Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (Full Version)

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CountDeWinter -> Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 5:45:32 AM)

Hello Everyone,

I am searching for a 24/7 slave for Myself primarily, but also for My female sub.

She is My sub, but is Switch, a side she doesn't get to use on Me, so we sat down and chatted about it, and we decided we would like a 24/7 Slave to join us and make our relationship a poly household.

I have spent a while now chatting to people, in an attempt to find someone to join us, I have spoken to plenty of people who are interested in online only, people who 'say' they are already IN a 24/7 Slavery position, and if I speak to one more person who wants Me to send My life savings to Ghana I will scream!!

It seems odd that there are so many people saying they are already IN these relationships, BUT no-one who is actually looking?

Do 24/7 Slaves exist, or are they a figment of a fetid imagination?

Love to hear your thoughts!



GreedyTop -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 5:47:53 AM)

Yes.



CountDeWinter -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 6:06:07 AM)

Thank you for the deeply insightful feedback! ;-)

Anyone else care to expand on their experiences or advice in looking?



SinFix -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 6:10:29 AM)

What you are looking for is called a unicorn... search that term on the forums for your answers...



AthenaSurrenders -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 6:12:01 AM)

Yes they do exist. But online you're always going to bump into people who are just fantasising, people who are trying to make money etc.

On top of that, this is a really serious relationship you're looking for. There's a million ways in which you might not be compatible with each other, a million reasons why people might decide you're not the one they want as their 24/7 master. ESPECIALLY when they need to be compatible with both of you. That's a complex and difficult dynamic you are looking for there. You both have to like her and she has to like and trust both of you to the point of submitting as a slave 24/7. That's going to be tough to find any day.

Added to that there are lots of couples looking to add a third person, and very few women wanting to join an already established dynamic. The deck is massively stacked against you. Even if you are the cutest, most intelligent, nicest, most financially stable, friendliest, funniest and most generous people looking, you still have to factor in age, distance, chemistry, practicalities and kinks.

Do you go out and meet people at events and munches? Most of the problems will still exist, but at least you will know they are not scammers and they are really interested in the lifestyle. Building up a community reputation will only help your search.



CountDeWinter -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 6:25:44 AM)

Sinfix - Thank you for the terminology, not one I had come across, very useful thank you!!

AthenaSurrenders - "you are the cutest, most intelligent, nicest, most financially stable, friendliest, funniest and most generous people looking" - Have we met?? :-)

Seriously, thank you for the Feedback, much appreciated! No we don't get out to munches, with the various other things we have going on we hadn't really thought about making the time so far!



hellioncheriecpl -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 6:32:06 AM)

It happens when one takes total control - that's how I see it.



DarkSteven -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 7:17:19 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CountDeWinter
so we sat down and chatted about it, and we decided we would like a 24/7 Slave to join us and make our relationship a poly household.



So the two of you made the decision, huh? Don't forget that the unicorn needs to decide as well.

Your profile says "We want a sub/slave". That's it. A sentence of describing you. Nothing about what kind of relationship you envision. Nothing about whether she'll be shopping with you, eating out with you, how she'll related to each of you.

OF COURSE you're not having any luck!



CountDeWinter -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 7:44:58 AM)

....



DarkSteven -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 7:57:36 AM)

No problem. I had misinterpreted your post as saying you wanted to make your search more effective, not that you wanted to rant.



LaTigresse -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 8:00:01 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CountDeWinter
are they a figment of a fetid imagination?



Yes.



AthenaSurrenders -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 8:03:48 AM)

I see what you are saying but DarkSteven's advice is sound. It's not off topic- you're saying 'there doesn't seem to be any 24/7 slaves' and he's saying 'you're not attracting them with that profile'. Your profile is your first impression, and when you have such tough competition it needs to be absolutely top-notch. The women who are looking for this kind of situation have the luxury of picking and choosing. If she looks at a profile and there isn't much info, she's probably not going to get in touch just on the off chance that you might match up.

You don't have to go into intimate detail, but you should give some idea of what you're imagining. One D/s relationship looks so different from another. How about some basics - I take it she will live with you? Will she be expected to do all the housework? Will she be able to keep her job? Do you imagine a romantic triad where everyone loves each other? Or is she going to be mostly a partner of just one of you? Or is she just going to be a live-in maid with kinky benefits? Will you all be traveling together? Going clubbing? Will most weekends be spent camping, or playing board games, or going to dinner parties?

You don't need to fence yourself in, you can definitely put that you are flexible, you don't need to present her with a list of duties on day one. But you do need to give some idea where things are going. Whether you put it in your profile or not, you still have requirements just like her, so the only thing missing them out will do is delay finding out if they match.



SlipSlidingAway -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 8:08:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CountDeWinter

Sinfix - Thank you for the terminology, not one I had come across, very useful thank you!!

