quote:

ORIGINAL: mcbride

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

The men here have taught the women that replying with "No thank you" will lead to:

1) Emails demanding an explaination

2) Emails calling us wannabes, fakes and not real submissives.

3) Emails saying we're fat, ugly, old and any other insult they can find to hurl at us.

I'm also going to add, that if you've ignored what that profile says...no one owes you a "no thank you" because you're so arrogant that you think you're the exception to what ever that person has requested.

So, if you have issues with our manners, you can thank your fellow "Dominants" for behaving like asses.

Yup. Agreed, there are people who do those things. Which shows there are goofballs on both sides of the equation, but I see no reason to let either kind off the hook for bad behavior. If some schmuck says things like that in an email, yes, all bets are off, but that's not what we're talking about, assuming Alpha Red is a reasonable guy sending reasonable emails, and there's nothing here to suggest that he ignored things in the profiles like that, one one would have to acknowledge that his complaint is as valid as yours...wouldn't one?

I don't think "the men here have taught the women that replying with 'No thank you' will lead to" trouble. I think some men have, and some women who might act as if it's simply "the men here" are equally culpable.

Oh, and "fellow dominants"? Not here. Hell, I don't even watch wrestling. :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Here's the thing: Sending an email to a stranger is like being a solicitor knocking on my door. Just because you've knocked, doesn't mean I'm obligated to answer.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mcbride

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Here's the thing: Sending an email to a stranger is like being a solicitor knocking on my door. Just because you've knocked, doesn't mean I'm obligated to answer.

Absolutely true, you have no legal obligation. And if the solicitor is a jerk, hey, have at it. If you come to a social site like this one, though, and post a profile, and someone sends a couple of respectful paragraphs, mmmmaybe the tiniest acknowledgment, even if it's "no thanks", starts to seem like a touch of humanity, no?

quote:

ORIGINAL: mcbride
mmmmaybe the tiniest acknowledgment, even if it's "no thanks", starts to seem like a touch of humanity, no?

quote:

ORIGINAL: mcbride

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Here's the thing: Sending an email to a stranger is like being a solicitor knocking on my door. Just because you've knocked, doesn't mean I'm obligated to answer.

Absolutely true, you have no legal obligation. And if the solicitor is a jerk, hey, have at it. If you come to a social site like this one, though, and post a profile, and someone sends a couple of respectful paragraphs, mmmmaybe the tiniest acknowledgment, even if it's "no thanks", starts to seem like a touch of humanity, no?

quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir

That depends....did you actually read her profile. I haven't read OG's profile lately, but mine clearly states that I've found someone and am no longer searching. That doesn't stop the emails (though it has slowed them down).

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

mcbride, I don't see anything in what Oside posted that says ANYTHING about "legal obligation".

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

If they've emailed me, then they have ignored what my profile says and the emails were unsolicited. So, no, they don't deserve my acknowledgement.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mcbride

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Here's the thing: Sending an email to a stranger is like being a solicitor knocking on my door. Just because you've knocked, doesn't mean I'm obligated to answer.

Absolutely true, you have no legal obligation. And if the solicitor is a jerk, hey, have at it. If you come to a social site like this one, though, and post a profile, and someone sends a couple of respectful paragraphs, mmmmaybe the tiniest acknowledgment, even if it's "no thanks", starts to seem like a touch of humanity, no?

quote:

ORIGINAL: mcbride

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

mcbride, I don't see anything in what Oside posted that says ANYTHING about "legal obligation".

Ah, so you understand my post. :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

mcbride, I don't see anything in what Oside posted that says ANYTHING about "legal obligation".

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

McBride, this is an unwinnable argument. A few of them men faked some profiles in a little experiment to see just what happens from the female side of the mailbox, and it wasn't pretty.

Come up to me in the pub and offer me a shandy, and I will be gracious, and hopefully you won't come back with 'well you're a fat cunt anyway' if I give the wrong response. Odds are good that if I turn down your email, the response will not be good. Why should I open myself up to that? Even responding to an innocuous email can lead to a nasty result, I assure you. I'm always relieved when I respond to a comment on one of my pictures and the objective really IS. A convo about parrots or horticulture!

I am not shy about initiating contact with people that interest me. Do you think I hear back from everyone I write to? (Or wrote, rather)? Of course not. And if they don't write back, they don't. It's okay. The social contract of the internet is not the social contract of face to face interaction.

Do I respond to every compliment with a thank you? Yes, I do. Do I respond to every 'hi' or 'do you do this to your slaves?'. No. I just delete. I think of it as time management. I acknowledge that there is another human on the other end of that email, no one is just 'pixels on a screen' to me, except that I do not grant them the ability to make me feel badly. I had a long run as Helpful Hib, trying to explain what is NOT acceptable as an approach. I am done with that. I leave the teaching of social skills to the more patient and tolerant among you.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mcbride


Actually, I don't even see a point of disagreement. I'm in perfect agreement with all of the above, and I have no doubt that that you and others gets tons of perfectly horrifying mail, so I'm a little exasperated that folks keep telling me that they don't reply to jerks, which is (a) fine with me, and (b) not what the OP was talking about.

Can anyone spend a moment, just a moment, on replying to a reasonable email? I was a little surprised by the initial reaction to the OP, who has, perhaps, fled the thread. Is there the slightest chance that his emails were as described?