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ORIGINAL: littlewonder

When I see people, be it dom or sub, rant either in their profiles or on the forums, it usually says to me they are frustrated with the people they are choosing to contact them or what they see online. It means their life attitudes are all tied up in finding a partner in life instead of just going with the flow and being happy in their lives and realizing that when the right one comes along, it will happen.

Or it means they are still hurt from a past relationshp and they are not over their issues yet or they are not very good at choosing people to contact and if that is true then they need to look at why that is true. And why are you attracting such people? Is it your profile and the way you come across? Is it your attitude about life in general? Or is it for the simple fact that you are a femdomme? Sorry, but femdommes do get the worst of the pickings around here. I hate to put down malesubs but ya know....have you seen what's around? It's not too optimistic.

But just because of that fact, does not mean they need to let the frustration carry into their lives and their profiles. It only makes the rants and choices even more difficult on them.

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact

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ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle
Lady Pact. It's nice to see you too. I wasn't talking about the occasional outburst, but of those profiles and journals which are nothing but outburst. Good point about those demonstrations of nothing but anger being an excellent way to know whom to avoid. But can none of those women understand that their constant rants about being contacted by "fakes and flakes" become self fulfilling prophecy? Anybody serious who does try to read through their profiles reacts with "another one of these," and clicks out of it.

If negative is all a person writes about, who could blame anyone for running to the hills? What a terrible first impression!

I have to wonder though, does everything being positive have a similar effect? Does it substantiate the myth that Dominant women don't have the full range of emotions?

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ORIGINAL: metamorfosis

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ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle
I've long believed that one of the most important characteristics of a dominant is self control. If she can't control herself, ride herd at least on her emotions, she's probably dangerous.... What use are the angry outbursts which accomplish nothing?

There are two distinct "camps" on this issue. The first (the "first Master yourself" folks) put self discipline above all else. The second put emotional honesty first. There's nothing wrong with either position. The question is simply... which camp do you belong to?

Pam

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ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I see more anger and whining from males that define themselves as submissive and/or slave than all of the other designations combined.

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I see more anger and whining from males that define themselves as submissive and/or slave than all of the other designations combined.

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ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle
Any man who thinks that women don't have the full range of emotions obviously hasn't had much to do with women.

We do have a few of those here.

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Any man who thinks that women don't have the full range of emotions obviously hasn't had much to do with women.

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ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle

I've long believed that one of the most important characteristics of a dominant is self control. If she can't control herself, ride herd at least on her emotions, she's probably dangerous. I just looked at the 87,000th Dominant woman's profile That is a MAJOR fuckload...you are to be praised! I've seen in which the journal, and often the "about me" section, rages on and on about the "fakes and flakes" who don't bother to read their profiles completely before writing to them and rail on and on about all the other shortcomings of of the vast majority of men who write them. They are especially incensed by wankers. I only wank in public restaurants.

I realize that dozens of emails a day from Wankers can get pretty frustrating. But, isn't frustration one of those destructive emotions which a Dominant person should be able to keep under control?

As Jesus said, "Wankers you will have with you always." Leviticus 7....good call bud. What good does it do to rail on in your profile and journal against men who don't read your profiles and journals before writing their little, jack off notes. You're preaching, or should I say, screeching to the Choir; throwing tantrums at those who won't read your tantrums, thus giving the impression that you are an angry, out of control woman. Meanwhile, the wankers pay no attention to your rants, because they don't read that far.

Ladies, any of you who have been on this site for any length of time knows how many wankers there are here, and know that as you list yourselves as Women, that you're going to draw them like moths to a flame. What use are the angry outbursts which accomplish nothing? Wouldn't it be far better to put something near the end of your profile, saying something like, "For the first word of your email to me, write, 'Rumpelstiltskin.'" Or something equally unlikely. Such a system would make it easy for you to separate the wheat from the chaff, so to speak, quickly.

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ORIGINAL: naughtynick81

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Any man who thinks that women don't have the full range of emotions obviously hasn't had much to do with women.

But men are expected to be emotionless or else they are whiny and need to man up.

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ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

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ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle

I've long believed that one of the most important characteristics of a dominant is self control. If she can't control herself, ride herd at least on her emotions, she's probably dangerous. I just looked at the 87,000th Dominant woman's profile That is a MAJOR fuckload...you are to be praised! I've seen in which the journal, and often the "about me" section, rages on and on about the "fakes and flakes" who don't bother to read their profiles completely before writing to them and rail on and on about all the other shortcomings of of the vast majority of men who write them. They are especially incensed by wankers. I only wank in public restaurants.

I realize that dozens of emails a day from Wankers can get pretty frustrating. But, isn't frustration one of those destructive emotions which a Dominant person should be able to keep under control?

As Jesus said, "Wankers you will have with you always." Leviticus 7....good call bud. What good does it do to rail on in your profile and journal against men who don't read your profiles and journals before writing their little, jack off notes. You're preaching, or should I say, screeching to the Choir; throwing tantrums at those who won't read your tantrums, thus giving the impression that you are an angry, out of control woman. Meanwhile, the wankers pay no attention to your rants, because they don't read that far.

Ladies, any of you who have been on this site for any length of time knows how many wankers there are here, and know that as you list yourselves as Women, that you're going to draw them like moths to a flame. What use are the angry outbursts which accomplish nothing? Wouldn't it be far better to put something near the end of your profile, saying something like, "For the first word of your email to me, write, 'Rumpelstiltskin.'" Or something equally unlikely. Such a system would make it easy for you to separate the wheat from the chaff, so to speak, quickly.

Rumpelstiltskin

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Nick, you're starting to remind me of a guy I know who's always whining about how nobody wants to play with him.

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You can live with it or you can spend your whole life whining about it and accomplish absolutely nothing.

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ORIGINAL: naughtynick81

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You can live with it or you can spend your whole life whining about it and accomplish absolutely nothing.

But women are never told this. Women constantly complain about men only wanting one thing, but it's okay because the complainer is a woman.

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ORIGINAL: naughtynick81

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I see more anger and whining from males that define themselves as submissive and/or slave than all of the other designations combined.

On a whole, I wonder which gender generally has more trust issues towards the opposite gender?

I would have to say there are too many women on this site and in any other area in the world that have serious trust issues towards men. Men are usually deemed as someone who is guilty until proven innocent simply because they have a penis between their legs.

This type of negativity/anger towards men is far more common than any other type of negativity when it comes to dating/BDSM.

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ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle

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ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I see more anger and whining from males that define themselves as submissive and/or slave than all of the other designations combined.

I'm not saying you're wrong on that. I haven't had the, umm, pleasure, of reading many submissive male profiles.

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Nick I wouldn't trust you as far as I could throw an old Buick. But that has NOTHING AT ALL to do with your gender.

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ORIGINAL: naughtynick81
But women are never told this. Women constantly complain about men only wanting one thing, but it's okay because the complainer is a woman.

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ORIGINAL: naughtynick81

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Nick, you're starting to remind me of a guy I know who's always whining about how nobody wants to play with him.

Where did I ever make such a complaint on this thread?

Oh there is none.

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You can live with it or you can spend your whole life whining about it and accomplish absolutely nothing.

But women are never told this. Women constantly complain about men only wanting one thing, but it's okay because the complainer is a woman.