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RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 7:00:39 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		I would say as far as online goes, I require tribute for My time. Meaning, I have had conversations with people to see if our interests are the same or if they can even afford My services. I wouldn't require tribute to exchange correspondence for the first time. Not now anyway, when I was younger and stupid I might have,lol. They can show themselves to Me on cam to prove they are a real person, but as far as how dedicated they are to really wanting to serve Me, well that is to be seen and is totally up to them.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 7:14:04 PM   
OneKinkyArtist


Posts: 132
Joined: 6/19/2012
Status: offline 		being a grammer Nazi doesn't get my question answered

_____________________________

Self expression is the key that opens the door to communication....

I would like to think of you as more than a dickhead....but I have limited thinking at this moment

in case you didnt get the memo Im not your average anything

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 8:02:00 PM   
ReMakeYou


Posts: 147
Joined: 1/20/2012
Status: offline 		Think about it this way. If you met a girl on here who seemed great, but needed you to front her some cash to get her out of Nigeria, what would you do?

Have the same attitude towards girls who seem great, but demand tribute before they'll take you seriously.

(Not that I've seen a findomme who gave off a personality beyond her D/s self, but since neither of us would match well with the other, the point is moot.)

As for why there are so many of them, ask yourself who wouldn't be tempted by the prospect of free money.

(in reply to OneKinkyArtist)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 8:31:17 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm afraid I'm not the one to help you with this. I don't gauge a person's potential as a submissive by money they can send Me. Generally, My first engagement with someone is to tell them what munch I will be at next. If they don't have a scheduling conflict, I expect them to show up.

I do watch how people treat the wait staff. I notice if he checks the level of My drink during the meal. If there is a play party following, I see how he treats others there as well. The person gets bonus points if they offer to help out in some way, making sure that I don't mind if he goes to do so. I look for stuff like opening doors for Me, asking Me if there is something in particular that I would like him to do, etc.

The money thing has just never been a part of My evaluation.

This. ^^^^ I totally agree and I'm the same way. I've never considered asking for or accepting money at all. I do watch how they act and treat other people though.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Privileged
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
quote:

ORIGINAL: Privileged
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
...Starting out proving someone has the money to send, doesn't mean they are willing or good at anything other than sending some money.

No lie detected.

I expect tribute on contact if I'm approached via messenger. If a sub doesn't adhere to that rule, it says something about his character. Not necessarily his "authenticity"

Because I am a nitpicker extraordinaire, I have to say I don't see any service offers in your profile. Perhaps an edit is in order?

Excuse me?

I quoted your reply and said "no lie detected" meaning, true/fact/I agree. The rest was to the OP.

I have to admit that, when I first read that response, I wondered why you were talking to Lockit like she's a sub because she's NOT. You didn't clarify that you changed horses in mid-stream there.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 8:31:32 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OneKinkyArtist

I ask this question as I peruse through the dommes in my city that pique my interest and what I find is that all of the ones Ive seen are professional or financial Dominants.


So there are no lifestyle Dommes you find attractive, only the pros?

Any ideas why that might be?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to OneKinkyArtist)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 8:36:50 PM   
seekingOwnertoo


Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OneKinkyArtist

I ask this question as I peruse through the dommes in my city that pique my interest and what I find is that all of the ones Ive seen are professional or financial Dominants. Now while I cant knock what the next person does I can say that I am at a lost for words on how disheartening it is for that to be so. I fancy myself a honest and true person , yet it is hard to find a Female Dominant when you dont have the money to allow them to control. I have many other uses both sexully and non sexually that I feel could be of major use. COuld anyone help me under stand this "phenomenon"


Yes, I can explain it.. But understand it is from my perspective. Which of course, is highly slanted toward my personal Experience.

1. Collar Me is a free site. There is no cost, or skin in the game, to post a profile here. So every voyeur does. So does every con artist … some of them convicted.

2. There are people who make money selling the "how to scam online" routine. Ten years ago there were trail blazers in this regard, now the scams are fairly ubiquitous, and not so unique. Some are even men, mascaraing as women; or a couple, with the woman making phone calls.

3. How to scam men, 101, teaches the easiest way is to pose as a Domme. Men will send money on the “tribute to prove you are sincere routine”. And when they realize the Domme is … collecting the money with nothing required, the man will not report it to the authorities, because he is afraid of his personal reputation.

Conclusion: never pay money unless You are meeting a Pro Domme in person. There ARE a few legit ones here. But they are hard to find among the cons and thieves. A good Pro Domme is a real Dominant Lady. One who as a child had Her Barbie, whipping Her ken doll! ROFL Hint: Good Pro's want to talk to you on the phone, before making a "date". (No tribute required!) And trust me on this, i HAVE met some of the "Most Renowned" in the Land!

