Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (Full Version)

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kdsub -> Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 8:57:17 PM)

I am level headed and very seldom let my temper get the best of me when debating here on CM. But…every once in a great while I lose a bit of control. Usually not because of what is said to me but because I sign on in a bad mood and my personal frustration is close to the surface.

I’ve done it twice and I am going to use names so perhaps this thread will be moderated quickly. I want to use names because besides others input I also want to apologize even if belatedly.

This would be a good thread for those reading this thread to apologize if they feel the need.

I will not get into specifics but for some reason my conscious has been bothering me and It will be nice to get things off my chest.

The first and by far the worst is an apology to tazzy. She is a very intelligent woman that can be frustratingly tedious in her posts but there is no better here on CM in finding information on any subject we are talking about. There was a thread once that we were going back and forth as we often do but I was in one of my bad moods. As an example for a point she was trying to make she used a relative. I like an ass I was that night told her I didn’t give a damn about her relative and it had nothing to do with what we were talking about. This was hurtful I’m sure and I immediately realized this but was too stubborn to say so.

SOOO… Now tazzy I want to say I’m truly sorry.

The second instance that is on my mind is an exchange with tweak. I called her ignorant and a racist. She is not ignorant that’s for sure and although I feel she lacks perspective on Israel and the Palestinians I know her heart is in the right place and not a racists.

SOOO… Now tweak I would like to apologize and promise I will try to explain my positions better.

I guess the purpose of this thread is to allow others to clear the waters so to speak so in the future we can reduce the animosity here on Collarme… So feel free to apologize by name… unless Tos shuts this thread down. I hope it doesn’t because of the reason for using names is to say we are sorry.

Butch



jlf1961 -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 8:58:11 PM)

Yes, when I was dealing with a few of the foil hat crowd that used to be here.



TNDommeK -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:00:57 PM)

I wouldn't say my conscious ever bothered me but there was one post, or thread rather that made Me what to hide My head in the sand. Of course I was BRAND NEW and young then. [sm=goodnight.gif]



Marini -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:14:19 PM)

What a thoughtful thread Butch, I don't see why this thread needs to be moved, it is on topic right?

Your conscious is tied into your spiritual/religious beliefs, right?

[;)]
I think we all need to be more respectful and thoughtful about the "tone" we use, and how we talk to others online.
It is possible to have a discussion with someone you disagree with/and has a totally different point of view, without demeaning the other person, and talking "down" to them, because they DARE look at things differently than you.

I decided to TRY to take the "high road" on here years ago, which is why I don't even bother responding or posting on many of the "heated" threads.

Many here are like a dog with a bone on many threads and topics, and can argue endlessly ad naseum, and for what?
Often, the back and forth dialogue/when people continue to say the SAME DAMN THING 50 different ways, make the parties involved appear a bit "unhinged".

[sm=argue.gif][sm=rantint.gif] [sm=beatdeadhorse.gif]

I often think, damn let it go, Move on.
Many people on here argue like their lives are depending on it, and I hope that is not the case!
Live and let live/ To each their own!

Viva la Difference
Peace



tazzygirl -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:24:54 PM)

quote:

The first and by far the worst is an apology to tazzy. She is a very intelligent woman that can be frustratingly tedious in her posts but there is no better here on CM in finding information on any subject we are talking about. There was a thread once that we were going back and forth as we often do but I was in one of my bad moods. As an example for a point she was trying to make she used a relative. I like an ass I was that night told her I didn’t give a damn about her relative and it had nothing to do with what we were talking about. This was hurtful I’m sure and I immediately realized this but was too stubborn to say so.

SOOO… Now tazzy I want to say I’m truly sorry.


You and I have gone round and round on a few topics. But I do remember this one, and, yes, it was a bit hurtful. But I also have developed a much thicker skin as a result.

Thank you for the apology.

Now, on to your question.

When I first started posting, I made a stupid comment, tongue in cheek.. and got reamed by many, including Holly. I quickly learned a few lessons in that thread.

There have been times when I was in a bad mood, and posted things I didnt necessarily regret, but which, if I had been in a better mood and simply walked away for a while, I would have phrased differently.

I feel I have become a much better poster, not because of how I have had my feelings hurt, but because of the reactions to my own posts from others.

You, my dear, are not alone.




ChatteParfaitt -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:38:05 PM)

This:

quote:

There have been times when I was in a bad mood (note, for me this often means lack of good pain management), and posted things I didnt necessarily regret, but which, if I had been in a better mood and simply walked away for a while, I would have phrased differently.

I feel I have become a much better poster, not because of how I have had my feelings hurt, but because of the reactions to my own posts from others.


I think I could tell from a review of my posts which ones were made when it was time for my meds. My pain management regime has changed in the past few months for the better, and I think you could tell that too. I'm under the impression my posts are more even-handed, but you know, my responses are always going to reflect my dual nature.

As far as my conscious bothering me, hell no. I don't get snarky just for the entertainment value, there is almost always a lesson there.




JeffBC -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:40:50 PM)

Hey Hey! I'm still here and I got my tinfoil hat somewhere nearby!

@Butch:
Sure. I can't remember specific incidents but I have my bad hair days like everyone else. Sometimes I don't measure up to my own standards. I'd be really, really worried if that weren't true.

edited to add:
I was just thinking about needlessly hurtful things I've said. Lord only knows I've made some stupid assed posts in my day too. Particularly the earlier posts.



Marini -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:43:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

Hey Hey! I'm still here and I got my tinfoil hat somewhere nearby!

@Butch:
Sure. I can't remember specific incidents but I have my bad hair days like everyone else. Sometimes I don't measure up to my own standards. I'd be really, really worried if that weren't true.


