RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (Full Version)

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Toysinbabeland -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:19:36 PM)

Watches....



Lockit -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:24:26 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Before y'all have a fucking fit, try reading the whole thread. When somebody who has been here for a while suggests the WRONG place (i.e., the train wreck thread) to toss some negativity, maybe there might be some context there.

OP, if I had been snarky towards you, (and some of these folks are right, you ain't seen snark yet) I'd have sent you a link to that nice page on what goes where in the forums.

And to Lockit, we ain't in Intros. The post didn't start in Intros, and this doesn't have jack shit about people wanting to talk about kink in Intros. If you want to put up a past post, at least do it in context.

Are you really sure that you've been ok lately?


ETA - Before anybody confuses that with snark, it's not. It's concern.




LOL... I might ask you the same question.

Now that was snark.

I am just fine. I'm busy, I get tired... but even tired I can see when someone is being bashed. It isn't rocket science. The feeding frenzy around here.. you even posted about. So you addressed introductions... I introduced a bit of... hell... be nicer to people not doing anything wrong, unless of course we want to keep this a good ol girls club.



Phoenixpower -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:27:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: absolutchocolat

quote:

Now, do something for Me, ok? Don't just flop comments in any old section because you can't find the right one. If nothing else, there is always off topic. It makes more work for the Mods and I'd rather they spent their energies where it's really needed.


yes, that little bit was condescending folks, imo. god forbid, i make the mods unhappy with this one small post. sheesh.

i placed the comment in that particular section because i felt it was relevant at the time. now, i see it has been moved, and that is fine by me. if you notice, there were other comments that gave great advice that i actually followed.

and to the seasoned posters who said some not so nice things, being a "new poster" doesn't mean i shouldn't have an opinion or that it should be somehow less valuable than yours. i do believe the rules state something about being respectful, and i stated my opinion pretty respectfully.

thanks lockit! i didn't realize this thing has taken on a life of its own until i woke up this morning. lol


well...being aware of the four side model in regards to communication (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_sides_model) I still see it as a neutral advice and therefore as the appeal LadyP made towards you....and not as condescending....where imo you take it negative on a relationship level...though, I am not really bored enough to care more about it [8|]

Good night folks [sm=sleepy.gif]



absolutchocolat -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:29:52 PM)

quote:

OP, if I had been snarky towards you, (and some of these folks are right, you ain't seen snark yet) I'd have sent you a link to that nice page on what goes where in the forums.


well, we can agree to disagree there. that wasn't even the point of the post, people!

the point of my original post was inquiring about a specific section dedicated to in-person meets that yielded less-than-positive results, because i noticed that there wasn't one. perhaps i should have been more clear. i think people can benefit from both types of forums, because when i ask people about their specific experiences on meeting people, i get polar opposite answers ("the site is full of fakes" or "i met the love of my life"). i want to know what people in the middle experience.

yes, fetlife has one, but i no longer have a fetlife account, and i was wondering why there wasn't one HERE. yes, i use my journal, but i like to get feedback from others and this is a better medium for getting feedback.



LaTigresse -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:30:03 PM)

I've often thought that............To read negativity into words where it seriously can be taken either way, says a great deal about the one assuming the negativity.




Lockit -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:35:38 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I've often thought that............To read negativity into words where it seriously can be taken either way, says a great deal about the one assuming the negativity.




LOL... I am so negative. Help me Dr. Phil.

Seriously, what is negative in seeing how people realistically get bashed, talked about and held to a standard of those doing the bashing and saying something about it? My observation. If that makes me negative in your book, you might want to read your own words.

Edit: Damn I forgot my question mark... I must need medication. (Again, snark)



LadyPact -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:35:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: absolutchocolat
well, we can agree to disagree there. that wasn't even the point of the post, people!

the point of my original post was inquiring about a specific section dedicated to in-person meets that yielded less-than-positive results, because i noticed that there wasn't one. perhaps i should have been more clear. i think people can benefit from both types of forums, because when i ask people about their specific experiences on meeting people, i get polar opposite answers ("the site is full of fakes" or "i met the love of my life"). i want to know what people in the middle experience.

yes, fetlife has one, but i no longer have a fetlife account, and i was wondering why there wasn't one HERE. yes, i use my journal, but i like to get feedback from others and this is a better medium for getting feedback.
These forums are kind of different. To get a new section, the powers that be have to create it, rather than the posters. It's not like Fet where the members can just start up a group. (Kind of why I have a group on Fet, Myself.) If you wanted to start something up that would be close, there's Polls and Random Snippets where you could start a thread of it's own for that kind of thing. Depending on whether not people contribute to it would be the determining factor of whether it would stay on the front page or not. The "I Admit" and "The Holly and Potty Show" are kind of like those.

The Train Wreck thread is kind of a happy place for funny pictures. It's almost gotten better than the Humor and Games section. That's why that was a bad suggestion made on this thread.


ETA - In rereading the bold, the "no blacklisting" thing should probably be mentioned. In other words, if you want to vent about a bad meet, don't attach a name to it.




kitkat105 -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:39:49 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Shininglight23

I love kitkat!



quote:

ORIGINAL: yourdarkdesire

Mmmm......I love kitkats, especially right out of the fridge. The cold crisp chocol........oh, sorry. You meant the person! She is pretty lovable!,


<smooch> I love you both too!



absolutchocolat -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:41:54 PM)

before i started this thread, i read a bunch of threads, including all of the ones you just mentioned. so, thank you, ladypact, for actually answering my question. i appreciate that.

this was an interesting exercise, to say the least...



