RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new slave?

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/6/2012 2:43:19 PM

GotSteel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint
Again I wonder why inexperienced Doms in their first relationship feel the need to punish or abuse someone. Shouldn't a Dom be able to inspire a sub?

Males often learn about the birds and the bees by watching porn, unfortunately this tends to give a somewhat skewed view of how D/s relationships work.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/6/2012 2:51:24 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

Yes. Do a google search for 'submissive checklist', and have her fill one out for you to review. It can be very eye-opening. Actually, it would be good for you to fill one out for her, as well (from the dominant perspective.)

DaKid8, have you done this yet? If so, great!

But if you haven't found and printed out the checklist yet, you might want to ask yourself how serious you are, and whether that is as serious as you would like to be.

Good luck.

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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 1:52:30 PM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
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From: Newcastle, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Madame4a

if I had a slave they'd be cleaning the house... doing yardwork and working on my motorcycle... after that, there might be some sex, for me...

Lol, my general contempt for all teenage "masters" has a lot to do with "teen" meaning the OP likely doesn't need any tips on how to be all self-centred and self-entitled etc. Selfish and teen is a symbiotic state of being.... ;)

Focus.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 8:11:12 PM

MASTERMONGO1

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Joined: 8/2/2009
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Start with mind control. Show her who is in charge. I use corner time, nose to wall silence as I flog or crop her ass. I also use dress control, usually in a nice tight pair of boots as she serves. Always collared and leashed.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 9:01:54 PM

FrankAr

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GotSteel

Males often learn about the birds and the bees by watching porn,

Greetings,

I know that all MY females should be wearing heels or sandshoes, or roller skates while we are making out and she groans after 10 seconds with delight. If she doesn't then she is just faking it........LOLOL.

Frank.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 9:52:30 PM

JeffBC

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@DaKid8
Personally I think you should stick with your chosen label and tell everyone here to get lost... your life... your label. If it stirs your imagination and gets you all hard and your girlfriend all moist & wanting then why on God's green earth would you change it because some random internet experts told you to? Here's a little tip. I didn't ask anyone if it was OK to call myself a "master". I know for a fact that lots of people... some of them with really good reasons behind it... would say I am not a "master". So my credentials are basically zip. Now if I said you should or should not use a label, why would you listen to me?

I'd offer you something on your kinks but they're not my bag.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 10:08:15 PM

DomRidersSwitch

Posts: 19
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OP...
I would stick to the label and dynamics that work for YOU and YOURS. People argue over who should and shouldn't call themselves master/slave, dominant/submissive, ect all the time especially on these boards. I will also state that simply because you are 19 doesn't mean you are lacking in life experiences in and out of the lifestyle.

I also think that you ruffled feathers by using the word abuse in your OP. *shrugs* That is their cross to bear not yours. Abuse is alot of different things to alot of different people. Hell what most of us do is considered abuse by the vanilla world in one way or another. Lord knows what goes on in my relaitonship would be. Lol

I would suggest that you and your slave go through the checklist together then discuss it. I used to do this periodically, now I dont have a need to because his limits are mine. Here is the list I used. http://latches.webslaves.com/checklist.htm

BTW Focus... you insult him because of his age. Well perhaps manners should come with being YOUR age. Damn.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 10:15:38 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

I also think that you ruffled feathers by using the word abuse in your OP.

I doubt it. I suspect it was "master". I've seen this before. The older people look at what THEY mean by "master" and then say "This person is in no way ready to do that." That's probably a true statement and I'm pretty sure that most young adults are not stupid. For instance, I have to assume that if the OP knew what I meant by "master" he would immediately say, "nope, not that". But I don't own the BDSM dictionary. Last I checked, there were a whole ton of [sex] masters and [sex] slaves out there.

I don't really know why this happens. I'm suddenly suspicious that I've been guilty of it in the past.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 10:25:02 PM

DomRidersSwitch

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quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

I also think that you ruffled feathers by using the word abuse in your OP.

I doubt it. I suspect it was "master". I've seen this before. The older people look at what THEY mean by "master" and then say "

Honestly I think it's probably a bit of both Jeff. Lol
Like you I have seen A LOT of people get twisted over who should and shouldn't use the master label on these boards.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 10:26:22 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DomRidersSwitch
Like you I have seen A LOT of people get twisted over who should and shouldn't use the master label on these boards.

Like me for instance... although for the most part I think most of my chair-spinning was around whether I should use it lol.

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I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 10:34:15 PM

obedientslave70

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slave from chennai here

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/7/2012 10:38:10 PM

sincelo

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The funny thing is that everyone agrees that sub/slave can mean many different things .. but Master has to mean more.
He didn't tell anyone else to call him master. Perhaps she gets off on it too .. perhaps he does.
Really as long as he isn't trying to claim to be a master at a specific skill ... i have no problems with him considering himself a master for his girlie.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 3:46:19 AM

DaKid8

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Thanks for the responses.

I like being called Master and she likes calling me it. I am not asking anyone else to call me it.

I am a teen. I am 19. However, age is just a number.I am very smart and mature. I have met people that are twice my age that act like children and I have met people younger than me that act like mature adults.

Thanks DomRidersSwitch. I will check that link out.

