at His request

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

at His request

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> at His request

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

at His request - 6/15/2006 7:11:12 PM

chercher

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline

Hello, I am writing this at the direction of my Master. I was given a simple list of daily tasks to perform, and I did not complete them. I have no excuse or explanation. I have been punished with corner time and eye contact and speech restriction for a small amount of time. As with most things, the disappointment in His voice carries far more shame than the discipline. I have been asked to post here and ask for any suggestions on how I might better remember in the future. Thank you for your time, chercher

Post #: 1

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:15:42 PM

JohnWarren

Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: chercher

Hello, I am writing this at the direction of my Master. I was given a simple list of daily tasks to perform, and I did not complete them. I have no excuse or explanation. I have been punished with corner time and eye contact and speech restriction for a small amount of time. As with most things, the disappointment in His voice carries far more shame than the discipline. I have been asked to post here and ask for any suggestions on how I might better remember in the future. Thank you for your time, chercher

Do you have no interest in pleasing him? Isn't the fact that you have displeased him sufficient cause for you to remember not to repeat the activity? Really, if these simple facts aren't enough, there is little enough he can do. Maybe his next slave will do better.

Get the point!

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to chercher)

Post #: 2

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:19:04 PM

irishbynature

Posts: 551
Joined: 5/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: chercher

I have been punished with corner time and eye contact and speech restriction for a small amount of time.

Release yourself. If you aren't "up" to the lifestyle his way , then maybe it's you who isn't happy with the relationship?

_____________________________

What seems nasty, painful, or evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, for those who have the vision to recognize it as such. Henry Miller

(in reply to chercher)

Post #: 3

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:22:29 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

quote:

I have been asked to post here and ask for any suggestions on how I might better remember in the future.

It helps me to make a list every morning of all that i need to do that day. I love checking things off, gives me a feeling of accomplishment. But i am about to turn 60 so my memory isn't what it used to be.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to chercher)

Post #: 4

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:30:26 PM

slavejali

Posts: 2918
Status: offline

Choose to make him your number one priority...then the things he asks of you will be easily put into action.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 5

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:31:38 PM

desertdancer

Posts: 1095
Joined: 5/12/2006
Status: offline

Whoah the crowd is harsh but right on tonight. Your job in the D/s relationship is to simply do as your told. If you struggle in doing that, then the question isn't 'how can I remember next time' but 'why do I want to act out?'. We all have lapses, we all have moments when if we drop one egg we feel like dropping the whole carton and adding to the mess, but when we do that we have to figure out why we did it, or else we will do it again. Were you feeling bratish? Were you feeling a lack of attention? Were you pms'ing and just felt stubborn? Were you angry or feeling any resentment towards your Master at all? I ask because you most likely didn't forget to do things, you made a decision not to do them, maybe not a conscious decision, but you made one none the less.

I have moments when I act out, and the moment I do, I think, "oh no, what have you done!?" by the time I ask myself that, it's usually to late, and that look has entered his eyes. I have less and less moments like this, they normally only come the first day of PMS, but I am aware that I can do that, I don't like that I can act out once and a while so I strive to behave.

His pleasure should be all that's needed to remind yourself to do your daily tasks, if it's truly an issue of just forgetting, maybe you can write yourself a note and post it on the TV or computer screen or fridge to remind you

Good luck,
dancer

_____________________________

* Shimmy Shimmy *

(in reply to irishbynature)

Post #: 6

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:40:31 PM

OTKkindaGirl

Posts: 447
Joined: 12/26/2005
From: NW Arkansas
Status: offline

Chercher,

Keeping a list is fine if it is a lapse in memory that kept you from completing your tasks. If it was poor management of time, make the effort of writing the amount of time you think it will take, to accomplish each task next to the task itself and be realistic. Once it becomes routine you wont need a list and you'll be able to figure out where free time to yourself fits in as well. It doesn't sound like you meant to be displeasing but if you just really don't care then your actions or rather lack of actions does speak volumes.
Peace be with you sister.

