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What is your definition of a training collar - 1/18/2004 7:31:31 AM

obedientsub4You

Posts: 2
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

To me a training collar is just what it implies. When I was learning about the lifestyle and being trained by a mentor, I did not have a physical collar around my neck, but there was a collar there at all times. He was training me to become a slave, an asset to my eventual Master. He was my protector when someone approached me for play. He handled the negogiation process and made sure He was there during the play itself. I technically belonged to Him, but was just getting prepared to leave His service.

Opinions anyone?

obs4u

Post #: 1

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/19/2004 9:19:03 PM

DocHolliday

Posts: 25
Joined: 1/10/2004
Status: offline

you seem to have what I call a Collar of Protection as well as a Training Collar, but when you can get two for the price of one....what the heck, right? They're both very good to have for someone new to the lifestyle.

(in reply to obedientsub4You)

Post #: 2

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/26/2004 3:23:27 PM

LadyCalliah

Posts: 4
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: New Hampsha
Status: offline

To me, a training collar is something that you are given when you first enter into a play and/or service agreement with someone. It could be a physical collar or mental, but in My mind, it would mean "ok, you're only playing with me now, but you've got alot to learn".

Just My .02

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"Ultimately, the purpose of a flogging is to inflict pleasure." Mitch Kessler

(in reply to DocHolliday)

Post #: 3

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/27/2004 5:58:40 AM

trnmastr

Posts: 24
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

In all honesty all these differant collars has cheapened what a collar stands for.
It used to be when you saw someone with a collar it meant they were owned, period.
Today you have no idea, people walk around with them around their neck for a multiude of reasons, or for no reason at all.
What this does is puts someone who is truly collared at risk. Why? Because when you are in a public setting people do not honor a collar like it should be.
Heres an example:
When at an event some Doms may tell their subs not to look or talk to others, let alone touch anyone. Someone walks up to her, starts a conversation or even attempts to shake her hand. Well if any of this happens, if she makes eye contact, if she says a word if he touches her guess who gets into trouble?
Bottomline is that when someone is offered a collar the relationship should be already casted in cement it should not be used as a protection device thats what we have our mouths for simply tell the person what is going on with you. If you have a mentor and that person requires anything you do to be cleared through them then say so. If they wont listen to you then they are jerks.

(in reply to LadyCalliah)

Post #: 4

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/27/2004 7:59:11 AM

LK

Posts: 11
Joined: 1/25/2004
Status: offline

... I have to agree with trnmastr. With me there is only one collar, that of ownership.

submissives / slaves are perfectly capable of telling someone to take a flying leap. As to training??? I can't imagine how someone could train a boy or girl to my needs. Thats for me to do. The process of moving someone from my submissive to my slave would be a long one, during that time we would be building trust and the relationship. I don't think there is such a thing as an "off the rack" slave.

As a matter of fact, I would likely consider someone who has benn "trained" under someone else a draw back. They will come to you thinking they know exactly what to do to please you, and they can't possibly. Both will be dissapointed. Now if you are talking about learning basic protocol ect. That is easily done by getting to know the people in your local RT groups. But even protocols could be different with the Dominant you finally choose.

LK

(in reply to trnmastr)

Post #: 5

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/27/2004 9:19:19 PM

SherriA

Posts: 544
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: trnmastr

Heres an example:
When at an event some Doms may tell their subs not to look or talk to others, let alone touch anyone. Someone walks up to her, starts a conversation or even attempts to shake her hand. Well if any of this happens, if she makes eye contact, if she says a word if he touches her guess who gets into trouble?

I think that it's incumbent on the dominant to give his/her partner the tools to deal with these situations, if they can reasonably be expected to happen. I've seen various ways of dealing with it, from simple to really creative. Unless you (generic you) intend to set someone up to fail, it seems only natural that you'd set out guidelines for these types of situations, particularly if you had any sense that your partner wasn't going to be able to deal with them on his/her own.

