RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s?

RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (Full Version)

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MariaB -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 7:05:30 AM)
A couple of questions. Would you take on a financial sub that was married or in a relationship and keeping this a secret from his wife/partner? Would you take on anyone you didn't physically or mentally fancy?

AllisonWilder -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 7:23:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB A couple of questions. Would you take on a financial sub that was married or in a relationship and keeping this a secret from his wife/partner? Would you take on anyone you didn't physically or mentally fancy? The only way I take on married subs who are keeping it a secret from their wife is if they can prove that their finances are separate. (I have yet to have someone supply me with adequate proof.) The only way I take on married subs (who say that their wife knows) is if I can meet her as well. (This has also never happened.) I prefer to be attracted to a sub somehow. If I find that I'm not, even after getting to know someone on the inside, I have to decline. I couldn't take on someone that I wasn't mentally compatible with. I would end up feeling frustrated. Sidenote: Thinking back a few years, my answers would have been entirely different. I would have taken on married men and men that I wasn't attracted to in any way.

naughtynick81 -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 1:56:12 PM)
The people who are into this seem only interested in the money rather than BDSM it's self. They use BDSM as a disguise for money.

TNDommeK -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 3:47:57 PM)
I don't have to be attracted to them but a connection is a must. Otherwise, I'd grow bored. Contrary to popular belief, the money isn't the ONLY connection to my subs.

KYsissy -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 3:54:43 PM)
quote]The only way I take on married subs (who say that their wife knows) is if I can meet her as well. (This has also never happened.) [/quote] We are out there.

AllisonWilder -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 4:58:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KYsissy quote: The only way I take on married subs (who say that their wife knows) is if I can meet her as well. (This has also never happened.) We are out there. I definitely believe you that there are some out there, I've just never personally met one that was able to prove that his wife knew.

ResidentSadist -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 5:06:35 PM)
I am waiting for monkeys to fly out of a unicorns ass there is so much wild an unrealistic shit in this thread. It is a scream to read.

TNDommeK -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (9/30/2013 8:34:09 PM)
locks stable doors holding unicorns and sets traps for flying monkeys What maybe wild and unrealistic to some is reality to others.

MariaB -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 2:15:24 AM)
Thanks for your answers. Allison, I believe your aren't a pro Domme as well as a fin Domme so I'm only really asking TNDomme this..... When a client comes to your home or your dungeon for a session and he's already your fin sub, surely that doesn't make you a pro Domme? or do you advertise your sessions openly? If its the second then have they any idea what they are getting for their money or do you do what you want to do regardless? Also does a client i.e. a paying customer also need to prove he's not in a relationship and using financial support to pay for the session? and do you have to connect before you do a session with someone (in the pro Domme context) Some of the things you say make sense, some absolutely baffle me.

MariaB -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 4:41:11 AM)
Actually K I took a proper look at your profile. Your profile has a wish list and when you click on that wish list it takes you straight to a list of things you would like submissive males to buy you. Nobody has to be in contact with you first to buy you a gift. This contradicts what you said on post 1664 'Contrary to popular belief, the money isn't the ONLY connection to my subs.' So what are you saying? That someone who sends you a gift off your wish list, which they find by reading your profile, aren't anything to do with you? or they are something to do with you? Perhaps you should be a bit clearer in your profile because its hugely misleading. If you meant what you said on post 1664 there would be no wish list on your profile, the wish list would come once you connected with them. You also say on your profile that you don't have some bullshit website and you only advertise on here as though that somehow makes you better than those women that do have websites?!?! I find that hugely offensive to every fin Domme and pro Domme that ever took the time to set up a website and why you said that truly has me baffled but never mind! You have kept a very close eye on this thread and you have joined virtually every page in an effort to verify your kink. Its become a mission, not on behalf of fin Dommes but about how genuine you are. You rely on your popularity. You aren't one of these fin Dommes that never writes to forums and so only knows the men/women she speaks to in private. To date you have 5634 posts which makes you a very well known member of this community. It also means people won't say bad shit about you because you're a kind of 'friend'. The more you say, the more you reveal yourself and I think that's the problem here, at least for me believing you that is! At the end of the day a ducks a duck and ducks, as you can see here, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP6bmogGoCg are very clever actresses

