RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit.

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit.

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit.

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 3:53:45 AM

ChatteParfaitt

Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JhonP

I am very interested in the many crossroads the unfolding of this thread will produce. However based on the regular posters past performance I suspect nothing of a rational or logical nature will will become its part.

And where's your perfectly rational and logical offering to the thread?

It's easy to criticize, much harder to actually DO.

My relationship with himself is based in mutual trust and respect. We also love each other and would be close friends even if we didn't have a sexual relationship.

The sexual relationship is what fuels the D/s. It's a combination of pleasure, transparency, and service. He has power over me and exerts control. However, I don't see us as being unequal in the relationship, just different.

It's not about one being better or more able or stronger than the other, it's more a celebration of our differences, and how we can use those differences to create a stronger more able whole.

_____________________________

(in reply to JhonP)

Post #: 21

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 4:13:13 AM

ClassAct2006

Posts: 318
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

When I am in a D/s relationship it's about control (except in areas not ceded or rather, cede back to me - such as work, children, money).

The stages are choose someone who has a sufficiently similar world view as if you're too different and cede power to that different person it can be disastrous.
Then obey.
Lots of talking, lots of communication.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)

Post #: 22

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 6:15:39 AM

Karnikula

Posts: 55
Joined: 7/21/2012
Status: offline

So, which of all the attributes, motivations, forces and feelings you have listed are direct result or strictly limited to D/s relationships ?

example: (and probably one of the answers) His control over me, due to his dominant and my submissive nature, results in a deep sense of fulfillment (happiness) that I would otherwise not be able to achieve.
or: A constant sexual undertone in all my actions at all times in life due to my absolute surrender to his will.

_____________________________

People are like puzzle pieces that are puzzles.

(in reply to RaspberryLemon)

Post #: 23

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 6:18:57 AM

JhonP

Posts: 83
Joined: 7/5/2012
Status: offline

quote:

And where's your perfectly rational and logical offering to the thread?

It's easy to criticize, much harder to actually DO.

Hush woman, be ashamed, be very ashamed your arrogance and at other’s throat manner reflects badly on your doms ability to impose even a resemblance of social grace.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)

Post #: 24

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 6:35:16 AM

Karnikula

Posts: 55
Joined: 7/21/2012
Status: offline

I think everyone will agree that Drama isn't something to be chased after, but rather avoided and squelched.

I know it's the internet and all such but myself and hopefully others too are actually looking for meaningful exchange here.

_____________________________

People are like puzzle pieces that are puzzles.

(in reply to JhonP)

Post #: 25

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 6:39:21 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JhonP

quote:

And where's your perfectly rational and logical offering to the thread?

It's easy to criticize, much harder to actually DO.

Hush woman, be ashamed, be very ashamed your arrogance and at other’s throat manner reflects badly on your doms ability to impose even a resemblance of social grace.

You mean you're really going to try to pull this card because she's a switch? Maybe you're just not used to females who do a better job of the task at hand than you did. For the record, she's absolutely right.

Maybe you could have your sub come to the boards to show others how to kiss the ass of every cyber twatwaffle who slaps the title Dom on his profile. Don't expect the people collared to others to do so.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to JhonP)

Post #: 26

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 9:35:57 AM

searching4mysir

Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JhonP

quote:

And where's your perfectly rational and logical offering to the thread?

It's easy to criticize, much harder to actually DO.

Hush woman, be ashamed, be very ashamed your arrogance and at other’s throat manner reflects badly on your doms ability to impose even a resemblance of social grace.

Oh please

She doesn't owe any stranger on the internet "social grace". What she exhibited was only "arrogance" to someone with a small mind.

_____________________________

No longer searching -- found my one and only right here on CM

(in reply to JhonP)

Post #: 27

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 9:52:15 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

example: (and probably one of the answers) His control over me, due to his dominant and my submissive nature, results in a deep sense of fulfillment (happiness) that I would otherwise not be able to achieve.

This except I can achieve this with any relationship whether "vanilla" or "M/s". I have always been in traditional relationships with men who are a dominant personality and the head of the house. It just so happens that I like Master for all the same reasons I would like any man who meets my compatibility...honesty, integrity, spirituality, physical and mental attraction, similar likes, dislikes, etc....

