Age

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helboy2323 -> Age (12/24/2012 1:05:25 PM)
why is it i will always run into a problem of Age i have been looking for either a local domme or an online one and unable to find one because of age and i hate this. any help on this matter?

OsideGirl -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 1:12:36 PM)
Your best bet is attending local munches and TNG groups. The number of sub men far outnumber Dominant women, so you'll honestly have a better shot in a real life environment where you can really show who you are and that you're mature enough to be worth the effort.

FelineFae -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 1:23:21 PM)
Patients is a virtue, Grasshopper. What is it exactly about age that has complicated the pursuit of a Domme partner for you? There are several existing threads related to difficulties with age. If you fear that you're too young, you might feel that you are being passed over due to either a lack of maturity, commitment and/or devotion, or inexperience. Maturity = If you have to inform someone you're mature, you aren't. Commitment = It will take time for someone to trust that your passion has staying power. That's just how it goes. Your would-be partner has to trust that this is more to you than just a flash in the pan interest. No one wants to waste their time. Inexperience = Some people are okay with taking on someone just starting out, some are not. That's just the way it goes. Lastly, your problem may not be so much that you're young. It might be the fact that you are one of many young male subs, and there are far less Dommes to this ratio.

ServiceBoy89 -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 1:32:31 PM)
I'am 23 and look for women between 28 and 37.It turn me on to be with older woman.They know who they are and know many things that this ''wonna be''young girls don't.[8D] lol.And if they are slim with long black hair to their ass and this specific light blue eyes I'am forever her servant.But it is so rare to find this type.

SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 1:47:23 PM)
My Kittyboi is 21, so not much older than you. I'm 41. Pretty big difference there, right? Here's what he has that you don't, at least as far as I can tell from your profile: He has a life and a personality outside of kink and it shows on his profile. He talks about his vanilla interests and skills, such as sewing and cooking. It doesn't take a lot of imagination to see how those would be useful to a dominant. He also talks about the things he enjoys in a D/s relationship that have nothing to do with kink sex; simple things like feeling safe and warm in the arms of his dominant. Your profile contains very little information about you, and what is there makes you look very confused. You're new but you've been submissive a long time? You're a switch but you're a sub? Make up your mind! Right now, you're giving very mixed signals and that's going to work against you. If you send the same mixed signals in person, all the TNG munches in the world won't help you. So take some time to figure out who you are and what you want. Most 19-year-olds don't have the faintest clue about either of those and that is going to hinder your ability to find a partner until you have a solid grasp on what you want/need from a BDSM relationship. It's kinda hard to hit a target if you don't know what you're aiming at, ya know?

stef -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 1:59:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: FelineFae Patients is a virtue, Grasshopper. So is patience. Hellboy, life isn't a drive-thru. Vanilla relationships don't fall from trees and BDSM relationships are even harder to find. Get out and make friends first. As OsideGirl says, look into the TNG groups that are out there and just let things happen. People desperate for a relationship just come across as desperate, and that's one of the most unattractive things out there. Good luck.

FelineFae -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 2:08:43 PM)
<<< can't spell even with a brand new shiny Spell Checker on her ToolBar. i have Fail'd at Epic level, no? [sm=lol.gif]

RumpusParable -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 2:10:08 PM)
You're going to get basically the exact same responses here as you did on Fetlife. Also just like there, your profile says nothing about you and what you can offer to a dominant woman. Great, you're looking for a dom and are a sub. What else? Who are you? What do you offer? Skills, interests, stories, activities, etc? What are you doing with your life? Why should a woman of any age be interested in you and spend time with you? For those of us open to younger men we have to have a reason to be interested in you as an individual. You give no info there or here about yourself to even start from. Begin with that and while it is still likely to take some time to find the right person(s), it's sure as hell going to increase your odds of doing so.

DarkSteven -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 2:24:55 PM)
Have you specifically been told that the issue is your age?

helboy2323 -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 5:17:38 PM)
Yes i have been told i am too young and therefore unable to find a Domme at all

Hillwilliam -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 5:23:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ServiceBoy89 I'am 23 and look for women between 28 and 37.It turn me on to be with older woman. That's YOUNG to me. [8D]

Rule -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 5:30:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: helboy2323 any help on this matter? Yes: Fuck the ages. Just go and get yourself a domme. You may meet your domme tomorrow when crossing a street.

RumpusParable -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 5:31:51 PM)
OP, I think you might want to seriously consider the fact that you didn't respond to my questions and comments -that normally isn't some big sign or anything (my ego isn't that big), but it is part of a pattern you show and likely has a big amount to do with what the problem you're having is: when others on Fetlife asked you the same sorts of things you dodged on them too, then deleted your OP instead of honestly addressing our questions and suggestions. Frankly, I think maturity is largely your issue. I'll date and be served by males younger than me, but I also will use "you're too young for me" as a tidy way of telling a young and immature person that I find them both (whereas, if they were young and showed a great amount of maturity and promise I wouldn't). You may well be getting short-hand for "you act too young*.

SomethingCatchy -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 6:02:12 PM)
Without really knowing you, and seeing your profile and your responses to this thread I'm going to say that your lack of life experience has directly affected your maturity level and that may be the reason women aren't interested in you. There's nothing to do about that scenario except just keep being yourself and do whatever you can to improve yourself. We all go through that phase and it's nothing to be angry or ashamed of. This too shall pass.

jay1371 -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 7:28:53 PM)
Be yourself bro...let your target audience see you for who you are and not just what you want. Hell, if your looking to serve someone, at least in my humble opinion, it's better to show what you can bring to the table then just specifically what you want. I too am trying to achieve that...and I should probably add more to my profile myself lol. But good luck bro. Imo being yourself is the most important, but that doesn't mean you can't specifically show the qualities of yourself that will get noticed right? ;) Happy Holidays

Hillwilliam -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 8:05:10 PM)
Jay, you're showing that you have potential. You're correct in thinking more things in your profile will help. Put in non kink interests and what kind of (nonsexual) skills you have that a lady might like. For instance, are you a good cook? Do you play an instrument? Also, you might wish to put in a different profile pic without the hoodie. Let them see your face better. Merry Christmas. Consider that a gift from an anonymous experienced Dom to a newbie who shows promise and maturity past his age.

RumpusParable -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 9:19:11 PM)
Yeah, not to sound condescending, but you've been doing great around here Jay with seeming to really take stuff in. Awesome.

SeekingTrinity -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 9:38:22 PM)
~FRing it~ Aw, I liked the hoodie pic [:)]

HarryVanWinkle -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 9:45:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ServiceBoy89 I'am 23 and look for women between 28 and 37.It turn me on to be with older woman.They know who they are and know many things that this ''wonna be''young girls don't.[8D] lol.And if they are slim with long black hair to their ass and this specific light blue eyes I'am forever her servant.But it is so rare to find this type. So, in other words, you're looking for a slim, blue eyed, long dark haired, 28 to 37 year old Fetish Delivery System? I wish you luck with that. I think when you grow up enough to accept that women are people, not fantasy objects and start looking for one who appeals to your heart and soul rather than one who just appeals to your eyes, you might have better luck.

HarryVanWinkle -> RE: Age (12/24/2012 9:48:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: helboy2323 Yes i have been told i am too young and therefore unable to find a Domme at all There is a cure for being too young to find a Domme. It's called time. There's also a cure for being too old to find a Domme. It's called death. Be glad you've got the time.

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