cloudboy -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 8:15:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB You have kept a very close eye on this thread and you have joined virtually every page in an effort to verify your kink. Its become a mission, not on behalf of fin Dommes but about how genuine you are. You rely on your popularity. You aren't one of these fin Dommes that never writes to forums and so only knows the men/women she speaks to in private. To date you have 5634 posts which makes you a very well known member of this community. It also means people won't say bad shit about you because you're a kind of 'friend'. The reason this thread has not died is because she is keeping it going. From page 80 to here she's posted 26 times. At one point the moderators were locking other threads and referring posters here. I was told that the answer to my own findom question was here when in fact my own issue was never raised or addressed in this thread. I was also told that "everyone was sick of this topic" which upon looking at the forums at the time -- I agreed was true. It is a worn issue and it will recycle itself regularly. ------- To me the most damning thing about this practice is how you never see the male participants describing their own positive experiences.

MasterCaneman -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 8:41:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cloudboy quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB You have kept a very close eye on this thread and you have joined virtually every page in an effort to verify your kink. Its become a mission, not on behalf of fin Dommes but about how genuine you are. You rely on your popularity. You aren't one of these fin Dommes that never writes to forums and so only knows the men/women she speaks to in private. To date you have 5634 posts which makes you a very well known member of this community. It also means people won't say bad shit about you because you're a kind of 'friend'. The reason this thread has not died is because she is keeping it going. From page 80 to here she's posted 26 times. At one point the moderators were locking other threads and referring posters here. I was told that the answer to my own findom question was here when in fact my own issue was never raised or addressed in this thread. I was also told that "everyone was sick of this topic" which upon looking at the forums at the time -- I agreed was true. It is a worn issue and it will recycle itself regularly. ------- To me the most damning thing about this practice is how you never see the male participants describing their own positive experiences. I agree with this thread going on. It keeps the site less cluttered with whiny threads about fin-doms and serves as a focus for the subject. And I agree with Resident Sadist that some of the replies are a scream to read. To those that do, more power to you. To those that don't, live and let live. What fin-dommes do doesn't bother me in the least, because it doesn't affect me in one way or another.

TNDommeK -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 9:42:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB Thanks for your answers. Allison, I believe your aren't a pro Domme as well as a fin Domme so I'm only really asking TNDomme this..... When a client comes to your home or your dungeon for a session and he's already your fin sub, surely that doesn't make you a pro Domme? or do you advertise your sessions openly? If its the second then have they any idea what they are getting for their money or do you do what you want to do regardless? Also does a client i.e. a paying customer also need to prove he's not in a relationship and using financial support to pay for the session? and do you have to connect before you do a session with someone (in the pro Domme context) Some of the things you say make sense, some absolutely baffle me. Okay let's take one at a time here. When a "client" (I call them subs) come to my dungeon who is a my fin sub...no that is not what makes me a pro Domme. It is when subs who do not belong to me come to have sessions that makes me a pro Domme. Yes I advertise openly. I tell people straight up what I do and what I am. Yes, they have every idea, I'm straight up about that. It says so in my profile that you're attempting to scrutinize. If he is coming in for a session, no he does not need to prove anything. As he is not some one I'm taking on full time. And he is not some one I have invested a relationship with. As far as a connection, yes. A small on. I do like to get to know the person a bit before hand. If you pay attention to things I write and not try to contradict everything, you won't be baffled. It's quite simple really.

