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RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 1:01:17 PM

WomanlyWiles

Posts: 166
Joined: 3/14/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Winterapple

During the time you were unaquainted with
the lifestyle things changed drastically.
The consensus was reached that only toys
in the vag was the true way to go.
If you want to experience an actual
penis down there you will have to
leave the lifestyle and go vanilla.
That's just how it is.
Also, it really isn't very wise to admit
to the blow job thing. In the years
you since you were acquainted with
the lifestyle blow jobs have become
frowned upon. They're commonly a
hard limit for most Doms. You've found
the rare Dom who accepts them.

Can i be in your gang?

(in reply to Winterapple)

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Post #: 41

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 1:40:12 PM

Lucifyre

Posts: 1067
Joined: 3/27/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Speechless.

Just. speechless.

LaT? May I join you, Hibbie and LadyP on that porch?

HEY dammit! I was there first!
sheesh. Which one of you wants a coffee refill? You know...while I'm up?

good grief.

Lucifyre

_____________________________

"Batteries? OMG, Bitch Please! My Shit plugs in!"
I do this because it fucking feels good.
I like girls who like girls
The thing about standards is: There are SO many to choose from.

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Post #: 42

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 1:46:06 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

The op is 55, which probably means the dude is about that age also. Honey, he's doing you with toys because he has ED. He's ashamed of admitting it, which is why he won't let you ask any personal questions.

Ask him if he can get a scrip for Viagra, or if he's tried and does it work for him. It doesn't always. If not, tell him to get a pump. Yeah he has to go to the bathroom for a couple of minutes to get ready, but so what?

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Post #: 43

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 1:58:13 PM

JanahX

Posts: 3443
Joined: 8/21/2010
Status: offline

This is a put on right? There is no way that you can actually believe what you just wrote. If in case you actually do believe this - then I think you shouldn't be in a relationship - you don't even know how to talk to people.

quote:

ORIGINAL: aleneb

since I am only into him for the past 4 weeks, we only meet 2x wk, daily assignments and communication. I have not been given permission to ask personal physical questions yet - should I ask when I can ask such a personal question and wait for his permission.

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The second rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.

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Post #: 44

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 2:00:14 PM

JstAnotherSub

Posts: 6174
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aleneb

I recently joined a Master to reacquaint me to the lifestyle. He is teaching me slowly. He does offer affection and caresses and slight massages after my punishments. I have my assignments & I have my rewards. But the rewards have not been with him actually in my pussy. He uses his toys (very elaborate toys!) I have given him bj. But he does not physically perform on me except with devices. I have never had a Dom in this manner before, but I am still a beginner returning to the lifestyle so I am grateful that he is patient and trusting. But I am curious I know I can not ask my Master but if other subs could help me figure him out. Anxious to more forward. How long should I give him to find out? I know as a sub I must serve his needs first and be obedient in his training and his desires.

Seriously? You want a bunch of strangers to answer this?

Anything I have to say would get me a gold letter, so I will just say good luck and bless your heart.

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(in reply to aleneb)

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Post #: 45

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 2:01:54 PM

JstAnotherSub

Posts: 6174
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Speechless.

Just. speechless.

LaT? May I join you, Hibbie and LadyP on that porch?

Absofuckinlutely

I wanna come to. When I go to the porch, there is herbs involved. Just sayin...

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Post #: 46

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 2:03:43 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JstAnotherSub

I wanna come to. When I go to the porch, there is herbs involved. Just sayin...

Of course you can come! If we run outta room on da porch.....we can overflow into the orchard! Down onto the patio. Out onto the other porch.....livingroom....kitchen...... We gots da room!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to JstAnotherSub)

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Post #: 47

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 2:08:00 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

The op is 55, which probably means the dude is about that age also. Honey, he's doing you with toys because he has ED. He's ashamed of admitting it, which is why he won't let you ask any personal questions.

Or he's Chatterbox's "Master".

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The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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Post #: 48

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 2:11:50 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

*notices that the OPs nick is a backwards mis-spelling of BANAL*

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CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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Post #: 49

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 2:41:13 PM

VideoAdminGamma

Posts: 2233
Status: offline

Fast reply

Please remain on topic to the OP. It really does save a lot of work and even more posts disappearing :)

Thank you for being a part of CollarMe,
VideoAdminGamma

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Post #: 50

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 2:59:16 PM

kiwisub12

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline

Serious answer - since you are 55, i will make a mad guess and say the dominant in question is older than you. Erectile dysfunction may come into play - and if so, you can have a very happy and fufilling sex life without an erect penis. Five of the best years of my life were in this type of relationship.

and he told me about his penis's issue after about the third time we met.

(in reply to graceadieu)

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Post #: 51

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 4:57:34 PM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aleneb

I recently joined a Master to reacquaint me to the lifestyle. He is teaching me slowly. He does offer affection and caresses and slight massages after my punishments. I have my assignments & I have my rewards. But the rewards have not been with him actually in my pussy. He uses his toys (very elaborate toys!) I have given him bj. But he does not physically perform on me except with devices. I have never had a Dom in this manner before, but I am still a beginner returning to the lifestyle so I am grateful that he is patient and trusting. But I am curious I know I can not ask my Master but if other subs could help me figure him out. Anxious to more forward. How long should I give him to find out? I know as a sub I must serve his needs first and be obedient in his training and his desires.

