Non-corporal punishment

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Non-corporal punishment

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Non-corporal punishment

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 8:35:54 AM

LadyMorgynn

Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline

I gave My slave a direct order not to shower before 7 a.m., as the downstairs neighbors work various shifts. The very next day, slave got up and took a shower at 5 a.m., while I was sleeping.

I don't do corporal punishment, but would love to hear any ideas for other creative punishments that would be appropriate for disobeying a direct order. He is an over-the-road trucker and is not currently at home, which makes things a little more tricky... I can't for instance put him in Time Out or set him to scrubbing the kitchen floor with a toothbrush, since he is not HERE.

_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

Post #: 1

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 8:39:08 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMorgynn
I can't for instance put him in Time Out or set him to scrubbing the kitchen floor with a toothbrush, since he is not HERE.

Well there's no reason you can't tell him to go to a time out in his place, or scrub his own floor.

Do you know why he did it? Did he just wake up and not think about it? My partner actually sets his PDA with alarms for those things all the time because he knows he will forget. To me that's more important.

But, assuming that you know and it's dealt with and you want punishment as some exclamation point for him- tell him your talking on the phone time will be cut by 15 minutes every day for a week because that is now his new shower time for that week.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 2

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 8:55:32 AM

LadyMorgynn

Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline

He did it because he has issues with being vain, and didn't want to leave the house with "bed head" (his words) from showering the night before. It was not a matter for forgetfulness. He decided that having his hair looking good was enough of an excuse to do what he wanted. Which really has ticked me off, not unnaturally :)

He lives with me when he's not on the road in his truck, and he won't be back for a several weeks, and I want something he can do *now* while he's still hurting from my expressed displeasure (<--euphymism) and his own conscience, because he knows good and well what he did was wrong, even though he consciously chose to do it, so now he's castigating himself even worse than I did. Drama queens! <rolling eyes>

Good idea about the phone time, though! That's going to hurt him, he lives for our phone conversations in the evening when he's parked for the night. I like :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMorgynn
I can't for instance put him in Time Out or set him to scrubbing the kitchen floor with a toothbrush, since he is not HERE.

Well there's no reason you can't tell him to go to a time out in his place, or scrub his own floor.

Do you know why he did it? Did he just wake up and not think about it? My partner actually sets his PDA with alarms for those things all the time because he knows he will forget. To me that's more important.

But, assuming that you know and it's dealt with and you want punishment as some exclamation point for him- tell him your talking on the phone time will be cut by 15 minutes every day for a week because that is now his new shower time for that week.

_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 3

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 9:26:07 AM

NastyDaddy

Posts: 957
Joined: 9/8/2004
Status: offline

Since you desire methods of non-corporal negative reinforcement, let the object of the infraction also be a part of the punishment where applicable. LA suggested a great way to limit his access to you while on the road. This will affect him sure, but unfortunately the same affects you... as you both lose 15 minutes of contact.

Consider that he only shower with cold water until instructed otherwise while home or on the road.
no soap...
no shampoo...
no brush...

When and if you run out of shower related variables, expand to the entire bathroom...

If you want to be mean, no toilet paper for him... he can take a dump and then a cold shower...
no shaving cream...
no electric razor...
no bathroom lights...

Lots of room for assaulting vanity or making your point vividly clear. Out of options in the bathroom... on to the remainder of the home... the more negative, especially redundantly negative... the more vivid your point or position.

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 4

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 10:43:32 AM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

I think you have a bigger problem than just determining the type of non-corporal punishment!

He willfully disobeyed your instruction! This wasn't an disobedience of choices to make you happy. It was your will or his... He choose His! For HIS reasons. Your desire to be considerate to your neighbor was secondary to his vanity. He also considered that any consequence from you wouldd be secondary as well. In other words, Is Vanity was Worth more than the consequence he percieved you would be willing to give him.

You must ensure than any consequence from you better be of intense value to him. This consequence will relate to on important it was for you to be considerate to your neighbor. He will also equate this value to how important he must adhere to your will in this regard and very likely other areas as well.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 5

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 11:03:12 AM

heartfeltsub

Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline

my question, and i realize that i am not a Master, but if he was willing to disobey in your presence your express command, how do you know any discipline (punishment) that you require will actually occur outside of your presence (ie will he do as you say while you are not there?)

just curious.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 6

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 11:45:48 AM

NINASHARP

Posts: 295
Joined: 4/23/2006
From: NJ/NYC
Status: offline

Since you can't be there to be sure he is following your orders, I'm also curious what other means of punishment that will be suggested on this thread. Though I would say no shower on the day he is expected to return home. Yet usually punishment is often best if you do it right after the disobedience.

