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Is being in love important in D/s relationship ?


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Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/16/2012 8:05:21 PM   
CuckoldSameh


Posts: 29
Joined: 6/12/2006
Status: offline 		Can I ask a question ? In a Mistress/ slave relationship is it necessary that a slave and a Mistress be in love ?
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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/16/2012 8:18:35 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Of course not. They can have whatever relationship works for them, romantic or otherwise.

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/16/2012 8:33:16 PM   
Kaiel


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuckoldSameh

Can I ask a question ? In a Mistress/ slave relationship is it necessary that a slave and a Mistress be in love ?


No, but I prefer it when My slaves love Me... it gives Me warm fuzzies ;)

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I keep My expectations and thread counts high- "catitude"

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/16/2012 8:54:28 PM   
Tantriqu


Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline 		Love? No. But it's grand when it happens.
However, I absolutely have to lust for and really like the men I do things to.

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"Then I did the simplest thing in the world. I leaned down... and kissed him. And the world cracked open." - Agnes de Mille

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/16/2012 10:07:46 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		In love? No. It's nice when affection occurs, but it's not necessary.

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/18/2012 12:01:33 AM   
CougarRick


Posts: 288
Joined: 5/5/2012
Status: offline 		I don't know. On one hand the idea of a sort of one sided love where a sub adores his dom yet has to bust his ass for any signs of affection in return can sound exciting. On the other, it might get depressing if after a few months, the dom never showed any sign of feelings. I guess from my opinion, I would want feelings back, but at the same time I would want to have to earn them.

Sort of like a schoolboy crush, where the dom finds the guy faintly amusing, could potentially have feelings for him if he wasn't sort of annoying and in need of a slap once in awhile. She often slaps him down, but every once in awhile softens and shows some tenderness, particularly if he has pleased her.


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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/18/2012 5:23:09 AM   
pyschosubmission


Posts: 1109
Joined: 7/6/2012
From: Glasgow, Scotland
Status: offline 		As with anything in life, whatever you find works for you :)

Personally though any relationship I get into, there has to be some form of love involved. Just the way I'm wired

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/18/2012 5:32:05 AM   
xLaChienne


Posts: 259
Joined: 11/12/2011
Status: offline 		No, it's not necessary for all.

For some, it is.



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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/18/2012 10:00:46 AM   
MsGypsey


Posts: 113
Joined: 8/23/2011
Status: offline 		Like Amy said: "Love is a losing game".
Although my one caveat would be: "sometimes". Sometimes it is part of a relationship and sometimes it isn't. You simply don't have that level of control over it.

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/18/2012 12:19:01 PM   
MistressAlishaG


Posts: 1
Joined: 3/19/2012
Status: offline 		Is love important in a D/s relationship? Yes. Is love necessary in a D/s relationship? No.
I prefer my relationships be built on a loving emotional foundation. Those always seem to work the best for me.

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/18/2012 12:54:20 PM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline 		As others have said: No, not inherently. For some partnerships it is, for others not. It just depends.

On a personal note: Not for me, no. Can it be a nice factor? Sure, but it's not needed and isn't particularly desired.

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/19/2012 5:11:52 AM   
MsSylverdawn


Posts: 147
Joined: 9/26/2011
Status: offline 		Love in the sense that you must have a connection and care about and for your submissive yes..their physical, emotional and mental wellbeing... yes... IN love no...

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/19/2012 5:14:07 AM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline 		The way you define love is important. I have submitted to many people that I am not in love with in the romantic sense but I think of love as being more complex and in that sense I have never submitted to someone I don't love.

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/19/2012 10:59:59 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuckoldSameh

Can I ask a question ? In a Mistress/ slave relationship is it necessary that a slave and a Mistress be in love ?


In all honesty I don't give fuckall about being IN love. To ME, IN love is fleeting and mostly hormone based.

And it tends to be far too conditional for my liking.

< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 7/19/2012 11:00:18 AM >

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/19/2012 1:11:44 PM   
Char2688


Posts: 151
Joined: 4/16/2012
Status: offline 		nope, you dont have to trust them either, not necessary,
but
it helps a lot

(in reply to LaTigresse)
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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/20/2012 1:31:59 PM   
SaharahEve


Posts: 231
Joined: 6/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuckoldSameh
Can I ask a question ? In a Mistress/ slave relationship is it necessary that a slave and a Mistress be in love ?


No. That doesn't mean a mistress can't love her slave on some level, however. But be "in love" with her slave? I suppose some will say they can be, but it's a difficult thing to accomplish, being real with "slavery" and being head over heals in love with someone on all fronts at the same time.

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Saharah


S a h a r a h E v e . c o m

nanshakh.com



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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/20/2012 6:11:33 PM   
seekingOwnertoo


Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline
Your question is very multi-dimensional. And that multi-dimensional word means a LOT of different things! LOL

If you are asking me, can I become the slave of a Lady? The answer is, yes, if I fall in love (or infatuation) for a Lady who strikes my fancy. Then I would be willing to go to the ends of the earth for Her. In my own life, this point was proven to me by a Lady a bit north and east of me! So I know it can be done. What is required though, is a unique mental and emotional connection! And that is rare.

Then again, going to the ends of the earth for Her …. could only mean submission, not slave, too! ROFL

So the flip side of the question is, can I be a usable submissive, without love?

Again, the answer is multi-dimensional!

But the bottom line is that if She satisfies my … Vanilla and non-Vanilla needs and desires; then it could be a LTR. Because no love is required to satisfy mutual need and desire!

And those are only two of the multiple dimensions …

The bottom line is that a variety of different relationships can exist through out your life; for a wide variety of different reasons.

It is what it is … so work to satisfy Yourself!

(in reply to CuckoldSameh)
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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/20/2012 8:45:02 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuckoldSameh

Can I ask a question ? In a Mistress/ slave relationship is it necessary that a slave and a Mistress be in love ?


I havent checked the rulebook yet, but I dont think there is a rule for this one. Some will say yes, some will say no. However, what works for an anonymous internet someone might not mean a thing for you and yours.

For my personal relationships, it has not been necessary for the slave to be in love with me. Fox is, and he is my husband. Angel never was in love with me, even though he was mine for several years. It all depends on how things work with the specific person, not a general one kink fits all answer.

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/21/2012 12:45:15 AM   
Faythless


Posts: 41
Joined: 1/31/2012
Status: offline 		Being in love is not important or necessary although I'm sure a liking at least should be involved although not in a sexual way, unless that is what you're wanting.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
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RE: Is being in love important in D/s relationship ? - 7/21/2012 8:24:27 AM   
Soyokaze


Posts: 390
Joined: 4/1/2007
Status: offline 		For me, it's necessary in a long term relationship. If it's just a friendship, that occasionally involves play then it's not. As others have said, there's not going to be one sound rule for everyone; it has varying degrees of importance and even different meanings.

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"When I was a little kid, I wish the first word I ever said was 'quote' so right before I died I could say 'end quote'" -Steven Wright

(in reply to Faythless)
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