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Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:01:34 PM   
ShadesOfTeal


Posts: 4
Joined: 7/30/2012
Status: offline 		Is there a place, either on these boards or elsewhere, to post negative experiences/warnings to protect other members of the community from phonies/liars/abusers, etc?

< Message edited by ShadesOfTeal -- 10/18/2012 12:54:55 PM >

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"Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away."
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:11:19 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline 		This'll end well.

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Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:11:22 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		No, there isn't a place to blacklist other members. You may feel justified in doing that to someone, but there is only your side of the story and it's not allowed. Btw, your journal entry blacklisting another member of this site is against the TOS that you agreed to when you made a profile here. Here, read this, Why We Don't Allow Blacklists.

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:14:34 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		This site does not condone blacklisting, regardless of whether or not your intentions are good.
Here is a link to part of the guidelines here which may give you an idea as to why this is so.
There are some sites you can find that cater to what you are trying to do. Google might help link you there.

I should also point out that your journal is in violation of the Terms of Service here, and should
be removed lest your membership options change.

Edited to add a ^5 to lizi. Great minds and all that.

< Message edited by poise -- 10/18/2012 12:15:49 PM >

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:27:52 PM   
Oneechan


Posts: 50
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		no stop whining.

(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:28:41 PM   
ksw1958


Posts: 1
Joined: 7/30/2010
Status: offline 		No, it isn't a very nice position to be in. Especially when one has made friends here, and then You get black listed. Get a hundred emails..........telling You You have been black listed. It's daunting to say the least. And yes, there are two sides to the story. It is a free site. IF You don't like what You find, then leave it a lone. It is not for You. It seems like silly high school drama!! From a Grown Man........who claims to have control of His life!!

(in reply to lizi)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:32:58 PM   
Oneechan


Posts: 50
Joined: 8/31/2012
Status: offline 		also wow, i just looked at your journal.

there are seven billion people on this planet, and rising fast. the proportion of those who are likely to read your journal, and the proportion of those who are likely to interact with the person you mention in it, are both astronomically small. the proportion of people who will do BOTH of those things is really really really double astronomically small.

you are pissing into a black hole in the middle of nowhere, for no reason. doing something that will have no effect on anyone, anywhere, ever, and getting pointlessly worked up about it.

some people are dicks. learn to recognise and identify them, to only associate with worthwhile folks, and move on.

(in reply to Oneechan)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:43:19 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		Read this: Why We Don't Allow Blacklists

< Message edited by NiceButMeanGirl -- 10/18/2012 12:44:16 PM >

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I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to Oneechan)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:47:17 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		This thought flitted across my mind after my one and only bad experience with someone I met here on CM. Then I realized that it was my own damn fault for not using common sense and ignoring red flags. So now, when the occasion presents itself, I remind others to use common sense and pay attention to their gut.

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Curious about the "Sluts Vote" avatars? See http://www.collarchat.com/m_4133036/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#4133036

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:48:09 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Yup, pretty much everyone would be on that list....since somewhere there is someone that thinks every single one of us is fake.

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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 12:54:17 PM   
stellauk


Posts: 1360
Status: offline 		Not really, because most people have a sense of responsibility and enough common sense to learn from mistakes and put it down to experience.

But if life is still pretty much the school playground for you then I dunno, maybe you could start a blog or something?

_____________________________

Usually when you have all the answers for something nobody is interested in listening.

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:07:10 PM   
ShadesOfTeal


Posts: 4
Joined: 7/30/2012
Status: offline 		Fine, took the journal down. And I never said blacklist, I said post. Since I had seen it on other women's profiles, and have better things to do than read the TOS of every single site I join, mea culpa. But, WOW. Real easy to sit behind your screens and type that venom against someone you don't even know. I guarantee you wouldn't be so rude to me if you met me and I had told you the story in person. So valet park that high horse and excuse me for trying to help a sista' out! Did I screw up? Yes. By having the least little faith that I would get an answer to my question, not criticism. Ya know what? I DID move on, and it's NOT High School bullshit. Red flags aren't always red... Fool me once. Got it.

(in reply to stellauk)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:08:34 PM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Oneechan

also wow, i just looked at your journal.

there are seven billion people on this planet, and rising fast. the proportion of those who are likely to read your journal, and the proportion of those who are likely to interact with the person you mention in it, are both astronomically small. the proportion of people who will do BOTH of those things is really really really double astronomically small.

you are pissing into a black hole in the middle of nowhere, for no reason. doing something that will have no effect on anyone, anywhere, ever, and getting pointlessly worked up about it.

some people are dicks. learn to recognise and identify them, to only associate with worthwhile folks, and move on.


Exactly this.

Also: Stop and think this through. Imagine you turn a guy down or whatever. He gets pissed off. He posts that you are a fake/liar/con artist. He posts your full real name and identifying features, just like you have done in your journal. How do you feel?

