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RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 12:09:21 PM

joyinslavery

Posts: 955
Joined: 6/21/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: male59sub

Once we have knelt in submission, tasted the whip and the cane across our flesh, offered our wrists and ankles for binding, knowing that painful torture would ensue, and accepted it without hesitation or protest, we are doomed. Nothing else can satisfy us, ever. our only salvation and "peace" is the never-ending quest to be used as we are meant to be. you are not alone brother slave, we all suffer so. i too, know of what you speak. we chase the unattainable, to offer and perform perfect service while knowing that we will always be in need of correction and discipline and control. It is our lot, it can never change.

john

an uncollared slave

I congratulate you john...this is the most beautiful post I've yet seen here and speaks, simply and eloquently, about our condition. I had to save this one...thank you! Good Luck to you!

_alexander

uncollared too (imagine that...lol)

(in reply to male59sub)

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Post #: 21

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 2:08:15 PM

Saint

Posts: 279
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LokisBrat

Speaking from a dominant perspective: Once you experience releasing the inner core of who you truly are, going back seems like existing without purpose. It is an addiction that I welcome.

LOKI

Well do I understand this perspective. There is no greater pain than realizing that for all you accomplish, all that you do, at the end of the day you really have no purpose other than survival without someone in your life who brings meaning to you.

_____________________________

"Anonymity is synonymous with longevity."
Faethor Ferenczy

"I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel tonight"
Nightwish - Wish I had an Angel Tonight

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Post #: 22

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 2:52:48 PM

MistressLorelei

Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
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If you are a naturally submissive person, without your former Mistress helping you see your self as you are... you might have gone forever unfulfilled in vanilla relationships. Now, you have the knowledge which will help you find the relationship that will fulfill you mind, body, and soul.

I think some of the strongest human beings in the world are submissive males. It takes strength to go against 'the norm' and be who you are. Nope, I don't think submissive males are cursed at all.

(in reply to subacceptance)

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Post #: 23

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 3:02:27 PM

whitenite

Posts: 1
Joined: 11/2/2004
Status: offline

Thank You, Mistress Lorelei. Reassuring to hear a Mistress such as You make that comment.

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RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 3:30:55 PM

Proprietrix

Posts: 756
Joined: 7/15/2005
From: Ohio/West Virginia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subacceptance

Sometimes I think being a male submissive is a curse. As much as I loved my first Mistress, I sometimes curse her for introducing me to the lifestyle. Although that was years ago, I have repressed my submissiveness and masochist desires, more due to a lack of suitable partners than anything else over the subsequent years. Yet to this day, they are a craving deep inside of me, that are times impossible to resist.
It is just so damm hard.

I might be just totally oblivious, but I don’t understand.
I read the replies and people say they feel your pain, which confused me even more.
Call me unsympathetic, but what exactly is the issue here?
You were introduced to the lifestyle. The relationship didn’t work out. And now you’ve decided to repress your urges for the lifestyle and view it as a curse?
It seems to me that you are making your own path to misery.
Why repress your urges? Why resist?
Go play at a dungeon. Go to a Pro-Domme. Go get involved in a munch group and make some friends who will invite you to their play parties. Go meet some play partners. Be the demo dummy at a workshop. Volunteer to clean up after play parties. There are tons of things you can do to have your desires met. They are your desires, therefore your responsibilities.
The only reason I can see from your post that things are so hard, is that you are choosing to make things hard on yourself.
It’s like someone introducing me to yogurt and I love it, but I repress my yogurt eating urges and resist the desire to eat it. Of course I’m going to feel bad.
If you deprive yourself of something you like, you’re going to feel….. deprived.
It kind of makes sense that if you deprive yourself of something you want, you’re not only not going to get it, but you’re going to feel bad for depriving yourself.
If you want to live the lifestyle, go live the lifestyle.
There ya go. Problem solved.

_____________________________

IMO, IMHO, YMMV, AFAIK, to me, I see it as, from my perspective, it's been my experience, I only speak for myself, (and all other disclaimers here).

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Re: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 3:49:09 PM

iliv2servher

Posts: 228
Joined: 5/17/2006
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Although I am not the OP, I would still like to express my appreciation to MotherEve, LadyHugs, Reflectivesoul, LokisBrat, MsKatHouston, MistressOfGa, MH00314, BlkTallFullfig and MistressLorelai, as well as all the rest of wonderful femdommes for being so supportive to those of us who have been chasing this dream for so many years. It is very gratifying and comforting to learn that not everyone here is cynical and quick to go on the offensive.

Most respectfully,

-iliv2servher

(in reply to MistressLorelei)

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Post #: 26

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 3:54:24 PM

Oumae

Posts: 911
Joined: 1/4/2005
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For me a positive attitude is attractive. I like a sub who is happy and confident in their submission. I think submissive are wonderful so don't see it as a curse at all.

Patience, being proactive and positive thinking will help along with wit, charm, intelligence etc lol.

Good luck,

Oumae

_____________________________

Is cuma le fear na mbrog ca leagann se a chos.
( The man with the boots does not mind where he places his foot)

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Post #: 27

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 4:28:26 PM

sabswife

Posts: 188
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

i havent read the replies yet but honestly-- with the way society is-- i think it shows much more strength than anything else to come out as a male submissive. its not easy to embrace who you are at times, even as a female submissive there are obstacles to face within a 'vanilla raised' mind.

weak? not a chance. to me it shows a lot of strength.

