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What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 11:26:55 AM

BambiBoi

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Some unknowable percentage of the bottoming population laments an "inability to bruise" like they are defective. What gives?

If you like being bruised/showing bruises, why? Is it the appearance or the sensation?
If you like inflicting/seeing bruises, why? Is it power exchange or sadism?
Do you foster an environment that encourages bruising?

I do not care for bruises. That the appearance is inelegant is not the problem. I love lots of inelegant things... I don't like the tender sensation. I don't see it as a reminder of sexy play time, but instead an injury that I need to mend. Conversely, I enjoy the sensation of soreness (from working out or otherwise).

So I return to my question: Bruises, what gives?

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 12:01:34 PM

AthenaSurrenders

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God only knows! I'm one who laments my inability to bruise, but it's difficult to tell you why...

I suppose for me as a huge wimp, a bruise is proof that yes, it was bloody hard and I did well to take it. I actually do quite like the tenderness. I also marvel at my body's ability to heal itself - this is true of any sort of visible injury for me - I like to see it getting gradually better. At the risk of sounding a bit silly it makes me amazed and strangely proud that my body can fix things.

I think mostly it's the reminder of the fun combined with feeling like a survivor - like I've come through something. For me it feels almost exactly like the muscle soreness after a real tough physical workout. It brings memories of the suffering and the endorphins and makes me feel like I endured something. I'm not (particularly) a masochist, but I like to feel like I have suffered, if that makes any sense.

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 12:03:24 PM

needlesandpins

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i like bruises alot. i like seeing them develope, feeling the sensitiveness of the area, knowing how i got them, that he has left a physical mark...stamped me for a while that stays after he's gone....feeling the pinch and sting from my bag strap on my shoulder as it rubs over, or rests on a bruise, all of it.

needles

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 12:25:52 PM

Thaz

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This isnt limited to kink. I know plenty of full contact martial arts types who wear their bruises as a badge of honour. Re-enactors too. Though there is a huge cross over tween kink and brit school re-enactment.

Spent quite a few lunch breaks comparing bruises with sparring partners to the horror of co-workers....

I dont bruise easy, something I'm proud of. But I wear my scars with pride and the fact that the phrase 'severed by sword blow' appears on my medical records is a good talking point...

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 12:32:03 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders
At the risk of sounding a bit silly it makes me amazed and strangely proud that my body can fix things.

My little engineer's brain is amazed quite frequently at what my body can do. Two situations that always amaze me are:

I've got a few too many things in my hands and I need to open a door. The fact that my hands... without any real conscious effort, can juggle whatever's in them to free up a finger or two to get the doorknob astonishes me. Robotics is nowhere near being able to do that.

Just recently I noted that walking up dark stairs where my brain wants some light is not on the upcoming step, but rather on 2-3 steps ahead. So without any conscious thought it's extrapolating the position of several stairs and placing my feet accordingly. It actually feels awkward to shine the light solely on the upcoming stair.

Then, as you noted, our self-repair ability. Don't we wish we could make cars that do that?

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 12:41:16 PM

littlewonder

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I like bruises because they are a reminder of Master's power over me. He likes bruises because they are a reminder of his power over me and he's a sadist so of course he likes bruises.

I used to never be able to bruise but now I'm older and the meds I take and just with my skin getting thinner as I get older, I bruise from the wind blowing.

Why do people show off their scars of battle, be it from a physical battle or a medical battle? Why do women like scars on men? Why do people talk about their wounds they received doing something?

< Message edited by littlewonder -- 11/26/2012 12:43:54 PM >

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 1:24:21 PM

Kana

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Bruises are my footprints on her body, to mirror my footprints on her heart :-)

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 1:58:40 PM

MAINEiacMISTRESS

Posts: 1180
Joined: 9/12/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Thaz

This isnt limited to kink. I know plenty of full contact martial arts types who wear their bruises as a badge of honour. Re-enactors too. Though there is a huge cross over tween kink and brit school re-enactment.

Spent quite a few lunch breaks comparing bruises with sparring partners to the horror of co-workers....

I dont bruise easy, something I'm proud of. But I wear my scars with pride and the fact that the phrase 'severed by sword blow' appears on my medical records is a good talking point...

Ok, let's stop that talk right NOW. You're being a TEASE.

(in reply to Thaz)

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 2:17:45 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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I only consider play being a power exchange if I'm doing it with My own. Otherwise, it's topping and bottoming. I can beat somebody without having the slightest bit of actual authority over them. Therefore, I would say that it has a high probability to do with sadism.

For the casual play part, I don't encourage an environment that encourages bruising. I'm not that person's owner, so if they want that result, they will have to do the encouraging on their own. More than once, I've had people come to Me specifically because they were not happy with the fact that they never bruise. One was so thrilled after we played together that he finally achieved bruising he took tons of pictures so he could show people that, Yes! He really did bruise from play! (He was really excited about it.)

When it's clip, those bruises (or any other marks that I should choose to put on him) are a reminder of who owns him. It's just a physical reminder.

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 3:18:53 PM

Lucifyre

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I love it when Mr bruises me. I don't mark easily, in fact most of the time I am only left with a little bit of pink on my skin and it doesn't last very long...usually a few minutes to an hourish.
After scenes where He has left marks on me I relish in the way my body feels. From the tingling sensation where the marks are even to the tirdness I feel because my body is working to heal itself. As long as the marks last, I will remain sexually *awake* the entire time. It is a constant physical reminder of how they got there and it keeps me charged.
The last time Mr marked me like that was in May for His birthday spankings. The bruises lasted about a week and frankly I couldn't get enough of Him the whole week.

