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Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 3:23:16 PM

heartfeltsub

Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

i see so many profiles from people who are sadists who say they are looking for masochists and they always make me wonder, because if inflicting pain is what arouses a person sexually, if the person receiving the pain processes it as pleasure, i would think that would lessen the "pleasure" of inflicting the pain. Hence the question.

Thank you in advance for your answers.

heartfelt

*editted because i can't seem to type lately.

< Message edited by heartfeltsub -- 6/15/2006 3:25:32 PM >

Post #: 1

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 3:26:45 PM

missalice

Posts: 38
Joined: 5/21/2006
Status: offline

I prefer to play with people who enjoy pain.... or perhaps, even more.. people who enjoy doing things they dislike.. if that makes any sense... hehe.. i told my subbie boy i was coming back from a business trip with lots of new toys, but not to get excited because they were toys he wouldn't like.. and he got more excited because he really enjoys submitting to things he dislikes...

confusing, indeed.

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 2

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 3:29:05 PM

Notsweet

Posts: 873
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline

Terrific question--I've always wondered that myself....
(hate the pain, love the submission)

(in reply to missalice)

Post #: 3

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 5:39:14 PM

Noah

Posts: 1660
Joined: 7/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

i see so many profiles from people who are sadists who say they are looking for masochists and they always make me wonder, because if inflicting pain is what arouses a person sexually, if the person receiving the pain processes it as pleasure, i would think that would lessen the "pleasure" of inflicting the pain. Hence the question.

Thank you in advance for your answers.

heartfelt

*editted because i can't seem to type lately.

The experiences which my partners and I deal in are not one-dimensional, either/or sorts of things. Like most people, I suppose, I value the experience of art, music, etc, which operates--and operates upon me--at various levels simultaneously. And non-simultaneously, come to think of it. If the currents at one level run contrary to the currents at another I certainly don't see this as a weakness in a piece of art. Quite the contrary.

Your post, for which I thank you, and its similarity to so many posts in this and similar forums almost every day, testify to the fact that there is a contraryness, maybe even a paradox, near the heart of S&M. Some people come near a paradox and immediately reach for their tools, insisting that this must be resolved into something simpler. I think that sometimes no resolution is possible beyond a personal resolution to experience the paradox for all it is worth.

At the very least I like my interactions to be physical, psychological, emotional, and spiritual. Complexities, including conflicts, can exist on any given level so of course they can exist between levels. That this is so doesn't trouble me in the least, and I have no urge to boil down the whole nor any part, nor dissect and label it.

Maybe you are a person who likes to analyze things. That's cool. In the case of genuine paradox , though, analysis is good for little more than a sort of isometric mental exercise. I'm not against thinking things through, but analysis is only one mental tool among many. There are lots of modes of thought. I suspect that analysis tends to be overused, and simple reflection with awareness of feelings tends to be underused.

I can't assure you that the case at hand represents genuine paradox, but based on the frequency of the question I suspect that this may be an issue which doesn't submit itself readily to analysis. Mightn't it be nice to leave the analyzing behind for a while? Just crawl under someone's boot and gape in wonder at the inward and outward beauty of it all?

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 4

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 5:52:20 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline

I agree, Noah. Not being much of an essayist, I would like to say that a certain amount of analytical exam is worthwhile, but not with the expectation of actually defining something that can't be defined.

And, as for answering the either/or question posed by the OP, I can definitely say: "Yes!"

Bob

_____________________________

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro--Hunter S. Thompson
It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide!--Chief Dead St. Knockout, 1933, Liverpool
Damn the crops. I'll only find peace at the end of a rope.--Winston Van Loo, 1911

(in reply to Noah)

Post #: 5

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 6:01:16 PM

kickinchick

Posts: 129
Joined: 10/20/2005
Status: offline

me too rat

(in reply to DesertRat)

Post #: 6

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 6:25:24 PM

sadisticmaster11

Posts: 21
Joined: 8/11/2005
Status: offline

The ultimate extreme is to take someone off the street and do what you enjoy as far as giving pain... but there are laws and penaltys for that.

The next step is to find someone who enjoys it or someone who will submit to it and either way, it is a concensual act. I enjoy someone who likes pain and will take whatever I give her and I also enjoy a slave who will take pain whether she likes it or not.