AthenaSurrenders - "you are the cutest, most intelligent, nicest, most financially stable, friendliest, funniest and most generous people looking" - Have we met?? :-)

Seriously, thank you for the Feedback, much appreciated! No we don't get out to munches, with the various other things we have going on we hadn't really thought about making the time so far!


Quick question, and not trying to be sarcastic in any way, but if you don't have the time to look for a third with everything going on in your life right now, what makes you think that you have the time to invest in a slave?   It's a relationship mostly like any other.  She's not just going to show up ready to be integrated into your family. 

From what I understand, there are so many people seeking what you are looking for (and so few candidates) that if you don't even have the time to look for a slave, the chances one is going to land in your lap is highly unlikely. After all, there are many other couples out there that do have the time and are seriously out there making an effort.  

After locating a candidate (if you do) you will also need to cultivate and nurture that other relationship.

So, if you want to find a slave you are going to need to make more time and make it more of a priority.





OsideGirl -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 8:11:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders
Your profile is your first impression, and when you have such tough competition it needs to be absolutely top-notch. The women who are looking for this kind of situation have the luxury of picking and choosing. If she looks at a profile and there isn't much info, she's probably not going to get in touch just on the off chance that you might match up.


Men outnumber women in WIITWD at least 10:1.

Now take the number of women and pull out the women who are really bi and are willing to be the third person in an already established relationship. Now from the few remaining women, remove those that aren't running a scam or have ulterior motives. See how small that number can be?

You have a lot of competition for those few women, so if you want to catch their attention, you will need to have your A game going on.


Lastly, unless your primary relationship is rock solid and she feels secure, poly never works. There are a whole subset of people that prey on weak relationships.



CountDeWinter -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 8:42:24 AM)

Hi SlipSlidingAway - No problem, I can see where you are coming from, and as mentioned above, maybe I should have expanded a little more. I have done munches over the years, and maybe it was bacd luck, but I found them very similar to going along to Pagan Moots, too full of a combination of Ego and Politicking, so whenever I think about them there is a bad taste in My mouth, so I just generally think they aren't worth the time.

Don't get Me wrong, I am not knocking anyone else, or anyone's experiences may be different, but I am not that enamoured. Granted, My opinion may be coloured by the fact that I am not really a 'Group' type when it comes to My tastes, for Me it is about emotional connection as much as physical touch, so I prefer My initmacies 'intimate'! :-)

Thanks for thoughts though, much appreciated!!



CountDeWinter -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 8:46:42 AM)

Hi OsideGirl - Yes, thank you for the feedback, I agree completely. I am lucky in that I am confident in the steadiness of My relationship, we discussed this as an area of our relationship that just didn't seem to 'align' shall we say - she was the one who suggested it, I was thinking about it as a concept, but hadn't mentioned it, when she did it was like a piece in a jigsaw clicking.

Again, it is not essential, we are happy as a couple, but we just think the dynamic would work better that way, and it is always useful having a third opinion in discussions over a bottle of wine!! ;-)



OsideGirl -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 9:23:34 AM)

Well, here's the reality: until you have actually done this....you don't know how you're going to react. Little things that you never thought of in a million years will cause an emotional response.

The idea that you're going to just jump into a "24/7 slavery" dynamic with a third is kind of unrealistic. It's like assuming that since you know how to ride a bicycle, you can compete in the X games.

Before making a commitment that you're not sure you can carry off, I would suggest finding a steady "date" to see if it's something that really works for you.



Alecta -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 9:24:56 AM)

There are some good threads in the archives regarding 24/7 slavery in reality and fantasy and various weigh-ins by those who have lived it or are living it. In broad strokes, 24/7 is pretty low key most of the time and largely about rules and protocol and how things are done rather than back to back pornographic play.



myotherself -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 9:50:27 AM)

OP - you're in Sheffield, and it just so happens that Yorkshire has an extremely lively fetish scene. I myself go to a play party in Yorkshire every month, and there are munches all over the place.

I suggest you find your way over to fetlife and do a search for 'Yorkshire' - you'd be surprised how much is going on!

And I took the time to peruse your profile. As others have said, you are in a large crowd of people fighting for the few available 'unicorns'. Your profile needs to be a lot more detailed as to what the slave will get from the relationship if you are to be taken seriously by anyone looking.



LadyPact -> RE: Does 24/7 Slavery ACTUALLY Exist? (10/1/2012 1:20:04 PM)

Does it exist? Absolutely. I'm kind of confused as to why you would think otherwise.

For what it's worth, you are among a vast sea of m/f couples who thought they were going to put up a listing on the internet and 'presto'! It's going to happen. There are thousands and thousands of people just like you who thinks a female willing to join them is just going to fall into their lap.

Now, ask Me how many succeed.




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