And why haven't you called lately? I thought we had a lunch date coming up? :P

Lucifyre

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 3:57:08 PM

ARIES83

Posts: 3648
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I don't know, but i'll put my hand up as someone
who doesn't scar, I've had some major wounds in
my time but if you were to ask to see a scar, I
would be trying to point out some barely noticeable
discolouration or something thats barely a wrinkle.

Even after orthopaedic surgery and having a heap
of meccano installed theres nothing I'd be proud
to call a scar, I suppose scars like bruses make
you feel tuff or something but I'm pretty glad I'm
a good healer... beats the alternative.

-Aries

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 5:03:47 PM

kiwisub12

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Joined: 1/11/2006
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I enjoyed bruises because i would bump into them at work and have the slight pain to remind me of how i got them.

Very nice!

(in reply to ARIES83)

Post #: 12

RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 5:12:43 PM

Kana

Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ARIES83

I don't know, but i'll put my hand up as someone
who doesn't scar, I've had some major wounds in
my time but if you were to ask to see a scar, I
would be trying to point out some barely noticeable
discolouration or something thats barely a wrinkle.

Even after orthopaedic surgery and having a heap
of meccano installed theres nothing I'd be proud
to call a scar, I suppose scars like bruses make
you feel tuff or something but I'm pretty glad I'm
a good healer... beats the alternative.

-Aries

Chuckles.
I have a hat a friend gave me that says, "Scars are tattoos with better stories."
Which is good, cuz I got scars galore.
Personally, I like the Shane Falco line, "Pain heals, chicks dig scars, glory lasts forever."
That one works.

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HST

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 5:26:56 PM

ShaharThorne

Posts: 11071
Joined: 2/24/2009
From: Somewhere in TX
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I haven't had a relationship in quite a while but I don't bruise too often. Once in a while I will develop one but I have to deal with a very physical 4yo niece a few days of the week. Talk about the head butts....

I get the soreness though and that makes me happy. I am a pain slut (I do complain when my back is killing me because of the damnable mattress and how I sleep) and I get pain pills every 3 months to make sure I can move around.

Now if I can just find someone who can spank and flog me...

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 5:50:12 PM

NuevaVida

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Joined: 8/5/2008
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My body is weird. Sometimes I bruise, sometimes I don't. I really don't have an opinion about them either way - they don't do much for me.

He likes them, though. He likes seeing his handy work. The sadist in him likes seeing that he's wounded my skin.

My esthitician, though, gasps, laughs and shakes her head when she sees them.

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 6:57:19 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

Bruises are my footprints on her body, to mirror my footprints on her heart :-)

aaawwww

he's so sweet.

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 9:26:13 PM

BambiBoi

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I feel so callous for not having affection toward what I see as bodily damage. Am I alone in this? Does anyone else feel, as we say in Spanish, "me da igual?" (Meaning "I could take it or leave it.")

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 10:29:47 PM

NuevaVida

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BambiBoi

I feel so callous for not having affection toward what I see as bodily damage. Am I alone in this? Does anyone else feel, as we say in Spanish, "me da igual?" (Meaning "I could take it or leave it.")

I pretty much said I feel that way, in my post. They don't do much for me, either way.

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Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 10:52:09 PM

theSwan

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Joined: 11/12/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BambiBoi

I feel so callous for not having affection toward what I see as bodily damage. Am I alone in this? Does anyone else feel, as we say in Spanish, "me da igual?" (Meaning "I could take it or leave it.")

You're not entirely alone.
My Master's priority is to keep me in peak condition and that includes without any discoloration or injury.
The few times that any of his actions have resulted in lasting physical damage such as bruises or cuts
(Acquired more commonly through actions like sparring practice than sexual activity)
The command has been to take all actions to rectify that damage as quickly as possible.

We don't engage in any kind of sexual activity that would deliberately promote physical damage of any kind.
I do bruise easily though so it happens, sadly.
Wish I could pass that trait off to someone who would appreciate it, as I could certainly do without it.
(Scarring however, that I don't do, thankfully.)

One such reason it doesn't mean anything to us is because neither of us are particularly sadistic or masochistic.
Passionate sex, sure.
Rough and uncompromising, that happens too.
But neither of us deliberately chase pain, nor markings.

Another reason we avoid physical markings is that one of my services to him is the ability to be socially attractive at all times.
Going to the beach in a bikini with bruises just isn't as pretty as going without them, to him or most bystanders.

I would take it if it were his command.
We both deliberately leave it, as doing so better serves his interests.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
Bruises are my footprints on her body, to mirror my footprints on her heart :-)

However, I am forced to admit that I find this very touching. ( =

(in reply to BambiBoi)

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RE: What's the Big Deal about Bruises? - 11/26/2012 10:57:16 PM

Alice0in0Wonder

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Joined: 8/23/2012
Status: offline

I have the opposite affect i bruise too easily and it takes a while for them to heal. Personally Idon't like them. Bruises lead to questions I don't wish to answer 99% is the time.

(in reply to theSwan)

Post #: 20

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