Nina

_____________________________

My stiletto boots fit like gloves around his wrists.. as I locked them on I knew we were a match!

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 7

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 12:55:34 PM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline

This might be over the top but if how his hair look is that important to him... why not shave it off? Then he wouldn't have to worry about having bed head in the morning.

Just a thought

kisha

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to NINASHARP)

Post #: 8

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 1:02:43 PM

TheShadows

Posts: 403
Joined: 9/16/2004
From: Southern Illinois
Status: offline

We owned a painslut for a while, and had to become creative in our punishments. One of my favorites is to instruct the disobedient submissive/slave to write sentences, or copy definitions out of a dictionary, in relation to the infraction.

Ex. - "I will not disobey Mistress by placing my vanity before Her commands."
Ex. - The full dictionary definition of obedience, vanity, or whatever word you so choose.

Make him write that 500 times. He can do this while he's stopped, and it also provides proof that the punishment was carried out for your later inspection. I'm sure he won't soon forget.

Best of luck,

TheShadows

_____________________________

"The reason the mainstream is thought of as a stream is because of it's shallowness." - George Carlin

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most..." - Ozzy Osbourne

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 9

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 1:03:35 PM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

He did it because he has issues with being vain, and didn't want to leave the house with "bed head" (his words) from showering the night before. It was not a matter for forgetfulness. He decided that having his hair looking good was enough of an excuse to do what he wanted. Which really has ticked me off, not unnaturally :)

I have a friend that went through the vanity thing.. his girl was always causing them to be late due to her "need" to get her hair and make up just so... So...he took them away from her, she wasn't allowed to wear any make, no curling the hair, no shaving the legs... nothing. This went on for about a month and he took her to the munches, out to dinner and to many places where she was terribly embarrassed over her appearance.. and no, she wasn't allowed to wear pants to cover up her unshaven legs either. (and believe me, this was one hairy girl) Yes... she did learn her lesson. I would suggest that as big of an issue the disobeying was.. an even bigger issue is the vanity. I would suggest that when he is with you that you specifically make him go out with "bed head", perhaps even wrinkled clothes... he has to learn that his pride in his appearance needs to take a back seat to your wishes. It may take doing this for a while before he understands. Granted punishment is best dealt out as soon as possible.. but lessons take time to sink in.

When he gets back and you decide it's time to go out... tell him it's go as you are or spend the rest of the evening standing in a corner.

Wishing you the best LM...

Jewel

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 10

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 7:13:13 PM

ArchangelMichael

Posts: 243
Joined: 8/21/2004
From: New Orleans, LA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShiftedJewel

quote:

He did it because he has issues with being vain, and didn't want to leave the house with "bed head" (his words) from showering the night before. It was not a matter for forgetfulness. He decided that having his hair looking good was enough of an excuse to do what he wanted. Which really has ticked me off, not unnaturally :)

I have a friend that went through the vanity thing.. his girl was always causing them to be late due to her "need" to get her hair and make up just so... So...he took them away from her, she wasn't allowed to wear any make, no curling the hair, no shaving the legs... nothing. This went on for about a month and he took her to the munches, out to dinner and to many places where she was terribly embarrassed over her appearance.. and no, she wasn't allowed to wear pants to cover up her unshaven legs either. (and believe me, this was one hairy girl) Yes... she did learn her lesson. I would suggest that as big of an issue the disobeying was.. an even bigger issue is the vanity. I would suggest that when he is with you that you specifically make him go out with "bed head", perhaps even wrinkled clothes... he has to learn that his pride in his appearance needs to take a back seat to your wishes. It may take doing this for a while before he understands. Granted punishment is best dealt out as soon as possible.. but lessons take time to sink in.

When he gets back and you decide it's time to go out... tell him it's go as you are or spend the rest of the evening standing in a corner.

Wishing you the best LM...

Jewel

Is it really vanity to want to look halfway decent? I have issues with going out when I have bedhead, too. I tend to take a long time in the shower/bathroom because I have OCD, though. It's not a vanity thing. I had more of an issue with bedhead when I worked retail. Since I'm now working in a restaurant where I have to wear a hat, I don't much care if I have bedhead. Getting to work on time is more important.

I know this thread is about punishments, but don't most Dominants want their subs to look good/decent?

