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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/28/2013 3:06:04 AM   
ChocletDomme


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		This isnt in reply to anyone just My generalized opinion.

Financial Domination is an art. Everyone cannot and should not practice financial domination. As a Domme who is only 1 year into this particular fetish (11 years into the lifestyle otherwise)

I find those who do not understand it seem to be the most spiteful towards it. I dont understand why someone else would be so upset over what makes another adult aroused. Who the fuck are you?? I mean noone is sending you hate mail because you prefer piss instead of milk in your morning cereal. What 2 consenting adults do between themselves is what they choose to do. Findom isnt illegal...males who enjoy being financially dominated and used are just as sound of mind as someone who likes to stretch their rectum out with traffic cones....

Ofcourse Im beating a dead horse here...not looking to offend any animal lovers..everyone is so sensitive about ones ability to extract something of so much value from someone. Financial domination does not require a whip nor bondage. The power is in the words, the mind. Everyone is not cut out for it. Just like everyone cannot yield a whip..that is also an art.

Geez just let it be...I get satisfaction from spoiling family and friends...so why cant a sub or slaves cock get stiff when a strong powerful, dominant Woman demands his hard earned cash or flaunts what his money has paid for in his face or forces him to budget, save etc or simply indulge his hunger for financial ruin.

My personal subs aren't financial slaves but they do get deep satisfaction from spoiling Me with cash, jewelry, shoes, leather..things I love. Every sub doesnt have to be financially managed in order to serve financially.


Every tribute and or gift a sub gives the Domme isnt financial domination either....it could be simply saying "I adore and worship you" whatever the Domme/Dom enjoys or accepts as tribute...isnt always financial

Group Hug :-D

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/28/2013 3:08:41 AM   
ChocletDomme


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		Again this isnt in reply to anyone in particular, I see it says that on the bottom of My post. I dont post much in forums, so do bare with Me hehehe :D

I just want to add, because Im chatty at the moment lol the danger of this fetish comes when a sub starts submitting to someone who has 0 knowledge of bdsm. Then there comes the nonconsensual misuse of personal information and photos, scams, etc.

If you are sending cash and gifts to a photo of tits then I feel it is your fault for letting your tiny cock lead you into being scammed. Nowadays most Dommes who practice findom have websites, youtube channels, cam verifications on reputable sites, clipstores and some sort of online standing. A twitter account and an amazon wishlist is not enough in My opinion. There will also be no promises of giving you something in exchange for a tribute or gift. Im a lover of nudity and body parts but a Domme spreading her vagina or asshole and saying "give me your money piggy" is NOT financial domination. The term rinsing has also snaked its way into association with financial domination. It is NOT. However it is another way for you to possibility feel cheated or scammed and left high and dry.

I could go on and on but it helps to research these things before leaping in wallet out and dick hard. Dont end up 'Catfished ' Check to see that a Domme has a steady online presence..also asking a Domme to cam verify with you is insulting. Ive gotten scammed by subs before by Indulging this request.

We all learn from these mistakes and move on

< Message edited by ChocletDomme -- 8/28/2013 3:31:56 AM >

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/28/2013 6:21:34 AM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline 		A gift to a Domme isn't financial, if its given without ever being expected.

I was once given a four bedroom house in the middle of the city. The submissive male who gave it to me just wanted to be my favourite. Before accepting such a big deal, I spoke to other Dommes and each one gave me the same advice, 'if you don't take it he will gift it to someone else' and so I did, take it that is and what a headache that turned out to be . The thing is, I never asked for gifts but gifts were very forthcoming. I wonder though, would I of been offered large gifts if I had demanded them? Somehow I don't think so. Most of my regulars came to me because I was absolutely clear about what they were getting for their money. New clients who had done the rounds were often suspicious of hidden extras.

Funny thing is, I have never heard a pro Domme claim she does it because it turns her on, not within her inner circles anyway! Its business and like all business it has to make profits to be successful. She may well get clients she fancies and has a great time with. She may even end up with a client as a full time slave... it happens but normally her personal kinky life is far removed from the paying clients she sees in her chambers.

A Financial Domme more often than not, doesn't interact with the sub on a physical level. Its online, camera, phone, youtube and websites mainly. I think a fem Domme would have to work a 50 hour week to earn what a pro Domme earns in an hour and therefore I have to question it as business.

When you are a pro Domme you are interchangeable. You may have an adult school boy at 2pm and someone who wants to woman worship at 4pm. I don't see this with financial Dommes unless they have half a dozen different profiles. The fin Domme who talks down to men and insults their small cocks is going out to a much smaller audience than a pro Domme. If she only has one persona then that's all she's offering. If thats all she is offering then she's not going to make much money because she's ten a penny and she's got untold competition all around her but and its a big BUT, perhaps she continues regardless because this really is her kink.