_____________________________

~~ lil darlin' ~~
hope

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 7

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:41:22 PM

reticence

Posts: 180
Joined: 2/28/2006
Status: offline

I have to agree with everyone else. Pleasing him has to be your priority. I do realize that probably asking us how you could do better next time,was part of this assignment, so i am not going to chastise you for asking that. The key for me is just keeping myself in the moment, sometimes that means micro-stepping my thought process so i make sure i am doing all that i was told to do. Remember, when he has forgiven you, you need to forgive youself. Keep a cheerful heart.

(in reply to desertdancer)

Post #: 8

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:45:22 PM

desertdancer

Posts: 1095
Joined: 5/12/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: reticence

I. Remember, when he has forgiven you, you need to forgive youself. Keep a cheerful heart.

That's very good advise. I think some of us can go right on punishing ourselves even after they have forgiven us, and it's not our job to punish. Reticence, I'm going to remember this quote, thank you.

~dancer

_____________________________

* Shimmy Shimmy *

(in reply to reticence)

Post #: 9

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:45:27 PM

marieToo

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

chercher:

You said yourself that you were given a simple list of daily tasks. In reading your post I wondered why you chose not to complete the list, if it was simple. If something was causing you some inner conflict, or moving to close towards a limit, then there could be an explanation for disobeying or resisting. Why do you think you didn't obey the simple list? Do you think maybe you are testing your Master?

(in reply to desertdancer)

Post #: 10

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 7:51:22 PM

reticence

Posts: 180
Joined: 2/28/2006
Status: offline

. Reticence, I'm going to remember this quote, thank you.

~dancer

I am honored (smile) and you are very welcome. I need to remember those words myself... they are easy to say and difficult to do sometimes.

(in reply to desertdancer)

Post #: 11

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:03:31 PM

spankmepink11

Posts: 1310
Joined: 9/28/2005
Status: offline

chercher,
I would wonder what the tasks were...and the reason you believe you did not complete them.

As for how you might remember better in the future. The memory of the dissapointment i caused is usually enough of a reminder for me. But if you have a faulty memory...or time management issues then lists can be great tools.

good luck

< Message edited by spankmepink11 -- 6/15/2006 8:04:38 PM >

(in reply to reticence)

Post #: 12

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:04:11 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

I get the feeling that this is part of the punishment.. public shaming. I will not be a part of your punishment as I will not be included into your punishment without my prior consent.

I am left to ponder if the point is to publically shame you and to have others here reinforce his punishment of you, is this consensual for us to be dragged into your punishment? I want no part in the matter...

Good luck and Peace!

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to chercher)

Post #: 13

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:05:28 PM

chercher

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline

John,

Thanks for the kind words. My post was part of my assignment. Your reply made me grateful for the man I call Master.

chercher

(in reply to JohnWarren)

Post #: 14

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:08:20 PM

chercher

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: irishbynature

quote:

ORIGINAL: chercher

I have been punished with corner time and eye contact and speech restriction for a small amount of time.

Release yourself. If you aren't "up" to the lifestyle his way , then maybe it's you who isn't happy with the relationship?

Gee, thanks for the quick response. May I respectufully suggest you take a little more time pondering the question prior to shooting off a hostile answer?

(in reply to irishbynature)

Post #: 15

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:09:29 PM

chercher

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub

quote:

I have been asked to post here and ask for any suggestions on how I might better remember in the future.

It helps me to make a list every morning of all that i need to do that day. I love checking things off, gives me a feeling of accomplishment. But i am about to turn 60 so my memory isn't what it used to be.

Point taken. Thank you.

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 16

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:10:58 PM

chercher

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: desertdancer

Whoah the crowd is harsh but right on tonight. Your job in the D/s relationship is to simply do as your told. If you struggle in doing that, then the question isn't 'how can I remember next time' but 'why do I want to act out?'. We all have lapses, we all have moments when if we drop one egg we feel like dropping the whole carton and adding to the mess, but when we do that we have to figure out why we did it, or else we will do it again. Were you feeling bratish? Were you feeling a lack of attention? Were you pms'ing and just felt stubborn? Were you angry or feeling any resentment towards your Master at all? I ask because you most likely didn't forget to do things, you made a decision not to do them, maybe not a conscious decision, but you made one none the less.

I have moments when I act out, and the moment I do, I think, "oh no, what have you done!?" by the time I ask myself that, it's usually to late, and that look has entered his eyes. I have less and less moments like this, they normally only come the first day of PMS, but I am aware that I can do that, I don't like that I can act out once and a while so I strive to behave.

