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Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 1:17:07 PM

WyldAngelOnly4U

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/11/2012
Status: offline

I haven't found a thread where I could post this so....

After doing some research and self discovery, I recently posted a profile to CollarMe.com. I found the "vanilla" world of dating left me feeling a bit empty emotionally and unsatisfied. I was looking for more depth and passion. I was bombarded with responses right away and so flattered on this site.

After reading through a few of the initial posts one in particular stuck out to me and we began messaging each other. I'm a Submissive and he is a Dominant. I think because I am mature I knew more of what I was looking for. Never did I dream it would be so mind blowing.

How could I have been missing out on this for so long??? All the misconceptions and stereotypes I think kept me from ever educating myself about the lifestyle. I had been married for most of my adult life and had led a sheltered existence. Once I did divorce, as I stated, dating was just a rinse repeat of the same types of men. Plain old vanilla.

Basically I am just so thankful to have found a safe place like ColarMe where I can grow as a person with people who are nonjudgmental and informative. The Dominant I've met is just such an incredible human being and everything is so natural and intense and AMAZING! I don't feel now as if I was somehow searching for an impossible fantasy because it is more than I ever imagined already.

The thing about a Dominant, as you know and I'm discovering, is that they can stimulate your mind in ways that are utterly phenomenal. The mere sound of his voice has power over me because he is so confident, intelligent, sane, direct, giving, imaginative and sexual. He is so attentive and careful and respectful with me and honors me with his restraint as he guides me into his world and shares himself.

Better than any romance novel, better than any movie, better than any vanilla dreams I had previously.... Thank You!!!

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RE: Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 1:59:06 PM

Buzzzz

Posts: 839
Joined: 11/28/2010
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I am not sure "collarme" and "safe place" go well together. But welcome anyway :)

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RE: Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 2:19:12 PM

cyclical

Posts: 10
Joined: 12/12/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Buzzzz

I am not sure "collarme" and "safe place" go well together. But welcome anyway :)

+1

I like to think I have a pretty good "freak detector". Hopefully you have a pretty good one as well!

(in reply to Buzzzz)

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RE: Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 2:33:40 PM

RumpusParable

Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline

"a safe place like ColarMe where I can grow as a person with people who are nonjudgmental and informative"

You really haven't been on this or other kink sites long, have you.

There is nothing different here than in the vanilla world. Some will judge you, some will be uninformative or actively misleading, some will be out-right cruel. Exactly the same as any "vanilla" website.

Also, I'd search the term "sub frenzy". It's important to be aware of it in the beginning.

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RE: Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 3:34:56 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

^^
What she said, and in particular this part below.
And try to remember that not everything that glitters is gold, including some who profess to be dominant and hit you up like new meat to a vulture as soon as you enter.

quote:

ORIGINAL: RumpusParable

Also, I'd search the term "sub frenzy". It's important to be aware of it in the beginning.

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pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

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RE: Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 4:19:37 PM

ProlificNeeds

Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline

FR~

Danger Will Robinson!

+1 caution for online encounters
+1 caution for seeking freaky kinksters
+1 caution for being on a website dedicated to material wankers flock to.
+1 caution for sub frenzy.
= be extra cautious, least you ruin your rosey view of BDSM before you develop a fair outlook.

(in reply to Missokyst)

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RE: Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 5:01:34 PM

WyldAngelOnly4U

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/11/2012
Status: offline

Thank you very much! All great advice, especially for newbies. I am being cautious, believe me. I def know what you mean about the sub frenzy and new meat. I've just found a very down to earth guy who is dominant and wonderful. I know there are a lot of people with bad or selfish intentions and not just online but in the real world too. Thankfully I have the wisdom of age, I'm 41 though I don't look it ;), to help me make better choices. Though I'm submissive I'm also a smart and strong woman. The great advice goes to people on the forums especially for basic advice that is really appreciated about some of the details that newbs like me are curious about. Number one I ask A LOT of questions and keep myself informed. Thanks again!

(in reply to ProlificNeeds)

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RE: Newbie Sub - Please read other newbies - 5/13/2012 11:32:01 PM

kitkat105

Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/29/2011
From: Eating dutch crunch in the Silicon Valley
Status: offline

Enjoy, but be careful like you would with any other perspective relationship. Read all you can and be aware that subfrenzy is real!

Munches and the kink community often have events for newbies, it might be worth checking out.

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