_____________________________

"Open up your mind; Let your fantasies unwind." -The Phantom, Phantom of the Opera

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." -Toulouse-Lautrec, Moulin Rouge

(in reply to ShiftedJewel)

Post #: 11

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 7:22:37 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear LadyMorgynn, Ladies and Gentlemen;

My question is--why does the punishment have to be done immediately? Nothing requires an immediate punishment. It isn't like an animal who has a brief attention span.

Punishment can be exacted when he returns home. Patience can work on your behalf as he can stew over his misdeeds for as long as you wish.

Kneeling on rice, bird seed--or in a squat and stay in it for a good while works nicely. Shaving the head was mentioned but, that might be a boundary.

One thing that is at a disadvantage of dominants, are the slaves/submissives who do not live on premise, on the road and such--I doubt if anybody away from the direct observation honestly applies the same punishment on themselves as you apply to them.

He can pay a fine, short time on the phone but, I would keep no time on the phone for drastic issues. You always want to be able to have more severe measures on the ready.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 12

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 7:25:49 PM

LadyMorgynn

Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline

It is when it causes the slave to disobey a DIRECT ORDER. And I'm sorry, but it is for the Mistress to decide what looks decent and what does not. If I want him to go out unbrushed, unshaven and wrinkly, he should obey. He might not be happy with it, but he should obey. Not that I would ever do so, personally, but that's not the point. It's the principle of the thing.

The slave in question, btw, does not suffer from "bed head"... his hair looks terrific first thing in the morning, I wish mine looked half as good! He does suffer from an excess of conceit/vanity, and I'm sorry, but when his vanity takes precedence over my expressed wish, it has nothing at all to do with looking good, and does indeed become about disobedience!

quote:

ORIGINAL: ArchangelMichael
Is it really vanity to want to look halfway decent? I have issues with going out when I have bedhead, too. I tend to take a long time in the shower/bathroom because I have OCD, though. It's not a vanity thing. I had more of an issue with bedhead when I worked retail. Since I'm now working in a restaurant where I have to wear a hat, I don't much care if I have bedhead. Getting to work on time is more important.

I know this thread is about punishments, but don't most Dominants want their subs to look good/decent?

_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to ArchangelMichael)

Post #: 13

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 7:32:04 PM

LadyMorgynn

Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline

Not all the punishment will be done immediately. For instance, he is going to be scrubbing my kitchen floor with a toothbrush when he returns home. In the meantime, however, there should be swift consequences to deliberate disobedience, to keep the infraction fresh in his mind and letting him know that he's not getting away with anything even though he is not here for me to punish right now. I did like the suggestions above addressing the vanity issue, and he is now spending the next 5 days using no soap, shampoo or toothpaste, and not looking in the mirror, as well as some writing assignments. He really does have gorgeous hair, and I don't want to shave it, but I was sorely tempted, I swear, just to teach him a lesson. I did tell him that he was lucky that I liked his hair so much!

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs

Dear LadyMorgynn, Ladies and Gentlemen;

My question is--why does the punishment have to be done immediately? Nothing requires an immediate punishment. It isn't like an animal who has a brief attention span.

Punishment can be exacted when he returns home. Patience can work on your behalf as he can stew over his misdeeds for as long as you wish.

Kneeling on rice, bird seed--or in a squat and stay in it for a good while works nicely. Shaving the head was mentioned but, that might be a boundary.

One thing that is at a disadvantage of dominants, are the slaves/submissives who do not live on premise, on the road and such--I doubt if anybody away from the direct observation honestly applies the same punishment on themselves as you apply to them.

He can pay a fine, short time on the phone but, I would keep no time on the phone for drastic issues. You always want to be able to have more severe measures on the ready.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to LadyHugs)

Post #: 14

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 8:50:13 PM

Estring

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Let the air out of his tires.

_____________________________

Boycott Whales!

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 15

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 9:40:08 PM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

He did it because he has issues with being vain, and didn't want to leave the house with "bed head" (his words) from showering the night before. It was not a matter for forgetfulness. He decided that having his hair looking good was enough of an excuse to do what he wanted. Which really has ticked me off, not unnaturally :)

I would say that if he's that vain and the hair is that big a reason for his disobedience...CUT IT OFF!!! Truckstops have computer stations where he can send you pictures and the receipt from the barber. I personally would go with the military 1/4 inch. If he's gone for more than a week or so it should be just barely getting back to normal when he returns. Then you can decide if he deserved to keep it or if you want to grab a can of shaving cream and a straight razor.
Contact me on the other side if he gives you any guff about truckstops, I work in the industry and can track down full service facilities rather easily. Satelite tracking is a BEAUTIFUL thing. he he

