink is ok but your kink is wrong!

Well, I think there's Two kinds of feminists: women who like women, and women who hate men, and I know you can say the same about men, but "feminist" covers a significant dichotomy, i.e., Dworkin/MacKinnon vs. say Madison Young.

Anyway, my last GF was on all kinds of meds for neuropathy, made her kind of twitchy - we didn't do any SM stuff, she was pretty much in chronic pain all the time already, woulda been redundant, but she kept falling out of bed in the middle of the night, and the first time she did it she really smacked her face on the floor, Black eye, bruised cheek, and bruised her hip - apparently her family was quite concerned I was being too strict with her.

I hadda lay multicolored closed cell foam floaty mats all around the bed after that and I got one of those baby side rails that has feet that slide under the mattress, lol, looked like a nursery.

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(in reply to MasterAutarch)
Profile   Post #: 29
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