I may to do a little experiment and set myself up as a financial online Domme (I have the time at the moment :) I know I'm good at verbal domination, I used to do phone lines. I just want to see how lucrative or not this really is.

< Message edited by MariaB -- 8/28/2013 6:24:01 AM >

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/28/2013 7:06:32 AM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
Status: offline 		ChocletDomme,
Good input. Thanks for sharing.

You obviously don't post often, but that was quality input. Please stop by more often. The forum would benefit from more posts like yours.
-Roch

< Message edited by Rochsub2009 -- 8/28/2013 7:07:58 AM >

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/28/2013 11:16:18 AM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
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Status: offline 		Agreed.

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/28/2013 7:47:53 PM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChocletDomme
I find those who do not understand it seem to be the most spiteful towards it.

Yeah well... I don't understand "it" either because there appears to be two very different "its" in play when we talk about findommes.

You got the K crowd (well, not a crowd, more like one or two) that say things that sound sort of rational.
You got the duck lips pay-piggy crowd that looks a lot like prostitution.

The VAST majority of what we see here is not like K. And it's not like I have anything against prostitution I just have a hard time adding that word and the concept of "dominant" together in any meaningful way.

Overall, my opinion matches yours though. I honestly don't want to get into being the kink police so I got no interest in what is and is not legitimate human sexuality. I'm content to leave that to the religious right.

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/28/2013 10:36:23 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		K crowd....I like it! :)

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 4:12:27 AM   
ChocletDomme


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		Im not sure where prostitution comes into play. I thought prostitutes have to be physically sexually intimate with their client..and again..the term is thrown around loosely. In regards to duck lips...I dont think it defines anyones character or ability....anymore than someone doing ducklips for a joke. I have no problem with prostitution, stripping or escorting. Again there are always those rotten apples ruining it and cheapening it for everybody :-0 (stripping isnt what it used to be)

However there are Pro Dommes who get naked and show tits, pussy and ass yet they arent considered prostitutes, so why should a bikini clad duck lipped young chick be called a prostitute because a man chooses to give her money for simply existing? While it may not be financial domination it isnt prostitution.
I suppose I dont care about what people choose to spend their money on. What I do care about are the misconceptions placed upon a fetish I am involved with..if only to defend Myself. But ofcourse opinions are just like assholes..everybodys got one...including Me. Lol

This is just a reply. How can I post without being in reply to someone?:-/




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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 4:55:49 AM   
metamorfosis


Posts: 1132
Status: offline 		I think the advertising is lame.

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 7:01:31 AM   
Zonie63


Posts: 2826
Joined: 4/25/2011
From: The Old Pueblo
Status: offline 		I always thought that to call it "prostitution" was a red herring anyway, since it clearly does not fall into the legal parameters of how "prostitution" is currently defined. I think some might use it in a more loosely generalized way, as some might say an artist or writer might be "prostituting his talents," which might be akin to "selling out." Someone might argue that politicians are "whores," which wouldn't actually make them prostitutes in the literal sense, but the connotation is generally understood.

I think it's being misapplied here, not just because it skews the meaning of the word and creates misunderstanding, but also because it seems largely irrelevant to the question posed by the OP. To mention "prostitution" brings in a whole load of other issues which might also cloud the discussion and create more confusion than clarity.

Another issue I've noticed in this discussion is the question of the actual money involved. I think that's probably the real underlying issue here, as money brings out the worst in people. One thing that I've discerned in this thread is that people have different perceptions about money and its relationship to concepts of "power."

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 8:24:40 AM   
ChocletDomme


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		Yes fully agreed. I wonder if people would be pissed off if findommes were recieving $5 tributes opposed to $50 , etc. Just an example. However real findommes love the money but also genuinely love the process of weakening their prey, breaking down those defenses and extracting that which makes the world go round (money). Money is essential in this day and age. Mortgage, cars, gas, entertainment, bills, food, etc. To be able to work that out of a sub is a very erotic skill...the process being erotic...the teasing...the denial... until the sub is drymouthed and addicted and paying becomes associated with his/her Dommes pleasure..its a very mentally based domination when done...CORRECTLY lol

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 8:32:55 AM   
ChocletDomme


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		Not saying money wasnt ever essential before lol but thses days you need it for EVERYTHING lol

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 8:54:27 AM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChocletDomme

However there are Pro Dommes who get naked and show tits, pussy and ass yet they arent considered prostitutes, so why should a bikini clad duck lipped young chick be called a prostitute because a man chooses to give her money for simply existing? While it may not be financial domination it isnt prostitution.
I suppose I dont care about what people choose to spend their money on. What I do care about are the misconceptions placed upon a fetish I am involved with..if only to defend Myself. But ofcourse opinions are just like assholes..everybodys got one...including Me. Lol



If you care to read back, which would be hard work at this stage, we have about 50 pages on this very thread regarding prostitution and peoples thoughts on what it is. Its just an argument that went round and round in circles with everyone sticking to their guns and nobody getting anywhere!

