How do I get spotted by a Dom?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

How do I get spotted by a Dom?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> How do I get spotted by a Dom?

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 1:24:46 PM

SubStudentRich

Posts: 1
Joined: 8/1/2012
Status: offline

Hello everyone

I am new to the site, but have since I discovered it made the observation that most people that live in this lifestyle seems fairly normal. I have always had this desire to serve, but I was never able to spot a Dom. So if anyone could give me any tips or hints on how to spot Doms and approach them in real life, that would be most appreciated. I guess it is not as important as we now have this site, but it remains a curiosity of mine.

Thank you.

Post #: 1

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 1:30:43 PM

Wantstocontrolu

Posts: 127
Joined: 4/11/2008
Status: offline

Asking that question here works.
Looking at profiles and replying works.
Walking around with a steel collar and a sign? Might not work

_____________________________

wantstocontrolu

(in reply to SubStudentRich)

Post #: 2

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 1:41:46 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

You cannot just "spot" a Dom, unless you are at a club that caters to BDSM and someone is walking around dressed like one. And even then you might be wrong.

All you can do is target a Dom, by participating on the forums, looking at ads from Doms and having your own clearly defined profile that might attract a Dom of your choosing.

And attend events where you live; just being passive and hoping to spot someone is not going to work.

(in reply to Wantstocontrolu)

Post #: 3

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 1:52:01 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

If by "serve" you mean "they do fun sexy things to you" and if by "dom" you mean "someone who does fun sexy things to you", then I doubt you can spot that out in the world. Most of us don't advertise our sexuality walking down main street. I'd recommend going to a munch which is, by design, the standard gateway into the BDSM lifestyle groups in the real world. There it'll be easier.

If you just want a dominant relationship partner, then you find them "out in the world" where everyone else is. You "spot" them by looking for people who are calmly assertive just kind of as a default. Carol said of me when she met me, "She likes her men a little bit arrogant".

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to SubStudentRich)

Post #: 4

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 1:55:53 PM

angelikaJ

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

Go and find a local TNG munch.

Don't rush.

How does anyone get to know anyone?

It takes time.

There is no such thing as an instant D/s dynamic, although there are things that mimic it pretty well.
In the end, they fall very flat.

An authentic relationship that is between an authentic you and an authentic dominant partner is the best.
Don't settle for less, if you want more.

_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to SubStudentRich)

Post #: 5

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 2:37:04 PM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubStudentRich
So if anyone could give me any tips or hints on how to spot Doms and approach them in real life,
that would be most appreciated.

Up until 1953, every single Dom looked and acted alike. I swear you could spot them a mile away,
even if you were blindfolded. Nowadays, they are everywhere, and come in such variety that it's
almost impossible to choose which one looks/acts/smells/talks/carries themselves in a manner we
find dominant enough.

Surely, your desire to serve is not without substance, meaning you don't want to serve simply any
woman just because they label themselves as Dominant, right? I'd skip all that Me Dom, you submissive
stuff and instead work on spotting someone that you can enjoy getting to
know in a vanilla sense first, and who can inspire your submission. Best of luck!

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to SubStudentRich)

Post #: 6

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 2:42:18 PM

CRYPTICLXVI

Posts: 3907
Status: offline

With a sharpie, over and over again.
Really, spot a dom?
They don't come labeled, find who you are, what you seek and look for someone who compliments you.
It's like any other relationship... you work on yourself and the other responds.

(in reply to poise)

Post #: 7

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 2:44:57 PM

DaddySatyr

Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CRYPTICLXVI
With a sharpie, over and over again.

I was going to suggest edible body paint but, you beat me to it. Damn it!

Peace and comfort,

Michael

_____________________________

A Stone in My Shoe

Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to CRYPTICLXVI)

Post #: 8

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 2:54:48 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

We Doms are better looking and more intelligent than the population at large. More modest, too.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to DaddySatyr)

Post #: 9

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 3:10:27 PM

chemeli

Posts: 335
Joined: 7/30/2012
Status: offline

*They don't come labeled, find who you are, what you seek and look for someone who compliments you.
It's like any other relationship... you work on yourself and the other responds.*

This.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 10

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 3:19:54 PM

ARIES83

Posts: 3648
Status: offline

You wont be able to tell I don't think...
especially if it was me, I think i'm just a
regular guy. If you saw me with a girl you
probably wouldn't be able to pick it either.

I'm all about being average when out in
public.

Although around these parts, blending in
means wearing Ripcurl boardshorts until
your 40 even though in my opinion they
are more for kids... Sigh

-ARIES

*as for the title, if you want a dom to spot
you, as someone interested in bdsm...
I duno, best of luck*

< Message edited by ARIES83 -- 8/2/2012 3:26:37 PM >

_____________________________

530 DAYS

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 11

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 4:48:11 PM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CRYPTICLXVI

With a sharpie, over and over again.

Connecting the dots can be wicked fun!

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to CRYPTICLXVI)

Post #: 12

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 4:49:42 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubStudentRich

Hello everyone

I am new to the site, but have since I discovered it made the observation that most people that live in this lifestyle seems fairly normal. I have always had this desire to serve, but I was never able to spot a Dom. So if anyone could give me any tips or hints on how to spot Doms and approach them in real life, that would be most appreciated. I guess it is not as important as we now have this site, but it remains a curiosity of mine.

Thank you.

Go to Walmart and look for the couple where she is wearing a steel collar. Then follow him around the store. He'll appreciate your stalk....eerrmm...motivation.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to SubStudentRich)

Post #: 13

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 5:25:11 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
Go to Walmart and look for the couple where she is wearing a steel collar. Then follow him around the store. He'll appreciate your stalk....eerrmm...motivation.

LOLOL... priceless

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 14

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 5:33:07 PM

CRYPTICLXVI

Posts: 3907
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Go to Walmart ...

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 15

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/2/2012 9:44:22 PM

RemoteUser

Posts: 2854
Joined: 5/10/2011
Status: offline

Since the obvious points have already been covered all I would add is, how do you project yourself?

Think of that as you try to "Discern the Dom".

_____________________________

There is nothing worse than being right. Instead of being right, then, try to be open. It is more difficult, and more rewarding.

(in reply to SubStudentRich)

Post #: 16

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/3/2012 7:52:06 PM

GotSteel

Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
You cannot just "spot" a Dom, unless you are at a club that caters to BDSM and someone is walking around dressed like one.

I've always wondered, how does one dress like a dom?

(in reply to sexyred1)

Post #: 17

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/3/2012 8:30:52 PM

Endivius

Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GotSteel

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
You cannot just "spot" a Dom, unless you are at a club that caters to BDSM and someone is walking around dressed like one.

I've always wondered, how does one dress like a dom?

Dress in all black. Wear a tie. Black sunglasses, even at night. Make sure you have a cheap cigar in one hand and a walking cane in the other.

You're welcome.

_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to GotSteel)

Post #: 18

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/3/2012 9:13:25 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

I thought it was leather ass chaps and with floggers attached on clips.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Endivius)

Post #: 19

RE: How do I get spotted by a Dom? - 8/3/2012 9:17:52 PM

Hillwilliam

Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubStudentRich

Hello everyone

I am new to the site, but have since I discovered it made the observation that most people that live in this lifestyle seems fairly normal.
Thank you.

We ARE normal. It's all those nilla fuckers that are twisted.

< Message edited by Hillwilliam -- 8/3/2012 9:21:11 PM >

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to SubStudentRich)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> How do I get spotted by a Dom?

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.094