Had to add .. i met a local Pro Domme a couple months ago. She met ME for DINNER at a nice restaurant. We had a great conversation, and of course, I declined a date for future "play", for reasons we need not post. But the point is ... it did not cost me anything, other than Dinner at a nice restaurant. And a few non Pro's I know, have have the same ... treat! Just a typical night out, is my best description.

Best conclusion though: Go to munches or other events. While I don’t frequent them, even Pro Dommes have told me at some, there are more Women than men. And THAT is a nice ratio that I would favor, as a single man! ROFL

Yet always treat a Domme You meet as a Lady. Be classy and ask about Her. Just as you would a vanilla girl. It will get you a LOT farther. :-)

Good luck!



< Message edited by seekingOwnertoo -- 7/11/2012 9:10:38 PM >

(in reply to OneKinkyArtist)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:03:10 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OneKinkyArtist

being a grammer Nazi doesn't get my question answered



??

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to OneKinkyArtist)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:12:17 PM   
Privileged


Posts: 49
Joined: 11/8/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm afraid I'm not the one to help you with this. I don't gauge a person's potential as a submissive by money they can send Me. Generally, My first engagement with someone is to tell them what munch I will be at next. If they don't have a scheduling conflict, I expect them to show up.

I do watch how people treat the wait staff. I notice if he checks the level of My drink during the meal. If there is a play party following, I see how he treats others there as well. The person gets bonus points if they offer to help out in some way, making sure that I don't mind if he goes to do so. I look for stuff like opening doors for Me, asking Me if there is something in particular that I would like him to do, etc.

The money thing has just never been a part of My evaluation.

This. ^^^^ I totally agree and I'm the same way. I've never considered asking for or accepting money at all. I do watch how they act and treat other people though.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Privileged
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
quote:

ORIGINAL: Privileged
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
...Starting out proving someone has the money to send, doesn't mean they are willing or good at anything other than sending some money.

No lie detected.

I expect tribute on contact if I'm approached via messenger. If a sub doesn't adhere to that rule, it says something about his character. Not necessarily his "authenticity"

Because I am a nitpicker extraordinaire, I have to say I don't see any service offers in your profile. Perhaps an edit is in order?

Excuse me?

I quoted your reply and said "no lie detected" meaning, true/fact/I agree. The rest was to the OP.

I have to admit that, when I first read that response, I wondered why you were talking to Lockit like she's a sub because she's NOT. You didn't clarify that you changed horses in mid-stream there.

NBMG


She didn't think the latter message applied to her. She attacked me for the observation/suggestion I posted.
Why? I suppose I'll never know.

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:27:20 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Privileged, I had a hard time understanding what you were saying, and who it was directed to. Slang doesn't always translate well, even when it's explained.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to Privileged)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:40:44 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		Totally.

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:51:22 PM   
Privileged


Posts: 49
Joined: 11/8/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Privileged, I had a hard time understanding what you were saying, and who it was directed to. Slang doesn't always translate well, even when it's explained.


Understandable but, after reading everything she said after I explained, do you think slang is the issue?

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:52:14 PM   
OneKinkyArtist


Posts: 132
Joined: 6/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven


quote:

ORIGINAL: OneKinkyArtist

I ask this question as I peruse through the dommes in my city that pique my interest and what I find is that all of the ones Ive seen are professional or financial Dominants.


So there are no lifestyle Dommes you find attractive, only the pros?

Any ideas why that might be?


I'm not sure where you got that idea from. Seems like you're looking for something that isn't there. Good luck with that!


_____________________________

Self expression is the key that opens the door to communication....

I would like to think of you as more than a dickhead....but I have limited thinking at this moment

in case you didnt get the memo Im not your average anything

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:54:46 PM   
OneKinkyArtist


Posts: 132
Joined: 6/19/2012
Status: offline 		It's amazing how stupid a thread can turn!

_____________________________

Self expression is the key that opens the door to communication....

I would like to think of you as more than a dickhead....but I have limited thinking at this moment

in case you didnt get the memo Im not your average anything

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 9:56:12 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		You started it!

So, you're saying that Chicago, where you live, has no female dominants that are not professionals?

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to OneKinkyArtist)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 10:44:28 PM   
seekingreality


Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OneKinkyArtist

I ask this question as I peruse through the dommes in my city that pique my interest and what I find is that all of the ones Ive seen are professional or financial Dominants. Now while I cant knock what the next person does I can say that I am at a lost for words on how disheartening it is for that to be so. I fancy myself a honest and true person , yet it is hard to find a Female Dominant when you dont have the money to allow them to control. I have many other uses both sexully and non sexually that I feel could be of major use. COuld anyone help me under stand this "phenomenon"



Financial/pro dommes don't want to test your submission; they want to sell you a service.

