|
AllisonWilder -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/26/2013 6:00:32 AM)
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: jj292
I've gone back and forth with the whole findomme thing. It's been beaten to death but it's a debate in the lifestyle that will go on and on.
Part of me says that two consenting adults can do what they want with each other. It's really none of my business. But another part of me says that any relationship of any kind that is purely focused on money is bad news. It just usually is. And that kind of thing shouldnt be part of bdsm. I know people make money on BDSM, but the relationship between a dom and a sub should not be a rooted in money.
We can hash out the semantics all day, but a findom relationship can also be rooted in kink (and vanilla) just like any other kinky relationship.. That kink just happens to be money. It sounds similar to rooted in money, but it's really not the same.
quote:
BDSM is about power exchange. That's the core of the lifestyle. A findomme will rush to tell you though that money is power. And that the sub is exchanging power by giving up his money. I'll admit that is true. However, that argument quickly falls apart because the vast majority of findommes will only take on wealthy men. Their websites will come right out and say not to even bother contacting them if you can't support their lavish lifestyle. A wealthy man throwing $1,000 of a very lucrative salary at you because you look pretty is not power exchange.
Well, it's nice to know that I'm in the minority then because I'm not exclusive to wealthy men. To be honest, I prefer men that don't have money coming in so fast they don't know what to do with it because while everyone appreciates money, wealthy men won't feel any power exchange over 20 bucks whereas other men will. Also, some of us don't have websites or lavish lifestyles, that's just stereotyping.
quote:
For most findoms, they are basically sugar babies that don't even have to go out on the date. It is what it is. Now if that findomme is managing or controlling that disposable income of the sub's, then then you have a valid argument. But even in that case 95% of findoms aren't going to give someone the time of day unless they have huge sums of money to give away.
95% of findommes, huh? I'm curious where you get your numbers.
quote:
So money is still the primary motivator.
Just like with any other relationship, vanilla is at the root. Kink is secondary. In this case, kink just happens to be money. It's not as black and white as you're making it out to be.
|
|
|
|