_____________________________

"If you look inside your heart, You don't have to be afraid--Of what you are. There's an answer, If you reach into your soul--And the sorrow that you know Will melt away."

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RE: Re: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 4:35:46 PM

Reflectivesoul

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*hugs ilive* you're a sweety *smiles*

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

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RE: Re: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 5:41:29 PM

subacceptance

Posts: 19
Joined: 1/8/2006
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Perhaps I should have posted, that I am more lonely in the alternative lifestyle than I ever was in the vanilla world.

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Post #: 30

RE: Re: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 7:04:15 PM

MistressLorelei

Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subacceptance

Perhaps I should have posted, that I am more lonely in the alternative lifestyle than I ever was in the vanilla world.

Then participate in your local bdsm community... meet people, offer your services to Dominant Women, go to munches. Doesn't Atlanta have a large bdsm community?

Most likely a Dominant Woman is not going to come riding up on her Black Stallion and carry you off into the sunset.... make things happen to the best of your ability, or try the vanilla scene again if settling will make you happier than being patient... either will be more productive than simply feeling sorry for yourself.

< Message edited by MistressLorelei -- 6/17/2006 7:05:42 PM >

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Post #: 31

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 7:47:50 PM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
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Some of the most intelligent, sweet, sexiest men I've known have been submissive. Is it a curse? No not unless you make it into one. I for one believe it is a blessing and something to be proud of.

You will meet the right Mistress, it just takes time like any relationship.

~Lashra

(in reply to amayos)

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Post #: 32

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 8:01:34 PM

Reflectivesoul

Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
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Well said Lashra

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!

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Post #: 33

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/17/2006 9:06:06 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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Being true to yourself is pretty much the hardest thing around.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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Post #: 34

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/18/2006 8:08:04 PM

Hercuckslave

Posts: 103
Joined: 5/21/2006
Status: offline

keep the faith brothers. i know exactly how you feel, as i chased that holy grail for years before being blessed with Mistress. i have been her faithful collared slave for over 5 years now and can not describe the peace and contentment that it has brought to my life.

one thing to point out though, and please understand that this is my opinion only. so many speak of the vast disparity between the number of dominant women and submissive men. i think when you really seperate the wheat from the chaff you find that these numbers are really not that far apart. the problem that the truly slave wired male is bound to encounter is the overwhelming number of players, thrill seekers, kinksters and fantasy boys who "call" themselves submissives, but really have no clue or desire about true service and submission. with all these men out there, i am sure that it is difficult for the truly dominant woman to weed through them, and therefore difficult for the sincerely submissive male to either stand out in the crowd, or be taken seriously.

as a slave wired male who searched for years for one to claim me and own me, i can only offer this....take care of the property. be the best you that you can be. learn yourself. learn what it is you need and what it is that you are prepared to offer.

i love, worship, adore, serve and obey Mistress.

(in reply to amayos)

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Post #: 35

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/19/2006 12:11:13 AM

Master96

Posts: 593
Joined: 2/13/2006
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Greetings everyone,

I agree with TemptingNviceSub, sabswife and MistressLorelei.
Also Proprietrix, you got a point there.

Good luck,
Master,

(in reply to Hercuckslave)

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Post #: 36

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/19/2006 2:45:34 AM

liljoy

Posts: 577
Joined: 3/25/2004
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Is being a male submissive a curse?

well sure it is sometimes but then being a submissive is a curse sometimes m or f. It leaves us open to the preditors so we have to be more cautious.
As with any realationship. when it works it's beautiful when it doesn't it's hell.
lil_joy

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Post #: 37

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/19/2006 5:43:34 AM

soldierfunuk

Posts: 56
Joined: 5/12/2006
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Does that make me cursed, I don't think so. I am very happy being who I am. I get great pleasure out of being submissive. I am proud to be a sub. The only way I am even slightly cursed is in not having a Mistress at the moment. That will come in time and I can then throw myself into the situation. So no, I don't consider myself cursed just maybe ever so slightly unlucky to be unowned.

_____________________________

Property of Mistress Angel.
Please return if lost.

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Post #: 38

RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/19/2006 6:11:17 PM

sjacket

Posts: 152
Joined: 1/4/2004
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It is only a curse if you let it be one. To call it a curse implies you have no opportunity to change the outcome- it's destinty, fate, whatever..... It may be frustrating, you may feel there is no hope of ever finding another. Almost all of us have gone thru that at least once. I spent 5+ yeaars in a pretty serious search to find my Partner. It took a couple of mis-tries, but now we are together. She has my deepest love and respect, and I know She feels the same. How could it be a curse to feel such happiness in giving myself to Her?

Even when i was sure there was noone out there for me, I NEVER considered it a curse.

Good luck in your search.

_____________________________

Have you hugged your Sadist today?

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RE: Is being a male submissive a curse? - 6/19/2006 7:15:45 PM

peterK50

Posts: 433
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It's certainly a buyers market for male slaves.

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Post #: 40