RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (Full Version)

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Englishcrumpet -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 11:45:31 AM)

"No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress,
you are still way ahead of everyone who isn’t trying."

yeppers! - re-quoted for absolute truth and clarity



LadyConstanze -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 11:49:35 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Englishcrumpet

blimey! - well if the bird he wrote to and got ignored by wasnt enough!

im not great at writing back either, but then i put in my profile im not going to respond to anyone, because im fixed and not looking. 

i would think that its reasonably safe to assume that if a person has a profile on here, advertising that theyre looking then they should hope to get some mail.

i dunno, is it so different with Mistresses.  with Masters and Doms there is no assumption to start with (at least i dont think there should be), people say hi, people say hi back, no assumptions made, lets chat for a bit....??? no?

why do Mistresses get to be so rude and arrogant. and why is it this guys fault when all he did was write to some bint who didnt write back, so he wrote again...., whats the crime in him pusuing an interest in someone on a dating site.  this guy doesnt owe her a damn thing and she has no business expecting him to follow some screwed up protocol when theyre not even past first base.... she needs to get over herself or put clearly in her profile how she handles mail.

OP - hang in there, basically, i reckon, if they havent the manners to write back, move on.


So you respond to all the spam mails in your regular email box? Tell them all politely that you don't want a replica watch, viagra, bigger tits, all that?

As dating site, A LOT OF PEOPLE here are not looking for dates, yourself included, so why should they be under obligation to respond?

Yes this guy doesn't owe her a thing, nor does she owe him a thing, not even a response.



Englishcrumpet -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 12:01:48 PM)

well, im assuming the woman he wrote to is looking for a date, a reasonable assumption around here on the whole.

and no i agree noone owes anyone anything on here at all, but when the guy has the temerity to write twice (shock horror) she sends him a shitty email back - WTF is all im saying!



crazyml -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 12:04:48 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: poise


"No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress,
you are still way ahead of everyone who isn’t trying."


ML "hearts" poise.



crazyml -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 12:09:12 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: servingyou91

It sounds like I deserved what I got.


Yep. But, in fairness to you, you seem likely to take it on the chin and learn from it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: servingyou91

I think I'm going to stick to what I do best for now. Uni.


Now listen brother, Uni is super important, and only an utter fuckwit would blow it by spending all his/her time chasing tail - but dammit to hell - All study and no punanu will make servingyou91 a very dull boy indeed.

Don't give up brother.

But... do (really really really) get yourself over the " I get super anxious." flim-flam.

I mean - christ on a stick, if you're not fucking it up, getting rejected, and making an ass of yourself during your uni years your future life will be emptier and more lacking in meaning than you know. Go for it.



LadyConstanze -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 12:15:19 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Englishcrumpet

well, im assuming the woman he wrote to is looking for a date, a reasonable assumption around here on the whole.

and no i agree noone owes anyone anything on here at all, but when the guy has the temerity to write twice (shock horror) she sends him a shitty email back - WTF is all im saying!


You know I state clearly I am involved, I am not looking, you know how many guys don't read that or think it's for others but not for them. And he wrote once, he didn't get a reply and then he sends her another one and she gets a bit testy, I can understand that. She's possibly flooded in CMails and it comes over as if he's pushing and he's dictating when she has to reply.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 12:21:14 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml


quote:

ORIGINAL: servingyou91

It sounds like I deserved what I got.


Yep. But, in fairness to you, you seem likely to take it on the chin and learn from it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: servingyou91

I think I'm going to stick to what I do best for now. Uni.


Now listen brother, Uni is super important, and only an utter fuckwit would blow it by spending all his/her time chasing tail - but dammit to hell - All study and no punanu will make servingyou91 a very dull boy indeed.

Don't give up brother.

But... do (really really really) get yourself over the " I get super anxious." flim-flam.

I mean - christ on a stick, if you're not fucking it up, getting rejected, and making an ass of yourself during your uni years your future life will be emptier and more lacking in meaning than you know. Go for it.


There, see? I told you the chicks would get you sorted, and here is Male Validation! [:)]



Englishcrumpet -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 12:23:02 PM)

yes i know, is why ive hidden mine, doesnt matter what you put in youre profile, theyll write anyway [8|]

i dont know, it just seems the guy is making some newbie mistakes and now he's kinda pulling back and thinking he should leave it be and thats kindof a shame.  we all make bloopers to start with, no biggie, live and learn.



LadyPact -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 12:58:03 PM)

One of many lessons about email.......

If you send a message to a Dominant woman and she does not respond, don't send another message to nag about why she didn't write back.  It's kind of irritating.



servingyou91 -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 6:20:30 PM)

Thanks for all the replies. I think I'm starting to get it now. Here's some of the things I gathered from the responses.

1) my actions did warrant irritation and it's no surprise she responded with attitude. There's nothing unhealthy about a little bit of attitude. Plus I deserved it.

2) my profile is somewhat creepy. Got to change it up a bit including both the pic and the about me. - cant believe I didn't realise this earlier.

3) stop sooking. It's unsexy.

4) work on my anxiety since it suggests desperation - I'm not desperate to meet a domme btw. There was a girl I know in year 10. We were pretty much best friends. If I'm desperate for anything it's to have something like that again.

5) try to meet girls at Uni. So that they can 'sort me out'. Whatever that means.

If I missed anything or if anything here is wrong feel free to let me know.



