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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 6:29:57 PM

kalikshama

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< Message edited by kalikshama -- 7/23/2012 6:32:47 PM >

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 6:55:39 PM

RumpusParable

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Not sure how many folks will identify with this. Just throwing it out there for opinions.

Especially on the Ask A Mistress board, we get a lot of posts that ask if anybody has ever done kink X? No matter what people come up with, I'm pretty sure that somebody on CM has done it. One of the sadists or masochists here will be able to say yes.

This got Me thinking. Do you ever feel it would be easier to say that you haven't done a, b, and c, instead of trying to list all of the stuff that you have ever done?

I'm a later in life sadist. I know what My "I've done it" list looks like. I can not even begin to imagine what those lists would look like for people who have been doing this twenty years or more.

Thoughts and comments welcome.

Yes, I find it easier to say "haven't done X, Y or Z" rather than listing what I have tried. I'm an experience slut so I am constantly trying new things. In June I tried 5 new things: scat, which has long been on my hard limits; being suspended in silks, engaging in public masturbation at an orgasm contest (and winning a prize for Longest Continuous Orgasm), watersports with an audience, and a 5-female orgy.

Next year at that event I'm going to have another list of new things to try.

< Message edited by RumpusParable -- 7/23/2012 6:56:16 PM >

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 6:59:44 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Ooh, suspension envy, never did it in silks!

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 7:13:47 PM

PeonForHer

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FR

Ears. Licking ears. It makes it feel somewhat like you could be being eaten.

That's one thing that I've done. Tomorrow, I may or may not remember the other.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 7:14:07 PM

Delilya

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My have done list is rapidly increasing and I hope to keep adding to it. So many thoughts.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 7:19:21 PM

hausboy

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hi LadyPact

I guess for me...it's not so much what I've done vs haven't done... (and yes, like you, the haven't done list is probably the shorter one..) but for me it's "what I'm into now" that's the short list. I've done plenty of things that I decided I didn't want to do twice. Don't know if it's old age or what, but I feel like my BDSM tastes have gotten quite "garden variety" compared to some of the things I used to do.

I was at a play party two nights ago...and there was a particularly loud-mouth sub who was telling a new boy all about all the things he's done...made me chuckle...just confirmed my own biases that usually the loudest person in the room who says the most.....knows the least.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 8:27:58 PM

littlewonder

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I wouldn't even know how to answer the "haven't done". I mean, what do you say? I haven't I haven't broken every single bone in her body yet and let's see..oh yeah, I never made her get arrested for prostitution. LOL. I mean, the list can go on and on from the known fetishes and kinks to ones no one has even heard of or maybe one person on the entire planet has done lol.

Yeah, I've done a lot in my life...bdsm and otherwise, but when I see the posts asking if I have, most of the time I can't be bothered to answer. If I do decide to answer I tend not to go into detail. I will usually answer "yes" or "no" and that's it, nothing else lol. It's just not worth my time to respond any further.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 9:29:33 PM

RaspberryLemon

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My "have done" list is definitely much shorter. We don't really do much "kink," and the stuff that we do engage in, I'd say is considered by pretty much anyone to be "mild."

Although...

quote:

ORIGINAL: sheisreeds
The there's tying my fore arms and upper arms together and I have to act like a T Rex, or me just acting like a T Rex. Sometimes T Rexs attack turtles.

That's hilarious. I wouldn't mind playing dinosaurs. :)

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 10:12:50 PM

LadyPact

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I see we still have to get Kana into the "signing her off of the computer first" kink.

I had to go for it, Dude. Bahahaha!