First of all, you are definitely not taking care of yourself the way you should be. I'm not sure why you think you can't ask your Master things, he's supposed to be there for you. If he's the one telling you that you can't ask him things please cut him loose immediately and walk away, that's ridiculous. You are responsible for yourself and for acting like an adult which is to watch out for your safety and for need fulfillment. You cannot just put all that on someone else and think it'll be done by him doing mind reading, you're supposed to communicate with the guy and let him know what you need.

We're not supposed to fill in for him, he's supposed to do that and he wont' know unless you let him know your questions. What he's doing with you isn't following some arcane BDSM protocol that you're not aware of. Saying you are a beginner and that you've never had someone perform in this manner sounds like you think he's following some road map that you don't know about. He's not. He's probably got ED as was suggested and is trying to cover it up. You're letting him because you're not asking him what's going on. I'm not sure why you're grateful he's patient and trusting, he's probably thanking his lucky stars that you're letting him get away with his false front.

How long should you give him to find out? Not one second longer. Figure out if you want to be with this guy or not. If it were me, I'd probably not stick it out at this phase, I'm not into doing without with someone who is basically a stranger to me. If he were someone I cared for it would be much different, but at this stage if I'd decided to be sexual with him then I'd want penetration. That's just me. HIm not being honest with me from the start would pretty much be the deal breaker.

On another note, sounds like CB's Master for sure or another sock of hers. She probably wants us to think this happens to all sorts of people to make herself look better.

(in reply to aleneb)

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Post #: 52

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 5:34:07 PM

angelikaJ

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

The op is 55, which probably means the dude is about that age also. Honey, he's doing you with toys because he has ED. He's ashamed of admitting it, which is why he won't let you ask any personal questions.

Ask him if he can get a scrip for Viagra, or if he's tried and does it work for him. It doesn't always. If not, tell him to get a pump. Yeah he has to go to the bathroom for a couple of minutes to get ready, but so what?

Or he has a wife and it isn't cheating if he doesn't have intercourse... .

_____________________________

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Post #: 53

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 5:43:27 PM

angelikaJ

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aleneb

I recently joined a Master to reacquaint me to the lifestyle. He is teaching me slowly. He does offer affection and caresses and slight massages after my punishments. I have my assignments & I have my rewards. But the rewards have not been with him actually in my pussy. He uses his toys (very elaborate toys!) I have given him bj. But he does not physically perform on me except with devices. I have never had a Dom in this manner before, but I am still a beginner returning to the lifestyle so I am grateful that he is patient and trusting. But I am curious I know I can not ask my Master but if other subs could help me figure him out. Anxious to more forward. How long should I give him to find out? I know as a sub I must serve his needs first and be obedient in his training and his desires.

You have choices available to you, but the easiest way to make use of them is to decide first, before you get involved what is and is not acceptable to you.

Make a list of both that and what your expectations are and discuss them before you get into your next relationship.

If your lists do not match up and the dominant partner is not open to negotiation, then it is time to say: "I'm sorry but we just aren't compatible.".

You don't have to put up with red flags and unacceptable behaviors.

Lizi is right: you aren't taking very good care of yourself.
You deserve to take excellent care of yourself and to find someone who likewise will take care of you... but you need to take the lead position on that, at least until you have found someone worthy of your trust.

Stop thinking you have to settle.

_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

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Post #: 54

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 7:04:54 PM

culareD

Posts: 762
Joined: 8/16/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I don't know who this one ^^^ is, but I vote to keep!

THIS

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Post #: 55

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 7:07:57 PM

culareD

Posts: 762
Joined: 8/16/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*adores WInterapple*

seconds GT's sentiment!

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Post #: 56

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/11/2012 8:03:36 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

Let me guess....another Shades of Grey?

Dear, he's married.

Wow there's been a lot of 40 and 50 somethings here with the same kinds of problems lately.
How do people get to that age with issues like this?

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Everything has changed

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Post #: 57

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/12/2012 6:57:33 AM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline

Well I'm glad you got current results. Phew!

As for the rest, I guess the way he chooses to reward you is up to him.
Do you still feel like you can't ask your Dude why he doesn't have penis+vagina intercourse with you?
You have to be able to communicate some way and get clarification; otherwise if the relationship ceases to make you happy, you'll have to work with that, and he'll think it's all coming out of the blue.

Talk about stuff.

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"Obey your Master." Metallica

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Post #: 58

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/15/2012 6:47:33 AM

nephandi

Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline

Greetings

Why can you not ask your Master is he mute and and illiterate and unable to sign? Off course you can ask your Master just be respectful. Say Master do you have a moment I would like to talk. An then ask him why he uses toys and not his anatomy, a BDSM relationship needs communications, also why do you think random folks on a forum know why your Master, a man most of us have not ever met, do the things he do in bed, do you think we are all psychic? Ask the man himself.

I wish you well

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Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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(in reply to aleneb)

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Post #: 59

RE: has this ever happened to another sub? - 9/15/2012 7:29:57 AM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

Tiny penis, erectile dysfunction, not sexually attracted to you...
^all the above? None of the above?^

I dunno. I've been out of it so long things MIGHT have changed, but as far as I recall - men sorta liked dipping their doodle and getting it wet.
Blow jobs do that, so he seems about normal to me.

Not allowed to ask personal physical questions? How can you get personal and aquainted without being able to get personally inquisitive?

The more I read these posts, the more I'm happy with my shower massager.

WinD

(in reply to nephandi)

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Post #: 60