LaTigresse -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:51:50 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I've often thought that............To read negativity into words where it seriously can be taken either way, says a great deal about the one assuming the negativity.




LOL... I am so negative. Help me Dr. Phil.

Seriously, what is negative in seeing how people realistically get bashed, talked about and held to a standard of those doing the bashing and saying something about it? My observation. If that makes me negative in your book, you might want to read your own words.

Edit: Damn I forgot my question mark... I must need medication. (Again, snark)


I got as far as the Dr. Phil bullshit and the rest turned into Charlie Brown grown up "Wha wha wha wha, wha, wha, whaaaa."

Because I assume, after a person purposely does the first part, the rest is worthless.



LadyPact -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:54:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: absolutchocolat

before i started this thread, i read a bunch of threads, including all of the ones you just mentioned. so, thank you, ladypact, for actually answering my question. i appreciate that.

this was an interesting exercise, to say the least...
Not a problem at all. Please do keep something in mind. Not all direction around here is good direction. Even by folks who have been around for a while and should know how the site is laid out. The threads that were mentioned here are the good get to know you type of threads. Just the casual, have fun kind of areas. All created by posters and they have stayed on the top page for months or years at a time. (Train Wreck is new in comparison, but I think it will have staying power.)




tazzygirl -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:54:27 PM)

~FR

No rants or raves or snark allowed on a thread about why there isnt a rant or rave section?

I suppose it makes sense.

~forgot to mention that was snark~



Lockit -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:54:37 PM)

LOL Give it to me baby... That was brilliant.



LaTigresse -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:57:40 PM)

Merci beaucoup.



LadyPact -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 1:59:41 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

~FR

No rants or raves or snark allowed on a thread about why there isnt a rant or rave section?

I suppose it makes sense.

~forgot to mention that was snark~
Probably a different subject, but have you noticed that there aren't as many suggestions to new posters about the fun sections to get to know people? I know it isn't done as often now because some of the people who did it don't post here anymore. Am I missing when that is happening or am I accurate in saying that it has decreased in frequency?




tazzygirl -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 2:26:55 PM)

There isnt a whole lot of directions to any sections, unless someone comes along and makes a snarky ass comment about P&R to those they dont want around.



WinsomeDefiance -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 2:36:31 PM)

I'm not a fan of concentrating the negative into one place - because it (to me) seems to unrealistically magnify the negatives and make them seem more prevalent than they necessarily are.

At the same tiime, while it might be nice (in theory) to have a specific section for Rants - I can see such a section going nasty, very nasty, very quickly.

My concern would be that, unfortunately, when sharing things of a personal nature; things that might be very sensitive and emotionally raw, the responses might be less constructive and make a bad experience even worse.

Assuming you subscribe to the theory that words can do harm on the internet. I believe very strongly in doing no harm to another, and hate to see people in a bad situation getting beat up verbally. Just goes against my nature.
That's me. My own personal, first impression, on the thoughts of a specific section for rants and bad experiences.



noellesdestiny -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 2:38:15 PM)

That's a good question.



tazzygirl -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 2:43:22 PM)

quote:

I'm not a fan of concentrating the negative into one place - because it (to me) seems to unrealistically magnify the negatives and make them seem more prevalent than they necessarily are.


I agree. A he said/she said.... or whatever the dynamic... would only devolve into a bitch fest.



DaddySatyr -> RE: why isn't there a rants & raves section? (10/22/2012 2:45:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Before y'all have a fucking fit, try reading the whole thread. When somebody who has been here for a while suggests the WRONG place (i.e., the train wreck thread) to toss some negativity, maybe there might be some context there.

OP, if I had been snarky towards you, (and some of these folks are right, you ain't seen snark yet) I'd have sent you a link to that nice page on what goes where in the forums.

And to Lockit, we ain't in Intros. The post didn't start in Intros, and this doesn't have jack shit about people wanting to talk about kink in Intros. If you want to put up a past post, at least do it in context.

Are you really sure that you've been ok lately?


ETA - Before anybody confuses that with snark, it's not. It's concern.



From the OP of the Train Wreck thread:

quote:



Okay, so all of the best banter seems to be in the threads posted by trolls, socks or just plain stupid and antagonistic people who get butt hurt. Not the sincere or life happening news of the "I Admit..." thread but rather more like settling into the kitchen with a few friends and ignoring the stupidity of the rest of the party.

So, I propose without the troll, sock or dumb ass... a train wreck thread. A place to come, hang out, bull shit, post stupid shit, insults that you would post in an actual train wreck but then would get pulled and none of us would ever see. (Hell, feel free to provide the setting if it is in reaction to a thread you know will get pulled or at least re-post it here so we can share in the lulz.

Fuck the rest of the party sometimes, and enjoy the train wreck.



Sorry but, it seemed like a good suggestion, based upon the initial intent of the thread. Also, as I have a legitimate memory issue, it was the only one I could think of off the top of my head, at the time.



Peace and comfort,



Michael



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