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 16

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 9:50:07 PM

LadyMorgynn

Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline

Yeah, I know, but it really is gorgeous hair! Cutting it off would be a sin... it'd hurt me almost as bad as it hurt him! LOL! I'm saving it in reserve, hanging it over his head as a threat if he ever forgets himself again!

quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U
I would say that if he's that vain and the hair is that big a reason for his disobedience...CUT IT OFF!!! Truckstops have computer stations where he can send you pictures and the receipt from the barber. I personally would go with the military 1/4 inch. If he's gone for more than a week or so it should be just barely getting back to normal when he returns. Then you can decide if he deserved to keep it or if you want to grab a can of shaving cream and a straight razor.
Contact me on the other side if he gives you any guff about truckstops, I work in the industry and can track down full service facilities rather easily. Satelite tracking is a BEAUTIFUL thing. he he

_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to theRose4U)

Post #: 17

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 9:50:56 PM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

Enforce the shower the night before or no vanity showering for a week. Somehow re inforce it so he can't just do it when you are asleep.

Or make him wash with abucket of water for soaping and a bucket of water for rinsing, in the sink only.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMorgynn

He did it because he has issues with being vain, and didn't want to leave the house with "bed head" (his words) from showering the night before. It was not a matter for forgetfulness. He decided that having his hair looking good was enough of an excuse to do what he wanted. Which really has ticked me off, not unnaturally :)

He lives with me when he's not on the road in his truck, and he won't be back for a several weeks, and I want something he can do *now* while he's still hurting from my expressed displeasure (<--euphymism) and his own conscience, because he knows good and well what he did was wrong, even though he consciously chose to do it, so now he's castigating himself even worse than I did. Drama queens! <rolling eyes>

Good idea about the phone time, though! That's going to hurt him, he lives for our phone conversations in the evening when he's parked for the night. I like :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMorgynn
I can't for instance put him in Time Out or set him to scrubbing the kitchen floor with a toothbrush, since he is not HERE.

Well there's no reason you can't tell him to go to a time out in his place, or scrub his own floor.

Do you know why he did it? Did he just wake up and not think about it? My partner actually sets his PDA with alarms for those things all the time because he knows he will forget. To me that's more important.

But, assuming that you know and it's dealt with and you want punishment as some exclamation point for him- tell him your talking on the phone time will be cut by 15 minutes every day for a week because that is now his new shower time for that week.

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 18

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 10:12:19 PM

brightspot

Posts: 3052
Status: offline

Hi LadyM.
If you or someone you know has PaintShopPro it would be great to take a picture of him one where is hair looks it's most gorgeous, digitally change it in differenet awful cuts, colors, and even shaven. Make it into a a series of wallet sized photo's and then place it on larger paper. Place it in a prominant place so that he see it when he comes back and explain to him that everytime he defies a direct order from you because he put his vanity first, the first pic will happen to his hair and on down the line everytime that happens.
He not only then has the visual right in front of him, but others who see it will no doubt find it hysterical and can in turn rib him or humiliate him a bit.

*Brightspot

_____________________________

"Comedy is NOT Pretty!" ~Peter Nelson

But..."May at Least One person have a sense of Humor!" ~KML.

http://360.yahoo.com/my_profile-TD4TwEw8crWS3GHFDcs_DK1rHmW6Dq_E;_ylt=Av2PfG9gH0wkQrMPivuMCivGAOJ3

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)

Post #: 19

RE: Non-corporal punishment - 6/6/2006 10:26:46 PM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

Not at the cost of him doing what he wishes, cause HE WISHES against his DOMS WISHES.

That's what hair brushes are for. wash your hair night before dampen a brush and brush your hair. do not go against your dominants wished because *he* wanted to.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ArchangelMichael

[Is it really vanity to want to look halfway decent? I have issues with going out when I have bedhead, too. I tend to take a long time in the shower/bathroom because I have OCD, though. It's not a vanity thing. I had more of an issue with bedhead when I worked retail. Since I'm now working in a restaurant where I have to wear a hat, I don't much care if I have bedhead. Getting to work on time is more important.

I know this thread is about punishments, but don't most Dominants want their subs to look good/decent?

< Message edited by FelinePersuasion -- 6/6/2006 10:31:03 PM >

(in reply to ArchangelMichael)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Non-corporal punishment

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.094