His pleasure should be all that's needed to remind yourself to do your daily tasks, if it's truly an issue of just forgetting, maybe you can write yourself a note and post it on the TV or computer screen or fridge to remind you

Good luck,
dancer

(((dancer)))

Thank you for the thoughtful reply. I will follow your suggestions.

Be well.

(in reply to desertdancer)

Post #: 17

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:17:19 PM

chercher

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I get the feeling that this is part of the punishment.. public shaming. I will not be a part of your punishment as I will not be included into your punishment without my prior consent.

I am left to ponder if the point is to publically shame you and to have others here reinforce his punishment of you, is this consensual for us to be dragged into your punishment? I want no part in the matter...

Good luck and Peace!

julia,

Thank you for your comments. I also thought it was a matter of public shaming, but Master says that was not the case.

Thank you all for your kind and thoughtful comments. It was part acting out, part forgetfulness, and part assuming it would go unnoticed. Master does not always respond when I am in error, immediately. That does add to the shock of the discipline, although I am not sure he knew this. I shall do my best to avoid having to write posts like this in the future.

Be well my sisters and brothers in submission,

chercher

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Post #: 18

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:22:19 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear chercher, Ladies and Gentlemen;

As a dominant, I would have to ask how long was this 'simple' list of daily tasks. Sometimes slaves/submissives bite off more than they can chew, as far as tasks they can complete and leads a dominant to "believe" and or "assume" that you can complete them all.

As a dominant, I would also wonder and explore; if it was a form of manipulation as to cause more attention to yourself--being it negative or positive, any would be better than none at all. This really comes to the front, when the relationship gets in a rut and no "affirmation" of submission is obtained without provoking a dominant into an action or behavior to feed your submission because, the dominant has lapsed in their duties to feed your submission on their own.

Most people who are accustom to negativities and failure will do things un-wittingly that causes negative reactions. It is a comfort level per se.
It also has no surprises--as, anticipation of the results is known ahead of time. Sometimes, the mental and emotional thread that runs in your mind prevents you from success and pleasing someone. So, it is sabatoged just on how a person approaches it. It is similar to saying; "I want to be happy but....." The "but" is the switch to trip happy to sadness. It is like someone's praises on how well you did and then they say but...then floods you with negatives and cancels your praises and leaves you deflated. This is why I personally make a point of getting the negatives out first, address them and praise last--that is the last thing I say and one will remember.

Success is learned. So, perhaps as a dominant I would not give a list but one task. As soon as you learn how much it pleases the dominant in doing the one task well, you can learn how it feels to be a success and not feel as a failure. Submission should feel like a 'high' and a state of happiness words fail to express well. Serving should be from wanting to and not having to do service, such as tasks. As you feel the joy of doing something pleasing, then perhaps add another task. It takes time and patience.

That said, I will also say; that slaves need to do their part also. A Master cannot be expected to haul your ashes and his also. You need to communicate what helps him, to help you.

Sometimes, it is a matter of "thinking" that one is slave and are frustrated due to reality and not the romance, the sex, the play and such of every day 'M/s' and or 'D/s' relationships. It is finding that recipe that makes you -- you. Perhaps you are slave but, not for this particular Master. Perhaps you aren't slave at all but, submissive. You hold the key. You are the master of your choices, your will, your power, your journey, your goals and the success and or failures in your life. You hold the key and or answers, dominants are the ones who help you find them.

Knowing the consequences for failure of doing the Master's will is known and has degrees. Perhaps the Master will also give you the rewards of success, so you know what success will bring, such as a few hours BDSM fun. That is between you both.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to chercher)

Post #: 19

RE: at His request - 6/15/2006 8:34:10 PM

spankmepink11

Posts: 1310
Joined: 9/28/2005
Status: offline

chercher...i might add one thing to my previous post. As effective as it is to remember the displeasure caused by failures, it's even more motivating for me to think of the times i've pleased my Partner, and earned His look/signs of approval. Sometimes the anticipation of a "good girl" is enough to light a fire. (that...and recreational spanking...but thats another thread

)

(in reply to chercher)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> at His request

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.094