Most pro Dommes are called prostitutes by a certain crowd. It doesn't matter if they show their tits or cunt, It doesn't matter if they are covered from neck to ankle in clothes and only touch a client with a gloved hand, they are still prostitutes in some peoples eyes. Personally I accepted that a long time ago. Once you can accept something you can be chilled about it! I said much earlier in this thread, why let it bother you? those who call you a hooker won't be visiting your website or offering you money. They are and should remain an none entity.


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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 9:16:56 AM   
ChocletDomme


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		Thats my question also..why let it bother you? Not you personally MariaB,and I couldnt agree with you more

but just people who create these findom threads. Its all been said before, people just need to enjoy the fetishes that they themselves enjoy. If this were a thread on brown showers I wouldnt bother to stick my nose in it lol because its not a kink of mine therefore I steer clear...but Im not going to bash and shit talk and say it isnt domination. I could go on and on. Lol



< Message edited by ChocletDomme -- 8/29/2013 9:18:15 AM >

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 10:28:33 AM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
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Status: offline 		I would say I guess it bothers me bc people are idiots. Even through 70 something pages of this topic,, we have educated them as to why and how it has nothing to do with prostitution, yet bc their panties are in a bunch, they still swear we're whores.
Which is probably why I can never accept it, bc I'm not going to be labeled as something I'm not.

Like you mentioned. There are bad apples in everything. I'm passionate about standing up for the good apples. :)


To post a reply not to anyone in particular just write "FR" at the top of your message. It means fast reply.

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 11:30:19 AM   
ChocletDomme


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Thank you :D

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 12:37:51 PM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
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From: Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK
I would say I guess it bothers me bc people are idiots. Even through 70 something pages of this topic,, we have educated them as to why and how it has nothing to do with prostitution

I still find that disingenuous... especially coming from you K. I think most get it that "prostitution" like "murder" is a legal definition not an objective reality. So no, this is not prostitution. But an IQ of 40+ ought to yield insight as to why someone would lump it into the same general category. I dislike topics where people seek to be deliberately obtuse and this is one of them.

No, you're not a prostitute. No, I don't want to change the law so that you were a prostitute. If I had my way I'd change the law so there were no prostitutes. But still, the comparison is sort of blindingly obvious and it factors into the discussion of why some folks dislike findomme. To rebut the legal semantics is to miss the point entirely... on purpose.

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I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 1:30:51 PM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline 		Got to agree with Jeff here.

TNDomme I can't help but like you but I'm baffled as to what you are doing here with this thread. Whilst you may of educated people about what your version of a fin Domme is, you haven't educated anyone who believes fin Domme is prostitution. If someone's made up their mind its pointless trying to change it. Its not even about being an idiot. If they were idiots, with the right methods you could educate them. We are talking moral values and to the moralist in question, prostitution doesn't need to consist of sex. For them its about being a sex worker and one could argue that gaining money and requested gifts for turning a man on via the internet (the most common route) is sex work of sorts.

This has become a mission to prove people wrong and its a mission doomed to fail. The thing is, if you know that you are not a prostitute then just rise above what others say. I think it's better to be comfortable in your skin than to be miserable being who you are.


< Message edited by MariaB -- 8/29/2013 1:41:20 PM >

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 1:43:29 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		Ok for instance, one user who sometimes posts named Charles; states that before this thread he really thought fin dommes were prostitutes. After a few of us saying how and what we do in this kink, we have educated him to know the difference.

Maria, I agree that in certain cases this is doomed to fail, but there are a select few who choose to listen and approach this subject open minded.

Jeff, I can see where some people could lump this into the same category bc of a majority of people and how they conduct fin Domme. But not all of us do things by the book.

I guess Im hard headed. Lol either that or a glutton for banging head against wall.

< Message edited by TNDommeK -- 8/29/2013 1:44:24 PM >

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RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? - 8/29/2013 1:47:48 PM   
jola37


Posts: 433
Joined: 7/8/2013
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChocletDomme

Not saying money wasnt ever essential before lol but thses days you need it for EVERYTHING


Sadly very true these days :-/

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Profile   Post #: 1460
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