What NEVER ceases to amuse me is, how thin skinned some of the snarkiest and nastiest posters are.

Online and in the real world, it is amazing how so many can dish it out, but almost go berserk when someone does it to them.

Sometimes I might come close to wearing a tin foil hat myself, if you speak your mind and go against the "herd", you will be said to need one.

I am only going to wear the damn thing, if ALL you people on here start wearing one FIRST.
[sm=club.gif]



kdsub -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:50:34 PM)

This apology is long overdue and would have meant more if i had done it right away. I really do thank you for accepting my apology and I can only hope it will mean more to you if you know it has been bothering me for a long time. Most every comment I made to a post of yours I thought of it. It is just not me but then again it was.

I can tell you also I was in a terrible mood and i was not saying something i believed... I was saying it only because i was mad at something else...No excuse just an explanation.

When it comes to making stupid comments I'm afraid I have not learned my lesson yet. But really I don't want to...This way when i say something it will ring true even if wrong...Otherwise I've found the first thing that comes to mind it usually your true feeling on a subject. What I do believe however is when I am presented with a logical opposing view to mine I am not too stubborn to change my mind...I hope that rings true as well.

Butch



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:53:48 PM)

Although it has been many a year since I have posted on here, I cannot think on any reply that I regret.I am at times gentle in my reply and others not so much.Often it depends on if a paddle is needful or possibly a hammer.



kdsub -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:55:14 PM)

quote:

I am only going to wear the damn thing, if ALL you people on here start wearing one FIRST


My grandson puts stickers on mine...[:D]

Of all people not needing to post on this thread I would be you Marini. I truly do admire, and I've said it before, how your posts are always none confrontational yet get the very heart of any discussion you chose to comment on and make perfect sense... Do you give lessons...lol

Butch



Marini -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:57:59 PM)

quote:

My grandson puts stickers on mine...

Of all people not needing to post on this thread I would be you Marini. I truly do admire, and I've said it before, how your posts are always none confrontational yet get the very heart of any discussion you chose to comment on and make perfect sense... Do you give lessons...lol

Butch


You are so kind Butch, I heart you.
Honestly, I decided to make an attitude adjustment around here a few years ago, and I think I have come a long way.
Thank you so much for noticing.
[sm=mademyday.gif]



kdsub -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 9:59:46 PM)

If you have convictions and stick to them without purposely and I may add falsely making your comment personal rather than the subject then you have nothing to apologize for. I did not always do that however.

Butch



littlewonder -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 10:03:31 PM)

I can't really think of any posts I've ever written that have bothered me later. I don't put enough stock with online stuff to think twice about it. To be honest, usually once I write something and I've left the thread, I don't even remember what I wrote.

The other day someone emailed me about something I had written on the forums the day before. I had no clue what the person was talking about so I had to go through thread after thread to try and figure out what the person was referring to. It's just not important enough for me to even remember.



marie2 -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 10:07:06 PM)

No, my conscious almost never bothers me, nevermind on a message board. I don't say things that I don't genuinely mean.



Marini -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 10:07:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I can't really think of any posts I've ever written that have bothered me later. I don't put enough stock with online stuff to think twice about it. To be honest, usually once I write something and I've left the thread, I don't even remember what I wrote.

That may be the case with you, lw.

Many of us do CARE.
I don't mean "thin skinned type of caring", or loosing sleep type of caring.

I have been on CollarME 8 years, and I love this place.
I am not ashamed to say it, nor am I going to act like I don't care.
I do like/love it here, enjoy myself, and I care, or I would not be here.

CollarME is my online "Cheers" bar, and when I take my seat at the bar, its comforting to see a few familiar and friendly faces around me.
In fact, I plan to start a thread on that soon.
Cheers!

The other day someone emailed me about something I had written on the forums the day before. I had no clue what the person was talking about so I had to go through thread after thread to try and figure out what the person was referring to. It's just not important enough for me to even remember.





littlewonder -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 10:09:41 PM)

I understand that. For me though, my "Cheers" bar would be with real life faces of people I know in real life.



Marini -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 10:14:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I understand that. For me though, my "Cheers" bar would be with real life faces of people I know in real life.


21 years ago, in another lifetime I used to be a bartender, and I like this place a lot more.
[;)]
Okay missy, I am scratching you off my Cheers list.
No stool at the bar for you!
No soup for you either, so don't ask.

Butch, I need another drink, I am not driving tonight, thank you.

This is my "online" Cheers bar, damn it.
[sm=buddies.gif]



kdsub -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 10:21:13 PM)

quote:

I understand that. For me though, my "Cheers" bar would be with real life faces of people I know in real life


I've been thinking on what you said...for me it is different. There are things I will talk about here on CM that I would not be able to with my friends. Not just the subject of lifestyle but many subjects they just would not be interested in. I must admit i often bare my soul here... I write some of my deepest beliefs for others to read that would not necessarily present themselves in a normal friends only conversation. Our interests here are so varied and I do like to read how others feel about what is important to me.

I find kindred spirits here and do feel a connection. I like people here even those I most often disagree with. Of course I realize the feelings are most likely not reciprocal but that is not important to me…I guess it is just how I feel and the pleasure it gives me.

Butch



littlewonder -> RE: Does your conscious ever bother you over what you’ve said on Collarme? (12/28/2012 10:45:53 PM)

Kana sez, "I don't think of this place as "Cheers" so to speak (Though it can be sloppy and fun sometimes). For me, it's a whole lot more like online Rock-em-Sock-em Robots
Man, I like those things



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