RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave?

RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive

Message

seekingreality -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/23/2012 1:24:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali I will preface this by saying I am a financial Domme. Yes I know most of you think I'm a horrible person and lazy and I should die. To those of you out there don't bother responding. You're posts will be deleted by support and I don't care. This is not a complaint or a rant but a genuine question. To all of the "subs" (I say it in quotes bc I'm convinced people who do this aren't real subs) fake being money slaves. What is the appeal? Especially on a site like this where there are so many people indulging in different fetishes without any money being exchanges. Are there not any female domme's who are willing to indulge you for free? I get that there are some fin domme's who are very cruel and into a lot of humiliation. And so some subs fake being a money sub so they will humiliate them for free. But why just message a fin Domme and say to want to be a money slave with no intention of doing it. Or exchange messages and emails for a long time when you really don't plan on following through? Isn't the excitement of it actually being a money slave? So then why fake it? Are these people just Doms in disguise who really get off and taking advantage of women? Is there a sexual trill from just having an extremely basic non fetish conversation? Do they just have nothing better to do with their time? I'm genuinely trying to understand so please if you have insight let me know. I don't really get the lure of financial domination myself. However, my guess is these people just have fun exchanging emails with you. They probably type up some fantasy and your just responding is enough to give them some wank material. If I were you, I wouldn't become frustrated; I would simply accept that there is going to a significant number of time wasters and build that into your business model. (Because you are running s business.) Then you have to become more skilled at screening and at converting the tire-kickers into buyers.

MariaB -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/23/2012 2:35:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rhymeswithcupid Might I suggest peddling your wares on a legitimate adult industry website? Niteflirt and Talk Sugar come to mind. Both sites are designed so men WILL pay for your time. Both sites have categories specifically for Financial Domination where men who actually truly do want to spend their money on you will be seeking and contacting you. Yes, you'll pay a portion of your earnings to use their site and you'll be reported for tax purposes but you'll waste a lot less time and fewer people will be inclined to resent you for wasting theirs. I'm sorry but Collarme is a social kink site and as someone who has worked in the adult industry herself, I have little respect for women who are too cheap to actually pay for the privilege of running their business. Applauds ^ this woman. You really need to take her advice. To the op. If you are going to be a fem domme then at least have a little self respect. Having a very public gripe about poor business really makes you look very amateur. You are being stung. Learn from it and improve your communication skills.

MstSebastian -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/23/2012 9:47:20 PM)
Okay, OP, you prefaced your question with an admission that many people do not like, or respect, FinDommes. So, let's just go from there. Personally, I have nothing against FinDommes so long as they ARE actual Dommes and not spoiled little 18 year-old brats with daddy issues who fancy themselves a princess. But, I digress... You know, full well, that many people out there think that financial domination is little more than a scam. So, my guess, is that there are quite a few people out there who take pleasure at screwing with the FinDommes who, they think, are only here to screw with others. It's a tit for tat situation here. "You came here to be lazy and fuck with men? Oh, well, then let me fuck with you first!" I don't support nor condone those actions, but it is a possibly reason. And, as others have said, perhaps CM isn't the best site for you as a FinDomme. This is, primarily, a social site for those in to lifestyle BDSM (some exceptions apply). So, yes, while there are FinDommes on here, most people view them as little more than scammers because of the ACTUAL scammers masquerading as FinDommes. It can be hard to be taken seriously when the very nature of your kink puts you in to a camp with people known to be, or at least seem to be, untrustworthy liars. Take that how you will.

coldslayer -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/24/2012 10:17:42 AM)
your shoes look sexy as fuck and i hate that shit too but its obvious why they do it

stef -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/24/2012 11:53:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BambiBoi But the idea that a Fin-Domme offers nothing for my money, except for the pleasure of taking it, makes me want justice. I want to see a little hustle for my money, and getting a Fin-Domme to squirm for it makes the difference. Mind you, I never bother wasting a Fin-Domme's time, but the "irony of sweet justice" appeals. With a straight face you admit that you will do absolutely nothing, nada, zilch for the bottom's money. Jesus, it's not even tax deductible. All I want is a little showmanship. You need to pay extra for showmanship. I don't see the appeal of the situation in any way myself, but it would stand to reason that the people who do send her money are doing so willingly and both parties are having their particular needs met. Why does this get folks knickers into such an epic twist?