My girl means the world to me. She enjoys and begs to be abused, hurt and humiliated. Just because I like doing those things to her does not mean I don't love and care about her.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 7:25:24 AM

SinFix

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As I had stated... if you enjoy the more sadistic aspects of your relationship, then learn more about how to safely do those things...
and I will say some of the issue was the word abuse, as the person above me pointed out a lot of what we do can be and is construed as abusive.. While I will venture to say that she may not actually want you to abuse her, throwing that word around leads us to believe that you are just some j/o that has no regards for her. Now stating she likes to be hurt, humiliated is a whole nother ball game.
I think you are most likely a really nice guy that is learning what it is he likes and how to best bring into your relationship those things you both are enjoying. As I said, go out and get real life exposure to those things you are interested in. Search for local munches, demonstrations, and seminars on those things to get a better grasp on them. Learn to play safely with your toys, as I am sure you would hate to break it. Enjoy the learning as much as the doing, this is a great adventure and exploration into yourselves.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 10:18:03 AM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaKid8
I am a teen. I am 19. However, age is just a number.I am very smart and mature.

OK, that I disagree with and that is one of the typical stupid things youths say. I would recommend avoiding it. In my opinion the mistake made here by the "you're not a master" crew was that they felt, for some odd reason, that their definition of master meant anything at all in your relationship. They would all defend themselves bitterly if you were to say that they weren't true masters or true slaves. But for some reason, they felt it was appropriate to tell you that. It's just plain hypocrisy.

That being said, age is not just a number. Step back and look at that statement for a moment. Honestly, I'd like to believe that I got something in exchange for all the heartaches and wrinkles. You may be very smart and very mature. But the whole life experience thing is really just hard to get around. Consider that Carol and I have been a couple for about as long as you've been alive. No, age is not "just" a number.

Heh, but given the responses you've gotten on this thread... a bit of "testy" is certainly warranted nor would I be feeling much respect for the ages of many of the posters.

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I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 10:24:14 AM

searching4mysir

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quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

I also think that you ruffled feathers by using the word abuse in your OP.

I doubt it. I suspect it was "master". I've seen this before. The older people look at what THEY mean by "master" and then say "This person is in no way ready to do that." That's probably a true statement and I'm pretty sure that most young adults are not stupid. For instance, I have to assume that if the OP knew what I meant by "master" he would immediately say, "nope, not that". But I don't own the BDSM dictionary. Last I checked, there were a whole ton of [sex] masters and [sex] slaves out there.

I don't really know why this happens. I'm suddenly suspicious that I've been guilty of it in the past.

Jeff,

I think perhaps it is because he has shown on multiple occasions that he can't even manage self-mastery. He's a kid and acts like one.

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 11:05:25 AM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir
I think perhaps it is because he has shown on multiple occasions that he can't even manage self-mastery. He's a kid and acts like one.

That is your opinion and you are certainly entitled to it. I disagree. In YOUR eyes he has shown that. In MY eyes, I'm seeing a young man who has been slammed pretty hard for no apparent reason by a bunch of alleged adults. I think he's actually showing a great deal of self-discipline and control for his age... or for a lot of ages actually. I'd be pleased if I were him... although I would've made a few mental notes about "room for improvement". By extension, I'd be making apologies if I were some others. I am personally embarrassed that I think I've done similar things in the past. If those threads were recent I'd be making public apologies on them.

That's how I'm viewing this situation.

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 11:53:10 AM

TNDommeK

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I think the reason why he isn't getting good feedback is probably due to the fact that this has been posted in a previous thread...and his age was certainly shown when he told OsideGirl to suck a dick. Just sayin'....

Here's that link:http://www.collarchat.com/m_4081797/tm.htm

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 12:07:33 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_4081797/tm.htm

Yes, I saw that thread.. it reinforces my opinion rather than changing it.

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I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

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RE: Any suggestions on how to abuse/humiliate my new sl... - 4/8/2012 3:10:03 PM

Focus50

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quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir
I think perhaps it is because he has shown on multiple occasions that he can't even manage self-mastery. He's a kid and acts like one.

That is your opinion and you are certainly entitled to it. I disagree. In YOUR eyes he has shown that. In MY eyes, I'm seeing a young man who has been slammed pretty hard for no apparent reason by a bunch of alleged adults. I think he's actually showing a great deal of self-discipline and control for his age... or for a lot of ages actually. I'd be pleased if I were him... although I would've made a few mental notes about "room for improvement". By extension, I'd be making apologies if I were some others. I am personally embarrassed that I think I've done similar things in the past. If those threads were recent I'd be making public apologies on them.

That's how I'm viewing this situation.

Lol, I *always* "slam" the dom kids to see how they react in the self-control department. 'Cause, you know, they're all mature beyond their years; that life experience (and anything else kids don't have) is overrated and we all know an example of that 5% of the population of immature oldies who are regularly cited as typical examples of *all* we older, more experienced.

So to review - I slammed what I assumed was a typical immature teenager only to get a response typical of an immature teenager ("in control").... I pushed to see what pushed back - normal/typical human behaviour. He responded like a normal/typical, indignant, know-it-all teenager.

So you'll just have to pardon me when I say there'll be no apology forthcoming because there isn't any reason for one; that one of you and I apparently lives in Mary Poppins land.... Life's tough - and so it should be in the building of character and getting of experience.

Focus.

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Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

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