In the classic sense, all of this that we do is abnormal, sometimes insane, especially to those not in the lifestyle and have no understanding of what we do or why we do it. I know drunks, drug users, cutters, people with mental problems. What they do and why they do it are often a mystery to me. I figure out the pattern and understand how the pattern works. Once you understand the patterns people exhibit, then you can deal with them because you can anticipate their actions.

I am a sadist. I dont know why. I was loved as a child and nurtured; disciplined when I was bad, but never anything severe. Somewhere along the way, I met girls who liked rougher, edgier sex, and I got a taste for it and the taste got stronger over the years.

I like it and that is the bottom line.

(in reply to kickinchick)

Post #: 7

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 6:40:12 PM

cillydom

Posts: 332
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline

It doesn’t matter their level of pain tolerance to me I like to go beyond it to the point that they are enduring it for me. And yes I find it arousing.

Someone that enjoys pain will give you a better workout though, lol.

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 8

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 6:43:34 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear heartfeltsub, Ladies and Gentlemen;

In my travels through the lifestyle, I have engauged in S&M.

The ones who submit for my sake, to my pain does effect me in a different manner than someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake.

I'm more arroused for the one who submits to pain in pleasing me. It is a submission that endears me to them beyond the sensual aspects, giving me the empowerment vibes, submitting for my pleasure beyond their own, so I am more attracted to the submission rather than the administration of pain. I prefer the option of inflicting sadism and the degrees with such slaves/submissives.

Those who are masochists, that enjoy pain and are sexually aroused by my administrations are not what gets me sexually aroused as much but, gives me delight and pleasure, giving me a platform to administer a lot of creative means of mind, emotional and physical sadism. With these individuals who enjoys pain for pain's sake; it is an expectation of a Sadist to deliver pain and gives no options to deny pain.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 9

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 6:51:47 PM

Tamerofwild1s

Posts: 1765
Joined: 12/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

i see so many profiles from people who are sadists who say they are looking for masochists and they always make me wonder, because if inflicting pain is what arouses a person sexually, if the person receiving the pain processes it as pleasure, i would think that would lessen the "pleasure" of inflicting the pain. Hence the question.

Thank you in advance for your answers.

heartfelt

*editted because i can't seem to type lately.

OK ... for me this is double edged ... I am a SadistI love sessioning with a girl who can take all I have to give but there is also that need for it to be something that maybe under normal circumstances she would not take . but because it fulfills my needs she goes the extra mile .... I also love taking a rather new girl to "pain" and showing her and treaching her how to take the pain and mix it with pleasure for a rewarding night she will never forget. If I get her into subspace while doing that ... BONUS. as of recently I have started training on the pain aspect of the life .... if that makes sense . but I love taking a girl who says pain is not for her and giving it too her good . my way . slow with a build up to all out . and watching her reaction as at the end of it she is a puddle of cum as a result of it.

_____________________________

A building get torched. All that is left is ashes. I used to think that it is true about everything - family, friends, feelings - but now I know that sometimes if love proves real, and two people are meant to be together, nothing can keep them apart ~

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 10

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 7:07:48 PM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

I prefer to play with someone who enjoys it and has a high tolerance. I desire that my sub go into subspace, I find it very exciting to know that I put them there.

After he's in subspace for awhile, I let the play course change because by then I'm ready for the sex part of it. Torturing someone makes me horny

and it does the same for my sub, after he comes down from subspace he's ready to perform the rest of his duties which is giving me all the orgasms I desire.

~Lashra

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 11

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 7:17:57 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

Noah... great to see you back! Look forward as all ways to what you have to contribute.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Noah)

Post #: 12

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 7:51:35 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

As a sadist... I have no preferences. What matters is that whoever I play with, that we maximize the gratification of those involved in the play. Everyone has there own uniqueness and it is the play that allows us to discover this.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 13

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 7:55:06 PM

Noah

Posts: 1660
Joined: 7/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Noah... great to see you back! Look forward as all ways to what you have to contribute.

Thanks Knight.

And unlike some drunken losers we could mention I didn't even have to sneak back in wearing a dress.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 14

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 8:13:55 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Noah
...I didn't even have to sneak back in wearing a dress.

But you could have, and, as long as it wasn't a cheap knockoff, no one would have thought poorly of you. Maybe you can wear something nice for us tomorrow.