TNDommeK -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 9:55:44 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB Actually K I took a proper look at your profile. Your profile has a wish list and when you click on that wish list it takes you straight to a list of things you would like submissive males to buy you. Nobody has to be in contact with you first to buy you a gift. This contradicts what you said on post 1664 'Contrary to popular belief, the money isn't the ONLY connection to my subs.' So what are you saying? That someone who sends you a gift off your wish list, which they find by reading your profile, aren't anything to do with you? or they are something to do with you? Perhaps you should be a bit clearer in your profile because its hugely misleading. If you meant what you said on post 1664 there would be no wish list on your profile, the wish list would come once you connected with them. You also say on your profile that you don't have some bullshit website and you only advertise on here as though that somehow makes you better than those women that do have websites?!?! I find that hugely offensive to every fin Domme and pro Domme that ever took the time to set up a website and why you said that truly has me baffled but never mind! You have kept a very close eye on this thread and you have joined virtually every page in an effort to verify your kink. Its become a mission, not on behalf of fin Dommes but about how genuine you are. You rely on your popularity. You aren't one of these fin Dommes that never writes to forums and so only knows the men/women she speaks to in private. To date you have 5634 posts which makes you a very well known member of this community. It also means people won't say bad shit about you because you're a kind of 'friend'. The more you say, the more you reveal yourself and I think that's the problem here, at least for me believing you that is! At the end of the day a ducks a duck and ducks, as you can see here, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP6bmogGoCg are very clever actresses Ok and now for the next things....wish list. No money is not the ONLY thing. It's an important thing but it's not the only thing. And yes, subs can and have offered things to me with out me knowing who they are. If hey want to have something to do with me, that's on them. If they choose to reveal themselves and say "hey, I bought you this because of this or that" I would talk with them just as soon as they not bought anything. My profile isn't misleading at all, it's very cut and dry. I find only the people who have issues with me find it misleading. Next, the bullshit website. I'm sorry you find it offensive. But I meant every word. As I've often stated I'm not hurting for fin subs. I get plenty here. What I find offensive is when girls lie and manipulate guys to venturing off site and leading them to a pay site just to say hello. If you pay half as much attention to journals as you did my profile you'd see the looooooong list of people who complain about that very thing. Now, I'm not knocking actual sites where guys can get to know the Domme, interact with her, etc. I'm more so talking about the "give me your credit card number for age verification" crap. Next you talk about me defending myself and my popularity. First, I don't speak for others. I've often made that very clear. I have found that Allison and I are similar in certain ways of our fin dommery, so there might be times I reference her. But as far as myself, I can only attest to what I do and have done. There for yes, I do stick up for myself and use myself as a reference quite a bit bc if one person sees that not all of us are alike, it changes some peoples minds about the kink. Take Jeff for example. He will tell you he sees things differently now bc of things I've stated. So...mission accomplished. As far as popularity, it has been my experience to learn here that most of the regular posters have a backbone, so I think they would appreciate you not saying they don't speak up just to appease me. I'm quite sure they have enough balls to say what's on their minds. I don't rely on popularity, I rely on my character and what makes me a cool person. So far I assume ppl like that, otherwise is prolly wouldn't fit in here, I'm sure. I've never seen an instance where it's been hard for this group to be honest about things they didn't like. And this would be a case of me speaking for them. They can correct me if I'm wrong. Of course the more I say, the more I reveal. But I've never had much to hide anyway. And you can call a duck a duck a duck. But sometimes that reveals a lot about you.i didn't bother clicking on your link. But I'm sure you'll have more to add.

TNDommeK -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 9:58:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cloudboy quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB You have kept a very close eye on this thread and you have joined virtually every page in an effort to verify your kink. Its become a mission, not on behalf of fin Dommes but about how genuine you are. You rely on your popularity. You aren't one of these fin Dommes that never writes to forums and so only knows the men/women she speaks to in private. To date you have 5634 posts which makes you a very well known member of this community. It also means people won't say bad shit about you because you're a kind of 'friend'. The reason this thread has not died is because she is keeping it going. From page 80 to here she's posted 26 times. At one point the moderators were locking other threads and referring posters here. I was told that the answer to my own findom question was here when in fact my own issue was never raised or addressed in this thread. I was also told that "everyone was sick of this topic" which upon looking at the forums at the time -- I agreed was true. It is a worn issue and it will recycle itself regularly. ------- To me the most damning thing about this practice is how you never see the male participants describing their own positive experiences. Cloud boy, as MC pointed out, I refresh this topic so other whiney crap can't be posted. I would love to hear your legit question, as I'm sure so would other fin dommes. I'm sure they read this. I'm sure people are sick of this topic, thus the reason this thread was asked to be kept alive. But again, do ask your question. MC, I agree with RS kinda. I just like to tease him with the unicorn statement. Lol but Some of the responses on this thread are weird. But to each his own.

