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Duskypearls -> RE: Introducing someone to BDSM thanks to movie (10/25/2012 9:18:56 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LonDom61
quote:
ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
Hi, Pouliche. Welcome to the forums.
The bad news is that there's no way you'll get a BDSM relationship with her. The good news is that's not what you want anyway. You just want kink in bed.
Your idea is to show her some movie that will turn on a switch in her head and she will realize that this is what she really wants. That switch ain't there.
My suggestion is to see if you can change your relationship into one where it's okay to try stuff in bed, to see how well it works. Have a conversation with her in which you DO NOT mention your desire to get tied up, in which you speak more abstractly. Is there something she's wanted to try? What kind of emotions does she feel when she plays with you? How does she view you? How do you feel then? Etc.
Once you know the above, you'll be better able to know whether this might be good for her and, if so, how to approach her.
I do get quite concerned that:
1. She's not willing to make a one-time experiment with bondage in a 2 year relationship, and
2. That you're looking at ending a 2 year relationship due to you wanting to experienced a one-time fantasy.
The relationship's not as secure as it should be.
This response is permeated right down to its component electrons on your screen with WIN.
DarkSteven...I'm not on the boards much. (Well, have been back a fair bit lately, I guess.) I see your posts a lot. From what I recall, they are always considered, wise, kind, resourceful and--if heeded--helpful.
You, sir, are a good guy. So say I.
Right you are, Lon, we are incredibly lucky to have DarkSteven, and I am pleased to know you appreciate him. He is a gem, inside and out, on paper and in person, and I can say that in all truth, as I know him personally. He was actually the wickedly wonderful fellow who invited to my very first party, kept me safely and securely under his wing that evening (until I sprouted wings), while explaining to me so much of that which I did not know about the lifestyle, scening, the nomenclature, etc., etc. He did, and continues to do me, such a good turn. Never has he failed me, and I still do call upon him, from time to time. He is strong, kind, generous, level-headed, funny, informed and just an all around good guy. (I luv ya Steven, can't ya tell?! I'm proud and honored to know you. You are true blue, my friend.)
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