There are plenty of non-professional dommes. However, many men find it difficult to find one who is compatible and the process can take years.


(in reply to OneKinkyArtist)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/11/2012 11:34:33 PM   
fetisheden


Posts: 274
Joined: 1/25/2011
Status: offline 		right.this



quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality


quote:

ORIGINAL: OneKinkyArtist

I ask this question as I peruse through the dommes in my city that pique my interest and what I find is that all of the ones Ive seen are professional or financial Dominants. Now while I cant knock what the next person does I can say that I am at a lost for words on how disheartening it is for that to be so. I fancy myself a honest and true person , yet it is hard to find a Female Dominant when you dont have the money to allow them to control. I have many other uses both sexully and non sexually that I feel could be of major use. COuld anyone help me under stand this "phenomenon"



Financial/pro dommes don't want to test your submission; they want to sell you a service.

There are plenty of non-professional dommes. However, many men find it difficult to find one who is compatible and the process can take years.





_____________________________

http://losangelesblackdominatrix.com
http://findomme.blogspot.com
http://blackmailfetish.blogspot.com
www.twitter.com/fetisheden

(in reply to seekingreality)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/12/2012 6:00:31 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven


quote:

ORIGINAL: OneKinkyArtist

I ask this question as I peruse through the dommes in my city that pique my interest and what I find is that all of the ones Ive seen are professional or financial Dominants.


So there are no lifestyle Dommes you find attractive, only the pros?

Any ideas why that might be?


If I can venture an idea - might have to do with the pics, if a guy expects a model gorgeous domme with all the equipment and a session a la carte and be instantly accepted, he's better prepared to pay for it.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/12/2012 8:00:27 AM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Privileged


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Well fuck wench, I didn't realize I needed a lie detector.

Who the fuck are you to tell the op what to put in his profile? He doesn't have to have anything about service provisions in his profile, nor does he have to answer to you... now does he?


Lemme try this again: "No lies detected" is an expression. Are you as offended when people agree by saying "THIS"? Because it means the same thing.

I have some questions:
Are everyone's observations and suggestions unwelcome? Or just mine?
Why are you swearing and calling me names?
What are you really pressed about?





It seems you don't know me as well as I know you. I cuss... often. When I am happy, when I am not happy, when I fucking feel like it. See? Wench is an expression. I use it when I am happy, when someone is evil in a good way or bad way, when I love someone and when I don't. I did in fact think you were talking to me as you gave no indication that you were talking to two people, until you explained it. Even then I thought it odd that you would use that expression with me, as if I needed validation or agreement on what I said, coming from someone I have seen lie on these forums. I don't need agreement from someone that lies. It might not be wise to make me prove that because I can, then everyone would see what I have seen. Okay Miss M...a? I can do it with things from this current profile and off site. Some of us do get around.

Whatever people think about the op's post or things said... he is speaking about not wanting a findom, therefore calling him to task on what is in his profile or not on his profile wouldn't pertain to what you wish to see there. You can say whatever you want. Just as you responded to me and used what I said to make a comment, I just didn't care for you using what I said and following it up with a comment I would never agree with or make under these specific circumstances. Combining the two with what I have seen of you with how you used an expression and those things alone were the reason I said what I did. I wasn't pressed about anything else. I thought it ironic that someone that I feel has lied was validating what I said and claiming it not to be a lie or agreeing with it.

I would have said nothing to you had you not included what I said in your comments to two people, even if I thought of you as I do. I respect some findom's and have never had a problem with them. Others, I don't respect, I don't often have anything to say to them and don't say anything. To each their own... but with you... well... I just find your absolute statements and misrepresentation of yourself... worthy of a response when you quote me.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to Privileged)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/12/2012 10:22:24 AM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		OP, you still didn't answer My question. I'm not sure if it was a fast reply or what, but you said something about grammar nazi to Me? I wasn't aware that I corrected your grammar. Grammar Nazi-ing is a whole different thread.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Is being a Pro/FinDomme the only way to test a pros... - 7/12/2012 10:56:28 AM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Well fuck wench, I didn't realize I needed a lie detector.

Who the fuck are you to tell the op what to put in his profile? He doesn't have to have anything about service provisions in his profile, nor does he have to answer to you... now does he?


I'm not one to get in the middle of a good cat fight, but I will say that when I read this response, I thought it was a bit strong for what had come before it.

Like others, I didn't understand the "No lie detected" comment, but I didn't think it was worthy of attack.

But based on your other comments, it seems like there is some history between the two of you, so I think the rest of us don't know the full story of what's actually going on here. But lacking that history, I probably would have been offended if someone started a comment to me with the words "Well fuck wench".

To quote the late Rodney King, "Can't we all just get along?"

< Message edited by Rochsub2009 -- 7/12/2012 10:57:58 AM >

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 40
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