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Karnikula)

Post #: 28

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 9:56:16 AM

Karnikula

Posts: 55
Joined: 7/21/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

This except I can achieve this with any relationship whether "vanilla" or "M/s". I have always been in traditional relationships with men who are a dominant personality and the head of the house.

Well that's still a D/s relationship isn't it? Vanilla / Kinky is about sexual dominance and submission, not social.
But I'm defenitely also wondering about sexual D/s.

So in that light, is your D/s also sexualised ?

_____________________________

People are like puzzle pieces that are puzzles.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 29

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 9:58:01 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

Of course it is. We're in a long term committed relationship. So yeah, sex is a part of any normal, healthy relationship.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Karnikula)

Post #: 30

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:01:45 AM

Karnikula

Posts: 55
Joined: 7/21/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Of course it is. We're in a long term committed relationship. So yeah, sex is a part of any normal, healthy relationship.

If I may repeat myself, is your D/s sexualised?

_____________________________

People are like puzzle pieces that are puzzles.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 31

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:04:44 AM

crazyml

Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline

I'm not sure that D/s has to be a distinct and separate part of a relationship and therefore not sure that it needs to be sexualised or not.

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to Karnikula)

Post #: 32

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:04:48 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

well being that our entire life is d/s then yes, of course. <scratches head>

It's not like we go and say "ok we're only d/s when I tell you what to buy at the grocery store" lol. He is the dominant personality so it is this way throughout everything.

< Message edited by littlewonder -- 8/4/2012 10:05:51 AM >

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Karnikula)

Post #: 33

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:06:21 AM

Karnikula

Posts: 55
Joined: 7/21/2012
Status: offline

Now then, do you feel sexually aroused when told to kneel before handing over the wine glass you were just sent to fetch ?

Edit: Yes but there's a difference between getting off on submission and just plainly being involved with a dominant partner as submissive in the whole picture, while going grocery shopping.

If he gave you a detailed list on how to shop for what you are to shop, would you get off on that control? would you get off on your obedience doing it? would you get off on pleasing him in that manner?

< Message edited by Karnikula -- 8/4/2012 10:08:26 AM >

_____________________________

People are like puzzle pieces that are puzzles.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 34

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:08:48 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

lol..being he doesn't drink, it's usually a cup of tea. I automatically start a cup of tea when he walks through the door and I kneel at his feet because again, it's just automatic. It doesn't make me wet. It's just another part of our relationship just like me washing clothes, doing dishes, running errands, taking care of his stuff that needs to be done, etc...

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Karnikula)

Post #: 35

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:12:38 AM

Karnikula

Posts: 55
Joined: 7/21/2012
Status: offline

So when he issues a non-routine order to you (or makes a request or introduces a new rule, protocol / whatever), that still does not involve any sex acts or imply any - you'd never be aroused by this?

_____________________________

People are like puzzle pieces that are puzzles.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 36

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:17:03 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

No, not really unless it's something like some kind of sexual act or something. Otherwise if he enacts a rule such as "make sure to pick up my dry cleaning every Friday", it's not gonna make me wet. I just say ok and do it.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Karnikula)

Post #: 37

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:17:38 AM

crazyml

Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline

O/T.

littlewonder - you have cmail.

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 38

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:19:30 AM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

OP, not sure why you are trying to analyze D/s relationships bit by bit.

We are all so different in what we want and need.

How does me telling you that I get off when a Dominant man is able to make me feel like a quivering pile of goo help your own relationship?

(in reply to Karnikula)

Post #: 39

RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit. - 8/4/2012 10:21:42 AM

Karnikula

Posts: 55
Joined: 7/21/2012
Status: offline

Well most people who find BDSM view D/s in a very sexual manner, even if they seek to practise it 24/7 (which is already quite rare). In their eyes, obeying an order should remind them of the authority/control involved and thus be sexually arousing. Even if it's just scrubbing the floor.

I wonder if we can find such a person right here to discuss this with as well ...

_____________________________

People are like puzzle pieces that are puzzles.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 40

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Analyzing D/s relationships bit by bit.

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.094