Karmastic -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 6:36:33 PM)

sorry haven't read much of thread, just skimmed a bit. OP, you didn't give enough context to give an informed opinion. based on the way you put it, she threw a hissy fit because you were too anxious. just be glad you didn't waste your time with someone who isn't right for you. good luck, and don't give up, she's out there. well, probably plenty out there that want what sounds like a puppy dog (no offense, just skimmed a bit).

EDIT ps - i just read your last post, had not seen it. i can't speak to any of that, except one thing. there's no excuse for lashing out in irritation to someone who's offering your themselves. that simply shows lack of character on her part, and again, count yourself lucky. you need who you need, who will admire that and want to mold you into what they want, that matches what you seek too.



MissAsylum -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 7:29:00 PM)

6) No response is a response.
quote:

ORIGINAL: servingyou91

Thanks for all the replies. I think I'm starting to get it now. Here's some of the things I gathered from the responses.

1) my actions did warrant irritation and it's no surprise she responded with attitude. There's nothing unhealthy about a little bit of attitude. Plus I deserved it.

2) my profile is somewhat creepy. Got to change it up a bit including both the pic and the about me. - cant believe I didn't realise this earlier.

3) stop sooking. It's unsexy.

4) work on my anxiety since it suggests desperation - I'm not desperate to meet a domme btw. There was a girl I know in year 10. We were pretty much best friends. If I'm desperate for anything it's to have something like that again.

5) try to meet girls at Uni. So that they can 'sort me out'. Whatever that means.

If I missed anything or if anything here is wrong feel free to let me know.




servingyou91 -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 7:44:14 PM)

I disagree with 6). She was going to reply, she said she wanted to put some thought into the response since I gave her a reason to with my first message.

That being said sometimes no response doesn't mean no reponse and sometimes it does. Thats the reason for my anxiousness.



LadyPact -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 7:46:16 PM)

Keep telling yourself that, dude.



MasterSlaveLA -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 7:48:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4

Why in the world would you call yourself an idiot...



Likely has a humiliation/degradation fetish, and this thread is feeding it.




MissAsylum -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 7:54:38 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Keep telling yourself that, dude.

This.

Pretty much summed up.



servingyou91 -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 8:13:36 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Keep telling yourself that, dude.


I'm not telling myself anything. I'm telling you what she told me. She could have been lying about it to make me feel better but I somehow doubt that since she wasn't exactly forgiving.
Besides. There's no logic behind 'no response is a response'. Lets say I send someone a message. Next day I don't have a response. So I conclude that no response is a response. I leave her alone, in fact I stop logging onto the website altogether because I believe she has no intention to contact me. Then the next day she sends her response. But I don't know about it so I don't log on.

This is what I mean by no response may or may not be a response. Sometimes it means 'I have nothing to say to you' and others it means 'busy atm'. This is what creates my anxiety.



subbyinlosangele -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 8:15:25 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Englishcrumpet

blimey! - well if the bird he wrote to and got ignored by wasnt enough!

im not great at writing back either, but then i put in my profile im not going to respond to anyone, because im fixed and not looking.

i would think that its reasonably safe to assume that if a person has a profile on here, advertising that theyre looking then they should hope to get some mail.

i dunno, is it so different with Mistresses. with Masters and Doms there is no assumption to start with (at least i dont think there should be), people say hi, people say hi back, no assumptions made, lets chat for a bit....??? no?

why do Mistresses get to be so rude and arrogant. and why is it this guys fault when all he did was write to some bint who didnt write back, so he wrote again...., whats the crime in him pusuing an interest in someone on a dating site. this guy doesnt owe her a damn thing and she has no business expecting him to follow some screwed up protocol when theyre not even past first base.... she needs to get over herself or put clearly in her profile how she handles mail.

OP - hang in there, basically, i reckon, if they havent the manners to write back, move on.



1. If you write to someone they are under no obligation to respond. In my opinion, if you're not interested, a non-response is better than a perfunctory "thanks but no thanks" which often just irritates people and leads to a nasty exchange.

2. People can handle mail anyway they want, and they don't have to announce to the world how they're doing to do it.

3. The OP sent an email and responded with another email one day later. What's wrong with that is it tends to turn people off -- if I were a domme, my first feeling would be that this sub is doing to be a pain-in-the-ass and high maintenance if he can't even wait 24 hours to see if someone will respond.



Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 8:30:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA
quote:

ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4
Why in the world would you call yourself an idiot...

Likely has a humiliation/degradation fetish, and this thread is feeding it.


Ditto



NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: Just got rejected by a dominant woman (5/14/2012 9:20:56 PM)

Okay, if I seem excessively insulting, I'm very sorry, but, since I don't know what you're really like in real life, this is what I see when I look at your profile.....

A main pic of you standing there grabbing your cock through your boxers, and toys and what looks like the left side of a bassinet in the picture. That makes me think you are just interested in your cock AND that you're married/in a relationship with a baby & looking to cheat.

Plus. everything except for two interests on your interests list to the left are kink-related. You seem cock- and kink-driven, which is more like a bottom than a submissive and bottoms are a dime a dozen where good submissives aren't always easy to find. That's just my opinion of course and your mileage may vary.

Maybe clean up the profile a little bit and add some vanilla interests, assuming that you have some. You didn't say what your letter to the Domme said, but check out the Ask a Mistress FAQ and that should help you in your approach. Good luck. [;)]

NBMG



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