BambiBoi -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/24/2012 12:29:52 PM)
That's a wonderful question. To be clear, so long as the activity meets the RACK-Reqs, I have zero objection to others doing it. I'm not on a soapbox trying to stop the Fin-Domme practice, but I felt invited to weigh in because I am a potential "fake money slave." I could see myself knowingly teasing a Fin-Domme along. I'm not proud of that, in fact I'm embarrassed by it. So the question is why don't I just leave well-enough alone? I'm not into spinal tapping, but I'd never think to tease someone who was about maybe getting together for a session. I suppose I'm cheap? Or the nicer way to say that: the concept of fair dealings is so deeply engrained that perceiving such a one sided arrangement bothers me. It's more than "I wouldn't do that." The practice is discordant with what I know vis-a-vis principles of equity, fairness, and justice. But I think there's something that makes me less vile. I don't mind the practice when its done behind my back in silence. Like I said, I never have (and never will) seek it out to destroy it. I do take objection to a Fin-Domme complaining that his or her (which reminds me, I'm opening Bambi's Fin-Domme services) methods do not work. A Fin-Domme who offers nothing in return, save the "service" of accepting payment has no consideration in the contract. I take objection to someone complaining that the world did not hand them something for proudly doing nothing.

stef -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/24/2012 3:46:29 PM)
It just irks me, I suppose. When folks start gathering pitchforks and torches over the actions of consenting adults that don't harm anyone else, it utterly reeks of hypocrisy considering the persecution a lot of us face over the way we live our lives. I suppose some folks just need a "them" to justify their own sense of "us."

LoveToBeBad -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/24/2012 6:43:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC There is a competition between you two automatically... you want to get the most money you can for the least product delivery and they want to get the most product for the least money. You'd be pretty cool if they'd just send you the money with no requirement to do anything on your part. They'd be pretty cool if you got their rocks off and they didn't need to send you any money. It's a business thing. How can this not be obvious? Did you actually believe that these guys all get off on giving you money for phone sex? Really? Insofar as tire kickers, I just talked to 3 insurance salesmen last week. I didn't buy any policies although I think I will this week. Does that strike you as odd somehow? Am I a fake insurance client? The above comment nailed it. Capitalism. I especially like the "fake insurance client" analogy. We feel strongly, we define terms, and we cast those who disagree with our defined terminology into the group of fake <some-group-name>

ThePrincessKali -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (11/27/2012 4:45:23 AM)
I think there are a lot of misconceptions of financial domination. Firstly that it's my job or my main source of income. It's not, I have two perfectly legitimate jobs. Secondly, I don't have phone sex or cam sex or whatever people think I do. I do enjoy the rush of getting gifts or money sent to me. It's like being a kid on Christmas morning. I do not "scam" anyone. I never make false promises or misrepresent myself and I almost never contact someone first. Subs willingly send me money, how is that a scam? Personally, I think lawyers are significantly overpaid sometimes. I was in an accident several years ago which turned into a lawsuit and I paid my lawyer 1/3 of the settlement I recieved which was a hell of a lot of money for what I consider not much work but I'm not going around trying to screw over lawyers everywhere. Im not trying to compare fin dommes to lawyers but just because you dont understand something doesnt mean you should go out of your way to fuck with people. You know what else I dont get? Christianty. Grew up Christian and it makes absolutely no sense to me. I dont have a problem with Christians, I just dont get it. Do I show up at churches every Sunday harassing people because I dont get their lifestyle? No. Because I'm not an asshole. Now that that's out of the way, I am not frustrated because I'm not getting enough money. I can live comfortable on what I make working. It's mainly the misrepresentation and the lying that bothers me. I have had subs go to such lengths as to purchase items from my wishlist, fwd me a copy of the confirmation, and then cancel the purchase. And for what? It just seems silly to lie about such dumb things but I suppose I've always been a very honest person and shame on me for thinking others were the same.

MistressxBanks -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/1/2012 4:41:38 AM)
Kali - first of all I recommend posting things like this in one of the Financial Domination groups on Fetlife where there are people who understand what we do. Anyway, as your post is here, I will say that everything you have written I can completely relate to as I've had exactly the same thing on here. It doesn't help that there is the very totalitarian rule that we cannot criticise other users, so we cannot warn each other about scammers. My guess is that all these fakes just want wank material, as others have said, or get a kick out of deception. I only use Paypal now as I have had so many people mark gifts as purchased or cancel Amazon gift certificates. You are right that it is the lying that is so much worse, especially when you think you are beginning to establish a bond with one of them only to find out they've been cancelling everything and lying to you! I am the same as you in that I am honest and am frequently disappointed to find others really aren't. Ignore the people on here that don't understand financial domination. Some have a problem with us because they think we're hookers, then when we tell them we aren't they get all butthurt because they think we get something for nothing. As if and planning and controlling every aspect of a slave's live isn't hard work! Making sure they are feeling happy and safe yet at the same time feeling used/humiliated/in pain or whatever it is they desire can be extremely tiring. That's not even mentioning sifting through piles of messages and getting messed about by time wasters as you mention. Rather than trying to explain what we do to people who won't listen, it's better just to keep ourselves to ourselves and enjoy the jealousy of the people who hate us. My guess is they envy that we can get money just for enjoying our kinks. Many of these people realise that they sell themselves, and an actual part of their life that they will never get back, at jobs many of them hate. They sell a whole hour of their lives for about £6, or the equivalent in their currency, whereas people pay us many times that just for a few minutes of the pleasure of our company. Why not let them think that? ;)