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/23/2012 10:19:08 PM

littlewonder

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hahaha...hey he did it for a little while today by taking me to a movie lol. Now if he can just get me to sleep then I can cross TWO off my list.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 12:57:23 AM

Kana

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I would hesitate to make a list of what I have done because I think it would freak some folks the fuck out.
That said, the list of what I haven't done, haven't even considered doing (Tyrannosaur tying, for instance) is infinite.
Happily, I'm an imaginative dude, and still get inspired when I see things like cheesegraters at the supermarket

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 2:18:23 AM

LillyoftheVally

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The haven't done list would be harder for me to write because of the imagination it would take, as you say LP if it can be thought up someone, somewhere has done it. I have never sat down to do a list, mentally crossing things off makes me think how lucky I have been with the depth and bredth of experience that I have had.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 2:55:04 AM

crazyml

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

I would hesitate to make a list of what I have done because I think it would freak some folks the fuck out.

Ah yes. This touches on the challenge I have when listing the things I've done.

While I am certain that Kana's list would offer somewhat more freak-the-fuck-outery than mine, I hesistate to list all of the things I've done because it's so dependent on the relationship.

In part it's because, while on one hand, I've done them, so why not list them, on the other it would be wrong for someone to presume that I'd enjoy doing those things with them.

I've had relationships where I would dream of making a playmate wear unmatched underwear, and others where pissing all over her was almost de rigeur.

I could have as much fun with a gal who thought that being fucked doggystyle was the ultimate humiliation as with a girl who needed to be turned into a piss covered slut before she'd so much as blush.

So for me, the "list" of things I'd enjoy is very dependent on the person I'm planning to do them with.

I think that's because my "kink" is about control, rather than specific things.

That isn't to say that people who have specific "thangs they like" are any less "BDSM", it's just my POV.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 2:58:08 AM

DaddySatyr

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Doesn't anyone enjoy a nice "high tea" anymore?

Peace and comfort,

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 4:35:29 AM

everhope

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i really dislike having to discuss what i have and what i haven't done in list form. BDSM is 99% mental for me, so lists have no purpose in my life..
if asked by another, i will gladly share yes or no answers, but i can pretty much rule them out as a play partner or LTR partner. my whole thing is depth and connection even if is only the Dominant/sadist and the submissive/masochist doing a brief dance at a play party.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 4:49:48 AM

MalcolmNathaniel

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LP, have you never heard of Rule 34?

http://www.xkcd.com/305/

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 5:00:44 AM

ChatteParfaitt

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quote:

ORIGINAL: everhope

i really dislike having to discuss what i have and what i haven't done in list form. BDSM is 99% mental for me, so lists have no purpose in my life..
if asked by another, i will gladly share yes or no answers, but i can pretty much rule them out as a play partner or LTR partner. my whole thing is depth and connection even if is only the Dominant/sadist and the submissive/masochist doing a brief dance at a play party.

I like this statement, as it coincides with my own thinking.

I have a date scheduled with a male sub who has a major fetish that I have never dealt with. Does that mean he and I aren't compatible? I don't think so. For me it's not about the particular act, it's about the people doing it and how they react to one another. Can we get to that zing so there's a nice hefty power exchange? Then I'm in.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 5:54:54 AM

everhope

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that is funny and so true.

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 8:36:21 AM

Kana

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MalcolmNathaniel

LP, have you never heard of Rule 34?

http://www.xkcd.com/305/

quote:

LP, have you never heard of Rule 34?

I personally prefer Option J

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Option%20J

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RE: Which is easier? - 7/24/2012 8:36:28 AM

LadyHibiscus

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It's a world of stuff, and as our Crazy says, some of it really IS defined by the relationship. What I do with one of my current playmates... well, I am just amazed that he shares the fetish with so many people, and that more of them aren't dead. I am going to explore new territory with another, stuff that I just never thought about, and am only interested because HE is interested in doing it.

All this fun, and NO SEX AT ALL!!! Wheeeee!

( I LOVE SAYING THAT TO MESS WITH Y'ALL!! My list of stuff I've done would be invisible if I waited to do stuff ONLY with people I am involved with!! It does help that watching other people orgasm is a big thing for me...