JeffBC -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 1:09:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cloudboy The reason this thread has not died is because she is keeping it going. From page 80 to here she's posted 26 times. Just a little reality check here. When a thread has spun up that was a topic near and dear to my heart I post on it regularly also. Conversely, you'll note that I don't post much or at all on things related to sadism and masochism. That seems sort of natural to me. Also, despite what you may think, I'm interested in keeping this thread going also. Note this post here. It would have been trivially easy to ignore your post but I choose not to. Partly, that's because the whole concept of having an allowable set of kinks just rankles me. Partly, that's because I think folks like K and Allison get tangled up with more opportunistic fin-dommes and I think the distinction is valid. Partly, it's because I think having one consolidated thread is better than 2 dozen threads a week on the topic. quote: At one point the moderators were locking other threads and referring posters here. I was told that the answer to my own findom question was here when in fact my own issue was never raised or addressed in this thread. So then ask it. quote: To me the most damning thing about this practice is how you never see the male participants describing their own positive experiences. Carol doesn't post here. Is there something damning about that I should know? In general it's not hard to see why a fin-sub would choose not to reveal themselves here on CM. Out of curiosity, how many positive testimonials would it take for you to change your mind. As you're pondering that, please bear in mind the number of "crash & burn" M/s relationships vs. the number which succeed and have "positive experiences" to report. Perhaps we should also damn M/s relationships?

MariaB -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 1:26:10 PM)
Actually I think the majority of regulars have stayed well away from this thread, at least once the amount of pages went beyond silly. Please don't misquote my words to make it look like I'm insulting the regulars. That's kind of manipulative don't you think?!? Most of the regulars on here don't want to get involved in a squabble with another regular user for obvious reasons, that doesn't mean they don't have backbones, it just means they like a peaceful life. Just because I'm known for throwing the cat amongst the pigeons, doesn't mean everyone will. Actually the more you say, the more I don't understand. The more you write, the more confused I've become! What was it that made me change my mind from believing you to not believing you? I don't have time to go through your post quoting snippets of it. Ill leave you to it, though I may come back and have a quick browse next month, next year or at some distant point in the future.

TNDommeK -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 2:52:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB Actually I think the majority of regulars have stayed well away from this thread, at least once the amount of pages went beyond silly. Please don't misquote my words to make it look like I'm insulting the regulars. That's kind of manipulative don't you think?!? Most of the regulars on here don't want to get involved in a squabble with another regular user for obvious reasons, that doesn't mean they don't have backbones, it just means they like a peaceful life. Just because I'm known for throwing the cat amongst the pigeons, doesn't mean everyone will. Actually the more you say, the more I don't understand. The more you write, the more confused I've become! What was it that made me change my mind from believing you to not believing you? I don't have time to go through your post quoting snippets of it. Ill leave you to it, though I may come back and have a quick browse next month, next year or at some distant point in the future. Then you aren't reading it correctly. When something has said something that a regular has an opinion of, they respond. As normal people would when interest strikes them. And as I said, it's only silly to people who disagree. Nothing manipulative about it, I twisted nothing. It's there for them to read and draw their own conclusions. Seems to me the only person squabbling about it, is the one who enjoys throwing cats in with pigeons. You are allowed to think what you want or believe what you choose. I simply stated what MY life as far as fin Domme is about. I've never really lost any sleep bc you did or don't believe anything I say. Not ever sure what you mean by what you said...but whatever. Again, if you would actually pay attention to what is written instead of just waiting your turn to disprove everything I say, you might catch on. Do as you like, always a pleasure talking with you. I'm sure this thread will be here then as well.

cloudboy -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 4:42:48 PM)
This is a weak response by you, especially the part about comparing Carole to the lack of male subs who post about this (0). (As in active happy, fulfilling participation.) What would be an apt comparison would be a dearth of femsubs posting about male domination, but that's not the case. Also, people who say that selling services or hiring yourself out - does not equate to kink - are not exactly acting like intolerant assholes. They are making a highly rational, valid point. In my case I give the mods credit, they helped me see the landscape better here and to drop the subject. If I had to guess the answer to my own question it is that men are ashamed that they have to give favors or pay for female attention and the ones drawn to blackmail or monetary exploitation keep quiet about it the same way a heroin addict treads quietly about what he does. I have seen no evidence to the contrary on these fronts. Most of the women who post here about the subject have a promotional agenda. If men are truly interested in something, believe me, women do not have to promote it for them.

TNDommeK -> RE: Is financial domination a legitimate form of D/s? (10/1/2013 4:46:53 PM)
Yet he never asked the question. And not one of my subs is ashamed, that I assure you. I see you had the decency to write "most" women who post here. That I'll agree. Because there are a few of us who do not need the advertisement. But still I'd like to know your question.

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