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to Oneechan)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:10:44 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Quit butting into everyone else's business. You just look like a noseybody and stupid.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:13:20 PM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShadesOfTeal

Fine, took the journal down. And I never said blacklist, I said post. Since I had seen it on other women's profiles, and have better things to do than read the TOS of every single site I join, mea culpa. But, WOW. Real easy to sit behind your screens and type that venom against someone you don't even know. I guarantee you wouldn't be so rude to me if you met me and I had told you the story in person. So valet park that high horse and excuse me for trying to help a sista' out! Did I screw up? Yes. By having the least little faith that I would get an answer to my question, not criticism. Ya know what? I DID move on, and it's NOT High School bullshit. Red flags aren't always red... Fool me once. Got it.


Wow, ok, we posted at the same time so I didn't get chance to respond to this.

Chill out!

So you didn't read the terms of service. Too bad! That's your responsibility and your risk to take. Not knowing the rules when they are right there - when you have to acknowledge them to sign up - is not an excuse. I know lots of people just skip over those things, but when you do and you get called out on it, don't get pissy.

You got criticism because you didn't really think things through. Your story might well be shocking to all of us but we don't know you or him, this is the big bad internet and we can only go off what we have in front of us.

And yes, what you are suggesting is blacklisting. It's also suggested fairly regularly round here, hence there being an FAQ post on it.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:21:41 PM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		You know what? I work in a high school. I hear this BS EVERY DAY.

"it wasn't my fault, the others were doing it too"

"why are you picking on me? It's not my fault I didn't read the rules properly"

"you are sooo mean - it's not fair!"

"BOOHOOHOOO I HATE YOU I'M GOING TO TELL MY MOTHER!"

Seriously 'sista', you need to get out of the playground, get back on your horse and canter back to Grownupsville.

Oh, and I absolutely would say all this to your face.

Sista.

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:22:20 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		You asked the question, We gave you not only the answers, but some logic behind the
answers. That you feel so defensive over being given the answer to your question is rather silly.

Another neat feature this site has is that anyone viewing your profile has the option
of clicking on View This Users Forum Posts. I can't imagine this attitude being favorable.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:29:16 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShadesOfTeal

Fine, took the journal down. And I never said blacklist, I said post. Since I had seen it on other women's profiles, and have better things to do than read the TOS of every single site I join, mea culpa. But, WOW. Real easy to sit behind your screens and type that venom against someone you don't even know. I guarantee you wouldn't be so rude to me if you met me and I had told you the story in person. So valet park that high horse and excuse me for trying to help a sista' out! Did I screw up? Yes. By having the least little faith that I would get an answer to my question, not criticism. Ya know what? I DID move on, and it's NOT High School bullshit. Red flags aren't always red... Fool me once. Got it.



It's okay princess.......you asked a question and didn't get the sugarcoated, sweetness and light, response you hoped for. Grow a set of ovaries. You will need them if you are going to stick around here. Otherwise, do yourself a favour, delete your account, and forget allllll about collarme.com as well as collarchat.com

Good luck with your.....whatever.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:33:54 PM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShadesOfTeal

Fine, took the journal down. And I never said blacklist, I said post. Since I had seen it on other women's profiles, and have better things to do than read the TOS of every single site I join, mea culpa. But, WOW. Real easy to sit behind your screens and type that venom against someone you don't even know. I guarantee you wouldn't be so rude to me if you met me and I had told you the story in person. So valet park that high horse and excuse me for trying to help a sista' out! Did I screw up? Yes. By having the least little faith that I would get an answer to my question, not criticism. Ya know what? I DID move on, and it's NOT High School bullshit. Red flags aren't always red... Fool me once. Got it.

Whether you call it a blacklist or not has nothing to do with whether or not it is one. (it was)
As for whether or not you read the TOS, it really doesn't matter, you are still responsible for it. Would a cop let me go if I said "I didn't see that speed limit sign"?

As for venom? Princess, you've never seen venom. This was people being nice because you're new.

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to ShadesOfTeal)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Negative Experiences? - 10/18/2012 1:34:16 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Ya know, I'll be honest. I never ever read the TOS for this site. I have always just used common sense and I've been online for sooooo long that it's basically the same blah blah blah for other sites.

I have never gone around wanting to gossip about others be it here or in real life. I don't involve myself in others' business. I have my own business to take care of. I really don't care what others do with their life.

To me when someone comes here and starts whining about pretty much anything at all, is simply childish and makes me wonder if you walk around in life making sure everyone feels sorry for you and that "everyone is picking on me" attitude. If you do, you might wanna think about learning to be an adult. You are no longer a child. Take responsibility;y for you own life, not everyone else's.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 20
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