Bob

_____________________________

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro--Hunter S. Thompson
It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide!--Chief Dead St. Knockout, 1933, Liverpool
Damn the crops. I'll only find peace at the end of a rope.--Winston Van Loo, 1911

(in reply to Noah)

Post #: 15

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 8:35:46 PM

MadamShy

Posts: 173
Joined: 3/21/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

i see so many profiles from people who are sadists who say they are looking for masochists and they always make me wonder, because if inflicting pain is what arouses a person sexually, if the person receiving the pain processes it as pleasure, i would think that would lessen the "pleasure" of inflicting the pain. Hence the question.

Thank you in advance for your answers.

heartfelt

*editted because i can't seem to type lately.

I can only speak for Me no one else

I prefure a Masochist sometimes ..because watching there back stripe and decorating there body with welts excites Me .. as does there tears and the way they smile thru it all and show there arousel seems to get Me off ..

I have been called a Empath ... when they go into subspace I seem to partially go with them....

do not I require them to be seasoned , I love newbies that there desired in tbere minds tell them they want to feel the pain yet never experianced at same time ... I love to use My toys and watch them go into subspace for the first time [love to break there subspace cherry]... and no its NOT always My first play session with them but Me guideing them to My world of stripes and welts...

I also like helping those that have so much emotional pain that normally would harm themselves that come to me and shutter in the hated pain they hold feeling it ebb out of them while I give them what they want .,.... undesired pain YET needed pain....

also ... dear P/people . ..... sadism isn't always about the physical pain a good Mind Fuk is great also ... I love them

and on same mind subject ruling a person with there own emotions and playing with them is also delishous.... I love to do it to RI registry people....

there are so many delish ways of being a sadist ...

and Never having to force it on anyone

but the one thing I don't like

is someone in someway only doing it and suffering down the pain ... even if for Me.... I do not like hurt bodys and hurt hearts and cause perminate Mental anguish this would hurt Me twice as much if given to another and never a thrill

there are so many things a slave/sub/pet can do to please Me taking pain mental or physical isn't nessicary .... leave it to the ones that Love it ... for they feed My need the best..

otherwise attaching clothspins to a penis that is flacid ... is boreing I love the standing hamptons ..

_____________________________

Madam Shy
Head Domina
Bitch of Club Hell
Providence RI

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 16

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/15/2006 9:39:47 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

I actually like playing with those who are not masochists or have a lower pain tolerance but don't safeword out of scenes because of it. I like to see a target sweat, hear them scream, watch their blood flow and I like causing those reactions.. it's what charges my energy stores. Squirms and wiggles, sharp intakes of breath from the bite of a buggy whip.. mmmm.. delish! If I'm feeling expansive, I can always do more warm up, but for me, that's not as satisfying.

I guess, bottom line, their motivation is hopefully that they want to play with me for the sake of playing with me.. because that's my motivation for playing with them. I want to play with people who are high energy and give back to me what I give to them through my weapons and mind.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to MadamShy)

Post #: 17

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 5:49:29 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Noah:

quote:

And unlike some drunken losers we could mention I didn't even have to sneak back in wearing a dress.

Thank goodness......I don't want to have the visual of you in a dress. Just saying.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Noah)

Post #: 18

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 6:09:40 AM

heartfeltsub

Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline

Thank you all for your input. As a submissive who plays with a Sadist from time to time, i do experience the "Just crawl under someone's boot and gape in wonder at the inward and outward beauty of it all? ", however as someone who is not sadistic, i do not understand the mind set of a sadist, so i had to pose the question.

Yes i am one who likes to analyze things, figures out why i do what i do or want what i want. i pose questions to myself when i see an action of mine that strikes me as curious, like why do i play with a sadist when i am not a masochist and sadists frankly scare me. But another reason i posed the question, is that i do like to figure things out.

i also realize there is a range of experience and personal preferences, so was in fact trying to tap into that range of experience and preferences. And thank you again for the range of answers, they were very enlightening. Though i have concluded i will never understand the Dominant mindset (grinning).

< Message edited by heartfeltsub -- 6/16/2006 6:11:43 AM >

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 19

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 6:18:22 AM

SaphireLynn

Posts: 145
Joined: 2/15/2005
Status: offline

I enjoy playing with a slave that does not enjoy the pain, but will endure it because it pleases Me...

_____________________________

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
But he that dares not grasp the thorn
Should never crave the rose.
~~~Anne Bronte~~~
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 20

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