It's not the fault of the other folks at the event, if they don't know what games you're (again, generic you) playing. The associated protocols vary much too widely to expect others who haven't been forewarned to know what's appropriate for the people in question. If you're going to set up this type of situation, shouldn't it also be your responsibility to plan for these types of potential problems?

JMNSHO, of course.

For me, a collar is simply a fashion accessory. If i'm wearing one, it's because it looks hot with my outfit. So what do I know?

-- Sherri

< Message edited by SherriA -- 1/28/2004 12:20:12 AM >

_____________________________

-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

(in reply to trnmastr)

Post #: 6

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/28/2004 12:20:18 AM

EStrict

Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline

Actually, in any place I have been that is lifestyle related, it is not acceptable to touch ANYONE without their permission. And, if Trnmstr is talking about a *public vanilla* situation, then the unknown dominant is wrong (IMO) because in giving such conditions (no touch/look) that affect other's that have not consented to following his rules. Just my opinion though.. don't expect everyone to agree :)

Sandy

(in reply to SherriA)

Post #: 7

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/29/2004 8:41:19 PM

inyouagain

Posts: 418
Joined: 1/6/2004
Status: offline

I've never noticed shaking hands as being taboo, but approaching someone's parked sub is sonsidered tacky. A good sub will indicate the interested one has no chance by following their Dom/me's orders, explicitly. If they do not make eye contact, or return an offered handshake, then the interested one should respect their obedience, forget their package and recognize his/her faux paus, and attempt to act graciously, knowing the sub's Dom/me is the only possible route to taste/enjoy/use/abuse the desired sub.

I saw no mention of vanilla public?

(in reply to EStrict)

Post #: 8

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 1/30/2004 10:49:03 AM

EStrict

Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline

By that meant a munch in a vanilla establishment and not something like a private club or home.

Sandy

(in reply to inyouagain)

Post #: 9

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/24/2004 2:24:07 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

My training collar is worn by any be they
Dominant or subjudicant whom desire to
learn at My hand My Lifestyle choices to
My perfection and to My practice. They
then learn and earn the right to hold My
name as Their mentor within Our Lifestyle
circles. I earned My Ladyship within My
BDSM Society in 1979.

Ohhhh Gawd how that number makes Me
look OLD!!!

(in reply to obedientsub4You)

Post #: 10

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/24/2004 8:18:37 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

One that shocks if the puppy barks at inopportune times.

(in reply to obedientsub4You)

Post #: 11

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/24/2004 2:35:39 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

quote:

One that shocks if the puppy barks at inopportune times.

LMAO, thanks for all the laughs today Merc.

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 12

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/24/2004 6:40:34 PM

krikket

Posts: 1183
Joined: 11/17/2004
From: Washington, DC Metro Area
Status: offline

i think the meaning behind a collar is pretty much what the parties involved want it to mean. i've only worn one collar, and to us it meant that i was owned, completely. To others a training collar, a collar of protection, etc., are for the participants, not anyone else.

As for touching another...seems to be that, except for handshakes, touching another ('nilla or not) could earn someone a fat lip or a piece of someone's mind. Then again, if that's the case, maybe they do need another's piece mind..lol.

cheers
jimini

_____________________________

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bloom."

by A. Nin

When your heart speaks take good notes.

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 13

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/25/2004 6:34:05 AM

LordODiscipline

Posts: 995
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

My definition of a training collar, is that the person giving it to another has not decided whether to collar someone in any permanent way - and, desires to 'mark their territory' (imagine peeing on bushes) without the commitment involved.

It denotes someone looking for the candy from a gumball machine without desiring to pay the quarter, someone who seeks the benefit without the work, a person who seeks play without the pay, the authority without the responsibility and to do the crime without the time -

Now that I have exhausted the cliches in my kit....

Why would anyone desire to give a collar that has no absolute meaning or significance?

Why does a period of training require a collar at all?

Why not just train the person (if that is the arrangement that one has) and at the end of the period bestow them with a degree or form or certificate of accomplishment (you can get these at Staples or produce them enmasse through various software applications)?