PrincessDonna11 -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/1/2012 5:03:23 AM)
Ok this is what I see...they can only go as far as you let them go.....having conversations for "long periods of time"? Whats up with that? If you are a pro.(sic) act like one! If someone has contacted you because they want to be Dommed that way then you should START RIGHT AWAY! Seperate tall timber from brush from the gate and give them what they are asking for...You wont accept a $30 pair of shoes? Those are perfect to use for those with foot ? tHE iM AFRAID fetishes..Im not going to have some one drooling over my $400 thats for sure....if you are truly a finDim than why is it you are setting limits? Can a man that offers $600 a month be less of a project then one that offers $2000? Then Im afraid my friend that you are going to be sadly disappointed in the future...and when you may need someone to help you the most that is when the high rollers may realize they have a bit of control available and step back a pace..Ive seen it all.... I once had a sub that had a foot fetish,was a great older man that worked for one of the biggest snack companies and although he didnt make alot because he did pick ups and deliverys at stores believe me there was never a time in 10 years that I dint have snacks for WHATEVER event came up,had a pantry just for chips and chili and the like...it was great..he never asked or expected more then just what he craved, he got to the point that he did pretty good pedicures too, and I mean snacks by the truck load it was crazy but I had kids and and always had something to take to school and could always entertain...the fun one was the ice cream man tho...lol be careful when inserting ice into body cavities..... What would YOU do for a freezer full of Klondike bars? This country was built on barter...put $ first and it will be the first thing to pull you down..just sayin.....

metamorfosis -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/1/2012 5:50:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali ...Do they just have nothing better to do with their time? My money's on this one. Pam

ThePrincessKali -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/1/2012 9:06:43 PM)
Lol PrincessDonna to each their own. As I said it isn't all about the money for me. I don't ever plan on relying on findom as my main source of income. I have a career for that. If you had read my profile it states that I am not a pro domme. There is no way in hell I'd wear a $30 pair of shoes lol. I suppose MisstrrssxBanks is right. I will not post financial domination related questions anymore on here.

CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/1/2012 11:15:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali I won't do "fetish talk" but I will tell them what I expect of slaves and what not. They will continue to talk with me many times and make up something about why they can't give money today but they can in a few days blah blah just to keep me responding to them. I can't imagine getting that much excitment from a just talking to someone. They are getting off on "hearing what you expect from a slave", imagining themselves in that position while they wank off. For them it's a hawt, free fantasy and you are their Drive Thru McDomme. As for the Amazon thing, I don't know what to say. It sucks that a complete (and asshat) stranger can learn your name and maybe street address. THAT...would scare the H out of me.

metamorfosis -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/2/2012 12:28:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali I will not post financial domination related questions anymore on here. I really wish you would reconsider that. If anything, your perspective is needed. Pam

littlewonder -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/2/2012 1:22:23 AM)
Here's the thing...you say they say they will buy something for you next week when they have the money. So why not just say to them, "Well then, look me up then. Until I receive my tribute, you are not to contact me as part of your punishment". This will turn them on and STILL get them to go away and not lead you on further since you can't seem to just tell them to go away.

ThePrincessKali -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/2/2012 2:44:34 AM)
Cynthia amazon doesn't reveal your address and I dont use my real name on my wishlist. It shows your city and state but I live in a major city so it's unlikely someone could find me based on that. And it is a dilemma bc I pride myself on being upfront. I will tell a sub what my expectations are because I think they deserve to know before they make the decision to serve and I'm ok with chatting a bit. I'm realistic I know most subs won't serve me based on a photo of my heels and a couple paragraphs lol it's just hard to find the line between being open and honest and giving someone free wank material. littlewonder, if a sub says they can tribute next week I tell them to hit the road until I see money if they're new. Those aren't really the problems it's the ones that have no intention of tributing but lie and say they do.

absolutchocolat -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/2/2012 2:05:59 PM)
rhymeswithcupid hit the nail on the head. if this is your business, it's wiser to set yourself up on a pay site where customers are less likely to scam you and waste your time. it's more productive than ranting on a thread, though i totally see where you're coming from.

ThePrincessKali -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/2/2012 3:56:51 PM)
As I stated many times. It is not my business. I have two jobs. Idk why everyone assumes fin domme's don't work lol. I will reiterate it again. Being a fin Domme is NOT my job. It's a hobby, one I take seriously, but not my main source of income. My issue is NOT that I am not making enough money it's the lying and misrepresentation that I'm confused about. It seems that I'm beating a dead horse so thank you everyone for the input.

seekingreality -> RE: No this is not a rant but a genuine question. Why fake being a financial slave? (12/2/2012 5:24:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali Lol PrincessDonna to each their own. As I said it isn't all about the money for me. I don't ever plan on relying on findom as my main source of income. I have a career for that. If you had read my profile it states that I am not a pro domme. There is no way in hell I'd wear a $30 pair of shoes lol. I suppose MisstrrssxBanks is right. I will not post financial domination related questions anymore on here. In my view if you solicit compensation in any form with the lure of providing domination service, you are a pro domme.

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875