ResidentSadist
Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
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/flame on
Common sense shouldn’t be a rare commodity. The SSC flag wavers are annoying little twits that are literally ruining the BDSM community by selling it to tourists under the guise of safety so they can get fresh vanilla kink fuck meat for themselves. They should go hang with the swingers and step away from their fluffy painless socially acceptable floggers and politically correct social postures and leave BDSM for those that actually like the BD & SM parts of it. …I’m actually into bondage, discipline and S&M, so I‘m very biased. I own gear that actually hurts and I like to play with painand use protocol.
I liked the people that were in the lifestyle 20 or 30 years ago when it was a dark, scary and unsafe place that scared tourists away. At least you knew what stereotypes would compose the community back then. I am one of those that thinks "SSC has poisoned the well". That SSC crap is one of the major factors that left the gate open for all the horny housewives that read 50 Shades of Grey. If this was 30 years ago and some Shades of Grey horny housewife hit a BDSM club or event, she would run crying from building in fear and give up BDSM on the spot... thank god, another tourist has left the building. Yes I am lamenting about the good ol' days when BDSM had an edge and you had to earn your chops or work your way into the community.
Hell, even the guy who coined that SSC phrase (David Stein, look it up) went around the country apologizing for it and said he never meant for the community to pick it up as a banner or try and to exclude the edge players with. He feels horrible about every having coined that phrase. It was only meant for a localized group of newcomers in response to behavior by a particular group of predators’ in San Francisco.
In one apology David Stein says:
"The issue of my personal connection with the phrase is trivial compared with the issue of how the phrase has been abused and perverted in the years since it was coined. But i have to share some of the responsibility for that, since it wasn’t until a couple of years ago that i realized what a monster we had created. The only reason i ever tell anyone that i was the author is so i’ll have some authority when i explain what we meant by it back then — and what we didn’t mean by it. Above all, we weren’t trying to establish a fucking credo! The idea that ‘safe sane consensual’ is used to define something like articles of faith s/m newbies are expected to absorb turns my stomach, especially when the people doing the defining are the kind who do s/m at a very tame, low level of intensity and think that’s where the boundaries should be set for everyone.
“The other big problem i have is with those who come at it from the opposite direction and claim that ‘safe sane consensual’ was always merely a PR gimmick, a way to present a friendly face of s/m to the public and the authorities even though we knew better. This is just false historically, and it is as much as accuses those of us who originally promoted the slogan of being liars. On the contrary: We did intend to draw a distinction and to leave some kinds of sadomasochistic behavior on one side of the line as indefensible while maintaining that whatever fell inside the line was defensible ethically and should be defended politically and legally. But what we intended to leave outside the line was things like sadistic serial killers and snuff scenes for money, coercive s/m of all sorts, not the edgier kinds of consensual play — unless there was a question whether consent was even possible, as with the underage or the mentally unbalanced. We never intended to draw the line to leave out heavy s/m, real pain rather than symbolic pain, blood play, knifeplay, humiliation play, 24/7 Master/slave relationships, and so on. But all these things and more have come under the gun in recent years from self-righteous censors and ‘dungeon monitors’ within our community waving the SSC banner!
“In my own case, my hope was that the terms ‘safe, sane, and consensual’ would prove to be the starting point for a continuing community-wide discussion about the elements of an s/m ethics. Instead, what has happened is that the discussion has largely congealed around those three terms themselves, or about the SSC slogan. The only progress we’ve made has been with the term ‘consensual,’ where we have a far deeper and more nuanced understanding today than we had in 1983 — but more of that is owing to the women’s movement and the discourse about domestic abuse than to any discussions specifically within an s/m or D/s context. And too many people have simply tuned out, have stopped thinking or talking about these issues — either because they think ‘the SSC creed’ already answers all the questions, or because they think SSC has poisoned the well and must be rejected altogether before anything new can grow.”
/flame off
One of my my fav T-shirts is from Dungeon Outfitters in Chicago and it says, “Unsafe, Insane and Nonconsensual”.
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