It appear the ‘pomp’ without the ‘circumstance’ (ok - I had another cliche kicking about to use)....

I feel the same way about "collar of protection" (an incredibly ridiculous concept that has absolutely no basis in reality - although I have heard some pretty fantastical rationalizations) and others that have popped up on line as part of the cyber fantasy and been brought into the real world as a continuance of the soap opera fantasy found there.

Just a thought or two.

~J

< Message edited by LordODiscipline -- 12/25/2004 6:39:20 AM >

(in reply to obedientsub4You)

Post #: 14

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/25/2004 8:49:30 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

an incredibly ridiculous concept that has absolutely no basis in reality

Maybe not in YOUR reality LoD but for many Others it IS a reality and a concept used and accepted in some circles....... Obviously not one You run in....

(in reply to LordODiscipline)

Post #: 15

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/25/2004 8:30:10 PM

LordODiscipline

Posts: 995
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDREAD

Maybe not in YOUR reality LoD but for many Others it IS a reality and a concept used and accepted in some circles....... Obviously not one You run in....[/font]

I wouldn't even consider walking in one....

But, thank you for playing.

~J

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

Post #: 16

RE: What is your definition of a training collar - 12/27/2004 12:37:36 PM

RealityFix

Posts: 156
Joined: 8/12/2004
Status: offline

I don't use them.

Why mark territory you have on idea of owning or not?

And if you do, isn't that being selfish, and ruining thier chances with another who can do BETTER by them?

As far as high protocol, I don't go to places where Dominants(or subs, for that matter)
are so out of control and disrespectful that they feel free to intrude into the relationships of others, in an attempt to "poach".

That's already enough to tell me that the venue itself is blighted, and it's sponsors have no control over the member's conduct. Not a good enviornment.

(in reply to LordODiscipline)

Post #: 17

RE: What is; training collar - 1/17/2005 2:55:54 PM

garylee

Posts: 38
Joined: 12/15/2004
From: from? iowa.....
Status: offline

i am unsure how to answer this......
i feel there are maybe.....enough answers for the same amount of people.....you would probably get a wide variety of answers.
but what is mine?????///
i dunno that this concept is actually a reality........and more fantasy.
i cannot say much about it....except.......i had a standard collar of acceptance for my 1st mistress i had for 15 months....and now that i am working-on my 2nd ma'am....i am a live-in 24/7 under consideration.......but there is no collar involved.......i am a free agent for 90 days....i belong to no one.
there is no contract and never will be. it is ALL by ''your word is your bond''.
there are many concepts of the lifestyle..i have heard of....and the same exact number of those i will never experience.
garylee

_____________________________

i see the world, i notice it is turning, as my guitar gently weeps.

(in reply to RealityFix)

Post #: 18

RE: What is; training collar - 1/17/2005 3:13:18 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

I have a slightly different take on this one.

The people I play with call a collar worn in activly play only a "training collar." That is, it's a collar that someone puts on you for the duration of a spesific activity. I have a collar I wear all the time. It's not particularly suited to some types of play the way a collar with several o-rings is. The o-ring collar I put on is a "training collar."

To us, it implies no commitment and is simply a tool. So, I guess with us, "training collar" equates to "suspension cuffs" or "rope."

This is just our use of the -ism though :)

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to garylee)

Post #: 19

RE: What is; training collar - 1/17/2005 4:39:30 PM

Vinmal

Posts: 3
Joined: 1/16/2005
Status: offline

Why not just have the sub where a sign of some kind or a button? Like -"Please Understand I am absolutly Forbidden to Speak or Look at Anyone""No Exception"- this would go especially nice if female sub was dressed as a little girl - white party dress - ribbon on hair- patent leather shoes - anklet white socks etc. ---How about the additions of a waist cain with both hands loosely hooked uo as in courthouses and a loose legs shackle ? effect would be substantial on a crowd in a lesbian leather bar

Almost like Moths to a Flame ? Somebody must have done it ??

(in reply to perverseangelic)

Post #: 20

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